There was a soft knock on Austin's bedroom door. It was definitely not his mom, she always just barged in because he hardly ever locked his door. Nicky knew to knock, but it was usually more of a banging noise than it was a knock. That left out one person, his father.
The man knocking on his door at eleven o'clock at night was in no way a good sign. Not that his presence ever was. He was like a dark cloud looming over them, intent on raining on each and every one of their parades. He succeeded a lot in doing that.
Austin got out of bed in a flash, his nerves on alert and his stomach a rumbling mess. He even tripped on himself and managed to knock over a glass of water that was seated on his bedside table, spilling a considerable amount of water all over his pajama pants. That's what he got for not turning on his bedside lamp.
When he finally reached the door, he put his hand on the knob but did not turn it. He needed a second to breathe and collect himself. It was like approaching or running away from an elephant in the wild; Clumsy, sudden movements are always a bad idea because it just spooks them.
Once he was relatively calm and collected he opened it, revealing his father . He was in a robe and had one hand resting against the adjacent wall while the other was in his pocket.
"Why are you not asleep?" His father asked.
Seriously? Austin thought. If he thought he was asleep,why did he come knocking!"I was!"
"I'm assuming you received my message!" Crap! "What time did I say you should be there?"
"Uhh..Four-thirty in the afternoon." Austin stammered.He was seriously thinking about ditching. But Mr. O'Toole seemed like the goody-two-shoes type of person who was definitely going to tattle. Ever since Austin met the guy, he just wanted the kick him back to Ireland.
"Good," his father said, "Don't even think about missing it, you hear me?" It's like the man was reading his thoughts.
"I wasn't," Austin lied.
"If you do, I will know. Then you will be in more trouble than you already are in !" This was escalating quickly. "You're lucky I'm choosing to be conventional with this 'phase' you're in!" He said the word 'phase' as if it burned his tongue and to some extent, Austin wished it actually did.
Conventional? What part of this was conventional! If it wasn't for the fact that his mother was around, his father would not have been above soaking Austin in holy oil and setting him on fire!
"Yes, I'm very lucky."Austin said sarcastically, his father did not catch on to the sarcastic part though.
"Now, I never want to hear anymore of this nonsense about liking other men! You are going to be normal and you're going to get cured by the doctor whether you like it or not. Am I clear?"
"Crystal." Austin said with a monotone.
"Now, go back to sleep. We don't want you sleeping in school tomorrow!"
Austin nodded and quickly shut the door, not bothering to wait for his father to walk away first. His night was officially ruined. Most fathers at least wished their kids a good night every once in a while. Not his though. The man had literally never once wished him a good night -not even when he was a kid. And from recent occurrences, that was not gonna change.
He was about to get back into bed when he noticed the wet patch on his pant leg . It started getting cold due to the fact that he was not wearing a top and the cold water had seeped through, making contact with his sensitive skin.
He pulled off the pants and tossed them into the laundry hamper then proceeded to retrieving a fresh pair from the closet.
As he was about to close the door, something caught his eye. It was the brown, checkered, button up shirt that Noah had given to him. He was immensely appreciative for that. He had no idea there was a sensible person beneath the thick, nettlesome façade.
Since the shirt was used, he would normally have put it in the hamper . But not this one. He kept it safe. He kept it away from the filth of the other dirty clothes. In his head, he had said that it was to keep it from being ruined by being crumbled up with the others -disrespectful to the wonderful gesture Noah had shown. Of course, that was a bunch of bull.
He removed it from the hanger and put it on -it was a little chilly anyway. The scent of the shirt was deliciously manly and as long as he had it wrapped around him, he felt like he did not need a blanket. It was just so warm and snug, and weirdly comforting. He knew he was being weird but no one was around to frown at him so..what the hell!
Soon, he was asleep, snuggling in the cosy shirt, temporarily forgetting what his father has just said. He wanted to keep it forever. It was like a good luck charm of some sort.
****
It was Friday, his favorite day of the week. He got to relax after school and not think about school or even his homework. He always went over to Sam's house and played video games when they did not have a party to go to. Or did anything else that they deemed fun.
This Friday was not a fun one though. He had no idea what to expect once he went to the psychiatrist's office and he spent the whole day anxiously wishing that four o'clock would never come. But that was just a stupid wish.
During last period, he had his eyes glued on the wall clock. It seemed like the second hand was running twice as fast, which was doing a lot of damage to his nerves. Mr. O'Toole did not scare him, he was sure he could handle the man quite easily. His father was the scary factor in the equation -one stupid blabber from O'Toole and his life was as good as over..or worse.
