WHY DO I WASTE ALL MY TIME THINKING OF YOU, I'D RATHER DIE
______ die with you.
DOOM GREW UP IN one of the most dangerous ghettos in Brooklyn, Brownsville Projects. Known for its constant rising crime rate but to many people it was known as their home.
Domani Jones was his real name but it was rare anyone outside of his family addressed him as anything other than Doom. He was given that nickname by his baby brother whom couldn't pronounce 'Dom' (obviously short for Domani) so at some point it just stuck.
While living in poverty alongside five other children and a mother that was out every night, Domani had no choice but to mature at an early age and do what every other teenage boy that needed to provide for their family did.
Sell drugs.
Cliche, right? It wasn't their fault though, these kids were simply products of their environments, trying to make do with the little opportunities they were given.
In the drug industry, there has always been a one out of one-hundred chance that any wannabe corner boy actually becomes bigger than that and fortunately for Domani, he was that one chance.
Aside from being a drug dealer, Domani had real dreams. He wanted to be a music artist. He'd been able to rap and play a multitude of different instruments since a kid and everyone knew of him for that talent.
But unfortunately, some people are taken away before they could ever achieve these dreams.
#SpeakingFromTheHeart
"Damnnnnn." Ghost exaggerated, staring amazed at his brother as he just finished his verse "That shit was so fucking hard."
Doom chuckled, taking the headphones off of his head "Nigga no pen, no paper. Came up with that shit off the top of my dome. Your turn." He sat down at the desk with the large computer monitor on it
The two boys sat in Dooms apartment, making music from the makeshift studio he had fixed up when he moved in a few weeks ago. They didn't plan to actually ever drop anything, fearing they wouldn't make it far and it'd just be a waste of time. Right now, they only looked at rapping as an outlet and something to entertain them.
Ghost exhaled the smoke in his mouth before standing to his feet and placing the headphones on his head, the beat shortly after flowing softly in his ears.
"Dropped a hundred-some-thousand inna account now i'm happy as fuck. Really don't give a fuck how i go get it, I can't go to sleep 'less I got me some bucks."
Dooms eyebrows scrunched as he bobbed his head roughly, "Mmm."
"Thought it was over, I seen my mans inside my dream and I couldn't lift up. Hop onna beat, hadda walk this bitch down. If she listen to me, Imma have the bitch stuck."
Suddenly, the beat stopped. Ghost's eyebrows furrowed as he looked up from the mic "What the fuck? Doom?"
Not only did his brother magically disappear from the room but so did the light. It was now pitch black and quiet as a mouse. Ghost could feel his body temperature slowly rising, almost like it did when his father came home drunk and angry but he wasn't in the toxic space of his family home. Instead he was in the safety of his brothers peaceful apartment, his personal sanctuary.
"Ghost!"
"Ghost wake up!"
"This nigga lowkey look like handsome squidward."
Popping his eyes open, Ghost awoke to Robbie hovering over him while recording him sleeping.
"Get your ugly ass out my fucking face." Ghost mumbled, groaning from the bright sunlight the curtains let in
"I know it don't feel good waking up and the first thing you see is Robert..." Hakeem shivered at the thought
Robbie's face straightened as he quickly stopped recording "Alright nigga. You pushing it."
Ghost sat up on the couch, his normal frown deepening "Smiling in my face and shit... fuck on."
The boys were at Reece's house chilling when Ghost had fell asleep on the couch. As unrealistic as it sounds, he had been up all night looking at pictures and videos of him and his favorite girl when they were younger.
Not to mention how he genuinely had trouble sleeping, he doesn't remember a time in his life where he didn't have this problem. This was just his normal.
"We got shit to do!" Reece yelled, standing impatiently at the front door
Robbie scoffed, trudging towards him "Okay Major Payne damn..."
"Ya'll got shit to do, not me." Ghost announced, sliding a basic white polo t-shirt over his head
"What you on then?" Hakeem questioned
"Not shit." The older shrugged, keeping it short and simple. He always did that when speaking to Hakeem, no matter what the circumstance was.
It was ten O'clock on a Monday night. Ghost didn't sell on nights like these yet there wasn't a specific reason why. Unlike the other three, he'd just rather spend his Mondays after school in the comfort of his own bed.
