"Hey mom!"
"Hey baby, I'll be home soon to cook dinner. Are you ok?"
"Mom, could you please come to the St. Paul's Hospital... now?"
"What!" She sounded panicky . "Why?What happened sweetie?"
"I'll tell you when you get here." Austin said. "Please hurry!"
"Please tell me you're ok !"
"I'm fine, mom." Austin insisted.
"I'll be there in twenty. Just hold on!" she said before he hung up.
The bustle in the hospital was too much. There were sick people being wheeled around, others walking around while others lay in their wards, releasing whatever germs they had to the air with their hefty heaving and coughing.
Doctors and nurses moved from ward to ward, tending to overly needy patients. He wondered how they kept their cool doing this everyday. Either they were really nice people or they didn't have a choice. Austin was not a fan of sick people. They seemed to need everything and it was somehow rude and insensitive to protest.
The floors reeked of bleach and disinfectant but Austin highly doubted it did the trick. The patients of all ages; some very recently born, some probably looking to lie in their deathbeds , were literally everywhere. Every once in a while, one of them threw up in a potted plant or on the just washed floors. Disgusting much?
Austin paced, every once in a while stealing glances at the door through which they had taken the doctor. It still seemed so surreal that this was happening. How did the guy even reach the point of a heart attack? One minute the man is talking just fine, the next he is sprawled on the floor with his heart about to give in.
He was freaking out so much because he would blame himself for sure if the doctor's condition changed for the worse...or the worst.
"Can you stop pacing so much?" Nicky, who was seated at the opposite side of the waiting room, asked. "You're starting to give me anxiety and I don't even know the guy."
"Well, forgive me if I'm freaking out over the fact that we almost killed someone." Austin retorted.
"Technically, you didn't ."
"And technically, you need to shut up!"
"I'm not here for you anyway."
"Then why the fuck are you here?"
"Noah called me so I'm here for him."
He refused to look towards Noah though. They had not said another word to each other after the ambulance arrived. Nancy had ridden in the back of the ambulance while Austin drove with Noah following it. The entire car ride had been pin-drop silent and that had been a relief.
The awkwardness in the air was so thick, you could carve it like a thanksgiving turkey. No one could look at the other -it was like they were now repelling against each other like magnets.
Even when they got to the hospital, as they waited in the waiting room, they made sure to stay as far away from each other as possible. Austin did most of the repelling. He needed his mind to concentrate on the matter at hand but he kept flashbacking to the moment before the unexpected heart attack.
A tall man in scrubs and a white lab coat came out of the E.R., simultaneously removing the white rubber gloves as he approached the bunch. Nicky and Noah stood up from their positions as he neared.
"Who did you say you were?" The doctor asked.
"Patients of his." Austin answered.
"So, does that mean you were present right before he had the heart attack?" He asked directly at Austin. Before the heart attack. Austin had trouble thinking about the before part.
"Yes." Noah responded instead.
"The three of you were having a session together?" The doctor asked, a little perplexed.
"No, just him and I." Noah corrected. Him and I . Austin did not like that phrase in a moment like this.
"Uh-huh...so, what was Mr. O'Toole doing right before he had the attack?"
"He was quite agitated and was sweating a lot." Austin said
"Did you do anything to provoke him?"
"Nothing." Austin said suddenly.
"Except bat for the other team!" Noah interjected.
"What?" The doctor asked.
"Nothing." Austin said. "So, is he gonna be ok?"
"His condition is pretty critical and he does not seem to be responding well."
"Doesn't he have family that you can call and have them come here ?" Nicky asked.
"We can't trace his family." The doc responded. "From what we can tell, he has none. At least not in this country."
"Is there a chance he is going to get better?"Â Austin deeply disliked the man ,but that did not mean he wished him dead. He felt guilty because of what was happening. He just wanted him to disappear -but not mortally.
"It's hard to tell at this point. His medical records indicate that he has a history with heart attack so it's pretty much touch and go. But we're doing the best we can. Now, if you'll excuse me..." He said as he walked away to talk to a nurse at the reception desk.
"That's tough.." Nicky said.
"Really? I didn't notice!" Austin replied sarcastically.
"I mean, no family?" Nicky continued -she was used to Austin's sarcasm by now. "What would they do if he died? Do they just stick him in the ground or something?"
"Hey, he is not dying!" Austin said curtly.
"Oh my babies! Thank god you're both ok!" And in no time, they were both engulfed in their mother's embrace .
"Hey mom!" They both said in unison.
"I was really worried when you called!" The woman had come running like crazy !
"I just really needed you mom!" Austin said, burying his face in her hair.
"Wait," she started as she pulled away from the embrace. "If you're both ok, why are you here? Is Sam ok?" She loved Sam as if he were her own son. That's why she was on the verge of freaking out.