As the last bell rang, everyone walked out, scattering into the hallway. He remained seated . He needed a few seconds to collect his nerves and prepare himself for whatever awaited him. I mean, how hard could it be? If things got weird, he would just run out of there like the devil was on his ass. O'Toole could definitely not outrun him.
He stepped out in the hallway, making sure to steer clear of Noah. He did not need an encounter with the devil's incarnate on his highway to hell to meet the devil. Luckily, Noah was not around, which was suspicious and weird. But that was not his problem. In fact, it was quite a relief not having to fend him off.
He was soon driving out of the school compound. He needed some music to distract him from the thoughts and questions running through his head so he played one of his favorite Indie bands.
ð¶You've taken your words and you take your judgements and stick 'em onto everything. If we don't conform to what you were born into then you run the other way... You say, "now, what's your style and who do you listen to," who cares?....Foster the People sang melodiously over the speakers while he tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, enjoying the serene mood brought forth by the song.
He was interrupted by the incessant ringing of his phone -which was on the passenger seat, so he turned down the music and answered it.
"Where are you ?" Nicky asked.
"Where are you ?" He imitated.
"At school looking for you, shitbrick!" She shouted, making Austin pull the phone away from his ear for a second.
"Why are you looking for me?!" Austin asked, frowning.
"Because I don't wanna walk home, dumbass!"
"Why would you walk home? Where's your boyfriend?"
"He had to go to his dad's office to run an errand. So Lira and Noah took a cab home and I've been looking for you." So that's why he wasn't there to revolve around Austin's head like a swarm of bees!
Annoying...but he had started to get used to it and even arguably fond of it. Although he was never going to admit it to anyone.
"Well, you're gonna have to ride with one of your friends because I'm off to see the shrink."
"Today?"
"No, yesterday!" Austin retorted, "What do you think."
"Why didn't you tell me! Now I'm gonna be late ."
"Late for what?" Austin asked, stopping at a red light.
"I need to pick the perfect outfit for tonight and also get ready before Michael comes to pick me up!"
"Where are you going?"
"I'm going out tonight! " she said in a tone that said 'duuuh'!
"Sorry, I can't help you there little sis."
"This isn't fair . I need my own car!"
"Then ask dad."
"Oh, forget it. You're totally useless. I see Kelly, I'm gonna ride with her. Bye loser!" she hung up.
He tossed the phone back to the passenger seat and waited for the light to turn green. The couple in the car next to his seemed to have gotten bored waiting for the light and were now making out sloppily like a couple of horny squirrels. Soon as it turned he stepped on it and proceeded to his destination. He had fifteen minutes left before the scheduled session started.
Three minutes later, he pulled up to a block that seemed very luxurious and just the sort of place that people like the good doctor practiced their business. It was also very quiet and serene as if no one ever talked here.
Austin parked his car and started making his way up the steps that led to the entrance of the building. He had not noticed Noah standing at the top of the steps until he was almost there. He was just standing there, leaning against the railing with his hands deep in his pockets. On his face was a huge smirk, displaying a dimple. His hair was a tangled mess on his head but he still managed to pull it off perfectly. He looked so sexy posing like that! Shut up, Austin told his subconscious.
"Oh no. I did not accidentally summon you here, did I ?"
"Hello gorgeous! So happy to see you again!" Noah greeted.
"What the fuck are you doing here, Noah?" Austin asked venomously.
"What? Can't a guy decide to take a stroll around a place without having to explain ?"
"No, because this is not a park!" Austin said, "Why are you here?"
"I thought we agreed yesterday that I was accompanying you to your appointment."
"We did not 'agree'. I remember pretty well ignoring you when you mentioned it!"
"Well, I heard you say yes." Noah shrugged.
"How did you even know the address and what time my appointment was?!"
"How many psychiatrists named O'Toole can there be in this town!" Noah stated." And as for the time, I got here early to wait because I knew you would never tell me the correct time."
"You know me so well!" Austin said sarcastically.
"I know. The perfect match made in gay heaven." Noah responded.
"Well, I don't need your presence. Leave!"
"Who turns away moral support?" Noah exclaimed, "Hey, imagine how fun it would be to intimidate the stupid shrink. I saw his picture online, pretty sure we can take him."
"What are you talking about!?" Austin asked, now interested in the idea.
"Dude, why would you just sit there and let him do his hocuspocus on you while you could be doing something more fun like making him squirm!"
"Huh..I never thought there would come a day when I would say this to you but you're absolutely right!"
"Trust me, the days are coming." Noah said.
"Please don't ruin it !" Austin begged.
"At your service, my liege!" Noah said while bowing down in mock surrender.
"Arrgh! Can we just go in and get it over with!" Austin said, "We have eight minutes."
"Good idea, quickies are always a great way to prepare oneself for a meeting, especially this one."
