I'm starting to take my parents' fears about the sacrificial virgin thing a little more seriously. As I close the door to my car I realize it's the day before Halloween. We'll be up in the mountains with next to no cell reception tonight and Halloween night. November first will be a happy sight to see for me, I've never gone longer than a few hours without using my phone. I'm going to try and make the most out of the next few hours as tech-less as they may be. It'll be fun to get some time with the lads, we haven't hung out together in a while so I'm pretty excited to see them and meet their girlfriends. Amita and Damien however are convinced this is going to be the trip that makes or breaks Harry and I's relationship. No matter how hard I try and tell them there's no relationship to be had they aren't trying to hear me.
"Watching the sunset together alone on a mountain," Damien had gushed earlier this morning as I packed my bag and talked to Amita and him on three-way, "It's so romantic."
I rolled my eyes before informing him that it's a Halloween trip so technically it's more creepy than romantic and that we wouldn't be alone. All of the boys and their girls would be there as well, not to mention Niall would be solo since his last resort date cancelled at the last minute.
Amita took that as her chance to cut in chirping knowingly, "It's practically a couple's trip Bailey. He's probably just testing the waters to see if you're interested. You know these celebrity types hate rejection, if you give him the sign he'll go for it. Trust me."
Her words echo in my ears as I arrive at Harry's door. Slinging my backpack over my shoulder I turn the nob to enter the house like I usually do.
As I walk in I start to yell a greeting but my words backpedal into my mouth as I take in the scowling face in front of me. Blonde tresses are piled high on her head in a sexy yet sloppy style, her otherworldly green eyes glare at me, full pink lips in a near snarl. I want to speak but the color of her eyes is so unusual they have me captivated.
"I said, who are you and what's your business here? Say something before I call security," she demands, a thin hand on her equally boney hip.
I gather my wits and mirror her stance before responding, "I'm here to see Harry. We're going away together for a couple of days. My name's Bailey Duncan." I know exactly why I made our trip seem like more than it is but I refuse to acknowledge it. Instead I take in her expression and the way it changes slightly at the mention of my name.
She scoffs lightly before turning away from me, the skirt of her olive skater dress flitting in the wind. I watch her disappear and reappear shortly after with Harry in tow, a huge smile on his face.
"I've talked about Bailey a million times Hannah," Harry says with a laugh, clearly responding to a previous statement she made, "How are you B?"
With his full attention directed at me I milk it for all it's worth smiling at him sweetly as he approaches and wraps me in one of those award winning hugs. "Way better now," I say just loud enough for eavesdropping ears to hear.
The dimple bearing gaze I'm greeted with when he releases me nearly stops my heart but I beg it to keep on trucking. "I'm glad to hear it," he smirks then throws a hand in the air absentmindedly, "I'm such an idiot I should introduce you two. Hannah Forthright this is Bailey Duncan, Bailey this is Hannah my assistant."
Suddenly I like this Hannah girl a lot better even if she is still giving me a dirty look. As long as she keeps things cordial I can too because as quiet as it's kept these hands stay up to date.
"Hi," she chimes, faking a smile that I return as I nod in response.
Harry looks back and forth between us as he takes in our staring contest each of us just waiting for the other to make a wrong move. I don't know where her hostility comes from but I know exactly where mine does even if that place scares me half to death.
"Okay," Harry says awkwardly, "Maybe we should go."
I nod turning towards the door, I get my hand on the handle when I hear him telling Hannah to take thorough messages of any important calls and that he'd take care of them when he returns and to remember to turn the alarm on while she's there. Instead of staying any longer than I should so I can be nosey I walk out the front door and down the pathway to his driveway where his Range Rover sits in all it's glistening silver glory. I've never been in a Range before let alone his so this ride should be a fun one. Halfway to the car the lights flash, the doors unlock, and the trunk opens so I know Harry's outside with me. I decide once we get on the road I'll ask him about Hannah staying at his place while he's gone. Curiosity might've killed the cat but it only piqued my interest.
Sitting my backpack in the trunk I close it softly. The absolute last thing I need is to slam it and break something, as unlikely as it seems it'd be just my luck. I hear Harry laugh as he approaches with a cooler to add to the colossal amount of junk already in the trunk.
"You don't have to touch it like you're afraid of it you know," he says, his words sounding sexier than he probably meant them to.
I watch his muscles contract as he lifts the cooler filled with, what I can only assume is, ice into the trunk. He looks good in his all black ensemble featuring hiking boots, skinny jeans and a sleeveless shirt. It looks like he ripped the sleeves off himself which I wouldn't put passed him.
As I reach for the door again to close it his hand falls over mine to help me. A light groan breezes past his lips as we slam it shut and our eyes connect.
"See what I mean," he breathes, his body heat and body in general are much too close for my liking. His hand closes around mine, our fingers lacing oddly as I grip the door handle for dear life.
Amita's words play in my head again forcing me to react against the magnet pulling our faces closer together. I end up doing what any woman would do in my situation. Instead of handling myself like an adult I nod like a weirdo and rush around to my side of the car as inconspicuously as possible. I'm sure that I failed miserably at being sly since my heart is racing a mile a minute as I buckle my seatbelt however I take solace in knowing I'm safe from making a mistake I can't take back. I watch him in the side mirror as his head drops, he shakes it slightly then slides his hand through his curls and walks around to the driver's seat.
As he hops into his seat I paste a serene smile on my face that matches his and makes me laugh, quickly enough he follows suit. Clearly we both felt whatever that was out there, no imagining it nor denying it. The real question is whether we're going to address the elephant in the Range or not.
"Niall's riding with us so we have to pick him up. His place isn't far," Harry says starting the car.
Obviously we aren't addressing our little whatever that was so I push it to the back of my mind. "That's fine with me. It's your car captain you decide where it goes."
