Elaine
The numbness on my fingers felt like dust on a dry floor. Holding an ice pack in a single hand to reduce the pain on my elbow was the cause, but I don't mind as long as my victimized elbow doesn't swell.
Yesterday was another Friday of bully Elaine as she is free for the weekends day.
Friday was the worst of all days, contrary to other students I am afraid of it. But I was not vulnerable to bullying, it was a whole different case this week. I was afraid of what he will think of it if he saw me a pathetic excuse of a human who he had been assuming so wise of to kneel her respect without even putting up a fight.
Alex was different, he volunteered to be my partner despite my history. He still was there, the same. And I wished he remained like that, the patience he carries to not fade so that I could bring myself to trust him, to befriend him.
This time I knew I was much more in trouble than I bargained my assumption of. I knew it when the anxiety kicked in when my eyes roamed with each insulting word to search in hope of Alex to not be the viewer among the crowd.
After so many years I actually cared about what someone would think about me. I hated this feeling.
With each second the pain in my chest rose with fastening heartbeats, I wanted to scream at them as they forced the backpack off me, hurting my elbows as I tightened my hold on the strap.
I watched them as they held me by the walls, as they ripped and tore the pages away from the books. I couldn't close my eyes as I saw how ruthless they were, it felt as if hundreds of needles pricked my throat. I wanted to cry, but something stopped me from doing it.
It was my own breathing. I could hear it, I could feel the blood rushing and pumping through my veins, I could hear everything thing yet I couldn't, I know I had a whirlwind of emotions in me yet I wasn't able to name any of it.
And then I felt nothing,
All left, until it was just me. I sat there with my legs crossed, leaning on the wall curled up like a ball.
Cold.
It took me so much strength to collect all my works littered and sprawled across.
Spending the whole night binding and taming the books and pages left me exhausted, I woke up late to do some serious thinking. I know I had a problem this summer vacation when I had this urge to do dark things, constant nightmares, and recalling the unpleasant scenarios was worse than waking up to constant pain and tortures. It ate me.
I know It was not them, I had to fight myself now. The pain was worse than bleeding, sometimes the demons are more terrible when they are invisible. When it's in your head.
The door to my room groaned Diana came into view. I sat up fast shoving the icepack inside the blankets,
"Good morning sleepy head" she smiles as she slowly makes her way to the bed and sits by the edge.
"Morning Diana, you look happy" I raise my brows smirking. Or wish I thought I was, since not being used to use my facial emotions much more than a scowl or frown, I do fall awkward whenever I put on a positive one.
"It's Saturday, you remember right?"
Diana was a designer, fashion designer to precise. But still in the struggle phase. Her dream was to run a boutique and bring a storm down in the world of fashion.
Well, the last part was self said, but her talent was to be praised at a higher platform, her styles were amazing and she is sure to bring about a revolution in the industry. But the problem was the key job she dug for, that'll provide her the catalyst and experience for the future.
The job she had now made her struggle with bills even, but then I introduced her to the world of net Business, thanks to it now her work got finally noticed and she had been called for a talk with a nationwide well-known designer.
I was dragged into this when Diana declared it was a family dinner at their place. And to her, I am the only family. I couldn't say no to her.
"Yup, dinner at a huge house, it's important for your career, wear the dress you made for me on my birthday and act like a girl who can slay the world" I repeated the words she had me memorize since she got the call.
"Oh God, I love you so much" she breathed.
"I promise I won't do anything to ruin this, I get it the first impression of a designer starts off with their appearance, I will do my best to look stunning. But can't assure you about my face, it's going to be the same" I took the hands of the beautiful nervous wreck in front of me.
"Elaine, you are beautiful the way you are, just like your Mother," she said softly, giving a side hug." I am so glad to have you"
I forced a smile. We sat there talking, not much in particular. Then it was time.
She left after the bonding period.
The other half of the day went in staring at all those youtube tutorials that enhance one's beauty with layers of foundation.
When it came to fashion I was not clueless, I knew much more than I would like to admit. With all those magazines Diana subscribes and knowledge that I gain from her while watching runway shows on t.v stuck to my head.
That's how my brain worked. I see. I learn. Even if I refuse to, it's just stuck.
I cannot undo them.
This season's fashion roar was all about florals and metallics.
I can name the brands. The launch of the new week's edition. I can add up a few hacks to my life as well.
But adapting them to my regular school life is a mistake and risk I won't make or take. My clothes and I are fine being attacked with food, paint, and other mysterious stuff. But not the one that Diana makes with the effort of sweat and sometimes blood when she gets her fingers pricked by them.
I stood in front of the mirror observing and admiring my work. I wore a black pinafore dress with a sleeveless turtle neck shirt beneath. The dress reached mid-thighs, so short of a dress for a girl who is lazy to shave legs. It was cold so I threw in a pair of black stockings as well.
I pulled my hair into a high pony, my hair felt smooth like that of in those commercials as I have used half an hour straightening it. The pony was so high that its ends tickled my neck. Leaving few loose strands to frame my face and doing classy yet striking makeup, as the girl on youtube called it, and throwing a black ankle-length boot, the old one that I renovated this evening, I was ready.
Diana will be pleased, I thought. This night I know I was gorgeous. Makeup has the power.
"Are you rea-" Diana stood at the door gawking at me.
"Elaine, I am so bagging this job" I grin.
"My exact intention" I give her once over, she wore a business suit in a beige, white shirt, and painful-looking heels, her hair was in a bun. She does look like a professional woman.
