Chapter 21: chapter 21

Love. The word reverberated in Amey’s mind like a haunting melody. As he stared at the ceiling in the dim light of their bedroom, Anushri's confession replayed over and over. Her soft voice, steady yet filled with emotion, carried an honesty he couldn’t ignore.But instead of feeling joy, warmth, or even relief, Amey felt a deep sense of unease.Love was a promise he had once believed in. He had given himself to it wholeheartedly, only to watch it crumble before his eyes. It had left scars, deep and jagged, that no time or tenderness could heal. Anushri’s words threatened to reopen those wounds, and he wasn’t sure if he had the strength to survive it again.He turned onto his side, his gaze falling on her sleeping form. Her face, serene and peaceful, was illuminated by the faint glow of the streetlight filtering through the curtains. She looked content, almost as if baring her heart to him had lightened her soul.But for him, it felt like an unbearable weight.Amey sat up, running a hand through his hair. The room felt stifling, his thoughts louder than the silence around him. He stood and walked toward the window, pushing it open to let the cool night air soothe his restless mind.“She deserves better,” he murmured to himself, his voice barely audible.Anushri’s words had been filled with a love he didn’t think he deserved. She saw him as strong, kind, thoughtful—qualities he barely recognized in himself anymore. Her hope, her determination to wait for him, terrified him.He gripped the windowsill tightly, his knuckles turning white. “Why can’t she see? Love isn’t for me. It never was. It never will be.”He thought back to his past, the days when he had believed in fairy tales and happily-ever-afters. Back then, he had dreamed of a future filled with love and laughter. But dreams had a cruel way of shattering, leaving only jagged pieces behind.His previous relationship had taught him that love was fragile, conditional, and fleeting. He had given everything, only to be abandoned. The memory of those days, the suffocating pain of rejection, had built the walls around his heart. They were his armor, his fortress—and Anushri was trying to break through them.Amey leaned against the wall, closing his eyes. He didn’t want to hurt her, but he couldn’t let her in. Letting her in meant opening himself to the possibility of loss, pain, and betrayal.“What if I fail her?” he whispered. “What if I can’t be the man she needs?”Her declaration of love had ignited a flicker of hope in him, but hope was dangerous. It had the power to destroy him if it didn’t last. He had convinced himself long ago that he was better off without love, without the vulnerability it demanded.Yet, there was something about Anushri—her strength, her quiet resolve—that unsettled him. She wasn’t demanding or impatient. She didn’t try to force her way past his defenses. Instead, she simply waited, her presence a steady reminder that maybe, just maybe, love wasn’t as impossible as he believed.Amey sighed deeply, his breath visible in the chilly night air. He couldn’t afford to entertain such thoughts. He had to protect himself—and her—from the heartbreak he was certain would follow.Walking back to the bed, he glanced at her one last time. “You’ll see, Anushri,” he murmured. “It’s better this way. It’s better if you don’t love me.”But even as he lay down, his mind betrayed him. Her words lingered, soft and unwavering, challenging the beliefs he had clung to for so long.For the first time in years, Amey felt the faintest crack in his armor. But he didn’t know if he could let it grow—or if he even wanted to.