He smiles as we breeze past the security guard at the gate reminding me of my questions about Hannah. I might as well ask them now since I'd be too embarrassed to ask in front of Niall.
"So about Hannah," I start but he quickly interrupts.
"Yeah, I'm sorry about her. She gets a little protective over me when it comes to new people. People she's never met I guess I should say."
It's not surprising with the way she damn near exposed her claws and fangs to me. However it does have me pretty interested in why she would need to be protective, Harry may be overly nice but I don't see him as naive. "Why would she need to protect you?" I ask without thinking.
He breathes out as if he's debating on how to answer. "When you're in my position or one like it you tend to run into people who want to use you for one thing or another. I've had people I call a friend use me for money, fame, girls, whatever and it sucks. Sometimes you get so blinded by the idea that they're your friend that you can't see their true intentions so that's where Hannah comes in."
My breath hitches hearing someone hurt him but mostly because the person he described could easily fit me if he finds out about Fresh Start the wrong way. I'm extremely glad now that I talked to Jordan.
"You've known her for a while I'm assuming?" I question as blasé as I can.
He nods, making a turn down a wide tree-lined street. "She's been my assistant for a couple of years now. She's professional and efficient, and pretty sweet once she warms up to you."
"I'm not worried," I say before I think about the way the words may come across. Trying to recover I ask, "She house sits for you while you're away?"
Pulling to a stop outside of a modern mansion with classic touches he whips out his phone, to txt Niall I presume. "Normally yes, why?"
I shrug as Niall comes out of the house a wide grin on his face. As he makes it closer to the car his arms open wide inviting me into them.
"Just making conversation," I lie as I slide out of my seatbelt and open my door to greet Niall with a huge hug.
"I've missed ya girlie," he says, his words sounding like a melody with the highs and lows of his accent.
"Not possibly as much as I've missed you Nialler," I joke hugging him tighter. I really have missed him and these hugs, they're third on my list to Harry's and my parents'.
I hear the trunk close again grabbing our attention. "If everyone's done I'd like to get on the road before dark."
Niall and I look at each other each of us making a silly face mocking him before falling into laughter. Harry shakes his head groaning at us as he walks around to his seat. He might as well get used to it, there's going to be a lot of it for the next day and a half.
~*~
"What was the point in driving vehicles that can go off road if we're going to hike up the mountain anyway?" I ask, my voice more of a whine than I intended. I almost don't care, my disdain for all things outdoors is that real.
Nura, Louis new girlfriend, raises her hand in agreeance, "I second that." She's a sweet girl, very quiet and reserved and that's saying something coming from me.
"Third it," Astraea, Zayn's girl says, fear of the nature surrounding us clear on her face. She's the most outspoken girl here as far as I've seen which makes her the perfect for Zayn's chill nature.
Liam laughs at us before looking over to his lady Daphne, "I'm guessing you're going to jump ship with the other ladies?"
She gives him a look that says he knows the answer already before coming over to me and placing her arm around my shoulders. "I stand with my girl Bailey here. You boys spent all of that money on cars you don't even use to their full potential."
I smile at her as I push my Ray-Bans up my nose. We bonded over our matching sunglasses and the rest is pretty much history. She's a curvy lady which I love, it helps me not to be so self-conscious around Astra, as she likes to be called, and Nura, both slim models. Each of the girls are beautiful, established, and confident, I can see why the lads like them so much.
"Come on ladies where's your sense of adventure?" Niall queries playfully, "There might be snakes or wolves or bugs but who cares? You're here with five strong lads that have your backs."
Shifting my backpack, Harry insisted he carry, on my back I laugh, "I thought you were supposed to be selling us on the idea Nialler."
"Right," Astra chimes in, "Now I definitely want to get back in the car if you fools are the only protection we have."
Zayn grins at her mischievously before chasing after her around the cars making us all laugh.
"See what you've done?" Harry asks me playful accusation in his voice, "You've started a mutiny."
I shrug my shoulders, "All in a day's work I suppose."
He grins at me revealing his dimples and turning up the heat outside another twenty degrees as Daphne and I take a seat on a couple of flat boulders.
"I guess we could carry you all since you're a bunch of lazy sods," Louis suggests, smiling when he earns a glare from Nura over her huge framed sunglasses.
"Now that's more like it!" Astra exclaims, running back to the group out of breath with Zayn close behind her.
My heart skips two beats at the thought of not being able to be picked up because I'm too heavy. Anxiety spreads it's heat along my spine bringing sweat along with it. I try to balance my breathing as the other girls fearlessly agree to the terms, hopping on their respective boyfriend's backs.
"I'd rather walk," I declare as sassily as possible once I trust my voice, "There won't be any "accidental" grab aÅs as far as I'm concerned."
Standing to my feet I pull my light blue jean high waist shorts down so they aren't crawling up my aÅs and put my Dr. Martens to use walking ahead of the group.
"I doubt if it'd be accidental," Niall jeers causing everyone to laugh.
I turn around to glare at him but catch Harry staring at my butt before he can turn away. His face turns beet red as he slips his sunglasses on.
"You've got dust on you," he mumbles speeding up to walk ahead of me up the rocky terrain.
I swipe my butt absentmindedly but they come off clean and dust free making a smile come to my face.
As we hike we stop periodically and take pictures. It's a beautiful area, rolling hills and trees surround us as far as the eye can see.
My phone's email alert pings with the last of the signal I feel we'll get this high up. It's probably from Jordan at Pebbles Publishing. I called him this morning before I left for Harry's and let him know my terms for taking the deal. He assured me what I wanted was fine and that he'd email me the amended contract. I was and am still extremely glad the pressure's off about the whole ordeal. I don't do well under pressure when the full outcome isn't within my control.
"Whoa," I hear before two strong hands grab me and pull me into a firm chest. I knew it was him but his scent still hits me like a ton of bricks, flooding my senses even more than the smells of the forest.
