Chapter 80: Volume 3 - CH 3.5

I went home, finished dinner and homework, and also took a bath.

Normally this would be when I would play games, but today for some reason I was not in the mood for that, so I lay on my bed without even drying my hair.

“For me to actually experience such a frightening change…”

Bewildered by my own state of mind, I glanced at my phone.

On the screen were Yuzu’s contact details. All I had to do was tap the screen once more and  I’d be dialling her number.

An unintelligible sound escaped my mouth as I was dithering.

Despite being together just a few hours previously, somehow I felt like I wanted to hear her voice. Before I realised it, I was chasing her with my eyes the whole day and getting embarrassed at the slightest touch; it felt like I was not being myself.

“It would be weird if I called her out of the blue…”

Although Yuzu had called me a few times, I’d never called her for no reason. Even now, I was trying to think of a suitable reason to call her, but I couldn’t think of anything in particular.

“…This is no good. Maybe some other time.”

I couldn’t think of any relevant reason and let out one sigh before giving up. Then I looked away from my phone screen and suddenly saw the calendar.

Christmas Eve was less than two weeks away.

“…The Christmas Fulfilment event.”

The event where one would invite someone they had a crush on to confess their feelings. The fact that I didn’t address the misunderstanding regarding this event during yesterday’s date pretty much meant that my course of action was half set in stone.

“So… I’ll confess? To Yuzu?”

When I put it like that, I suddenly felt like I was drowning from the pressure.

The odds were probably in my favour. If I were in the position of a third party, I would certainly think: Just get on with it and confess! But when it finally involved me myself, that objectivity instantly vanished.

I groaned in anguish.

What if all this was my own wishful thinking? Yuzu’s attitude up to this point had been that of a good friend, and I didn’t really see her as an object of romantic interest… So, it might not be so-called ‘love’, but just simple ‘like’?

In the first place, had I done anything to make Yuzu like me?

We just played games together every day. Yuzu was merely accommodating me and my hobbies. I wondered if I had really done enough to make her aware of me as a member of the opposite sex.

“…Kotani’s words now really hit home,” I unknowingly muttered.

“When I’m about to confess, all I can see is my own inadequacies. Like, maybe I’m not the right person for him because I have a harsh personality, or that we haven’t talked long enough with just the two of us, or that we haven’t looked at each other properly lately.”

Those words contained all the truths.

At the stage when you tried to muster up your courage, you would finally see all that you were lacking.

“…It’s not just about liking the other person, it’s about how much you can like yourself, huh?”

Can I like myself enough?

Enough to be able to confess by Christmas Eve?

“…Not good. I better go wash my face once.”

Feeling stuck in my thoughts, I let out a deep sigh and raised my upper body when suddenly—

“…Acchooo!”

—I sneezed as hard as I could, probably because I hadn’t even dried my hair this midwinter.

“So cold! I should go get the hairdr—huh?”

Before I finished my word, my eyes caught sight of the screen of my phone, which was still in my hand.

Displayed on the screen was: Calling Nanamine Yuzu.

“…No way, no way, no way!”

Huh? Did I mistap? During that sneeze?

Wh-what to do?! Is there any good reason I can say for making this call? No, before that, I should end this call before she answers—

[Hello!]

Alas, before I could execute that thought, I heard Yuzu’s voice from the receiver.

I was too late… Now that it had come to this, I should just take the plunge. I faintly took a deep breath and put the phone to my ear.

“Hello, is this Yuzu?”

[Yep. This is rare, Yamato-kun actually calls me.]

It must be my imagination, but the tone of Yuzu’s voice that reached my ear was somewhat bouncy.

“Um, it’s nothing, just wondering what are you up to?”

I had no idea of any reason for this call, so I just bullshitted some excuse.

[I’m just finishing up my homework. I was thinking this was the perfect time to take a break and here you are, giving me a call.]

Yuzu responded to the conversation without any particular incredulity. I was relieved, but at the same time, I realised that I had been overthinking things and felt irresistibly embarrassed.

[By the way, Yamato-kun, you’ve completed your homework?]

“Of course. It’s hard to concentrate on the game when there’s something on my mind.”

[Yamato-kun, you are always all about games.]

Even over the phone, I could imagine Yuzu’s exasperated face.

“Yeah, I’m the type of man who leads a full life centred around what he likes.”

“That’s a good life, but at least focus on me at Christmas.”

Being interjected with a very sensitive matter, I was dumbstruck.

“Ow, oh! W-well, that…” I stammered in reply.

It was unknown what impression she had of me due to that, but after a slight pause, Yuzu spoke.

[Listen, Yamato-kun, about the ‘Christmas Fulfilment’ event…]

“What about it?”

[….Um, just wondering if you know what time it’ll start. You see, we’ve yet to arrange the time and the place to meet.]

“Yeah, that’s true.”

For a moment, I felt that Yuzu was trying to say something different, but over the phone, I couldn’t make out the finer nuances.

“On that day, the winter display lights start at sunset——”

Like that, we continued discussing the day of Christmas Eve for a while.

chocolala: Aww, that’s cute~~