[Knight âGaruel Monzasiâ âs favorability has increased by 4.]
[Current favorability: 72/100]
Cadel smirked as he stared at the rising system window, and Garuel laughed along with him, wiping the corner of Cadelâs mouth that was glistening with saliva. Cadel dazedly accepted the touch, realizing that he had made a mess of Garuel as well, and reached out to wipe the corner of Garuelâs mouth as well.
Garuel paused, then squinted. As if drained by the long kiss, Cadel brushed the back of his head against the wooden post. Garuel nuzzled the exposed nape of Cadelâs white neck and spoke quietly.
âArenât you going to tell me? What did you talk about with the Scarlet Dragon?â
ââ¦â¦.â
âI want us to have no secrets.â
Cadel tried as hard as he could not to think about it, even as the steady gaze followed him. But it was impossible. He had to find the right words to answer the question, and he desperately racked his brain to come up with an answer that was not Cadel Lytos, but Shin Yeohwan.
The answer he came up with was still his own, so he couldnât be sure. Crumbling under the weight of his own despair, Cadel let the raw emotion flow out of him.
âHe says I have a special power.â
âA special power?â
âI told you before. Iâm living a life with a fixed end. I guess itâs something like that.â
ââ¦â¦You donât look happy at all. Normally, humans are happy when they have something special.â
Cadel grabbed Garuelâs hand at the nape of his neck and pulled it down. He squeezed Garuelâs soft fingers helplessly.
âBecause it doesnât seem to be my power. Itâs a power thatâ¦â¦ I feel like I stole it.â
âIs fate too much of a burden for you?â
Garuelâs gaze was still searching Cadelâs, but there was a kindness in it that sought to comfort him. Cadel slowly shook his head and smiled bitterly.
âIf itâs a burden, itâs aâ¦â¦ blessing in disguise. Iâm just pathetic. Iâm a much lesser human being than I thought I was, and I donât think Iâve ever realized it. Iâm upsetâ¦â¦ So yeah.â
âYou are strict with yourself. Commander.â
âRight.â
Cadel let go of Garuelâs hand and let out a shallow sigh.
He knew the terrible truth, but he couldnât let it keep him from being misled. He still had his subordinates by his side, subordinates who had given up so much for an insignificant commander.
He hoped that his unhappy anguish would not affect their lives. Even if he ended up sinking, they would have to rise to a very high place. For the lives he had greedily clutched in his sinful grasp deserved to be rewarded.
âEveryone will be worried. Letâs go back.â
After Garuel left to check on something, Cadel immediately fired a fireball to signal his subordinates. He planned to wait for his subordinates to gather, but before he could fire the third fireball, Lumen appeared.
As soon as he spotted Cadel, he checked him out. After a thorough examination, Lumen criticized him for his fearlessness in following the Scarlet Dragon, was relieved that he was safe, and warned him not to do it again.
âYou being reckless is not just for a day or two. I donât know what you were thinking when you followed the Scarlet Dragon, but it was pure luck that you survived, Leader. Why do you always act like someone who is frustrated because he canât try his luck?â
As he grabbed Cadelâs wrist, Lumenâs face reflected the intense emotions he was feeling. Lumenâs eyes were red and wild as if he were quite feverish. Cadel met the manâs bloodshot eyes and rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.
Heâd followed the Scarlet Dragon because he was certain he wouldnât kill him, but there was still no way to explain it.
âIâm sorry. I wasâ¦â¦ in a hurry.â
âIf youâre in a hurry twice, youâll go to the next world..â
ââ¦â¦Are you mad?â
He glanced over and Lumen, who was glaring at Cadel, let out a small sigh. Nervously running a hand through his hair, he searched Cadelâs face with a more subdued expression. His gaze, which had been darting about, settled on one spot.
âItâs swollen.â
Lips. Cadel reflexively raised his hand to cover his lips and smiled awkwardly at the sordid memory. It had been an impulsive kiss in the heat of the moment. He didnât regret it, but he couldnât ignore the embarrassment that followed.
Lumen stared at Cadelâs lips, red and swollen with blood, before reaching out and rubbing the surface. Cadel frowned slightly as he felt the bitter pain at his gentle touch, and Lumenâs brow narrowed.