Austin stopped in his tracks, turning right to face Noah, "Can't you last a minute?"
"Whoa! That's just sixty seconds, which is an extremely short time -even for me!"
"I changed my mind, I don't want you here!"
"Then where do you want me?" Noah asked with a wink.
"Leave!" Austin demanded.
"Fine, I'm sorry! I'll try not to upset you. Which is a lot to ask of me considering you keep swinging your hips the way I like." Noah responded in a husky voice that almost made Austin lose his train of thought, briefly taking him back to last night when he had slept wearing Noah's shirt. That had him blushing a little thinking about it in front of said person. He feared that Noah might read his mind and know what he was thinking about.
"Shut up!" He collected himself in time to scream at him. His voice travelled much further than he had anticipated, given the fact that the neighborhood was almost graveyard silent.
"Ok, ok!" Noah caved. "I'll try."
"Not good enough!" Austin said.
"Damn, I hope you're that demanding in bed." Noah said absentmindedly.
"That's it, I'm going up there and if I see you anywhere near me I'm punching you!"
"I didn't mean to say it! It kinda just happened."
"I don't care. Stay away from me!" Austin said and stormed away.
He boarded the elevator and pressed the thirteenth floor button then leaned against the wall. He still hated how his body reacted whenever Noah blurted out one of his stupid innuendoes. He did not need that,especially when he was on his way to get 'cured'.
He actually liked Noah's idea very much and now he felt a little bad for shooing him off so harshly -but only a little bit.
The doors opened and he stepped into a very plush looking corridor; carpeted and the walls adorned with beautiful paintings. Office fourteen D was four doors to the right, with a brown, wooden door. He knocked on it and heard a high female voice shout, "Come in!" He pushed open the door and came face-to-face with a slender-looking brunette with long-ish ,permed hair,who was seated behind a desk.
"Hello, I'm Nancy. How may I help ya!" She asked in a southern accent.
"I'm here for my appointment at four-thirty with Mr. O'Toole."Austin replied.
"Are you Mr. McNamara?"
"Please, call me Austin." He never liked being called Mr. McNamara because that's how most people addressed his father.
"Alright, Austin," she said while giggling. Austin looked at her and cocked an eyebrow, wondering what was up with her. "Follow me this way." She led him to a door that was to her left and opened it, swinging her hips at him.
He entered as she held the door open for him. He turned around to thank her,only to find her blushing furiously at him. "You can wait in there Austin," Her hair kept bouncing around and Austin felt the urge to suggest a blowout. "The doctor will be in shortly. Let me know if you need anything."
"Sure." He offered her a small, polite smile as she hesitantly closed the door. He went over to sit on a cream colored sofa, which matched with nothing else in the room. In fact,the entire room constituted of furniture that clashed painfully with each other. He concluded that the doc. had selected it himself. It was as if he had gone to the dumpster behind IKEA at night and selected anything that could be assembled into useable furniture then proceeded to assemble it himself.
How was anyone supposed to get cured of any mental issues in such a haunting environment! He sure hoped that no one came here to get help for bad dreams at night because this was in itself a nightmare inducer.
It was not long before Mr. O'Toole came in, wiping a handkerchief over his forehead. His face looked a lot redder than Austin remembered it. "Hello, Mr. McNamara!" He greeted.
"Austin." Austin corrected icily.
"Austin, sorry I'm a little late. Sometimes I hold sessions on the roof of the building." O'Toole explained.
Somehow, Austin thought it was actually the clients' idea to do so. No one would want to spend an hour in here trying not to look around.
O'Toole went and sat on a single chair that was opposite of the couch Austin was on, with a folder and pen in hand.
"So Austin, you understand that you need to keep an open mind if we're going to do this." He started.
"Did you perhaps give yourself that advice before coming in here?" Austin asked rudely.
"Austin, this attitude of yours is not advisable for a person in your condition!" He raised his voice.
"And may I suggest, it's not advisable to raise your voice at me like that when we're alone behind closed doors, against my will." Austin replied calmly.
"I apologize for losing my temper." The doc said, bringing his eyes away from Austin's .
"That's better." Austin smirked.
"It's just very frustrating seeing you young people throw your lives away on such trifling unholy matters and not even realizing it. I'm trying to help you."
"What makes you think -" he was cut off by a knock on the door. Before O'Toole could give the person permission to come in, the door swung open revealing an obnoxiously smiling Noah.
"Hi there!" Noah greeted the doctor.
Austin was equal parts relieved to see Noah here and annoyed that he had just brushed off the warning and came anyway.
"And who might you be?" O'Toole asked.
"I'm the Ross to his Rachel." Noah replied, motioning towards Austin with his thumb.
"What?" O'Toole asked, looking a little confused.
