The next few weeks were miserable, not only because I was sick and healing from my injuries, but because the lull in my public schedule gave me plenty of time to freak out about Nikolaiâs abdication.
I was going to be queen. Maybe not tomorrow or a month from now, but one day, and one day was far too soon.
I lifted my wineglass to my lips and stared up at the night sky. It was three weeks to the day since my conversation with Nikolai.
My concussion had healed, and Iâd long since recovered from my cold. I still had to be careful with my wrist, but otherwise, I was up and running again, which meant I had to attend meeting after meeting about how and when to announce the abdication, how to handle the fallout, plans for my permanent move back to Eldorra, and a million other things that made my head spin.
That morning, my family, Markus, and I agreed on an official announcement a month from now. Or rather, everyone else agreed, and I went along with it because I didnât have a choice.
One more month of freedom, and that was it.
I was about to take another drink when the door to the rooftop creaked open. I straightened, my mouth falling open when I saw Rhys step outside. Judging by the way his eyebrows shot up, he was as surprised to see me as I was him.
âWhat are you doing here?â we asked at the same time.
I huffed out a small laugh. âMr. Larsen, this is my house. I should be the only one asking that question.â
âI didnât think anyone came out here.â He took the seat next to me, and I tried not to notice how good he smelled, like soap and something indescribably Rhys. Clean, simple, masculine.
We were on the rooftop of one of the palaceâs north towers, which could only be accessed via the service hallway near the kitchen. Compared to the palaceâs actual, terraced rooftop garden, it was nothing, barely big enough for the chairs Iâd bribed a staff member to help me bring up. But that was why I liked it. It was my secret haven, the place I escaped to when I needed to think and be away from prying eyes.
I drained the rest of my wine and reached for the bottle at my feet, only to realize it was empty. I rarely drank so much, but I needed something to ease the anxiety following me around like a black cloud these days.
âJust me. Most people donât know about this place,â I said. âHow did find it?â
âI find everything.â Rhys smirked when I scrunched my nose at his arrogance. âI have the palace blueprints, princess. I know every nook and cranny of this place. Itâs myââ
âJob,â I finished. âI know. You donât have to keep saying it.â
Heâd said the same thing in Dr. Hausenâs office. I wasnât sure why it annoyed me so much. Maybe because, for a second, I couldâve sworn his worry for me went beyond his professional obligations. And maybe, for a second, I couldâve sworn I wanted it to. I wanted him to care about me as , not as his client.
Rhysâs lips quirked before his gaze traveled to my forehead. âHowâs the bruise?â
âFading, thank the Lord.â It was now a pale yellowish green. Still unsightly, but better than the glaring purple it used to be. âAnd it doesnât hurt so much anymore.â
âGood.â He brushed his fingers gently over the bruise, and my breath stuttered. Rhys never touched me unless he had to, but at that moment, he didnât to. Which meant he wanted to. âYou gotta be more careful, princess.â
âYouâve said that already.â
âIâll keep saying it until you get it in your head.â
âTrust me. Itâs in my head. How can it not be when you keep nagging me?â
Despite my grumbles, I found a strange comfort in his nagging. In a world where everything else was changing, Rhys remained wonderfully, unrelentingly and I never wanted that to change.
His hand lingered on my forehead for another moment before he dropped it and pulled away, and oxygen returned to my lungs.
âSo.â Rhys leaned back and laced his fingers behind his head. He didnât look at me as he asked, âWho do you usually bring up here?â
âWhat?â I cocked my head, confused. I never brought anyone up here.
âTwo chairs.â He nodded at mine, then the one he was sitting in. âWhoâs the second one for?â His tone was casual, but a tight current ran beneath it.
âNo one. There are two chairs becauseâ¦â I faltered. âI donât know. I guess I hoped Iâd find someone I wanted to bring up here one day.â I had silly, romantic notions of me and mystery guy sneaking up here to kiss and laugh and talk all night, but the chances of that were growing slimmer by the minute.
âHmm.â Rhys was silent for a second before he said, âYou want me to leave?â
âWhat?â I sounded like a broken record.
Maybe the hit to my head scrambled my brains because Iâd never been this inarticulate.
âSeems like this is your secret spot. Didnât realize I was intruding when I came up here,â he said gruffly.
Something warm cascaded through my stomach. âYouâre not intruding,â I said. âStay. Please. I could use the company.â
âOkay.â
And that was that.
I couldnât hold back a smile. I didnât think I would enjoy sharing this space with anyone else, but I liked having Rhys here with me. He didnât feel the need to fill the silence with unnecessary small talk, and his presence comforted me, even if he irritated me, too. When he was near, I was safe.
I stretched my legs out and accidentally knocked over the empty wine bottle, which rolled across the floor toward Rhys. I bent to pick it up at the same time he did, and our fingers brushed for a second.
