Chapter 45: chapter 45

Nidhi's POVNext day, when  I woke up he was still sleeping.. I used to  wait for  days to get his glance, but now I can see him  everyday.I can admire him at least when he is asleep..A smile appeared on my lips to this thought... when I saw him moving .. I got scared  and ran into the bathroom, took a shower, came out and walked towards Avani's room. my cute darling was still sleeping peacefully..I walked downstairs and saw  Kabir's mom working in the kitchen."Good morning mom", I greeted.."Good Morning beta, you woke up so early..""Yes mom", I took a chopping pad and started cutting the vegetables..When  the cooking was done, I saw the nanny bringing Avani downstairs..I took my cutie pie into my arms and started feeding her breakfast.I didn't know when he came .When I lifted my head I saw him looking at me. My eyes met with him and I felt like my heart stopped beating..He averted his gaze and sat in front of me.. He had his breakfast and was about to leave when Avani ran to him and gave her hands asking him to lift her..He took her into her arms , wiped her mouth with a tissue ,kissed her on her cheek and gave her to the nanny..I was imagining myself in place of Avani.. I wish for the day, he will hold me in his arms and kiss me before leaving to Office.I was literally day dreaming. "Nidhi ,What are you thinking?? "my mother in law's voice broke my thoughts."Nothing mom.. ", I tried to cover up.I saw him leaving the house..I don't know when he will return.My mother-in-law took my hands in hers and said, "did he speak to you yesterday??"I nodded as No..She sighed and said, "I want you two to be together forever Nidhi.. I pray to god everyday to change his mind.."I smiled and said," one day he will mom"Days passed and there was no change in his behaviour. The confidence that I had in me slowly started dissipating..One day, Kabir's mom came to me and said, she and my father-in-law are going to another town to attend a function.. they will come after a few days.. and to my surprise she said she is even taking Avani with them..I panicked when I heard her, because I will  be left all alone in this house without them..He never talks and   I don't want to go to my parent's house to show my dissatisfaction..I don't want to look weak in front of them..I was almost in tears when I heard they are leaving today evening..Seeing me in tears , Kabir's mom took my hands and said," Nidhi , I have already spoken to Kabir about our trip and even told him to stay with you for these days at home so that you don't feel alone.. and you know what !!!he agreed..""Did he really agree ? ""Yes ,he did.. ",take the opportunity to talk to him.. I nodded happily..In the evening, Kabir's parents left.. Kabir went to the airport with them..I was trying to prepare myself on how to  initiate the talk..I heard my phone ring, it was from Kabir, this is the first time he is calling me after our marriage..and it will be  my first time talking to him..My hands were shaking to lift the call..I gulped my saliva  and slowly said "hello".There was silence at the other end for 2 seconds." Hello", Nidhi said, controlling her excitement."Hi , I have a meeting to attend in the office , I will come back  by dinner time.. I am sorry I promised mom to work from home but this is something important ,I hope you understand""Yeah, it's absolutely fine, you please carry on", I replied.. He said thank you and disconnected the call..I was on  cloud nine after talking to him.. I really pinched myself to check if I am not dreaming..I  started waiting for him.. I looked at myself in the mirror more than 100 times to check if I am looking good.. When I heard the knock on the door, I ran towards it, controlled my breathing and opened the door.He stood in his usual way, and walked inside..I followed him and he straight away went to the bedroom  to take a shower..I sat on the dining table waiting for him.. and  he came down in his night wear..As usual he didn't look at me and I felt a little disappointed.He sat on the table and I served him food. He ate without a word from his mouth.. I made all his favourite food today , he didn't even acknowledge me."Nidhi, you are expecting too much just because of a single call..No Nidhi, don't expect and don't get hurt", I said to myself and ate my dinner in silence.After dinner ,he went to his study and I went into the kitchen to put leftovers in the fridge.Maybe because of expectations l felt low.lost in my thoughts ,I walked towards my bedroom.While changing into my night wear, I looked at myself in  the mirror with tears in my eyes...."Nidhi you looked into the mirror correcting yourself for more than 100 times and he didn't even give  you a glance".  I felt like the mirror was mocking me.. I was Angry, I was in pain..I didn't care  about my looks anymore. I tied my hair into the bun and walked towards the balcony expecting the fresh air to calm down my emotions..**********Kabir's POVMom said they are leaving today for a function and will be back only after a few days.."Nidhi will be alone in this big house, and she may even feel bored ,so why don't you work from home for these few days ", Mom advised.I thought for a while and agreed because I was even thinking of talking to her someday about our marriage.. Firstly I agreed to marry her hoping I will love her one day, but my heart was filled with Nandini and I was not able to accept Nidhi wholeheartedly..it will be injustice to her if I lock her up  in this marriage.She might have gotten carried away from my mom's sobbing.I can't be selfish to destroy her life for my daughter..I wanted to explain things to her so that she can divorce me and get married to someone who will love her wholeheartedly...I had a business call to attend today, so I called her to say I will be  back home by dinner. I felt she was excited to hear me..Am I giving her unnecessary hopes?I regretted calling her. When I reached home I saw her  glowing face  and she was even  dressed up neatly..I didn't want to look at her, I didn't want her to have any feelings for me.. it will be difficult for her to divorce me later..I saw all my favourites on the dining table but I zipped my mouth.. While eating I looked at her once, her head was hung low and she was eating quietly,  disappointment  written all over her face.. I quickly finished my dinner and left to study room..I couldn't concentrate on my work.. My heart was in a mess.It was late at night  ,so I thought she might have slept and walked towards my bedroom.To my surprise, she was not on the couch nor in the bathroom.I realised she was standing on the balcony.. Without my knowledge, my legs walked towards the balcony door..I stood behind her, I don't know for how long  from the back.. The hair which was neatly curled down earlier was tied up into a bun.I heard a squeaky sound in her nose. Wait, is she crying?? my heart ached for her... "is she crying for me.."