âI donât want to make him⦠bang me,â I point out, unable to believe weâre having this conversation, and all I get in reply is a hearty, sexy laugh.
âOh, I know, and knowing him, he wonât. Whether you want a man to bang you or not is beside the point, chica~.~ You have sexuality and the goods to make men want you.
âWork it, play a little. Make Colton regret the day he ever said I donât. I mean, why make it easy on the boy when itâs so much more fun to make him squirm.â
She swings her hips and makes a pelvic thrusting jerk, giggling at her motion, and returns to hauling clothes out of the closet and throwing them across to the bed between us.
My nerves catapult to the ceiling as I watch an array of small clothing items, with low-cut or short, almost-not-there cut flying by.
âI donât want to play games or make this hard for him. He made his choice, and I donât, I mean, Iâm notâ¦,â I stammer awkwardly, really overheating with shame at the skimpy choices sheâs laying out.
She shushes me again with a finger on her lips and fixes me with a penetrating look, resting her hand on her hip and leaning into it.
âI get it, a good girl just trying to find her place somewhere she donât wanna be. Youâre a virgin, and you think all there is, is a marked mate or being eternally untouched while you wait to be marked.
âWhy are you pushing yourself into the shadows and becoming invisible? Youâre a pretty girl.
âYouâve more right than Carmen to be in our pack, and trust me, nothing will piss her off more than to see you take your place, making our alpha more besotted with you than he already is.â
âYou donât like her much, do you?â I blanch and canât get my head around this.
She doesnât seem like she has all that much care in her heart for someone who has run with their sub-pack for two years since Carmen paired up with Colton.
She was never my choice. Weâve never warmed. Stupid girl. Far too jealous for her own good, and she tried to damage the bond I have with Colton.
She made that mistake one too many times, and now, she donât got herself a sister who is sad to see her pushed out. She brings nothing but drama to our unit. She needs to go.â
Meadow stops throwing items my way and sighs heavily, her eyes darting back at me, and she delivers a soft smile.
âI have an ulterior motive, chica. For thisâ¦â She waves her arms around us at the chaos of clothes and comes back to stand before me, reaching out and tugging a strand of my hair through her fingers.
âWhich is?â I ask brazenly, feeling somehow deep down that I can trust her. Thereâs something about her that tells me sheâs not my enemy.
âJuan has given Colton an order. By the next cycle, he has to have marked Carmen and put an end to this.
âThe moon is full in less than two weeks, and heâs looking for every reason to delay this and convince his father that he doesnât want that bond.
âHe wants to be with you, and he canât keep denying it. Iâm sorry, chica.â Meadow seems devastated over her confession, with genuine sympathy in that narrowed brow and glistening eyes.
âWhat?â It overwhelms me, my insides churning in that agonizing way I felt when he and I were apart and silent. Painful tears roll slowly down my cheeks.
It almost winds me as it falls out of my mouth, her face falling sad as a droplet glistens in her eye more obviously.
âJuan has no right to force that on him, but Colton, he needs a shove. He needs to stop obeying everything he commands and fight for his right to choose his mate. The law is on his side in this.
âJuan oversteps his boundaries all the time, and Colton is so used to toeing the line and obeying that he doesnât even think he can question it.â
Her anger simmers below the surface, yet I feel it vibrating from her as it fuels my own.
âJuan is forcing him to mark Carmen before the next full moon, even though theyâre no longer even dating?â Itâs almost a sob as pain slices into my throat and threatens to choke me.
My legs give out, and I stumble to the bed nearby to slump down heavily, stunned by the reality of this. âHe didnât tell me.â
I heave in some air as the tears rack my body, and Meadow comes to perch beside me, running her hand down my hair, trying to console me.
âI think Colton is hoping he can convince him of another way before that time comes, that your gift is enough to show him youâre special,â she soothes quietly.
âJuan will never accept me, even with a special power. Juan hates anything to do with my kind.â
I donât know where it comes from, but a world of pain floods my heart and twists my insides in such an excruciating way I think my heart stops beating.
I canât bear to think about him marking her for all eternity. I donât know what that would do to our bond or how much that would kill me, but suddenly, I can see what she hints at.
She thinks dressing up and looking good will turn his head more than it already is, make him want me more in hopes he will find the will to stand up and claim what is rightfully his.
Maybe it will push his lust buttons enough to force his hand, to mark me in the heat of passion like he almost did that night in the study when the hormones of imprinting were at their strongest.
Colton isnât like that, though, and I donât think flirting and sashaying around in skimpy clothes will alter his commitment to his honor and obedience.
Especially not now that the insane need and hunger have faded to manageable levels. It only stays that strong in the first days to ensure the mark is made.
That first kiss was hormone-fueled after the imprint was so new. Itâs calmer now. The feelings settle in, and the raging lust gives way to a deeper connection. Thatâs how it works.