"What are you trying to kill yourself?" he asks, playfulness in his voice but I can see the alarm in his eyes.
Looking behind him I see everyone's worried faces and the camping supplies he held strewn all over the ground where he must've dropped them. A peek over my shoulder lets me know just how close my wandering mind brought me to death by cliff dive. I have to stop looking it's so high up, I'm getting dizzy.
"No, not that," I answer finally, his hands still gripping my shoulders as if he doesn't believe me, "I just got distracted... thinking... too much on my mind I guess." I try to smile it off but he doesn't return the gesture.
Instead he pulls me further from the edge and closer to the middle of the trail where everyone else has started walking again. Bending down he picks up the supplies he was carrying and reaches out his hand for me to take.
I stare at it in confusion, my eyebrow raised. He can't want me to shake it but I know he doesn't want me to hold it like I'm a child in the store with grabby hands.
"Give it," he insists, shaking his hand in front of me, "Since you seem to not be able to walk in a straight line."
I roll my eyes and start walking completely ignoring his absurdity. However instead of playing games with me he catches up and reaches down intertwining our fingers together, sending a spark from our clasped fingers up to my mouth to silence me from talking crap.
The feelings flowing through me seem clearer in the fresh air, making them harder than ever to ignore. With every step his grip tightens slightly on my hand as if he's checking to make sure I'm still there. The action warms my heart more than him holding my hand does, surprising me.
Trying to distract myself I joke, "You know you're the only person I know who goes hiking in skinny jeans and a fedora."
He laughs, exposing his dimples, "Sweetheart, I'm probably the only person you know who wears skinny jeans and fedoras."
I laugh even harder as I go through the people I know in my head. The only person who would even attempt skinny jeans besides Damien is Berkley and he'd never be caught dead in a fedora. "Very true," I concede my voice getting light as I realize he called me sweetheart. I've never heard the pet name sound so good until he let it fall from his lips. Then again he could read the phone book to me and I'd cream my jeans.
"There you go drifting off again," he laughs, "I'm even happier to be holding your hand now."
I have to laugh at myself on that. "I'm sorry, it's a habit I picked up growing up. My mom likes to rant for hours on end, it paid off to be able to go to another place for a while."
He smiles, "She never noticed?"
"Nah," I shrug, "Too busy trying to get her point across I guess."
The others can be seen cutting through a clearing of trees not too far ahead of us. The area is safely surrounded by fencing so there won't be any repeat cliff jumping incidents.
"She must not have looked in your eyes then," he replies with a small laugh, adjusting our tent bag on his back.
I look up at him, the sun hits his hair so perfectly it looks a few shades lighter. "Why do you say that?"
This time he shrugs, "They look lifeless. It's like you're there but you're not. Every emotion you have can be read in your eyes, they're really expressive."
"Is that how you know when I'm about to have a panic attack?" I ask, suddenly glad he couldn't see them when they were offering up piggy back rides.
He nods, "That and your body language. You tense up like you did earlier."
I try to stop my body from doing it but I can't it's a natural reaction. I tense like a scared cat, all arched backed with tail and fur on end.
"And now," he laughs, annoying me with how well he can read me. "You don't have to be ashamed of having fears B, everyone does."
I nod, the rest of the group is in sight. I have the nagging sensation to slow our pace down to a crawl so we can enjoy more time alone like this. Just us holding hands like it's the most natural thing in the world and talking, the beautiful nature as our backdrop.
"I know," I answer finally as we stop at our camp site.
"Besides," he explains, lowering his voice an octave, "it's not like you need to worry about your figure anyway."
My eyes widen as he walks past me to meet the group. I stand alone for a moment trying to pick my face up from the floor. It's not the first time he's commented on my body, at the end of the day he is a guy, so I shouldn't be shocked. It just feels like everything is new with him no matter how many times they occur. The thrill never dies when I'm around him because every time feels like the first time.
Breathing in the woodsy smell of the trees around us I turn on my heels and head over to the group. The boys and their ladies are paired off in spread out little groups setting their tents and things up. Louis and Nura are almost finished while Astra and Zayn are already done and talking with Daphne and Liam about collecting firewood. Harry, in the short amount of time he's been away from me, is working diligently on our tent and poor Niall's tent is in shambles.
Laughing I walk over to him dropping my bag on the ground beside us. "Nialler I think you're doing this wrong." The tarp for the bottom of the tent is coiled around his ankles like shackles while the tent poles are draped over his head and arms like a snake.
"You think?" he asks sarcastically, shrugging all of the tent supplies from his body in a loud clatter to the ground.
I laugh again shaking my head and remove my sunglasses, placing them on my head. "First you need to move all of the crap from that spot if that's where you're setting it up."
He mulls his eyes then starts the cleanup of twigs and debris from the area. I feel bad for him, he seems really interested in his latest lady friend but she keeps flaking on him. With sweat glistening off of his exposed biceps in his tank top I can't really see what her problem is. He's adorably cute and sweet, not to mention hilarious. The more I think about it the more I dislike this Daisy or Rose or whatever flower child name this bįtch has.
"Perfect," I praise as he finishes up with the last of the twigs. "Now lay the tarp for the bottom down, push the connected poles through the little slots on the sides then pop that sucker up."
"You make it sound so easy," he laughs, flattening the tarp out against the soft grass. "Are you going to help me or just instruct?"
I tap my finger to my chin, turning my mouth up as if I'm thinking about it.
"She better not," Harry interrupts with a slick grin, "Especially when I got no help putting up our shelter for the next few nights."
My eyes roll involuntarily even as I laugh, "I'm literally about to help just because you're talking shįt. I never told you to put it up all by yourself, I was just over here minding Niall's business since he's alone. The poor thing."
