Feel free to point out any spelling, grammar, or spacing errors. I would really appreciate it and will fix them right away :)
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Ch6: You Kneed Me In The Balls
Day 61
I'm smiling as I grab drinks and bring them to our table. We arrived at Toxic around two hours ago and the bartender already knows what the usual means.
"Hey," I sit down and place the drinks on the table. It's our eighth drink of the night, but we're just getting started.
"Hi," Sam smiles while grabbing his drink.
"Chug?" I ask playfully and everyone nods.
"Chug!" they start yelling repeatedly. I grab my drink and pour it down my throat.
Everything starts spinning around me, but I don't care. I'm having fun.
"Dance?" he asks me a smile on his face. I smile before attempting to get up and almost falling. He catches me and starts laughing. He always seems to catch me when I fall.
I make my way towards the dance floor when it suddenly hits me who I'm dancing with. This is a mistake. This isn't real. I can't dance with him.
"It's your fault" he whispers in my ear and I turn to run away. Everything around me begins spinning and my legs feel like they've been turned to jelly.
"You can't run away," everyone starts yelling at me "you coward."
"No," I yell waking up. I'm sitting up covered in sweat on my bed.
"You okay?" Elliot asks while rushing into my room.
I turn to look at the clock on the clothing drawer and realize it's four am.
I don't care I have to get out of this bed. Out of this apartment or I will suffocate.
"I'm fine," I get up before walking to my clothing drawers and pulling out a sweater.
Why did I have that dream?
"What are you doing?" Elliot asks confused.
It's my fault.
"Going for a walk," I throw my sweater on.
I tried running, but I couldn't.
"This late at night?" he exclaims "you're crazy. It's dangerous for you to go out alone."
I was too drunk.
"I don't care," I put on some shoes "I need to get out of the apartment."
Why did I try running?
"No Lydia," he orders, but I walk out of my room.
I knew I couldn't leave. I can never leave
"I'm not asking you," I glare at him taking deep breaths "now move Elliot."
I ran like a coward. I will always be a coward.
"No Lydia," he stands in front of the door "do what ever you want I'm not moving."
My head is spinning with the memory of the dream and all I can see is everyone yelling at me.
"You can't run away you coward."
"You don't get it," I yell "I have to get out of here Elliot. Let me leave."
You've always been a coward. You will always be a coward. You hear me! You coward!!
"No" he starts, but I don't let him finish. I bring my knee up between his legs and he lets me go crouching in pain. I take advantage and run out the door, down the stairs, and out of the building. I keep running until I reach the ally me and Sam met at. I'm out of breath so I sit down against the wall.
I try crying, but the tears don't come. Maybe I can't cry anymore, but I need to. I have to let all this frustration and anger out. I stand up and face the cement wall before punching it as hard as I can. Pain shoots through my hand, but my eyes stay dry.
I don't cry. So I do the only thing I can do. Yell.
I yell out the only three words that come out.
***
I unlock the door of my apartment. I barely got home from my shift at work today. After I ran off I didn't come back to the apartment. I was in-charge of opening the restaurant today which meant my shift started at six am. Luckily I had a spare uniform in the employees room.
I walk inside and throw myself on the couch.
"Where the hell were you?" Elliot exclaims "I called San Café and your shift ended two hours ago."
Okay, so I delayed coming to the apartment. I walked around the city and crashed into Noah. He helped me correctly bandage my hand without asking questions.
I liked that about him.
No questions.
"I don't feel like fighting Elliot," I shake my head "not today."
"I was worried," he says "after you ran out on me this morning. I looked everywhere for you Lydia."
"I'm going to my room," I stand up, but Elliot grabs my arm.
"What happened to your hand?" he looks at my bandaged knuckles.
"I cut my hand with glass at work," I lie pulling my arm free.
"What's wrong Lydia?" he asks "why did you run off like that?"
"It doesn't matter," I glare at him "I just needed a breather."
"You kneed me in the balls," he yells "for a breather. Don't give me that bullshit."
"Why do you care Elliot?" I scream "You have done nothing, but ask about my life since you got here. Why is it so goddam important to you that I answer your questions?"
"I'm living with you," he answers "that's why."
"Come on," I laugh sarcastically "don't give me that bullshit. Why do you care so much? Uh?"
"I just want to get to know you," Elliot runs his hands through his hair "but you make it so hard Lydia. You block me out and I don't know how to get to you. I've tried Lydia, but your so complicated."
"Have you even considered that maybe I don't want you to get to know me," I speak.
"Why?" he walks closer to me "what's so bad that you can't let me in?"
Everything. My life, my family, and worst of all my past.
"I'm going to my room," I start walking, but again Elliot stops me.
"Don't walk away," he grabs my arm "I'm trying Lydia. I just want to understand why you do the things you do."
"Stop," I pull my arm free " I don't want to fight anymore Elliot. That's all we do, fight."
"Help me here Lydia," he begs "because I can't do this anymore."
"What do you want me to do?" I exclaim "I can't give you answers Elliot not the ones you want."
"I don't want magical answers," he speaks "I just want the truth."
"Why do you want it so bad?" I take a step forward.
"I just do," he says frustrated "and I don't know what do to when you run off like."
"Nothing," I roll my eyes "dont do anything."
"I can't!"
"Why?"
"Because I care about you Lyddie," he answers and I stare at him in shock. I was going to tell him that I was sorry for what happened this morning, but the door bell rings.
"I'll get it," I say awkwardly before walking towards the door. Opening it I see a short, skinny, blonde girl glaring at me.
"Who are you?" I ask.
"I'm Elliot's girlfriend."
A/N: Heyy guysss!!! So excuse how dramatic this chapter is, but I think Lydia has a pretty good reason to be dramatic. You will soon find out why she acts the way she does, but until then...
I hope you liked this chapter ending although I didn't tbh, but it's necessary for future reasons.
Anyways enjoy you're long weekend and happy early Labor day! :)
I'll update soon...
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Love, Pam