Chapter 71: Chapter 430: Pride of Existence (2)

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“…….”

Barbatos slowly opened her eyes, allowing our eyes to naturally meet.

Barbatos half-closed her eyes as if she were still slightly sleepy. It would be impossible for someone to fully relieve their fatigue if they had to sleep while hanging from the ceiling. She must be exhausted and tired in more ways than one. Her voice sounded somewhat faint and distant.

“I dreamt of something nostalgic.”

“A dream, is it?”

“Yeah, that’s right. So it was around that time Zepar started growing out his beard…… He was always so foolishly serious.”

Barbatos chuckled quietly as if something amused her. I simply puffed on my pipe. I wasn’t sure how much of a difference there was between her laughter and the smoke I was exhaling.

We were in a solitary cell, enclosed on all sides by ashen walls. It was perpetually cool and gloomy, like a shadowed place always damp from rain. I never imagined a day would come when the two of us would be having a conversation in a place like this. Barbatos likely felt the same. She playfully rattled the chains around her wrists.

“Ah, ah—. In the end, I got dumped. This is why loving men is pointless. I’m such an idiot, aren’t I? It’s like I had rose-colored glasses on, and not just one layer but three.”

Despite having her horns severed and her limbs bound, she was endlessly nonchalant. But then again, this was Barbatos—proud and fearless like a lioness.

“Do you regret loving me?”

“Of course I regret it. I regret it a lot. You know, I enjoy breaking up with lovers, but I really hate being dumped by them. If I could go back in time, I’d go straight for smashing your balls first.”

I laughed.

I silently stared at Barbatos for a moment. It was as if time had stretched only around my heart, like when music suddenly comes to a stop. That moment of silence lingered, and then, like a snapped bowstring, it broke with a sudden twang.

“I killed Paimon, Barbatos.”

“Huh? I know.”

“No.”

I shook my head.

“With these hands. I personally drove the blade into Paimon’s body.”

“…….”

“I caught every drop of Paimon’s blood. Once in the neck. Once in the back. Once in the nape. A total of three times, I thrust the finely sharpened dagger into her.”

I lightly tapped my neck and back with my fist, mimicking the act. A smile still lingered on my lips.

“With each stab, there was a little tremble. A shudder ran through her body. She tried to hold on, but in the end, she slumped against me. I hit every vital point so precisely that it didn’t take long for her to die.”

Barbatos stared at me blankly. She had believed that the archdukes killed Paimon. It was the first time she had heard that I personally killed her. For some reason, I felt slightly pleased. In fact, it would always lift my mood whenever Barbatos had that vacant expression.

“The important part here is that I deliberately stabbed her neck twice. Making sure the blood reversed through her throat so that she couldn’t speak properly was crucial.”

“Huh……?”

“It’s because of her last words. When someone’s about to die, they leave final words, do they not, Barbatos?”

I smiled softly.

“Before I killed Paimon, I gave her a wedding ring. Happiness means letting your guard down, after all. The moment she was happiest was when she was the most defenseless. So, after giving her the ring…….”

I pulled the ring out of my pocket. The very one I had once slipped onto Paimon’s ring finger myself. Holding it between my fingers, I spoke playfully.

“I stabbed her. Without a moment of hesitation. What do you think about that? Was that not a bit excessively cruel? I think so too.”

“…….”

“Paimon probably thought the same. That it was too cruel. So, if she had left her last words, no doubt, she would have cursed me with all the venom she could muster. A curse so dark, so deep, so terrifying, I can’t even begin to imagine it.”

I couldn’t bear to listen to that.

The curse Paimon would have left behind would surely lodge itself deep in my mind, never to be erased. Her curse would haunt me as visions and echoes, constantly blaming me.

I didn’t overestimate my own mental strength. I was already teetering on the edge. Hearing things was manageable, but seeing things—visions—that was a real problem. Add Paimon’s curse on top of that, and my mind might truly collapse.

Swiftly.

Not allowing her even a chance to leave her final words.

That was how it had to be done.

“But even after losing all her power, A Demon Lord is still a Demon Lord. She had just enough strength to utter one last line. Just one, final line. Of course, she couldn’t say anything long. She couldn’t use complex words either. Blood kept flowing up from her throat, so it had to be short and simple…….”

A single line was far too brief to encapsulate one’s entire life. But for Paimon, such an absurdly brief moment was all that remained.

She didn’t have time to think. The man holding her, the one who was both her fiance and her killer, was before her, and she had to hurry to leave her last words. Drawing on her remaining strength, Paimon opened her mouth.

“‘I love you’, she said.”

“…….”

“That woman. She said those words as she placed her hand on my cheek and died. Do you understand what that means, Barbatos? It wasn’t a simple confession. Of course not.”

I took the pipe from my mouth and smirked.

“In that desperate, final moment, Paimon—of all things she could’ve said—thought of the most effective, cruelest curse possible. Isn’t that utterly genius?”

“…….”

“Paimon knew. She didn’t need to unleash a torrent of curses to destroy me. She knew that a single, carefully chosen line would do the job. What a thoroughly ruthless woman, don’t you think? It’s an instinctual kind of cunning.”

Barbatos’ expression twisted in a strange way. It wasn’t sadness or concern, but a mixture of emotions that couldn’t be easily described. For a while, we just stared at each other.

