Chapter 32: The Regret

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I should have stayed with my vampires. No, I should never have been born with this damn power. I obviously wasn’t the right one to have it. I had no idea what to do with it.

The power that came with my voice was so strong, so powerful, it still hummed in my veins, tingled beneath my skin.

I still sensed the packs, the alphas—but it was distant. I couldn’t fine-tune anything, and as much as I thought I had been in control, now I was pretty sure that had been a decorated lie my brain had told so I would keep singing.

I didn’t want to regret using my voice. In the moment, it had been the best feeling ever. And I’d had three alphas—I knew all about how good feelings could get.

But all I had was a voice that scared people and vampires wanted to use.

I couldn’t harness it or use it the way the alphas seemed to be convinced I could.

Sure, it was one hell of a ride when I did use it, but there were always consequences.

I ran through from the ceremony, through the huts, and out the other side to some of the forestry. I made it to a cornfield that edged onto the forest.

I started running into it when strong arms caught around my waist.

I immediately knew the scents.

My alphas.

“Let me go, Zach,” I whispered. He curled me into him instead.

“Never, Little Red.”

The sentiment had my heart in its clutches.

Atticus circled, “Why’d you run, Fox?”

“Because you can’t fight your packs for me. You can’t let me ruin everything you have all built just because I have a powerful voice. I’ve just spent days with all three of you. I’ve seen all of your lives and I love them. I don’t want to be the reason that unravels.”

Dorian pulled my face to look at his, “You are not the reason. Superstition and bias are. But they can be beaten, Sweet Siren.”

“I am poison. I killed my family and I will kill yours too,” I said, the tears falling. I hated that they were, but I couldn’t stop them.

I had been strong my whole life; I’d had to be. But I couldn’t be now.

Not with the alphas staring at me like they were. Like I could somehow make everything okay. But I couldn’t. I was only good at breaking things.

“You will get your ass back to that ceremony, Little Red. My wolves don’t give a shit whether your power is in your voice or not.”

Dorian nodded, “And my pack thinks it is a good thing you have that much power. As much as I wish being strong wasn’t a factor in their acceptance, it is. Now they accept you more than they ever did.”

I shook my head, “But the water pack—”

“Have a few weak links I will cut out. But they do not make up my pack. And they are not the alphas, Fox. They will come around.”

“They shouldn’t have to!” I snapped, backing away from them. “The packs are right to be wary, to hate me. The vampires do. It is something I am used to. I know it is what I deserve, and I won’t force them to accept me.”

Atticus shook his head. “No, Fox. You don’t get it. We want you. We love you, and we want to keep you. All three of us. And we’re the alphas.”

“So?” I sniffled, ignoring the confession from his heart because if I listened to it, I would give in. Giving in to them meant going back and facing the pack.

Even if they accepted me, how could I know they wouldn’t resent me? Or cast me out like Serafina? My mind turned, but then something else clicked—what if I went back and I was the reason that Serafina and even Atticus no longer had to hide?

Dorian smiled. “So. We decide what is and isn’t to be accepted. And we all accepted you a long time ago. At the blood moon ritual. You became ours, voice and all. Now the pack has to get used to that because whether you are here or anywhere else, you are still ours. That won’t change.”

“But I have to choose,” I whispered, hating that the decision pierced us all with pain.

“Not for another few days. And even when you do, Little Red, we will be with you. You’ll always be able to turn to all three of us.”

I sucked in a breath at that revelation. They were okay with me choosing one of them despite wanting them all?

“We know you can’t ever fully give yourself to one of us. Not after spending time with all of us. Not after the way we just linked.”

I looked over my shoulder, toward the packs that had started chattering and laughing again. The celebration continued, and I looked back at my alphas.

“They’re okay?”

Atticus nodded, “They know it means more power for the pack. They have to be okay with it.”

“I don’t want them to hate me for being with any of you. To think I made you be here with me.”

Dorian smirked and came up to me, trampling over the corn maize and making a small clearing that caged us in. “We chose you, Sweet Siren. So the packs have to as well.”

His kiss came in fast, and I leaned into it.

I wanted to believe in his words. In all of them. So with his kiss, I did.

I let them all in. The trust and connection filled me again, just as it had when we were singing.

Zachariah moved into me from behind, untying my dress. I sighed into the kiss with Dorian, his touch even more potent.

The magic between us was alive, buzzing, and beautiful. It was pure seduction, winding through all of us and weaving us together like sewing a stitch.

I sucked in a breath, my head hanging back as the moon glared down at us.

Dorian kissed down my neck, Zachariah on the other side as Atticus got to his knees between my legs.

I gasped as they all pressed their lips on me, the fabric of my dress slipping away.

I was sure talking would be better for coming to terms with everything, and going back to the celebration was probably expected, but I couldn’t tear myself away. Their touch was everything I needed.

Every time we were together, it made everything right. Like when I used my voice—but less terrifying.

I could pretend that we were going to be okay, that the choice I had to make wasn’t going to break us.

So instead of talking, instead of doing anything that I was meant to do, I gave in to the alphas, living in blissful denial a little while longer.

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