I want to stop myself from walking away from Aaron but I can't. As soon as I turn around I take my first step away from him and our friendship. And just like that I was free from Aaron and the crazy things he's doing to my heart.
Or so I thought.
As I'm walking I feel a weight pulling me back and two arms holding me closer as my back hits a chest.
Aaron is holding me; hugging me.
For a second I just stay in his embrace but once it hits me what he'd doing I try to push him away.
"Get off of me Aaron."
"No."
"Aaron," I say.
"I know you're mad right now. I know you think I'm a phony and someone that you can't count on. I know I let you down. And I know you probably don't think you matter to me. But you're wrong. I like you too much to just let you slip away. I just...I just can't let you go."
"Aaron," I warn again, this time my voice quieter than before.
"Please," he says, "please just forgive me. Please. I'm not letting go of you until you tell me how to fix this. Just tell me what to do so that you don't walk away. Please Lux, I'm sorry."
He holds me tighter and I can feel his heart beating fast as his chest hits my back. And as I feel like my heart breaks.
"Okay," I say and his arms go loose.
"Okay? Really?"
I turn myself around within his loose hold and look at him but immediately look away, suddenly feeling ashamed for bringing out his vulnerability.
"Just give me time though," I say.
"Yeah. Definitely. As much time as you need," he says.
"Okay," I say push myself out of his hold. "I just need a little time and we'll be fine."
"You promise?"
"Of course."
-=-=-=-
Aaron did give me time. All the time I needed. He never pushed to hang out with me as much as he used to. Whenever we'd see each other in the hallways we'd smile at each other and whenever we'd see each other outside of school we'd briefly talk. It was not the space I'd expect him to give me. In fact it was more space than I wanted. I would be lying if I didn't say that anytime we'd bump into each other and we'd go our separate ways, I would turn around and watch him go, hoping that maybe, just maybe, he'd turn around too. That he would walk up to me and tell me that he's sick of giving me space and that we should go back to normal-but now I've become so unsure of what exactly is normal. I mean after all, only just a couple months ago the thought of Aaron reeves pushed me to the edge of annoyance. But now, as the weeks have gone by without Aaron and the weather has gone from warm to cold I realize that there was no normal. The days before Aaron are hard to remember and the days with him I try to remember but as time has gone by only snippets of our time together come every now and then.
It was Monday, December fourth to be exact. A little more than a month since the wedding. And the last week of school. It was a tradition at Fort Colons High School to dress accordingly to the Christmas Spirit Week schedule. I wasn't much of a person to dress up for ridiculous school events but Nat wanted us to match on Christmas Colors & Hats Day. I looked like I had just come out from the Mean Girls movie; the scene in which the girls sing to Jingle Bell rock and eventually Gretchen kicks Jason in the face with a radio. Of course the red Santa dress wasn't as short and I decided my ankle black boots justified my outfit. When I reached my locker Nat met up with me, a sort of giddy holiday spirit had hit her and she excitedly put the Santa hat she had promised to bring for Maru and me on my head.
"I am so excited for today," says Nat and she jumped up and down excitedly, her natural dark brown curls bouncing with her.
I playfully roll my eyes and we link arms together as we begin to walk to class. As we're walking I catch the glimpse of an all-too-familiar smug face to which belonged to Aaron Reeves. I couldn't help but let out a small chuckle as I got the full view of all his glory. And only seconds after Omar walks behind him, a big smile on his face, as he hurriedly walks to catch up with Aaron.
Aaron and I lock eyes for a moment and we smile, acknowledging both of our outfits. Mine with my red dress and Santa hat and his with his red and green stripped outfit and an Elves hat on. Only Omar would be the only that would get the Aaron Reeves to wear such a thing.
The day goes on and although I did see Aaron in the hallway in the morning I couldn't help but look for him again anytime the bell would ring and I would walk to my next class. In lunch my eyes went around the cafeteria, looking around for the tall boy with an elves costume but alas I didn't find the right elf.
By the end of the day Nat is already talking about her outfit for tomorrow, Ugly Sweater Day, and I listen as she explains exactly what her sweater looks like.
"Can't wait to see it," I tell her and she smiles and takes her separate way as she walks to her car. I continue to walk until I reach my own car and am surprised when I see a familiar boy.
"What are you doing here?"
Eric smiles and takes in my outfit, raising his eyebrow approvingly to which I roll my eyes at.
"Am I not allowed on Colons property," he questions teasingly.
"Go back to Greymoor," I say and we laugh afterwards.
"What are you actually doing here," I add.
