Chapter 34: chapter 34

Chapter Thirty-FourIt felt like the sun had risen inside him. Yash could feel the warmth and glow build until it was a bloody inferno burning him up from the inside out. Her lips were soft and giving under his own and he could do nothing but give in to their temptation. All rational thought fled his mind as she fisted his shirt in her hands and used them to shove him back against the wall, plastering herself to him. Her hands moved to curl in his hair and deepen the kiss. Yash felt his glasses slip of his face and land God knows where. He couldn’t have cared less. He was lost in her, her taste, her smell, and the feel of her slim, lithe body in his hands. It was all he’d ever wanted. Maya. She was all he’d ever wanted.As quickly as it had died on them, the lights flared back to life. Bloody generators. Maya flew out of his still grasping arms, a shocked look on her face.“I’m s-s-sorry,” she stammered, taking an uneven step away from him. Yash shoved his hands back into his pockets and stared at her, his face impassive now. He was damned if he’d let her see his ravaged, bleeding heart. Every time he touched her, he remembered what he’d always wanted and every time she shoved him away, he remembered that he’d never have a chance at it.Her phone rang and she glanced down at the display. Amma, he saw the name flash. Guilt speared across her face, clear enough for him to read even if they’d still been standing in pitch darkness. And he knew the moment of weakness was over. She disconnected the call and straightened to face him. “That should never have happened. It was a –““Mistake. I know,” he finished for her. They stared at each other, neither willing to say what they really wanted to. A knock on the door had Yash breaking eye contact with her and turning towards the door of his cabin. “Saab, sab theek hain?” The elderly security guard stood there with a humongous torch light in his hand. “Bijli chali gayee tho socha aake check kar loon.”Yash nodded curtly, his body still reacting to that bloody kiss and Maya’s presence in his cabin. “Sab theek hain, Deenanath Bhaiya,” Maya said warmly, coming forward to smile at the old guard. Deenanath Bhaiya? Yash looked from her to the guard who was beaming at her in a paternal manner. “Aapne dinner kiya kya? Missus ne abhi tiffin bheja hain. Aa jao.”“Arrey nahin.” Maya laughed, clasping her stomach with both hands. “Aapne lunch mein itna khila diya ki dinner ki to chance hi nahin.” His eyebrows shot up at the conversation. She’d eaten her lunch with the security guard? Why? Were the people in the office being nasty and snooty with her? Were they refusing to eat with her?Yash’s brows lowered ferociously at the thought startling the poor security guard who lost his smile. “Chalta hoon bitiya,” he muttered and managed an awkward salute in Yash’s direction before shuffling out of the room. “Why did you have lunch with him? Didn’t anybody else want to eat with you?” The older man’s shoulder’s stiffened, clearly having caught the words and understood the meaning behind them. Yash felt shame wash through him but before he could clarify what he had meant, Maya exploded. “God, you are such a prick.” “Excuse me?” Yash stiffened.“Why did you have to do that and make him feel small? Would it kill you to be nice to someone who isn’t breathing the rarefied air you’re so used to?” With every word out of her mouth, Yash could feel himself stiffening up even further. Was this really how little she thought of him?  “You and your mother believe that you’re somehow better than the rest of the world just by existing. You destroyed me and my family without a thought all those years earlier and today, you hurt another sweet, gentle man who has done nothing but be nice to me when he needn’t have. But what would you know about being nice? That look you put on Deenanath Bhaiya’s face today? It’s the same look your mother put on my father’s face all those years ago when she told him that she was begging him not to saddle her precious, perfect son with his cripple of a daughter.” She was raging now, words spilling out of her without any thought. Yash wanted to say something, anything, to correct her misapprehension but he couldn’t find the right words.“This cripple,” she spat the words at him. “Didn’t need you then and sure as hell doesn’t need you now. You make me sick. I make me sick. Because despite all of that, despite the fact that you practically beggared me and my family, despite the fact that you walked away from me without a single thought when I was lying broken and bleeding in a hospital bed, this sick twisted body of mine still wants you.” Her lips twisted in a bitter smile. “But don’t worry, Mr. Yash Malhotra. My brain is back in gear now. Watching you treat the man who’s guarded your office doors for ten years like crap has reminded me of all the reasons why I should stay as far away from you as possible.”The words landed against his skin like poisoned darts, finding their target with unerring precision. “You and your mother are toxic. You trample over and destroy everyone and everything you come across. But you know what?” She stepped closer and faced him. “You didn’t destroy me. Not then and not now.” “Maya-“ A crunching sound had him looking down. Maya had taken a deliberate step forward and stepped on his fallen glasses. As he watched, she ground her foot down so the slim, metal frame bent further.He didn’t say another word as she slung her laptop bag on her shoulder and walked out, head held high and not a single backward glance in his direction. The door slammed shut behind her.He looked down at his broken spectacles, the cracked glass and bent frame. And then he looked around at the cabin that just minutes before had resounded with bitter accusations and past hurts.As he stood there alone and in the shadows, he realised that for some reason this deep, bottomless silence hurt a lot more.