As they left the house, Reece and Robbie shared a look before bolting to Ghosts car, aiming for the passenger seat and because Reece had been on the track team since middle school, it was no surprise he had won... again, like every other time they raced.
"I don't even know why you try." Ghost shook his head, opening the car door
"Bitch ass," Robbie paused, trying to think of another insult as he grumpily hopped in the backseat with Hakeem "Usain Bolt wannabe ass nigga."
"Bet." Reece nodded,
Next to him, Ghost sat scrolling through his messages and call log confusedly. Kenji had called him while he was asleep but that wasn't what was so hard to understand, it was the fact that she called multiple times and that worried him.
Ignoring the bickering beside him, Ghost tried to call her back but it immediately went to voicemail "The fuck?" He mumbled
Robbie's face scrunched "This hunchback of Notre Dame ass car. I know you see this shit." He gestured to his cramped limbs
In retaliation for the sore loserness a few minutes ago, Reece had proudly managed to move the passenger seat back onto Robbie's legs, ultimately forcing him to sit awkwardly in the crowded car.
"You actin' like a bitch bro, all that damn complaining." Reece snickered
"Ya'll pissin' me off." The uncomfortable boy threw his head back onto the seat
"Nigga back here finna cry." Hakeem taunted, shaking his head
"Dawg look at my fucking legs!" Robbie raised his voice
"Yo..." Ghost trailed off, eyes still trained into his phone when he backed out of the driveway "Can ya'll shut the fuck up."
"Eyes on the road pal." Robbie said with a nerdy voice and tight lipped smile but the glare Ghost gave made him quickly look away
Ghosts leg bounced up and down nervously as he pressed a bit too hard on the gas pedal and hearing the phone continuously ring didn't help.
He released a sigh of relief when she answered, the sound of soft music playing in the background "You straight?"
"Yeah, I'm okay." She chuckled, the speaker muffling
"I just wanted to know if you could come over so we can work on some more of the project."
Ghost was incredibly tired and all he wanted to do right now was go home but he could never deny a reason to spend more time with Kenji.
"Imma be there. Just give me twenty minutes."
"That's fine." She responded meekly
"I'll bring you some food."
"No, you don't have to."
"I want to so I will. Kenji bro," He paused, eyebrows furrowing together "Don't piss me off."
She bursted into laughter at his offended tone "You get mad too quick for me."
One of Ghost's biggest pet peeves was when Kenji would reject his offers to buy her anything, it striked a terrible nerve within him.
Before he could respond, Reece had politely reached over and hung up the phone "If I can't be happy, no one can."
Ghost scrunched his face "I'll crash this bitch and kill all of us. Why the fuck would you do that?"
"Hold up now brother, you don't gotta do that." Robbie side-eyed, scratching his neck
"Exactly. I got too much to live for," Hakeem nodded, "I ain't had a threesome with two white bitches yet."
"I wish we knew less about you." Robbie frowned
xxx
peachesð¤
outside.
Ghost stared down at his phone with scrunched eyebrows, specifically gazing at Kenji's contact. He thought it was corny because of the heart emoji. He personally doesn't like emojis but he knows it'd make Kenji smile and gush if she knew he had one on her contact, especially a heart.
He shook his head, opening the car door and setting the food in his lap so it'd be easier to grab everything at once before his phone dinged with a notification.
peachesð¤
Ok
I'm coming
Ghost glanced up, hearing the front door open and footsteps padding towards him. His eyes danced up and down Kenjis figure, focusing more on her face; he'd always believed she was the prettiest girl in the world.
"That was fast." He stood to his feet, closing the car door with his free hand
"I was already downstairs when you texted me." She smiled up at him, "Let me help you." She said, reaching for the bag on top of the pizza box
Ghost turned away from her, "I got it. Walk."
Kenji shrugged while walking ahead of him towards the front door "My dad and Sekani is in here so-"
Interrupting her sentence was her father, standing at the door with a wide smile on his face making Kenji sigh deeply "Well never mind." She mumbled
"I know that ain't who I think it is!"
Ghost chuckled, "Wassup Mr. Carson."