"Well I've got some news."
"Did you get a girl pregnant?"
Eric glares at me and I can't help but let out a laugh.
"So?"
"How do you feel about burgers?"
"Why do you ask?"
"Well my dad is owner of a diner with great burgers and I can get us some for free."
"I don't know-"
"Oh come on, please? I know the reason why you don't want to go to the diner but I swear my dad doesn't think you stole the money. In fact the other day he was talking about you."
"About me?"
"Of course, you were one of the best employees. He doesn't know what he missed out on the moment he fired you. Well actually, he does now. So what do you say?"
"Well," I begin.
"Okay let's go, follow me," he says before walking toward his car.
I let out a defeated sigh and get inside my car before following Eric to the diner,
When we get there I am greeted by my old coworkers, which surprisingly don't all believe the reason behind as to why I was fired. Instead they greet me with smiles and some even go as far as giving me a hug,
Eric and I sit in a booth and orders us some burgers. When the burgers come out we eat and talk, Eric avoiding the main thing he wanted to tell me until after ordering some milkshakes.
"Okay," I say once I'm halfway through my vanilla milkshake, "tell me what's up."
Eric smiles widely and sits back comfortably.
"Guess who got into U of A," he says calmly.
I jump up in excitement and smile back at him.
"No freaking way, you got in?"
"Yes," he says, "just got the letter yesterday."
"I'm so happy for you," I say and get up from my seat and I pull Eric in a hug.
"Thanks Lux," he says holding me tighter, "you have no idea how excited I am."
"Lux?" a voice behind me calls.
I pull away from Eric's hold and find Aaron, Omar, SoHo and Bianca standing behind me,
"Aaron," I say and suddenly I begin to panic. I move farther away from Eric and stand awkwardly in front of them.
"Hi," I add and this time look at each and every one of them, in hopes that that would ease the tension, and it does, but only slightly.
"Hey," Aaron says and he looks between Eric and me before briefly smiling at us and introducing himself to Eric.
"Hey I'm Aaron," he says, "These are my friends Omar, SoHo and Bianca."
"Nice to meet you guys," replies Eric and he smiles at them.
"Do you guys want to join us?" asks Eric.
"No," Aaron and I simultaneously say while Omar on the other hand replies excitedly with a yes.
"It's alright," adds Aaron, "I don't think we all fit in the booth."
"Sure we can, we can just bring extra chairs," says Omar.
Aaron shoots Omar a look.
"Yeah," Eric says, "if you want I'll sit on one of the chairs so you guys can be more comfortable."
"Its fine Eric, I'm sure they want to sit somewhere else," I tell him.
Aaron gives me a look, one I can quite understand before he shakes his head.
"Actually," he says, "the booth looks fine. I'll also sit on the other chair."
I give Aaron a questioning look but he ignores it before grabbing a chair from one of the tables and moving it over to the booth. Eric does the same and they sit. I watch as SoHo moves over to the booth and Bianca follows along and they sit while Omar sits on the other side.
"Aren't you going to sit?" asks Eric.
"I have a lot of homework and-"
"It's only five-thirty, I'm pretty sure you have time. Sit," says Aaron as he motions his hand to the spot between him and Omar on the booth seat. I let out a sigh and clench my jaw as I make my way over and sit between the two of them.
"Order's on the house," says Eric.
"Hell yeah," says Omar beside me.
"Thanks," Aaron says beside him.
"No problem, let me go get a waitress for you guys."
When Eric leaves Omar flicks my shoulder.
"Ow what the hell Omar."
"Why didn't you tell us you had a hookup here? Do you know how many times Aaron has dragged us here for the past couple of weeks and we had to pay. What time do you normally come so we can start coming with you."
"I don't have a hookup," I say and flick him back, "I also don't come here that often, at least not anymore, it was just this one time."
"Cause of your boy over there?" says Omar and he wiggles his eyebrows at me.
I let out an uncomfortable cough. "He's not my boy," I tell him, "we're just friends."
"Oh well he must like you a lot if he's willing to give us our food for free."
"Yeah," says Aaron and I turn my head to look at him.
"We're just friends," I say again, but this time I said it for an entirely different reason. It wasn't to shut up Omar but instead it was directly for Aaron.
I wonder if he understood.
Maybe.
Hopefully.
Hello friends
Here's an update with a few cliche moments lol
Hope you're not disappointed with the way things are going.
Also idk maybe listen to the songs lmao I think they're pretty good and I kinda try to tie it into the mood
Anyways until next time
Love you guys always,
Ari