Elaine
His laugh was beautiful. Like the swift wave of the sea, smooth and demanding, demanding of attention. It had a life of itself like they were precious and rare.
It was all I could muster up though the whole class turned to notice us. Mr.Carmen glared but said nothing. He was too lazy for interrogation and detention.
Alex cleared his throat.
"Mr. Carmen?" He said aloud. My eyes widened.
"Yes, Mr.white?" He said adjusting his specs on the bridge of his nose.
Alex winked at me before turning his undivided attention to the teacher in question. Silence befalls as everyone awaits the intention of Alex, crucially I pinch the side of his jacket before I could tug at it and warn him to stop-
"You might wanna check your fly once"
He.Did.Not.
The thick quietness multiplied an octave high.
A moment later sprinkle of mirth kept slipping
Then the roar of laughter resonated through every corner.
Luckily we or more like he was not thrown out of the class. Mr. Carmen's face was red with embarrassment. I hate to admit, it felt good.
No. Not the way he was made fun of. I know how much it hurts or more like did. Now I am used to it.
It felt good because Mr. Carmen did get a dose of what I went through all this time. He knew. I saw him turn blind towards the vandalized boards and hateful notes.
My locker was right in front of his office.
The last bell rang as students rushed out of class. I got up to do the same. But my reason was to stay away from a certain boy.
I was afraid. After so many days I was. He was nice to me and I believed. A little.
"Wait up. Elaine!" I could hear his running footsteps behind me.
I kept walking as he joined me.
"You need a ride back? I know you live just a few blocks away" he offers.
"I like to walk" I decline as I play with the strap of my bag.
"You do? I like to walk too" he smiles. I wished to return that smile, genuinely equal and with comfort.
But when you smile you are happy, when you are happy you begin to cook expectations. And expectations lead to disappointment.
So I nod instead.
I am such a coward.
The corridor was at the time being almost empty. Just a few students from soccer practice loitered around in their sweaty jerseys. I spotted Tyler among them. As a wise person, I start walking faster. In the opposite direction. I decided to avoid a heart-to-heart conversation. That's why.
Alex notices this and joins me.
"Do you and Tyler have a history or something? I know literally you guys do. I see him in the history class. But you do understand what I mean right?" he asks, flicking the stray hair out of his face with a jerk of his neck, his eyes deep and distant, like he was forcing this conversation on himself
I bite my lip as I come to a halt. We were now outside as the wind blew my hair in all possible positions. "You know, Tyler wants to be friends with you" I start, gnawing at the inside of my lips as I wait for him to return my statement with his input.
"Oh yeah?" He narrowed his eyes, the blue orbs darkening in a shadow of challenge, voice so deep and strong all of a sudden, taking me aback. The voice of enigma.
I stumbled my next word out, turning away from those penetrating gazes.
"He does. I don't ". I pulse the iciness in my tone, the rudeness in it prominent, mixed with denial towards his efforts to acquaint with me. It worked with most of them. It kept them away who fake concerned for me.
But to my surprise He shoved his hands inside the bulkhead of his pockets, nodding his head he started walking. Slowly. With me.
"What are you doing?" I ask pushing the strands of my hair behind my ears.
"We are walking home" He mumbles, his gaze stiffly ahead on the road.
Heaving a heat of breath I cross my arms across my chest. Stopping in my path as he confused turns to witness my discarded walk a couple of steps behind him.
"So now you don't like walking?" He questions, raising a confident brow. Even an action as simple as that was so heavenly on him.
"Why don't you understand?" Sniffing, I planted the sole of my feet flatter by the side path.
"Understand what?" He doesn't appear confused. More like he seems to enjoy my little fit.
"We can't be friends" I declared. Strangely I felt a sting my throat as I said it like it wasn't something my heart wanted while my logical part encouraged me.
I lifted my eyes to look at him. He hadn't said a word after that, kept analyzing me like I was a piece in a museum. It made me uncomfortable to be scanned like that, no one ever did that to me before. It was either a hateful glare or a laugh at my face.
But not, just watch.
And then after what felt like an eternity, a single word rolls out of his lips.
"Why?"
Inhaling I grabbed the chance with both hands and waved it between us.
"Look at you and me" I point out as he obediently does so as I said.
"Yes, I am a boy and you are a girl. I see that much" he deadpanned as I scowled. He indeed was entertaining himself by riling me up.
"Look at your clothes" I nudged my chin with a gesture "there's not a single wrinkle in them. And then observe mine. The colors are fading. The green of my hoodie soon might turn grey" shamelessly I wondered aloud. Then I realized it was impossible for green to turn grey. But still, it was an example that he should understand.
But.
When he proceeded to rapidly shrug off his crisp blazer with his eyes fixed challengingly on mine is when I went dumb.