"Still standing here," Niall interjects trying to sound offended but failing.
Harry comes a little closer smiling even wider now, his voice dropping lower like it did before. "Do I even get a thank you? First I save you from falling to your death and now you won't have to sleep in the wilderness. You could get attacked by bears or something you know."
I can't tell if he's joking to sell his story or if there really are bears out here. "I could say it but it'd be against my religion."
"Oh sacrilege my favorite pastime," he jokes, his voice sounding so smooth I'm surprised his words didn't pour from his lips like melted chocolate. He's close enough that his scent is surrounding me again but far enough that a breeze can flow between us freely.
That pull is back like gravity has shifted and instead of holding us down it's pushing us together. His eyes look greener surrounded by the woods, they're an unearthly color. I can't tell if they hold the string connecting the two of us but I can't take my eyes off of him.
"So no one is going to help me?" Niall's voice flutters into the moment, popping the bubble surrounding us and making me laugh.
Harry laughs too, a sound I'll never get tired of hearing. Turning to him he tells him to give him a minute before turning back to me and informing me of everyone's whereabouts. "There's a small quarry with a waterfall they're swimming in a few yards that way," he points behind him at an angle, "Just follow the path and you should be fine. If all else fails come back and I'll take you myself. I'm going to help this idiot then we'll come."
I'm a little unsure of whether or not I'll be able to find it, it's like all of this fresh air is making my brain malfunction. Where's my smog filled air and back to back noisy traffic so I can focus? I didn't even realize the others were gone until he mentioned it I'm that out of it.
I must be making a face or he can see it in my eyes that I'm worried from the soft look that takes over his face.
His hand swipes a stray hair from my bun behind my ear comfortingly. "You'll be fine," he assures me, grabbing my shades from my head and placing them on my face correctly, "Just listen for the loudest fůckers in the woods and you'll find them."
I smile at his use of profanity, he doesn't curse too often but when he does it always makes me laugh. Instead of taking up more time soaking up his company like a thirsty sponge I nod and walk in the direction he pointed me in. I hear his and Niall's voices fade more and more the farther I get away from them, leaving me totally alone.
The time by myself is welcomed however and I take a bit more time than necessary to dwell on the pathway. Thoughts swarm my mind trying their best to rush to the front of the line to be considered first. I feel like screaming but with the quiet of the forest everyone is sure to hear me. Every thought is of Harry and I and the relationship that we clearly both want in some capacity. I can't be naïve or oblivious any longer, he's all but told me at this point. But what am I supposed to do with that?
He knows pieces of my life but not enough to understand me fully. The muddy parts of me I hide are still hidden on purpose. He doesn't know the reason everyone I open up to leaves and truthfully neither do I. It's part of why he only sees what I allow and even more so why I'm afraid that he sees into me so well. How do you hide something from a man with x-ray vision?
Ultimately what's holding me back is fear, I'm woman enough to admit it. I could hurt him and that's a responsibility I haven't truly held over any one ever. I don't want to leave him in shambles but more than that, selfishly, I'm afraid he'll leave me that way. Beautiful ruins from a beautiful love that never should've happened.
That's why I resist temptation. We're like two stars crashing into each other, we'll only survive if we fight against it. With the hold he has on me already I can see him ending me, turning my abundance of strength into an abundance of weakness. That's not a risk I can take, not again, I don't think I would survive.
Breathing out the nervous energy I built sitting at what looks like the edge of the world I stand to my feet and take in the sight. Tree tops line the land below me so far back I can't see anything else. It's like someone flew the campground in and dropped it down into the center of the vast forest.
As much as I was dreading being out here I hate to admit I'm actually loving it. I've hardly gotten attacked by any bugs and nothing's crawled on me yet. So far, so good. An excited shriek breaks the serenity of my walk alerting me that I'm close to the water where everyone is. It's a little far out from the campgrounds which is good since animals are attracted to water, especially at night according to the episodes of Naked and Afraid I watched to prep. I may not be naked but I was for damn sure afraid so it counts as far as I'm concerned.
The quarry is beautiful, it almost looks like it belongs in Hawaii rather than California. A tall waterfall splashes down from the edge of a grass and moss covered cliff and into the quarry where the toned bodies of my companions splash around.
"Bailey! It's about time you made it hop in!" Astra yells as soon as she sees me.
Gazing at everyone's physique I get a little self-conscious. I know how hard I worked but everyone else doesn't, they don't know the story behind my stretch marks, my battle scars. Not to mention what they might think if my breast reduction scars are exposed at some point. They aren't as dark as they used to be but do I want to go into the story? I know it's my anxiety talking but it's easier to listen than to worry about it later.
"I'm good," I reply loud enough to be heard over the roar of the waterfall, "I just permed my hair. You know, black girl problems." I laugh trying to signal to them it's okay too and to leave the issue alone. Luckily for me everything works out like I planned and I walk down the short way to plop down on the ground close enough to talk with everyone but far enough that I don't get wet.
Zayn and Astra, as far as I've noticed, seem to have a very playful relationship. She loves bugging and pestering him until he comes out of his shell a bit. Nura and Louis are the same aside from the roles being switched, Louis' the agitator but you can see the fondness in Nura's eyes. Liam and Daphne are very loving, sectioning themselves off from the others for romantic kisses under the waterfall, his arms wrapped around her securely. They all seem to have strong connections which I love to see after the very public break ups the boys all went through. I can't tell if these relationships will last but I like the ladies and they seem to genuinely care about the boys which as a concerned friend is all I can ask for.
Niall flies past me in his swimming trunks before cannon balling into the water and splashing everyone. I laugh at everyone's irritated reactions and his unbothered chuckle as he floats on his back. They turn on me all of the sudden splashing me for laughing until I scoot back into hairy legs that better belong to Harry and not Big Foot.