"No, mom," Austin responded quickly. "It's not that."
"Then what? Did you hit someone with your car -"
"No!" Both Austin and Nicky cut her off.
"Will somebody please tell me what's going on here!" She clearly was not a fan of the guessing game.
"It's ...ummmnnn.." He hadn't really formulated a good way to break it to her that he was apparently seeing a therapist.
"It's a long story." Nicky tried to help.
"I have time!" Their mother crossed her arms and shifted her weight to her left hip as she looked between her kids, willing one of them to start talking.
"It's my..uhhhh..my...therapist in there ." He stammered.
"Come again?" She asked, creasing her forehead as if she had heard wrong.
"My shrink is in there." Austin said in a what-the-hell kind of way.
"Uhh, no, he isn't!" Their mother said matter-of-factly.
"Yes, he is. Right through there." Austin said.
"Sweetie, you don't have a therapist!" She spoke to him like he was a baby who could not comprehend much.
"Actually, I do."
"Since when!" She demanded, looking a little lost.
"Oh boy!" Nicky exclaimed as she took a step back, trying to put some distance between her and the awkward situation.
"I was hoping dad was gonna tell you about it."
"What does your father have to do with this?" She asked, her arms now on her hips.
"Everything?" He posed it as a question.
"If you don't tell me what's going on right now, you'll be sleeping in that aquarium tonight!" She gestured toward the hospital aquarium seated atop a relatively large table.
"So," he started immediately, not wanting that to happen at all. "Dad brought home a shrink the other day after I told you I was gay. They told me I had some kind of 'disease' that needed to be cured because I'm not normal, then forced me to go to therapy or I was gonna regret it. My first appointment was today and the doc had a heart attack when Noah and I were in his office during session so we called the paramedics and here we are!" He had spoken so fast that he had to take in a huge gulp of air when he was done.
Their mother looked shocked beyond words. She just simply stared at her son, as if she really hoped he would yell, "Surprise! You're on candid camera!" When that didn't happen, she started pacing around.
"No," she said. "I cannot believe this is happening."
"Mom, where is he?" Nicky asked, treading lightly because the woman was about to explode.
"Where is who?" She asked absentmindedly.
"Dad." Austin answered.
"He travelled out of town this morning on business." She responded. "And if he knows what's good for him -or if he values his life at all, he will stay there for good!" She was losing her cool.
"Please calm down mom." Austin pleaded.
"No!" She screamed. "Nobody. And I mean nobody does that to my baby!" She said angrily while pointing her finger. "Nobody calls my baby crazy ..or abnormal for being who he is. I don't care if it is your father, still, he has no right whatsoever to do that -especially behind my back! I swear I've had enough of that man, and I can't take it anymore!"
"What are you talking about?" Austin asked, now alarmed by what she just said.
"Why didn't you tell me ?" She asked, searching his eyes for an answer.
"I'm a big boy mom, I can handle it. It's ok, I'm used to it anyway," he terribly tried to lighten the situation. "Besides, I expected him to tell you himself."
"You know he doesn't have a pair!" It sounded like a joke but her face said it was anything but. "Come 'ere baby!" She pulled him into a motherly hug and Austin thanked god in his head for his mom. He felt so lucky to have her in his life, considering the monstrous father he had.
"Love you mom!"
"Love you too sweetie ." She said as she pulled away from the hug. "Alright, come on Nicole, let's get you both home ...and who's your friend?" She was now noticing Noah .
"This is Noah." Nicky responded.
"Hi ma'am, nice to meet you!" Noah greeted.
"Please, call me Allison." She said. "Ma'am makes me feel a hundred years old."
"Funny, I thought that was your age!" Nicky said.
"Yea, well, learn how to count. It's paid for." Mrs. McNamara told her daughter.
"Ok...Allison ," Noah emphasized. "May I say, what a stunning lady you are! I could have easily mistaken you for Austin's sister!" Noah smiled mischievously as he kissed the back of Austin's mom's hand, one hand behind his back as if he was trying to look like a poorly dressed English butler.
"Really, that's the best you could come up with?" Austin asked in an bored tone.
"Oh, a gentleman! How refreshing!" Mrs. McNamara said, blushing, ignoring Austin's comment.
"We are a rare breed."
"You can say that again!" She continued.
"We?!" Austin asked incredulously.
"Are you Austin's boyfriend?"
"No!" Austin did not hesitate.
"I could be," Noah said. "But he keeps kissing me and ditching me!" So...awkward was over and it was back to annoying!
"Austin! That's not very nice of you !" His mother reprimanded.