He let it fall on the dusty ground, I could even see the glossy logo of Chanel by its collar. Then he fists the sides of his maroon polo shirt, crumpling it disorderly as my lips parted unconsciously.
What was he doing?
When he was satisfied by his work he ruffled his hair, misplacing its style as he took a step ahead.
"We are the same now" confidently he bolted those words on me.
Say something.
Conscience scolded me. But that's all it did. There was nothing else helpful about it.
So I closed my eyes and counted on till three.
Then I broke into a half run half walk marathon. He did the same. I don't know why I was being so childish. But for once it felt like breathing. Like being of my age.
I was stubborn and wanted to outrun him so It won't feel like we walked together. But it turned into entirely something else.
Till we reached my home we were out of breath. I was gasping for air when he was a lot more stable than me. Boys and their sports.
He could have stopped at his turn, but the guy said he was a gentleman and wanted to accompany a lady in a proper and gentlemanly manner to her home.
His terms, not mine.
When I finally was able to hold myself I stole a peek at him from sideways. He had that weird genuine smile. Again.
"Good luck with getting your car back from school," I say still panting.
"I don't regret it. The car can wait but a run with Elaine Winters cannot" I roll my eyes. It's a reflex to cheesysism. Yeah, I happened to coin. I had ample time in my hand.
"Bye Alex" emphasizing his name I sighed. Even after all that he did, I yet was on a mission to change his mind. Even if I gave in, they won't let him. He was among them. Maybe if I kept my ignorance of an attitude up all the time he will eventually go away. So I don't look back hoping that he left.
Moving inside the little gate I walk across the mini yard. I rang the bell and soon the door was pulled open.
The refreshing face of Noah Ross greeted me. The only boy I trust. My only friend. We both were stuck because of the lack of choice we had. The zenith of being an outcast.
Noah. He was well- a cheerful person. Religiously Cheerful.
But he looked disturbed and angry today. Contrasting. He was fuming. Then he hugged me.
"She was a bitch and karma will bite her in the ass. Trust me" I say as I embraced his lean frame with my free hand. Those bad words always helped him.
"I-i-i know," he says releasing me from his bear-crushing hold. A smile blooming.
I hardly cared for anyone, but this boy was just too much to resist. We know how to handle each other. In one way or another, we know what goes on in each other minds.
"Co-c-come inside, feel l-l-like your own place" he says as I roll my eyes. When I shift to face the door. I spot Alex leaving.
Was he here all this time?
I don't ponder much about him next. I had a broken soul to fix, and my innocent ears had a lot of new swear terms to learn this fine day. Noah was two years younger than me, but he had a sense of making the foulest of mafia men to shame by the use of his mouth. He can curse in languages.
It's the only time he stutters less.
Noah and I move to my room where he expresses his desire to fill her now ex-girlfriends shampoo with hair removal serum. The guy was sure violent in thoughts.
I met Noah during my therapy sessions. I met him in all those awful therapy classes. It was obvious since he was the son of my therapist and she has her clinic right beside her home.
We immediately clicked on.
We both hated the therapist from the bottom of our hearts.
I sparsely tolerated her for one hour, I couldn't imagine living under the same roof with her. Despite that Noah loves her mom. Who doesn't?
I used to love my mother too. More than anything else. I still do.
But Noah's mother was different. She nagged because that was her job.
Noah though assures me that she never asks him questions like what's wrong? Do you want to talk about it? Or
We are there for you's. When he gets constipated.
The normal household stuff I guess.
Noah was always a shy kid owing to his stuttering speech disorder because of which he was mostly homeschooled. So more or less I was the only friend he has.
But his dirty mouth was still a mystery to me. It made me horrifically wonder how would have he turned out if he had more than someone like me to socialize with.
"You know what? Let's forget her. She never deserved you. If she was concerned with the way you talk and not with your heart, she was not worth it." I say looking at him straight in the eye. He relaxes. I don't, it was awkward to advise him when I can't even grasp the meaning behind my confrontation.
"y-y-ou are right" he pauses. "So w-what are we going to do next?"
"Since Ice cream won't help you with break up owing to the fact that you're a guy" he nods deeply with a crown of the crease on his forehead.
"And we are strictly against alcohol" double nods. As I smiled. I raised him well.
"We are going to smoke away from your pain instead" I declare. Not that well I guess.
He arcs his brows, his boat lips slimming "D-do we even know how to?"
"There's always a start for everything," I say while dragging myself out of the room. Then I poke my head back into the room. My hair falling over my face angrily.
"But first let me steal some cigarettes from downstairs"
With that, I made my way down to the cabinet when a message beeped. I plucked out my phone from the forgotten end of my hoodie.
4:37
Hi, got your number from mom ;)
-A
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