I look up into his unnaturally green eyes getting lost again. "Hi," I squeak, a shy smile parting my lips.
"Hi," he replies smoothly with a dimple presenting grin. It bugs me more than it should that he's never shaken around me while I'm a bumbling mess. "Why aren't you in the water?"
"You know I just permed my hair a couple of weeks ago," I say standing to my feet. The mental images I was getting looking up at him from that angle were doing unspeakable things to the cherished flesh between my thighs.
"Right," he replies suspiciously, "If I remember your little tutorial, which I'm sure I do, it was very informative, you're far enough out from your perm that you'll need another soon anyway so there's nothing stopping you from having a good time with your friends in the water."
I roll my eyes dramatically not caring for the knowledge I bestowed on him. "Harold-" I start, trying to sound annoyed but stop when he takes his top off and drops it to the ground beside us. His tattoos aren't the only things that cover his chest, sweat that looks so soft it could be mist rests against the smooth tanned skin.
"Save it," he teases squatting down to dig in a bag one of the other boys brought earlier. He pulls out a camera I've seen around his house, it's a Canon sort of like the ones the YouTubers use. "I'm taking pictures for my vacation wall and I want you in them, so scoot."
I glare at him over my sunglasses, "You don't have a vacation wall Harold."
He glares at me right back not backing down in the slightest, "I'm starting one thank you very much. Now will you get in? For me, please?"
I groan loudly and he smiles in success as I bend over to untie my boots. A camera flash startles me as I wiggle out of my first boot. I scowl at him, pursing my lips with a hand on my hip. And in true Harry fashion instead of retreating he pushes forward, loving the challenge, and takes another picture.
Rolling my eyes behind the shield of my sunglasses I let it go and continue to get undressed. My other shoe and socks are next to go then my sunglasses so they don't get lost in the water.
"You're getting in?" Louis asks excitedly from his place in the water.
I nod then point to Harry accusingly, "He's forcing me to. Someone might have to save me if I start drowning or something."
Everyone laughs as if I'm joking even though I'm completely serious. I'm not a great swimmer and most of the time I have bad luck when I'm in the water.
Zayn stops laughing for a moment to advise me, "Most of the water is barely over waist deep Bailey, if you start drowning we're leaving you to it."
His joke gets a rise out of everyone as they go back to messing around in the water. Embarrassment starts to creep on me like it's lurking in the trees but I ward it off and keep undressing. Another camera flash takes my attention and brings it back to the man holding the camera.
I decide to make the most out of his paparazzi photo taking and start to mess around with him, posing and dragging out the removal of my grey crop top. His camera flashes more rapidly once he realizes what I'm doing. He starts telling me to work the camera and make it my bitch which makes me laugh instead.
I take my hair down and shake it out, thankful it's starting to wave from the earlier splash attack. As I drop my shorts to the ground I look up at him through my hair and earn a delayed camera flash from him. The look on his face is a cross between star struck and stunned and it makes me smile widely, glad I can finally affect him the way he affects me.
"Are you done playing paparazzi yet Houdini?" I ask, trying to still my voice. It's been forever since we went swimming last and witnessed each other in this small amount of clothing. As much as I should rush into the water and put some space between us I want to soak up the moment and commit it to memory. With him leaving I won't have any like this for a few months.
He quickly snaps a few pictures of everyone in the water, his first photos of them since he pulled his camera out might I add. "Go ahead in I've got to put my camera away," he replies casually.
I shrug and walk over to the water slowly, partially because I'm a little afraid but mostly because I can feel him watching me. At the edge of the oasis I dip my toe in. the water's cold enough to cool us off from the heat of the day but not so cold it'll be uncomfortable even though we're in a pretty shady spot.
With hesitant steps I wade into the water until I'm on my tip toes and the water is too deep for me to breathe comfortably. I wanted to go under the waterfall but if I take one more step I'm going to have to try and actually swim.
Taking a few steps back into the safer area I hang out with Daphne who's found her way to the side to sunbathe. It's not like she's pale, the farthest thing from it, but according to her you can never have too much sun.
Harry keeps his distance while we're in the water which I'm glad for in a way yet miffed about in another.
I watch him as he wrestles around with Liam in the water trying to dunk him before Liam can do the same to him. They look so carefree. A part of me wonders if the same thoughts about us run through his head or if they're too busy making good time racing through mine.
~*~
I can only tell how long we've been at the water by the dying of sunlight and the prune-like texture of my fingers. After a few too many games of Marco Polo we trudge out of the water and pick our clothes up to rush back to the campsite before dark. The couples, although separated as they collected their things, gravitate towards one another on our walk back leaving Niall, Harry and I to walk together.
The walk back is quiet in our little trio, all of us tired from the day's activities. I'm ready to grab a granola bar from my backpack and hit the hay but knowing the lads they'll want to do something fun since it's the night before Halloween. I can only imagine what they have up their sleeves for tomorrow night, I shudder at the thought.
Like clockwork Harry's arm wraps around my shoulders, his hand rubbing up and down my arm trying to warm me. I act as if the feeling of him being wrapped around me doesn't send butterflies soaring in my stomach and continue to walk like nothing is happening. Even after he stops rubbing he leaves his arm around me, draped lazily over my shoulders until we arrive back at the camp grounds.
We all take turns using the facilities and getting the fire and food going. I decide to clean up last and by the time I'm out the food is ready to go. Harry already has my hot dog made with chili and cheese, no mustard, by the time I sit down beside him.
"Thanks," I whisper, trying not to interrupt Liam telling the group about a charity ball they have to go to a few months from now. I half listen to the conversation figuring it's one of those things when they sell off the "bachelors" of the night to raise money.
I stifle a yawn as Nura surprises me and asks if we have any liquor. I can't imagine her getting turned up as shy as she is but I guess I don't really know her.