“Dantalian. When…… did you start being tormented by hallucinations?”

The question came out of nowhere.

I didn’t hesitate or waver.

“Hallucinations? I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

“Don’t play dumb. I’ve seen thousands upon thousands of soldiers swallowed by war.”

Barbatos’ tone grew sharper.

“You killed someone quickly out of fear that the person you’re murdering might leave a final word? That’s typical behavior of a killer trapped in hallucinations. Don’t even think about making excuses. When it comes to matters related to war, no one knows more than I do.”

Barbatos stared directly into my eyes.

“At first, it started with nightmares, right? Then came the voices. The last stage is hallucinations. Once it gets that bad, there’s no fixing it. When did it start? Answer me.”

I met Barbatos’ gaze in silence. A heavy stillness settled between us. Barbatos slowly began to part her lips.

“That’s impossible……. No, wait, just how long have you been like this……?”

“Don’t misunderstand. I’m perfectly fine.”

“So that’s why you’ve been drowning yourself in drugs and alcohol……. Wait, that started back during the Crescent Alliance……. No, Dantalian. Look at me. Look me in the eyes, you son of a bitch!”

What in the world is Barbatos rambling about?

I’ve been staring at her this whole time.

“Ah……! Ahh!”

The swirling emotions on Barbatos’ face finally settled. Or perhaps it would be more accurate to say they twisted even further. She stared at me, her expression now purely dyed in shock.

“How…… did I not notice something so simple?!”

“If I’m not mistaken, we aren’t on the same page right now. I don’t understand a word you’re saying, Barbatos.”

“Dantalian, you…… when you talk to people, you only ever stare at their faces and eyes!”

The conversation was escalating.

I tilted my head slightly.

“Of course, when you talk to someone, you focus on the face. Is that not basic courtesy?”

“I should’ve realized sooner……. Why didn’t I see it……? You haven’t been looking at people. You had no choice but to fix your gaze on people’s faces because that’s all you could focus on…….”

“It seems like you’re the one who’s lost their mind, not me.”

I shrugged.

Barbatos bit her lips.

“How many? How many are there!?”

“I’ve been saying since the beginning that I have no idea what you’re talking about.”n/ô/vel/b//in dot c//om

“How many dead faces are you seeing in this room!?”

That’s the thing.

There’s no one else here besides Barbatos and me.

Why does Barbatos keep insisting on such strange things?

“It’s a plea deal. Zepar said he would take the fall for you. If you don’t testify in public that you planned Paimon’s assassination all by yourself, the entire Plains Faction will be executed.”

“Turn your head!”

“You must care for your subordinates. If you don’t want the Plains Faction to be annihilated, it’s in your best interest to confess your cr—.”

“Turn your head the other way! You fucking son of a bitch! Listen to me and turn your gaze somewhere else!”

Barbatos yelled. It seemed like she had no intention of continuing negotiations unless her demand was met. With a sigh, I turned my head to the other side. It was just a corner of the solitary cell. There was nothing there.

“All right, satisfied? I turned my head as you wanted. Now, if you’re done, can we have a more constructive conversati—.”

“What do you see there?”

Barbatos persisted. Truly, she was more relentless than a leech.

“Answer me. What do you see in that corner?”

“Nothing. There’s nothing there. Just a damp, wet stone wall.”

“…….”

“Come on, let’s not waste time with useless delusions. We’ve got more important things to deal with, do we not?”

I held back a sigh as I returned my gaze to Barbatos.

I couldn’t help but freeze. Barbatos’ face—more devastated than any expression I had ever seen before—was twisted in utter sorrow. She was crying.

“Why…… why didn’t you say anything to me before it got this bad……? I was always by your side……. If you had just said one word, if you had leaned on me just a little, things might have been different…….”

“…….”

“You idiot, Dantalian……. There are torture devices in that corner…….”

More tears fell, tracing lines down her face.

“What in the world is ‘blocking’ your sight……?”

***

In that spot.

—Were crouching corpses drenched in blood.

In this very room, dozens of bodies were surrounding Barbatos and me. Some were impaled on spears, some were beheaded, reduced to nothing but heads. Blood-soaked corpses encircled the two of us, sitting or sprawling in grotesque positions.

They all shared one thing in common.

They were all staring at me, their gazes fixed on my face. Sometimes, they whispered to one another, though it was so faint that I couldn’t make out the words. Of course, a severed head shouldn’t be able to speak at all. They were nothing more than phantoms, illusions that didn’t exist.

“So Paimon is also there.”

Barbatos gazed at me with tear-filled eyes.

“You can see Paimon too, right, Dantalian? Tell me honestly…… where is Paimon showing up for you right now?”

I smiled gently.

“As I’ve said before, there’s no one here, Barbatos.”

***

TL Note: Thanks for reading the chapter. This chapter is really a bombshell, huh. We finally have an idea of how much Dantalian has broken down.

Also, I can’t believe I finally got some leeway from work only to immediately catch Covid again that following weekend. The weekend after that I was forced to go on a family trip to Wonju. It’s almost comical how much the weekends I’ve been trying to use to translate get stolen from me lately. It suuuucks.

Side note, the first snow of Korea hit today and it’s been blizzarding outside for the past 6 hours. Pray I don’t die on my way home from work.