Chapter 52
" If it doesn't have the middle name Ivan, I'll send the thing to a dog shelter. "
Rochelle Quinn's POV:
I have spent so damn long trying to forget just a few experiences I faced as a child.
My demons were dead. So why did I still feel like this?
I realized that I haven't faced all of my demons.
So I stood at the old meeting spot, in the centre of my territory. And waited.
"You know, I didn't believe them when they told me that there was no saving you. The Kings were rotten through and through." Quietly, I leaned back onto the brick wall with my gaze fixated on the floor.
I could feel his presence before I saw his feet. Killian King always had an effect on me. It was almost like my body craved his touch.
It was only now that I realized the craving linked back to the childhood trauma his family put me through, and the fact his touch was the only thing I found comfort in during that dark time.
"There was a time when I thought I loved you, and I tried to ignore it but it didn't work." I commented idly, finally looking up to meet his tormented eyes. "Why don't you tell me the truth?"
The forest was burning down.
"The truth is....I....I never loved you. I told you not to get too close to me." He bit his lip, his internal pain breaking through his usually emotionless exterior. "I hurt people, Roche-Rocky. It's all I'm good at."
"I wanted so badly to think you were different. That you could be saved." I admitted, wrapping my arms across myself. I ignored his words. "I was wrong."
I kept his stare, without faltering my own. I wouldn't let his gaze break me anymore. "None of what we had was ever real, was it?"
He shook his head, but didn't say anything.
"You planned this all from the beginning?"
He nodded his head slowly, refusing to comment once again.
"Why me, Kill? Of all people, why me?" I continued when he didn't reply instantly, "I deserve closure with all of this, Killian. You owe me that as least."
He swallowed, a single tear decorating his cheek. "Royal thought you was an easy target."
I raised my brows, "Because I'm a girl?"
"No." He shook his head, glancing to the floor in shame. "He once told you that you had the potential to kill him. You had this anger in you that was obvious, and then he noticed that you started to trust me. I was always softer than the others, but I have loyalty tattooed into me. Royal asked me to use my friendship with you to find out things about the Diamonds, he didn't realise that you and I were more similar than we cared to admit. I have loyalty tattooed into my blood; You have loyalty combined into your blood."
"Did you ever care about me?" I questioned, trying to comprehend all the words he was saying.
He wouldn't look at me, "I cared about how you could benefit my family."
I nodded my head, ignoring the way my stomach turned at his words.
"One day you'll wake up and realize that what you did was wrong and you could've had a chance. I was worth every second of the fight. "
I left Killian King alone, in the middle of Diamond territory, without looking back and with one thing on my mind.
Killian was always a shit liar.
***
Vodka. Marijuana. Tobacco.
Many scents filled the room I was sat in.
The room filled with my family.
Jesse and Ivan lay at on the bed, holding each other carefully while keeping their drinks steady.
Alec sat with his back leaning on the wall further down the bed, with Sky close to him. Both boys were passing a joint between them silently.
I sat furthest away and closer to the ladder, only so I could get out quickly and easily if Kenzie phoned me at any time.
If he needed me, I'd be there in a heartbeat.
Zach and Reagan organised our shit on the coffee table, rolling cigarettes and joints expertly so we wouldn't have to mess around if we were too drunk to even see our hands.
Lana and Bodhi were probably the loudest in the room. Laughing and joking around.
It seemed so weird looking at everyone now. It's strange thinking just 7 years ago, we were all sat in these very spots. Yet our lives were completely different.
"Just ask Elle." Lana hiccuped loudly, turning to me with a amused smile on her face. "What would you do if you had a kid?"
"Me?" I scoffed, trying to ignore the way my heart skipped at her question. "I don't like kids."
"You do." She insisted, "Just imagine if you had a kid, how would you want him to think of the world?"
I thought carefully, biting my lip slightly. "If my son was born, I'd want him to run into my arms and look at me. I'd want him to always remember that I love him; Forever and evermore. I'd never want him to lose that sense of family and belonging. Yes, I'd be scared of ruining him, but I would try and in the end, that's all I could do."
Lana's lips went up, until she was grinning at me like the Cheshire Cat. She turned to Bodhi with a smug grin on her face. He scowled, reaching into his pocket and handing her $20.
"I told you she'd be an awesome Mom." Lana kissed the paper, tucking it into her back pocket.
You really have no idea.
My brows furrowed, "What?"
"Lana was going on about how you would be a great mom and shit, but I said you didn't even want kids and she told me she'd prove me wrong." Bodhi explained, a scowl on his face.
"I don't wan-"
Alec cut me off, "You said son. Does that mean you would rather have a boy?"
"I wouldn't care. I could have a boy and he'd grow up to learn he was a girl, or vice versa. I don't think I'd care, as long as they were happy." I explained carefully, noticing how Alec's face broke out in a smile at my words.
"I'm gonna be a great Uncle." He thought aloud, "So tell me the names of my possible nieces and nephews."
I rolled my eyes at his childlike tone. "I like Beau for a boy, I guess. Amber or Madison for a girl."
Alec placed his finger on his chin, pretending to think. "Beau Alexander Quinn. I like the sound of that."
"What do you mean Alexander?" Ivan shot up, staring at his older brother in disbelief. "It's going to be Beau Ivan Quinn."
"No it fucking isn't." Sky argued with both of them, throwing a pillow in Alec's face. "Skylar. Beau Skylar Quinn."
"Abso-fucking-lutely not." Alec narrowed his eyes at both his brothers.
"Well." All of them glared at Bodhi as he spoke up, obviously expecting him to try and argue for his name.
He shocked us all with his next words.
"You're all wrong." He shrugged, taking a drag from his cigarette slowly. "It's going to be Beau Jensen."
My heart pounded against my chest at his blunt words, a small blush appearing on my cheeks.
The comments started instantly.
"She's not marrying a Jensen." Zach complained.
"I don't care about it's fucking last name. If it doesn't have the middle name Ivan, I'll send the thing to a dog shelter."
"If Beau gets his middle name off one of them rich bitches, I will stab you in the throat." Alec threatened, deadly serious.
I chuckled at all of them, shaking my head at their words. "I'm not marrying any of them, and I won't name my kid after them. I don't even want kids!"
"Yes you do." "Good." Lana and Bodhi spoke at the same time. Lana glared at him, smacking the back of his head instantly.
The connection echoed throughout the room, causing Jesse to bite down on his lip to stop his laughs.
I accept the joint from Reagan's hand with acquiesce, sending him a large grin in thanks.
Zach stared at me with a knowing glimmer in his eyes, yet I ignored it.
I don't have time to think about that stuff anymore.
Inhaling the fumes demurely, one last thing enters my mind.
I left Kenzie my hoodie.
-&-
No warnings on this chapter!
What did you guys think???
What's your favorite name for a child? Or what name do you think would best suit Rocky's kid??
And what do you think Rocky means?
Thank you reading!!
All my love,
Alaska xx