Harry laughs and hands me a beer from the cooler to pass down to her. He reaches in again and offers one to me but I shake my head, a disgusted look on my face.
"I forgot you don't like beer," he smiles, "Sorry it's all we've got."
I shrug, stuffing the last of my hotdog into my mouth. It's probably for the best that I keep a clear head, especially with us sharing a tent. I don't need to grab anything I shouldn't in my sleep. Accidentally of course.
"We probably shouldn't give Bailey any alcohol anyway," Louis jests from across the flames.
"Right," Liam laughs, picking up where he left off, "We wouldn't want her trying to figure out how to get us an Emmy for our musical godliness."
My face burns hotter than the campfire as I hide behind my sweater covered hands shaking my head. I was hoping they'd forgotten about that by now but as I hear them fill the girls in on the inside joke I know for certain they haven't.
"In my defense I was extremely intoxicated by that point," I groan, trying to deflect a bit, "Seriously I threw my entire purse in the freezer because my phone wouldn't stop ringing."
Everyone laughs but Harry, he just smiles shaking his head. I can't tell if he's embarrassed for me or not and it makes me nervous. I care about what he thinks. By the time I tune back into the conversation they're talking about their upcoming shows overseas.
"I'm ready to play at home again I'll tell ya that," Niall smiles, his blue eyes looking clear and reflective in the fire's light.
The boys all agree in some capacity as they collect their trash and throw it out.
"I'm excited to see you live again," Astra announces as Niall strums his guitar softly.
The other girls agree almost instantly bringing attention to my silence. "What about you Bailey?" Daphne asks leaning over the arm of her fold out chair to push my arm softly.
The heat from before creeps up my face once again as I speak, "I uh- I've actually never been to a show."
From the amount of gasps I hear you'd think I said I hated them.
Zayn feigns being offended, "How dare you call yourself a fan?"
The group bursts into laughter, all of it too loud for such a quiet night in the woods. The beers are starting to creep up on them and it dawns on me I could end up being the only sober person here.
"Yeah I know. Most of your fans have seen yall more times than they've seen their gyno," I joke, my crass sense of humor peeking out.
Whether it's the liquor or what, everyone laughs, seemingly enjoying the joke. Even Nura whom I assumed would be more wholesome. I guess I shouldn't judge a book by it's cover. Besides she has to have a little edge to her to be with Louis. Harry lets out a laugh that echoes through the trees making me laugh louder as well.
"A good group of our fans have no idea what a gynecologist is let alone what they do," Louis jokes suggesting to the younger part of their fan base.
I smirk, "And you do?"
The shape of his lips quickly matches mine, "Of course. I like to think I'm a bit of an expert where that part of the female body is concerned."
We all laugh as Nura smacks his hand for his dirty joke.
As the night goes on we end up telling scary stories that freak me the hell out. It seems like the more stories we tell the more noises we hear in the surrounding woods. After a loud snap of wood sounds scaring us all we decide to wrap things up and head to bed.
Harry stays behind to make sure the fire is out and I climb into the tent. It's the biggest one they had at the store that wouldn't crowd the space too much. Since Harry knows how my anxiety acts up in tight spaces he had me pick it out. I arrived to his house to find three different mid-sized tents set up in his living room. We ended up camping for "practice" that night after deciding this one caused me the least anxiety.
It seemed so roomy in his living room but now as I listen to the tent unzip the space feels smaller and smaller.
He comes inside and turns to re-zip the flap but stops to ask, "Are you okay with having it zipped?"
"Sure," I squeeze out, my breathing not getting any easier with his close proximity to me. We're both fully dressed and yet I can't stop my heart from skipping beats or my panties from getting wet. It's something so sexy about being confined in here with him. I want to shake the lewd thoughts but I can't.
I watch his silhouette move across the tent and adjust until he's lying stiffly beside me. You could cut the awkwardness with a knife but neither of us says anything. Instead we both try to sleep even though we probably won't get much.
I don't know what made us think we could do this. All of our "close calls" today has made this too weighted. I can't help wondering what's going through his head and if he has any expectations of the night. Especially when we can hear the other couples quiet giggles and sounds of hushed pleasure. I can almost feel the mortification radiating off of Harry's skin and silently hope he can't feel the arousal radiating off of mine. Thoughts of us in acts of passion flash through my head. Him on top of me, his hand covering my mouth so he can have me how he wants without interruption.
I breathe out a shaky sigh and rub my thighs together, trying to calm down. This is not the time for my brain to betray me.
"What's wrong?" he whispers almost instantly.
I immediately still, trying to think of an answer. "I uh- I can't get comfortable dressed like this. I'm used to my pajamas I guess."
We lay in silence for what feels like hours even though it's probably only minutes since one of the boys, Liam I think, is still going strong. Suddenly Harry sits up and my heart leaps into my throat, it tries to crawl out when I see his shirt come up and over his head.
"Here," he says, sitting the shirt in my lap, his fingers brushing my sheet covered thighs.
I don't move at first. Not out of fear of him but fear of me and what I might do. The nympho inside of me is begging to be set free but I fight her back.
"Don't worry," he assures me softly, "I can't see you. In fact, I'll turn on my side and close my eyes."
I smile at his sweetness, if only he knew. Once I have my nympho animal back in her cage I sit up and glance at Harry and see he's on his side like he promised. With a quick swipe over my head the crop top from earlier and my bra are off and to the side and Harry's sleeveless top is on. I'm engulfed in his smell and have to refrain from taking a huge whiff.
As I go to lie back down I have a thought and act on it before I can change my mind. Harry's breathing is steady and deep so I assume he's asleep until I hear it stop as I unzip my shorts. It's like every noise around us silences itself for the zipper heard around the world almost embarrassing me into leaving my shorts on. The only thing that stops me from putting them back on is the fear that everyone will hear the dÄmn zipper again.