"Never mind." Noah said, "I'm his best friend. Here to provide moral support."
"Best friend?" Austin asked.
"I didn't know you were bringing a friend Austin." The doctor said towards Austin.
"Neither did I." Austin responded.
"I'm here to hold his hand during this difficult time and let him know we are behind him every step of the way." Noah said, winking at Austin.
"Alright, you can take a seat. But only speak when spoken to. Understand?" O'Toole warned, not having caught the full meaning behind Noah's sentence.
"Absolutely doc!" Noah answered with a fake smile as he sat almost too close to Austin.
"Good." O'Toole continued, "As I was saying, I need you to tell me why you think you're a homosexual."
"I never actually admitted to being one!" Austin said.
"You need to stop denying it already. Austin, I'm doing this all for you. This situation is not cut and dried just because you say you're not. Clearly, something made you this way and you're here so I can find out why. I must warn you, I'm very thorough at my job and I'm not going to drop the ball on this one."
"Oh, so you're a bigot!" Noah interjected.
"What did you just say?" The doc asked Noah .
"Oh..I called you a prejudicial person intent on imparting his rustic beliefs on everyone who just doesn't care."
"I would advice you to watch your tongue young man or I will throw you out!" His face seemed to be getting redder by the second.
"Noah!" Austin called in a low, reproving tone but in reality, he liked what Noah was doing to the doctor.
"Oooh..watch it there doc! Your face is about to start flaming any minute now." Noah remained calm.
"Out of my office, now!"
"You mean this ugly likeness of a failed beloved Scandinavian store we're all calling an office?" That earned Noah a chuckle from Austin and a death glare from Mr.O'Toole. If looks could kill, Noah would be a puddle of sand on the floor by now.
"Out!"
"Tell me doc, why do you believe so strongly that my boyfriend here did something wrong ?"
"Your what?!" Austin spun around to look at Noah, who simply sent him a wink.
"Excuse me?" The doctor asked ,looking at Austin , " What's going on here Austin. What is he talking about?" He pointed a finger at Noah.
And there goes that rock... And that gay place again!
"Ummnm.. Wh-what do you mean, doc?" He feigned obliviousness.
"What did he mean by saying you're his boyfriend!" The doctor looked extremely boggled .
"Tell him, babe!" Noah urged.
"Uhhhhhh..what he said. Several months now." He said in a very low , sing-songy voice.
"What was all that stuff you were saying the other day about a prank?" The doctor's expression said that he desperately needed it to be actually true.
"I....lied about that..." Austin replied hesitantly. "What did you think doc?" He suddenly found his footing after seeing the disgusted look on the doctor's face. He also looked like he was one step closer to a heart attack.
"I expected the son of such an honorable man as Thomas McNamara would have good values and morals like his father, that he would not involve himself in such wrong, disgusting and cockamamie ways! A man is supposed to be with a woman, and that's -"
"Forgive me doctor but it does not look like you have a woman!" Noah interrupted.
"That's none of your business you little brat!" He said, standing up from his seat and started pacing, still dabbing the handkerchief over his forehead.
"And don't normal therapy sessions usually go a little different than this?" Austin asked Noah, trying to get more reaction out of the doctor.
"But you are not normal!" Uh-oh!
"Easy there doc! You're starting to look a little green." He was starting to look unwell, but that could have been him getting too bigoty.
"Your father is going to hear about this, Austin. Better be damn sure of that!"
"You mean this?" It didn't take even a second before Austin found Noah's lips suddenly against his.
He was so shocked he literally couldn't move. He just remained frozen and gave Noah the widest stare he could. Noah's lips were as soft as they looked -maybe even softer. It was several seconds before he realized that he had closed his eyes and was frantically kissing Noah back. He had been so caught up in a frenzy that he was metaphorically in outer space.
Noah could not believe what he was doing. He expected Austin to scream and run for the hills but what was happening right now was even more confusing. The feeling of kissing Austin was a strange one -nothing he had ever experienced before with the countless guys he had been with. He couldn't quite put a finger or a name to it and that was very scary. He did not seem to be able to stop though.
The gasps from Mr. O'Toole brought them both back to planet earth. Austin pulled away and jumped to the furthest end of the couch, looking absolutely mortified. The almost inaudible cries from Mr. O'Toole had them both turning their attention to him and as soon as they did, he fell to the ground, still holding onto his chest.
"Oh no!" Noah exclaimed as he rushed from the sofa to tend to the doctor.
"What's happening?" Austin asked as he kneeled next to Noah.
"He's having a heart attack! Call an ambulance!" He yelled.
Austin retrieved his phone and called the medics in a panic while the doctor squirmed on the floor, Noah still trying to keep him stable till they arrived.
*********************************
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