No, he was definitely not a masochist.
In fact, despite having suffered a lot in the army for a number of years, he was still scared of pain.
But if he had to choose, he would rather suffer pain than lose her, or become totally estranged to her.
That type of pain would kill him.
âYouâre the only one that can do this to me.
If I tried my best to pay off what I owed you, it wasnât because I wanted to cut things off cleanly.
It was because I wanted you to give me another chance, so I can be the man you deserve.
I really like you, Lucindaâ¦â
His voice broke in the last part.
He coughed, his throat feeling dry.
His shoulders trembled slightly, but he made sure his back remained straight.
âYou Like me?â
Lucinda looked at him and scoffed.
She was unaffected by those small words.
âDonât you think itâs three years late to say that? I donât care about it anymore.
Your Love means nothing to me now.
And you want me to give you another chance? You must be going mad!
âIâm sorry!â Nathaniel wretched out with obvious pain in his voice.
He clenched his fists to control himself and sniffed.
Then he closed his eyes tight and said, âJust whip me, Lucinda.
Because thereâs no way Iâm going to sign.
â
Lucinda frowned and raised her eyebrows.
âDid the fever you had these days fry your brains? Youâre still very weak and youâve barely recovered.
Do you really think youâd be able to withstand it if I whip you?
Nathaniel sniffed again, fighting off the strong desire to just break down and cry.
He straightened his neck and said, âI donât care.
Just whip me as many times as you want until you feel better.
â
Lucinda squinted at his back.
Well then, since he was insisting, she had to give him what he wanted, right?
She grabbed the two ends of the belt with both hands and straightened it.
Nathaniel gritted his teeth and mentally got ready for the pain.
Seeing how stiff he looked, Lucinda decided to tease him.
She clicked her tongue and said, âThis shirt youâre wearing.
I might ruin it, and youâd have to by a new one.
Also, it wonât be very fun whipping you with it on, right?â
Like a good manservant, Nathaniel immediately took off his shirt and threw it on the coffee table nearby.