My head rests on my pillow again softly so as not to cause any more noisy disruptions for the night. "Thanks," I whisper to Harry, hoping he's asleep.
"You're more than welcome," he whispers back after a few seconds of silence.
I turn my back to him, me under the sheet and him on top of it with his back to me and drift off to sleep.
~*~
Morning comes too soon particularly for me when I realize Harry's in my arms. At some point in the night we'd gotten tangled up in one another and I awoke to me spooning him. I try to unravel myself from him softly. My right arm is easy enough since it's resting on his abdomen, dangerously close to something I shouldn't have my hands on. My left however is the difficult party since his head is lying on my hand.
When I go to move my hand he wakes up and rolls over sleepily to face me. He looks so cute I need to bite my lip not to kiss him. The confusion in his green eyes quickly turns to realization as he takes in my features hovering over him. Smiles slink across our faces but neither of us say anything about our peculiar situation.
As we stumble from our tents Harry and I earn a couple of looks. I don't get it until I look down remembering what we have on. I'm in my underwear and his shirt, nothing else, and he's topless in his jeans from yesterday. We look like we had a good time last night especially if my hair is looking anything like his wild nest.
Heat licks my spine until it reaches my face as I grab my backpack and head to the facilities to get dressed for the day. Apparently we're going on a hike and then maybe back to the water until the festivities tonight. In my humble opinion we could skip the hike but I guess I can't say no to the exercise since I haven't worked out in weeks.
My hair is straight for the most part aside from a few waves at the bottom. I decide to pop on my 'bad hair day' beanie and keep it moving. We're walking on a hiking trail not a runway. Before we head out I load my backpack with bottles of water, since everyone forgot, and sling it over my back.
"Are you sure you want to take a backpack Bailey?" Liam asks, his eyebrow raised.
I roll my eyes, "Yes Mr. Fitness I'm sure, especially since no one else thought to bring water."
He face-palms then holds out his fist for me to pound. "Good looking out."
I laugh at his response, shaking my head as we walk towards the trail. It's pretty pleasant surprisingly up until we almost get to the top of the hill we're climbing.
I walk through a swarm of gnats, my worst nightmare and from there everything that can go wrong, does. I walk into a spider web, it catches on my calves and I feel like I never get it all of the way off. And as if I didn't have enough to worry about on my legs mosquitoes start biting me causing me to smack them every few seconds. By the time we get to the top of the hill I can hardly enjoy the view for being so annoyed not to mention itchy.
I can hear Zayn's laugh before I see him. He kneels down beside me, reaching into his pocket and produces a silver label-free spray bottle.
"Hold your legs out and stay still," he instructs sympathetically.
Once I do what I'm told he sprays me down with whatever's in the canister, the itching stops almost instantly.
"Thank you so much. What the hell is in there? Jesus' healing hands?" I ask, overjoyed that I can finally move freely without bending over and scratching every two seconds.
He laughs again before answering, "Not quite. It's a mixture of calming herbs I bring whenever we go camping. Harry and Liam love their hikes and the bugs love me, seems like they love you too."
"Clearly these bugs have good taste," I sass flipping my hair over my shoulder dramatically.
He shakes his head, laughing as he puts his Jesus in a can away. I give him dap before he leaves to sneak up on Astra and scare her. They really do make a cute couple, I think it helps that she's not in the business and that they're taking things slow. Zayn's all about riding the wave and making those specific feelings in those specific moments last. So as long as she doesn't pressure him too much he shouldn't start to feel overwhelmed and back away.
We all take a few selfies to upload to our Instagram accounts once we're back in signal range and head back down the hill. With just enough time to hit the quarry again everyone goes aside from me and Niall. I could tell Harry wanted to stay but since this morning we've both been on avoidance mode.
I gather the ingredients for sandwiches and the pièce de résistance baked Nutella filled apples. I've never been more excited to being close to starting my monthly, it seems to be the only time I can eat chocolate without my mouth getting dry as weird as it sounds.
"Hey girl," Niall jokes waltzing over with a huge bag of chips for later.
"Hey boy," I jest back, quickly returning my attention to coring the apples.
He sits the chips down the takes a moment before speaking, "I'm going to ask you something and I don't want you to get offended."
I laugh off instinct. How am I supposed to not get offended if what you ask is offensive? I should ask him but instead I nod him on.
"What happened between you and Harry last night? I mean you two went into your tent dressed like yourselves and came out dressed like twins."
I roll my eyes unable to suppress my laughter, "Nothing happened Niall. I was uncomfortable in what I had on so he offered me his shirt end of story."
He nods, eyes slanted in suspicion, "Right, so did you want anything to happen?"
My heart speeds up at that. Should I answer truthfully? Of course Niall is one of my closest friends but what if he judges me or worse what if Harry put him up to asking? That would be so grade school and yet fitting for my hot and cold attitude. I still can't help but be a little annoyed if that's the case especially since Harry and I are so close.
"I mean, we all saw you two holding hands yesterday. Not to mention the way he looks at you and the way you look at him," he trails off before getting back on topic, "We're all kind of just... confused about what's going on with you two I guess."
I decide to answer the only way I can without saying too much. "Me too," I reply with a shrug.
The noise coming from over the hill interrupts his next question which, although he visibly is annoyed with, I'm glad for. He gave me major news that I need a few minutes to process. I knew I felt like Harry looked at me but for other people to see and notice it is... I don't know what it is. I feel like we need to have a serious talk more than ever now but I have no idea how to broach the issue.
As everyone comes out of the facilities fresh and ready to eat I grab myself a beer. Wincing at the bitter taste I swallow the contents down as quickly as possible, holding my nose. If we're going to have this talk I'm going to need some liquid courage.
Dinner went by quickly since everyone was itching to get to their Nutella apples. Moans of satisfaction flood the group as everyone tastes theirs for the first time.
