She could hear her own heartbeat, exploding in her ears like muffled thunder. Her blood raced, making her touch hyper-sensitive, and then her hands were suddenly grasped again.
âTry⦠try what?â Pei Muchanâs voice trembled slightly.
âNothing, I was just talking off the cuff,â Xu Qingyan said without changing his expression, slowly withdrawing his hand, âto try to buy a lottery ticket, see if I could win the jackpot.â
Pei Muchan hadnât expected Xu Qingyan to test her so directly, not leaving her any time to prepare. Now she either had to agree, since one canât date alone,
or take it as a joke, but with his personality, who knows when there would be another chance. In that instant, her mind was a mess, yet she had to make a decision immediately.
Buzz! He lightly pressed on the gas pedal, gradually increasing the speed.
Suddenly, Xu Qingyan felt his hand being seized, which made him pause briefly. Then the speed slowly decreased again until the car came to a complete stop by the roadside with the hazard lights flashing.
He looked down at the delicate white hand covering his, then up at Pei Muchan. There wasnât the anticipated joy, but rather a sense of unwillingness to cause her distress.
At that moment, the usually poised woman looked like a little dog abandoned on a rainy day, her eyes brimming with tears as she looked at him.
Using such an almost cheating method to force Pei Muchan into compromise seemed somewhat immoral. No⦠not exactly immoral.
He had always been despicable, not a good person by any means.
To Pei Muchanâs surprise, Xu Qingyan pushed her hand away. She froze, seemingly never having considered that Xu Qingyan would reject her hand.
âThese things arenât like scratching a lottery ticket, where you know the answer immediately upon selection,â he glanced at Pei Muchan, meeting her gaze squarely.
He then chuckled and said,
âIâm really joking. Thereâs no exam in the world that issues the âend testâ order right after the questions are handed out. Even if there were, you shouldnât scribble down answers just because others have started turning in their test papers.â
Having said this, he tapped his fingers on the steering wheel, appearing contemplative. Returning to Xinghai was just an excuse; it didnât matter which direction the car drove.
The destination had been set from the start, merely roaming over her pent-up emotions.
As Xu Qingyan had said, the test paper had just been refreshed. He had merely kindly reminded Pei Muchan to answer the questions, not expecting her to write down the answers right away.
In this materialistic age, some fall in love at first sight, others in the whispering winds. Some people just move slower and havenât yet reached that point in time.
It wasnât about whether she was willing to try or not, but that the feelings hadnât reached that level. Adults experiencing their first true love tend to confirm their feelings bit by bit.
Pei Muchanâs hand hung by her side, her chest rising and falling slightly as the night deepened with a dense rain.
âMhm.â
âI need a bit of time, youâve been too kind to me,â she said, lowering her gaze, finally revealing her hand that she had kept hidden all evening, laying it out before him.@@novelbin@@
âI want to go to work with you every day and appear in the studio. I was happy during that time⦠I donât know how things will turn out in the future, Iâm afraid itâll justâ¦â
âItâs fine, I was just playing,â Xu Qingyan nodded, jokingly commenting, âAnd youâve been pretty good to me too, huh? The house, the car, take whatever you like, I feel almost like Iâm being kept.â
At this, Pei Muchan seemed a bit more at ease and slightly reproachful.
âDidnât you go out to rent a place to live? No one stays in that apartment of mine all year round, my parents wonât come to Xinghai, and I basically only go home for the New Year.â
âItâs not quite the same with these things, you care more about what you lack,â Xu Qingyan said, âIâve really never been kept by anyone, and suddenly being given such a large and ample âmealâ to enjoyâ¦â
âIâm renting a place outside⦠uh, letâs not talk about this anymore. In the end, it doesnât mean anything else; everyoneâs thoughts are related to their family upbringing and local culture.â
âItâs difficult to truly agree with this kind of thing, but Iâm explaining it to you because I donât want you to misunderstand. It really is a trifling matter, where to live is not important.â
âMhm.â A warm current flowed through Pei Muchanâs heart; she could tell he cared about her thoughts.
Some things became much lighter once they were talked out.
He reached out to touch the back of Pei Muchanâs hand and, in a soft voice, asked, âWere you upset when I rented a place to live? What about now, do you still brood over it?â
The car was silent, except for the raindrops pattering on the roof. At some point, the rain had grown heavier. Continuous thin threads shrouded the windows, making them appear frosted.
The question was quite intimate, and Pei Muchan, still with her eyes downcast, quietly affirmed with a hum. It was rare to see her so open, and it made her seem vulnerable.
Honestly, Xu Qingyan thought of Pei Muchan as someone quite strong.
At least she seemed that way, a calm and collected woman who could endure anything no matter how hard or dark the days became.
But sometimes, he could glimpse Pei Muchanâs extremely vulnerable side.
Xu Qingyan reached out and caught her soft hand, gently squeezing it with an unusual seriousness.
âItâs okay, take your time. I will always be with you, not letting anyone bully you. Until you, until I figure things out, thereâs no rush for this matter.â
âItâs my first time too, and thereâs a lot I donât understand. I think thereâs no need to overthink, there are too many things to do right now, Iâll do the things you havenât managed to.â
âTo see a bigger world, to meet more people, whatâs Ji Chen compared to that? Whether itâs the TV show crew or the film crew, they are nothing, just give me a little timeâ¦â
Pei Muchan stared into his eyes, slightly stunned.
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