No, not even a second. A millisecond. But it was enough to send electricity sizzling up my arm and down my spine.
I yanked my hand away, my skin hot, as he picked up the bottle and placed it on the other side of his chair, away from both our legs.
Our brief touch felt indecent, like we were doing something we werenât supposed to do. Which was ridiculous. We hadnât even planned it. It was an accident.
The clouds shifted, unblocking part of the moon, and light spilled across the tower, illuminating part of Rhysâs face. It appeared grimmer than it had a moment ago.
Even so, he was beautiful. Not in a perfect, Greek god sculpture kind of way, but in a pure, unabashedly masculine way. The dark stubble, the small scar slashing through his eyebrow, the gunmetal eyesâ¦
My stomach did a slow roll as I struggled not to focus on how alone we were up here. We could do anything, and no one would know.
âHeard weâre leaving next week,â Rhys said. I mightâve imagined it, but I thought he sounded strained, like he, too, was fighting back something he couldnât quite control.
âYes.â I hoped my voice didnât come across as shaky as it did to my own ears. âMy grandfatherâs condition is steady for now, and I need to wrap up my affairs in New York before I move back.â
I realized my mistake before the words fully left my mouth.
I hadnât told Rhys about Nikolaiâs abdication yet, which meant he didnât know about my plans to move back to Athenberg. Permanently.
Rhys stilled. âMove back?â He sounded calm, but the storm brewing in his eyes was anything but. âHere?â
I swallowed hard. âYes.â
âYou didnât mention that, princess.â Still calm, still dangerous, like the eye of a hurricane. âSeems like an important thing for me to know.â
âItâs not finalized, but thatâs the plan. Iâ¦want to be closer to my grandfather.â That was partly true. Heâd recovered nicely from his hospital visit and he had people monitoring him around the clock, but I still worried about him and wanted to be close by should anything happen. However, as crown princess, I was also required to return to Athenberg for my queen training. I was already behind by decades.
Rhysâs nostrils flared. âWhen were you planning to tell me this?â
âSoon,â I whispered.
The palace was keeping Nikolaiâs abdication under tight wraps, and I wasnât supposed to talk about it until closer to the official announcement. I couldâve told Rhys I was moving back to Eldorra earlier using the excuse I just gave him, but Iâd wanted to pretend everything was normal for a while longer.
It was stupid, but my mind had been all over the place lately, and I couldnât make sense of my own actions.
Something flickered in Rhysâs eyes. If I didnât know better, I would think he was âWell, now you can finally be rid of me,â he said lightly, but his face might as well have been etched from stone. âIâll talk to my boss on Monday, get the paperwork started for the transition.â
My breath, my heart. Everything stopped. âYouâre resigning?â
âYou donât need me here. You have the Royal Guard. I resign, or the palace releases me from my contract. Same ending.â
The thought hadnât crossed my mind, but it made sense. The palace had hired Rhys because they hadnât wanted to pull any Royal Guard members away from their family when I was living in the U.S. Now that I was moving back, they didnât need a contractor.
âBut Iâ¦â
Rhys and I may not have gotten along in the beginning, but now, I couldnât imagine not having him by my side.
The kidnapping. Graduation. My grandfatherâs hospitalization. Dozens of trips, hundreds of events, thousands of tiny moments like the time heâd ordered me chicken soup when I was sick or when heâd lent me his jacket after I left mine at home.
Heâd been with me through it all.
âSo, thatâs it.â I blinked away the ache behind my eyes. âWe have one more month and then youâll justâ¦leave.â
Rhysâs eyes darkened to a near black, and a muscle jumped in his jaw. âDonât worry, princess. Maybe youâll get Booth as your bodyguard again. Itâll be like old times for you two.â
I was suddenly, irrationally angry. At him, his dismissive tone, the entire situation.
âMaybe I will,â I snapped. âI canât wait. He was the best bodyguard I ever had.â
It was a low blow, and judging by the way Rhys stiffened, it hit its target.
âGood. Then itâs a win-win all around,â he said in a cold, controlled voice. He stood and walked to the exit without looking back.
The door slammed behind him, causing me to jump.
The ache behind my eyes intensified until a stray tear slipped down my cheek. I wiped it away angrily.
I had no reason to cry. Iâd changed bodyguards plenty of times before, and I was used to people leaving. Rhys hadnât even been with me for that long. Booth had been with me for four years, and I hadnât cried when left.
Another tear fell. I wiped that one away too.
Elinâs disapproving voice echoed in my head.
She was right.
I refused to spend my last month of freedom agonizing over Rhys Larsen, of all people. We would return to New York, I would sort my affairs, and I would soak up every minute of my remaining time as a mere princess, not queen to be.
Forget propriety and protocol. If there was ever a time to live my life the way I wanted, it was now.
And if Rhys had a problem with that? Too bad.