Itâs meant to make you complete the bond with sex and marking because you canât control the need for each other.
It then fades to love, respect, and taking care of each other, with a less intense appetite for sex. I canât make him lust-crazy like that again and push him to defy his father with some makeup and a pair of booty shorts.
He has way more control than most.
âWe canât fight this. Colton has to be the one, and he is a little preoccupied with vampire wars and changes to everything now,â I point out dejectedly, sighing heavily with my own logic.
âLook, Iâm going to level with you. I donât want that skanky puta becoming a permanent fixture in my sub-pack. I loathe her and have done since Colton brought her in.
âIf sexing you up gets Colton to find his spine and maybe at least delay this somehow, we can find a way to change Juanâs mind together.
âWeâre his pack. And whether the boys agree with this or not, they got his back and mine. Carmen was never one of us.
âI saw what you could do in the hallway, and if that was an ounce of untrained, uncontrolled gift, then thereâs no telling how much power you have inside of you, chica.
âI know about your eyes, and that has to mean something. There are rumors about wolves from a time gone by with special gifts and blood-filled eyes we cannot ignore.â
âIâm not special. Iâm scared and out of my depth,â I admit honestly, taking comfort from her stroke skimming my hair repetitively.
Meadow has a maternal quality, and I think thatâs the feeling pulling me to her. She has the same spirit my mom had, the exact fierce but gentle nature.
She takes no crap and has an aura that tells you sheâs loyal to a fault, bold with her opinions, and with a heart always at the core of her plans. Itâs been missing from my life for so long.
Colton may be the boy to follow his father, but I know heâs trying to find a way to be with me, even after he rejected me. I have a hold over him that runs deep that neither can fight.
If I gave him more, gave him a reason to throw all in, then maybe he would find it inside of himself to defy his father and mark a mate on the full moon that isnât Carmen.
Until now, Iâve let him be the one to keep pulling us together. Maybe thatâs why heâs able to resist. Maybe Meadow has a point.
Iâve been distant, mad at him, and combative. I havenât made any of this easy, and, at times, Iâve pushed him away.
Maybe sheâs right and not in a dress-sexy way, but perhaps I need to strengthen our bond and pull him to me, apply the affection he shows me, and give him a reason to fight for us.
Encourage him.
All I have is how he feels about me, and I know that sex with your fated does something more when you finally come together. Thereâs a second level of imprinting when you unify.
I should aim for that, seduce him, even if Iâm not sure heâll yield, and Meadow isnât sure either.
She doesnât see how hard he tries to keep his hands to himself, and maybe with a push, I can prove us both wrong.
Maybe I can unify my mate and solidify his mindset into marking me, no matter what Juan says.
I belong with him, and my future in this pack, these lands, all rely on getting this out of the way and having him finally unite us.
Juan can go to hell. I need to get Colton to man up. Once thatâs done, his father canât do a damn thing about it, and it canât be undone without killing us both.
His hands will be tied, and then we can focus on the impending war and all that comes with it. This needs to be done.
âShow me how to put these on.â I pick up the scraps of lace and wipe my face with the back of my hand, pulling myself together with some kind of plan, be it haphazard.
As Meadow said, itâs a step to stop hating on him and start encouraging him to find his spine.
Your mate is supposed to help you grow; until now, heâs the only one doing anything like that. Itâs my turn to help Colton find his strengths.
âNow youâre talking. Seduction, chica, is a tried and tested weapon that no man can resist for any length of time when itâs from the woman he already loves.
âIgnore Carmen. Her time has passed, and she broke his trust. She brought shame to our pack when she slept with TJ. Colton can never bond to her.â
I inhale sharply, that name registering as I run through my memory bank and stop on a face to go with it. I know who he is, and I can see why Coltonâs remaining feelings for Carmen died a death.
TJ is Coltonâs first cousin, his direct blood, and was raised as a brother to him, literally. Heâs Juanâs younger brotherâs son, and at twenty-eight, heâs an alpha to another sub-pack.
Heâs always had a subtle sibling rivalry with Colton, and I guess he saw an opportunity for the upper hand. That had to have stung and wounded Colton so profoundly.
I now know why Colton never named and shamed and made their betrayal public.
Juan would never allow him to bring a black mark to his bloodline like that, and his insistence to still mark Carmen as Coltonâs mate is proof heâs trying to act like it didnât happen.
He denies our laws to suit his purpose. He would rather see his son bonded to someone who shamed his pack than see him connected to me.
Screw you, Juan.
If learning to seduce Colton puts him in place to defy him, then Iâm throwing myself in and not coming back out until itâs done.
That boy is mine, and I have all kinds of pull to make him beat to the march of my drum, a strong, loud thrum that will drown out Juanâs tenfold.
Bring it on, Santo.