"Ok, first of all, I didn't kiss him!" Austin got defensive. "He's the one who stuck his tongue down my throat without permission. Probably why the doctor almost died!"
"Excuse me..." A voice came from behind them.
"Doctor!" Austin called. "Any progress?" Everyone shifted their attention to the doctor.
"I'm sorry to inform you that... Mr. O'Toole did not make it. His heart stopped and we tried to jumpstart it to no avail. He died seven minutes ago."
Time seemed to have stopped and Austin's face went pale. How did that even happen! I mean, a little while ago he was just some excruciatingly annoying bigot with a ridiculous mission to rid the world of homosexuality -whom they had used as a chew toy...and now he was just a dead guy!
Austin felt responsible to some extent.
"That's terrible ." Mrs. McNamara said, "Where's his family though?"
"None we know of." responded the doctor. "Excuse me."
"Well, that is awful." Their mother said, "How about I take you kids out to dinner instead."
"You couldn't just stay away for five fucking minutes!" Austin said, his rage directed at Noah. "You just had to meddle in something that had absolutely nothing to do with you!"
"What are you talking about?" Noah asked.
"What is it with you that you can't mind your own fucking business." Austin continued.
"Austin, what's up with you !?" Nicky asked, puzzled by Austin's outburst.
"Excuse me," a nurse approached them. "I'm gonna need you to be quiet or take it outside, please."
"Stay the fuck away from me!" Austin warned and stormed outside, going to the yard where patients were taking in the last warmth of the sun before it set.
He heard footsteps of someone running behind him and he really hoped that it was just someone taking a jog around the yard.
"Austin!" No such luck!
"I wanna be left alone!" He said without turning around.
"Seriously, what's going on?" Nicky asked with concern for her brother.
"What's going on is, you don't seem to hear me when I say leave me alone!" He turned to look at her.
"Are you ok?" She wasn't about to cave in so easily when she could clearly see that something was eating away at her brother.
"Yea...I'm just standing here, fart'n rainbows!"
"Can you please stop! I know there's something-"
"Austin!" Noah appeared.
"Here you go again." Austin said, "Why am I still surprised, huh? Why!" He screamed.
"Nicky, could you please excuse us?" Noah asked. "Your mom is waiting in the parking lot."
"Ummmnnn.. Sure, I think. Be careful." She warned both of them before leaving.
"Why are you mad at me?" Noah asked, searching Austin's face for any clue. None.
"I need you to stay away from me, got it?" Austin started, "Don't come near me, don't touch me..don't even look my way! You think you can manage that.. Or are you gonna play deaf once again!"
"Can you at least tell me why?" Noah asked. He had a feeling he had really screwed up this time because Austin seemed so mad, there was a vein showing on his forehead.
"Weren't you listening when the doc said there was a dead man in the E.R.!"
"Yea, so?"
"You really are very dumb, aren't you!"
"Ok, can you stop insulting me for one second and tell me just what the hell is going on!" Noah shouted.
"It's your fault!" Austin finally said.
And for the second time today -first time being the moment after he had kissed Austin, he did not know what to say or do. He finally understood why Austin was acting the way he was. "What?" He asked lowly, finally finding is voice.
"Yea! Why the fuck did you come in to the office! If it weren't for you and your stupid macho attitude, we wouldn't be in this situation. For fuck's sake Noah ,we killed someone!" He may have said that an octave too high and some people around turned their attention to them, now interested in their odd conversation.
"Again, what!"
"You can't even grasp that!" He was now being careful, whisper-yelling so that he could make a point to Noah and still keep their conversation a little private. "Maybe, if you had listened to me for once, that guy could be alive!"
"I'm ... I'm sorry, ok?" Austin didn't see that coming. He was partly hoping that Noah would try denying it and pass it off as an accident.
"What?!"
"I said I'm sorry! " Noah screamed. "I'm sorry! I didn't mean for it to happen but I guess that's what I am. A fucking pile of bad luck! Everyone around me just has to fucking die. And I guess I brought it upon you when I hung around you too much. I agree, it's my fault. I accept that fact! I'm really sorry Austin...forgive me, ok? ...or don't -god knows I deserve it." His voice was breaking up by the second and his eyes were shimmering from floating tears. "Don't worry, I'm gonna do my best to stay away from you from now on! I don't ever wanna hurt you again..goodbye."
Austin was tongue-tied. He did not understand what Noah meant by 'everyone around him dies' ..and he was afraid to ask. He also felt like a really awful person for blaming him, considering it seemed to be a sore spot for Noah.
Just what in the hell had happened in Noah's past? Why did he seem all broken up so much, even to the point of tears? Why did he never talk about his family? And why did he move here away from them?
He needed answers but he didn't know where to start, considering he had just warded Noah off -probably for good.
!