"Boy tell me it ain't so! Blake?! Boy Ian seen you since you was this tall!" Eddie gushed, using his hand to illustrate a short height
Kenji rolled her eyes, "Dad please move."
"Oh my bad," The older man rubbed his bald head, "Ya'll come on up in here."
As they walked inside, Ghost blocked out Eddie going on and on about anything and everything behind him. He instead focused on the interior and aesthetic of the home he hadn't been inside of since sophomore year.
The house was spacious yet cozy at the same time. Some football game was playing on the flat screen TV that hung above the fireplace and Sekani sat on the couch with his hand covering his face while scrolling mindlessly on his phone.
"You can just set the food on the counter." Kenji voiced
Ghost followed her instructions, awkwardly standing while patting his pockets. It'd been so long since he'd even stepped foot in their yard, it's to no surprise when he felt out of place and like he didn't belong.
"Come shake my hand son!" Eddie always treated Ghost as if he was his own child but when the young boy went to do so, Eddie laughed loudly and pulled him into a tight hug while patting his back "Just playing! We're huggers in this family."
Ghost wasn't... he only stood there, "Oh, um thanks Mr. Carson... you can uh, you can let go now."
Sekani twisted his lips, not having the guts to watch as his dad embarrassed himself "This nigga so humiliating bro." He whispered
Eddie nodded, breaking the hug and walking towards the living room to annoy his son next. He truly found joy in doing these things.
"Sorry about him. He just missed you." Kenji gave a tight lipped smile
"It's straight, Ion mind." Ghost chuckled, "I can tell you itching to give me a hug next ." He rolled his eyes playfully, holding his arms open
Kenji giggled, walking into his arms as he immediately wrapped them around her "You know me so well."
Ghost dipped his head down into her neck, "You smell good peaches." He whispered, pressing a soft kiss to her shoulder that sent chills down her spine
"Move." She sassed, backing away from him out of nervousness. He was such a tease sometimes "Where was this boldness all those years we were no contact?"
"You right. My fault, Peach. I'll spend my entire life apologizing if it'll please you." He smirked, leaning back onto the counter with his arms crossed
Kenji rolled her eyes, "Thanks for the food."
"I got you Chick-Fil-A. The pizza is for your dad and brother because I didn't know what they would like."
"Awwww how sweet of you."
"Whew shit!" A loud voice exclaimed, "Don't nobody go in the bathroom for the next twenty minutes!" Santana walked down the stairs, swiping at the air
"God dammit! I could've sworn I changed the locks again. How the hell do you keep getting in?" Eddie cursed, scrunching his face
Santana smirked, holding a silver key above his head "It's nice to see you too Mr. Carson. "
"Yooo gangy." Sekani announced loudly
"Yo-" Santana paused, slowly whipping his head towards the kitchen "So this what we doing now?"
"Hello to you too." Kenji greeted
Santana stood in disbelief, "I thought we got rid of this guy six chapters ago."
"Fuck is you on about?" Eddie scoffed
Sekani smacked his lips together, standing and walking to the staircase "Man Tana come on. I'm trynna hop on 2K real quick."
"The love of my life is cheating on me right now and you talking about the game?" Tana questioned, pursing his lips "You know what, yeah. Let's go... but first."
Ghost raised an eyebrow, watching as the boy that seemed to be half his height march towards him with anger in his eyes.
"I'll be taking this." Santana hissed, snatching the pizza box and fiercely marching away
When the boys were out of sight, Ghost unsurely scratched his head "What is wrong with that kid?"
"He was dropped on the head a lot as a baby..." Kenji answered, "Come on. We gone go in my room."
-
"That shit better be good too." Ghost lowly chuckled, swashing his paint brush against the canvas
Kenji stopped chewing, side-eyeing him harshly "It most definitely is. You want some?"
"I'm straight." Ghost mumbled, staring down confusedly at his painting. He looked at Kenji's painting then back at his own and it was very obvious one was better than the other.
Ghost had lots of talents aside from music. He could skate, cook, and draw too but painting wasn't his strong suit at all.
"It's actually cute. Don't take it too serious."
"It's supposed to be the Mona Lisa. I don't even know who or what I'm looking at..."
"Boy hush and take the picture."