"Let's go we're getting late"
It was 7 when we pulled over the gate of the house, it was not exactly a mansion. But two-story modern building mostly made up of glass. It has that robotic aura like in those of iron man movies. I know a bad example but deal with it.
On walking inside it was the same, white walls, expensive arts hanging on the walls and luxury carpet to remind visitors of money.
A beautiful lady with a red body fitted dress came with a commercial smile to greet us. Her appearance needs no introduction, she was the one.
"So glad to see Diana, finally the face behind all those fascinating works" she semi-hugged and peck kissed her on the cheek.
I wanted to roll my eyes, but Diana's happiness was more than this, so.
"Oh my goodness, who is this gorgeous doll." She came to me and I smiled, with glittering eyes. I wanted to wipe that peck off my cheek. Yuck.
"That's Elaine, she's like my daughter. But before that she's my best friend, without her I wouldn't be where I am" she said proudly, I was spellbound, I never allowed her to call me her daughter. But today I saw how proud she was of something that I hardly did.
It made me feel small. After all that she went through because of me, yet she was so generous and kind.
"Let's go inside, my husband and son are already in the dining room. Shall we?" the lady I had failed to extract the name guided us. While walking I saw Diana nervously play with her fingers, without a second thought I grab hold of those shaking hands as we made our way.
I could feel her gaze from the side, I smiled as she relaxed under my grasp.
The door to the dining hall was opened by a middle-aged man in uniform, but the sight that awaited me there was not that I was prepared for.
Besides the pepper gray-haired man in the suit was the boy I would like to avoid for the rest of my life, Tyler wren sat there with his eyes glued to his mobile, there was a chance I could run away. Right now before he sees me.
But it was too late.
His gaze shifted, our eyes locked. It took him a while to realize it was me, the flicker of recognition was all it needed for my stomach to flip of nervousness.
His eyes widened as he took in my appearance. I shifted uncomfortably, I refused to meet his intimidating stare that was piercing through me heating up my cheeks.
"Nice to meet you ladies" the strong voice of the broad shouldered man in an expensive suit snapped me back from the trance I was falling in.
Greetings were exchanged from both sides, while I struggled to maintain eye contact and an easy-going smile. It was as if I was the only thing that could hold myself. I wanted one night, just one night to live. But it was too much to ask.
We sat for dinner when Tyler's mom had pleasantries with Diana, in turn, Tyler's vision never left my face, like observing my every move, every breath, and every thought.
"So Elaine dear, Diana here mentioned you and Tyler go to the same school, do you know each other?" Mrs. Wren's question made the air in my lungs go way more rigid than it already was.
The truth would have been saying why of course, I know your son more than you do, I know all his secrets and hobbies, do you know his favorite pastime is hitting people and watching tutorials on how to make someone's life hell?
But instead, I say, or was about to say yes when he cut me off,
"No," he said smirking, I gripped the spoon in my hand as if it could save me from further humiliation.
"I would have remembered such face if I had come across" he added.
The dinner passed with me holding my barf, the appetizing ribeye steak, chicken parmesan, and delicious desserts lost their value to fear.
"Tyler, why don't you take Elaine on a tour of the house, I bet she will get bored to death with all the business talk we're about to do" Mrs. Wren's advice made me jerk over my seat, and with wide eyes, I started hyperventilating.
"It-its okay Mrs. Wren, I am fi-"
"Why not" he smiled like prey at his victim at me as he stood up brushing his blazer, It made me sick to the stomach.
With wobbling feet I got up taking the hands that he offered, how can a person with such soft hands be so vile.
As we strolled out his hold on my hand became painful, my attempt to free them from his clutch only made his grip monstrous.
His stride made me almost trip, by the time he released me we were on his garden, freshly trimmed grass under my boots, and the calm breeze of the night did nothing to help my nerves.
He turned around with his back facing me, hand on his pockets. He was so confident of himself and I hated that about him so much. I was envious of his confidence, the one I can never pull out.
"You made a mistake by coming here" his smooth words were calculated.
"I know, I was not aware it was your home" there was no reason to define myself, but still I did.
A sudden rush of air and in quick seconds I was pressed against him, he held me by the injured elbow as I bit my lips to hold back tears.
"No matter what you apply on your face, you are still ugly" he spat the words at me,
"What've I ever done to you, why do you hate me so much" I wanted to scream at him, show him how broke and angry I was because of him. But it came out more like a whine.
I so wanted to slap that smirk out of his face, literally.
"I think I am going to use this opportunity against you," he says casually as if talking about the weather and not threatening me.
"Wh-what do you mean?" I stutter giving away my insecurity as I have always in front of him.
"You'll now do anything I say" he saw me dead in the eye "just for knowledge, I am close to my mom and I know what this job means for her," he said mentioning Diana.
"You won't do anything as such" I glared,
"Try me" he whispered, his chocolate brown orbs flicker towards my lips for a milliseconed, and then he released me.
My feet stumbled, in order to regain my balance as he left me standing there in the cold night. I hugged myself as the first drop of tear made its way. How can he be so cruel as to blackmail me? But above that, I hated the fact that how could've I been so naïve in the past as to have fell for this devil.
***
Hey guys, we are almost nearing 500 votes and it feels so great and unreal.
I dedicate this chapter to fictionalonly22 for being the first reader to comment that she liked this book a lot and encouraged me to not give up on it. Thank you so much love.