âYou wouldnât have done it with the Scarlet Dragon. Is it Sir Garuel?â
ââ¦â¦What are you thinking?â
Cadel felt uncomfortable admitting it, so he turned away. Lumen pulled up the corner of his mouth as if he was annoyed and withdrew his touch.
âWell. I was thinking about the appointment ceremony I had with Leader. â¦â¦ It must have been intense.â
As Cadel remained silent, averting his gaze like a guilty man, Lumen pursed his lips a few times before finally turning away. Frowning as if he didnât like what he was doing, Lumen unwound Cadelâs cloak from around his longsword and spread it wide, draping it over Cadelâs back.
âLook.â
Lumen said, nudging Cadelâs back. Turning his head, he saw Garuel supporting Lydon and Van breathing heavily.
As soon as he spotted them, his steps quickened, and he sprinted to stand in front of his subordinates. As soon as Lydon saw Cadel, he pushed Garuel off of him, but it didnât seem to work.
âAre you hurt? If you were, you should have asked Garuel to heal you instead of being so stubborn!â
Cadel berated Lydon for not being able to walk properly. Lydonâs eyebrows drew together in frustration at the nagging.
âHesonia passed on his position as the Scarlet Dragonâs subordinate, Cadel. I canât refuse the Scarlet Dragonâs orders. Itâs unfair. Iâm sad. Donât nag me, just hug me.â
With a whimper, he pushed Garuel aside and swept Cadel into a bear hug. It was more of a fall than a hug, and Cadel had to strain his legs to buckle under the weight of the hulking fairy.
âHe canât resist the Scarlet Dragonâs ordersâ¦â¦. Was there some sort of contract between Kunra and Hesonia?â
The unexpected revelation raised questions, but he quickly dismissed them. For now, he had no intention of meeting with Kunra again, nor did he have the will to ask for more information.
Garuel reassured Cadel that Lydon was only weak from the depletion of his mana, but that there were no traumatic or internal injuries, and he naturally pulled Lydon, who was weighing Cadel down.
Lydon asked, dropping obediently but not taking his eyes off Cadel.
âIs it because of Hesonia that the Scarlet Dragon called Cadel?â
Hesonia hadnât been mentioned at all in his conversation with Kunra, but Cadel nodded with an awkward smile.
âAs expected of Commander.â
As Lydon fell, Van, who had been watching them from behind, approached.
âAre you hurt?â
Vanâs face was a mess of sweat as he carefully asked the question. He had been running around the mountain so vigorously that his uniform was torn here and there.
Cadel felt worried and guilty that Van was so tired, but he didnât express it right away. It would be fair to say that he was less than honorable.
One look at Van and Cadel had an unpleasant realization. Van Herdos was the first and last knight âCadel Lytosâ recruited. He was an ally of âCadel Lytosâ with memories that Shin Yeohwan didnât know about.
If so, wouldnât he be most influenced by Cadel Lytos when dealing with Van? Cadel realized that the feelings he had for Van, which he had so casually embraced until now, were growing distant like a lie.
âIâm fine.â
The words came out stiffly. He knew he shouldnât, but he didnât want to give Cadel Lytos any room to interfere with his emotions.
Van was slightly taken aback by Cadelâs uncharacteristic demeanor. He hesitated, then took a step toward Cadel, but Cadel did not allow him to approach.
âCommanderââ
âWe wonât see Kunra, no, the Scarlet Dragon, again until weâre out of the mountains, but that doesnât mean we can relax, so starting tomorrow, weâll be taking fewer breaks. Well, most of those breaks have been for me.â
Without hesitation, Cadel turned to face the others. He was sorry, but he didnât have the energy to deal with Van right now. Though he hadnât admitted it in front of everyone, Cadel was currently feeling extremely confused in the maelstrom of the newfound truth.
It was only for the sake of his subordinates that he could organize and plan as he usually did; it was his responsibility to them that drove him. So at a time like this, if his feelings for his subordinates were fueled by the suspicion that they might not even be his own, he would spiral downward.
It was a kind of self-defense. Though Van, bewildered by the sudden distance, would have no idea.
Cadel turned away bitterly, pretending not to see Van trying to say something to him.