Ghost did as she said, adding it to their projects folder with all the other tasks they've completed "So far we have four of them done. Mine are skating and basketball. Yours are painting and baking."
"Oh shit! We forgot the brownies in the oven!" Kenji shrilled, dropping her chicken sandwich onto the plate and hopping off of her bed
"You supposed to be the queen of baking." Ghost mocked, following behind her down the stairs
Kenji rolled her eyes sassily, snatching a pair of oven mitts that were hung up on the wall "I am. My food was just so good that I forgot."
Ghost tried. He really did try his best not to look and respect her, even if they were just thoughts but the way Kenji bent over into the oven had his mind running rampant.
He could feel blood rush to his dick, making his pants immediately feel tighter than before. His heart beat raced and it didn't help that Kenji had on shorts.
The boy could feel his member throbbing, begging for a release but he would never initiate anything with Kenji, at-least not right now. Innocent flirting and beating his dick to thought of her in the shower would have to make do until then.
Not to mention how he'd been having these thoughts since he stepped foot in her room. That room only reminded him of how the two had taken each other's virginity just a few years ago.
The way she moaned and squealed when he went deeper, the way they held hands and eye contact, the way he groaned her name, the way they-
You get the point.
"Siah look!" Kenji happily clapped, pulling at his arm "It's so perfect! We came at the right time."
Snapping back to reality, Ghost nodded, looking at the brownies "I agree." He pitifully cleared his throat
Kenji smiled up at him, grateful for his approval. She would never in a million years admit it but his opinion mattered a lot to her.
Ghost sighed, awkwardly wrapping his arms around her short figure, he really wasn't a hugger but he would always pretend to be one for the sake of her feelings.
The girl closed her eyes and breathed his scent in. He smelled like weed, cologne, and laundry detergent. Oddly enough, his smell was probably one of her favorites.
Fuck I hope she can't feel my dick on her thigh, Ghost thought with a frown
Interrupting their hugging session was the sound of his phone vibrating. As Kenji turned around to cut the brownies, Ghost put his focus on the device.
+1 (917) 574-2063
u otw?
yeah
stop texting me
sorry
"I gotta go." He huffed, pocketing his phone
"Okay." She remarked, "Lemme pack you some brownies and then I'll walk you out."
"Ight."
A few minutes later, the two were outside standing beside Ghost's car. They weren't doing anything besides talking about the project but somehow Kenji randomly felt on edge.
Maybe it was how he stared down at her, his height had always made her nervous or maybe it was just his presence as a whole.
"You straight?" Ghost chuckled, glancing at her
"Mhm."
He hummed, "Then why are you biting your lip?"
Kenji immediately stopped chewing on her bottom lip, it was such a habit she didn't even realize "Well I'm just extremely nervous right now so-"
She was cut off by suddenly noticing how close they actually were. She could feel his body heat, maybe even feel his soft heart beat. This was different than any closeness they shared by a hug. This was intense and tension-filled.
"I make you nervous?" He raised an eyebrow, staring down at her with a tilted head
"I didn't say that."
"You implied it."
"Maybe..." She trailed off, looking away from his striking gaze
Ghost's eyes twinkled as he bent down to her height, nearing her ear, he whispered "Go in the house, Peaches."
She felt a shiver travel from her head to her toes, slowly nodding with an awkward smile "Yep! I'm uh, I'm going in the house."
Slowly backing away while throwing a thumbs up his way. She quickly turned around, scurrying towards her front door.
Once she was inside, Ghost hopped inside his car. He stared ahead at nothing particular, just allowing his mind to roam about today's events until a loud ringing interrupted.
"What?" He answered, "I told you not to text me, calls included."
"Can you please hurry. I need it."
Rubbing his temples irritably, Ghost huffed "I'm on the way. Stop calling me, Athena."
YOUR EYES ARE ALWAYS IN MY MIND, IT KEEPS ME AWAKE AT NIGHT CAUSE YOU'RE IN MY HEAD
AUTHORS NOTES %
Goodbye why I come back to this app and ya'll clocking me ...
AND THE TWO PEOPLE THAT LIKED THIS IS MESSY ASFððð ???
Likeee what's teaaa like... who need that from me?? ð
ya'll funny fr
But fr tho Athena so desperate! He don't even got her number saved