She lied. Lied about the fucking pregnancy just to get a reaction from me?
Thereâs no child⦠that makes me feel fucking weird when I had just made up my mind that there will be a kid and now sheâs angry at me for fucking not being ecstatic before telling me she lied.
âWell, I am, I have things to do,â she replies, sounding defeated.
Frowning, I look at her. There seems to be more to it⦠âValerie⦠do you want a kid?â I ask quietly.
She pauses, her eyes flickering with pain as she looks down. Her heart is racing, and I see the telltale sign of her lip quivering. âIâm thirtyâfive years old⦠yeah, one day I do.â
âThereâs more to it,â I state quietly, and I know there is.
She looks up at me, her eyes glittering with tears. âI was pregnant once⦠way back when I was first dating Jai⦠the day he was set up was the day I found out⦠and a few days later I miscarried.â Her voice breaks at the last word.
My frown softens, and I tug her into my arms, hugging her tightly. I hate that sheâs been through a fucking lot.
âHey⦠that doesnât mean you will never be a mom.
âIâm sorry, I shouldnât have said I was, I just-â
âItâs cool. You didnât keep the fucking charade up for long but yeah donât do that shit again,â I say, and I do fucking mean it.
She looks up at me and nods, guilt glimmering in her eyes.
âStill, Iâm sorry.â She leans up and kisses my cheek. âI amâ¦â she sighs heavily, wrapping her arms around my waist.
I hug her back, rubbing her back and wishing she didnât feel the way she did. âYouâre still young, Little Mate, maybe⦠in the future sometime you to be the Mom youâve always will a wanted to be. Maybe not maybe⦠I think the word Iâm looking for is one day. I get you want this, and weâll get there.â
ââ
Itâs hard for me, but Iâm certain there will come a fucking time that I will be ok with it. I know. I will. I donât think Iâll make the same mistake my mother made with me. Perhaps a talk with Hugh is something I need⦠to let go of the feelings bottled inside and to get the closure I need.
âReally, you think soâ¦â her heart races with hope.
âYeah, I know so. So, cheer up, trust me you really arenât missing much,â I say just as we hear a child laugh.
What the-
âThe children are here!â Valerie exclaims, her mood clearly lifting.
Sebastianâs kidsâ¦
âI want to see, Mommy. I need to know if heâs good for Aunty Velly!â
1 cock a brow, looking at Valerie, who smiles. âThatâs Xander, heâs the middle one. Want to go down to meet them?â she asks.
âNot really,â I answer.
Like I said, kids and I donât go.
She looks at me, almost as if debating forcing me to go or respecting my wish.
âAlright⦠you sure?â
I nod, and she reaches up, her gaze trailing to my lips. âI love you. I want you to know that.â
âYeah, I know, and you know I love you,â I answer, cupping her face as I close the gap between us and claim her lips in a deep kiss just as the door flies open.
âXander!â Zaiaâs voice is firmer than Iâve ever heard. I pull away and Valerie moves back as fast as possible as we both turn to the little boy who has just entered. He has Zaiaâs unique purple eyes and dark hair, like his fatherâs.
âMommy, I just wanted to see!â
âItâs alright,â Valerie says as Zaia appears, a disapproving, small frown on her face.
âNo. Itâs not. He knows he should not enter a room without knocking, and since Xander forgot basic manners, he will wait downstairs until you are ready to come down,â she says, taking her sonâs hand.
Fair parenting.
Valerie pouts as Xander bats his eyes innocently at her before he looks at me suspiciously.â Your eye is ugly.â He manages to say, blunt and matter of fact before Zaia shuts the door.
âHeâs a menace,â I remark. I âHeâs quite the handful, so want to come down and meet him and the others?â
âNo, I think Iâll stay here. That will serve him right for barging in, so⦠where the fuck were We?â
She smiles before snaking her arms around my neck. âRight about hereâ¦â she whispers, tugging me down and pressing her soft lips against mineâ¦