"Oh God my agent would kill me if she knew I was eating this but it'd be worth it, it's so freaking good," Astra groans before taking another bite. Nura nods in agreeance as she does the same.
"It's technically healthy since it's an apple," Daphne jokes, dipping her finger in Nutella for Liam to lick off.
"This is why we never bring girls on these trips," Louis sighs, "None of us can cook for shįt so there's no risk of overeating."
I laugh handing Niall the rest of my apple which he happily accepts. "No risk of overeating now either since we're out of apples and Nutella."
I hear Liam and Zayn groan, in harmony as per usual making me laugh again.
Nura collects everyone's trash as Liam explains the rules to some game we're supposed to start playing. I'm only half listening as I take in the distance between Harry and I. If he could sit any further away he'd be at the bottom of the mountain in his Range. He hasn't looked at me once and it's kind of starting to bug me.
"Alright everybody got it?" Liam asks clapping his hands together and grabbing my attention.
"Wait? What?" I blurt realizing I tuned out a bit too much.
Zayn shakes his head laughing and Liam interjects with a summary, "Basically we're playing hide and seek in the dark. The goal is for us guys to find our girls, or in your case who you came here with, then we'll switch."
"So Niall and Harry both are after me?" I ask, my heart racing in anticipation.
Louis smiles wickedly, the way he does when he wants to pester me, "Interesting little threesome you've got there."
"There's enough of me to go around, I don't mind sharing," I sass back gaining a laugh and fist pound from him.
"Alright let's do this!" Astra yells, running off into the forest beside us first.
The rest of us ladies follow after her quickly trying to disappear in the night. It's creepy as hell being out here. I can barely see my hand in front of my face adding to the suspense of waiting to be found. With two people chasing after me I have to make sure I get a good hiding spot.
"Ready or not here we come!" I hear one of the boys yell. I can't tell who it is from this distance but my heart speeds up anyway.
Rushing to find a place I spot a huge tree that just might offer a decent amount of coverage. My back rests against the tree as I try to slow my breathing down to a whisper. However a screech in the distance scares me so much I almost scream.
The random screams of the girls being caught, in an otherwise quiet dark forest is more eerie than anything. It isn't until a pair of strong arms wrap around my waist and pull me to a familiar chest that I let out a scream of my own.
Harry spins me around in his arms, his outline becoming clearer. "Found you," he announces, his voice barely above a whisper and full of hoarseness.
"How?" I blurt, it's the first thing that came to mind.
Instead of answering verbally he moves one hand from my hip, sliding it lightly across my body, to the front of my shirt giving it two soft tugs. "Shouldn't have worn white."
Even though he can't tell, I roll my eyes, annoyed something so stupid gave me away. "It's cream thank you very much."
He laughs, releasing my hips from his hands, "Let's get back. I think the rest of the girls have been found already."
I walk alongside him quietly trying to decide if I should say something now. If he can't see me I can't be as embarrassed can I? I settle on saying something when I realize the ground has other plans for me. I don't see what I trip on but whatever it is forces me to the ground like a stone in water.
A quick shriek escapes my throat alerting Harry that something's happened. He turns looking for me and then down to the ground, kneeling beside me. "Are you okay? I told Liam this was a stupid idea," he complains, searching my eyes for signs of discomfort.
"I'm fine Harry, I just tripped that's all," I reassure him as he helps me stand.
"If you say so. We don't have to do the next round if you don't want to," he promises, my hand still in his as we start walking again.
I try to distract myself from the fact that I'm yet again holding the hand of the man who could emotionally cripple me for life. "Scared you're going to get found too quickly Houdini? You could always use magic and poof out of here you know?"
He laughs at my corny joke pulling me to him so our arms bump against each other.
Our hands stay tightly clasped until we reach the opening where everyone else is waiting. He drops my hand like it's on fire scalding my pride in the process.
As we trade places and the boys run and hide I'm not as enthused. I know my feelings shouldn't be hurt, we're not together. But I can't help how I feel.
I find Niall quickly, he's getting sleepy from all of that Nutella so he didn't even try to hide properly. He and I split up to find Harry since he seems to be blending in with the night like a chameleon. Checking the tree where he found me I decide next on the bushes in the opposite direction and trip yet again over something only this time that something talked.
"Jesus B," Harry wheezes as I land on him.
With my eyes closed tight from the shock of my fall I almost scream even though I know it's him. Closing your eyes in the dark makes everything ten times scarier. So I lie there for a moment catching my breath and slowing my heart, a difficult task when I'm lying on top of him.
My crash landing doesn't stop me from sitting up straddling him, nor does it stop from gripping my thighs in his hands, his fingertips burning his prints into my skin. We're getting bold in the dark, as if our actions out here aren't going to follow us into the light. There's no 'what happens in the dark stays in the dark' motto in fact it's just the opposite. I know that, he knows that. And yet we only unscramble from our compromising position when we hear someone approaching. Niall finds us both and after an awkward exchange we all walk back to the campsite in nearly total silence.
The game lasts a few more rounds with everyone being 'it' one round and singular people being 'it' for the next few. By the end of it we're pretty tired and decide to head to bed since we're leaving early in the morning.
"If the tents a-rockin don't come a-knockin. Goodnight ladies and lads," Louis grins zipping his and Nura's tent closed. I can hear her fussing at him about it and him laughing as I head into our tent.
I'm not sure what Harry's doing out there but I've decided to finally open my mouth once he gets inside. There are things that need to be said between us and I don't think I could allow him to leave the country without them being brought out.
I grip onto my resolve tightly as he enters the tent, zipping it closed behind him. He lies down beside me quietly for a moment, his fingers drumming a soft beat on his chest. When they stop I decide to speak up.
"Harry?"
He breathes out through his nose, long and hard like he was holding his breath, before answering, "Yeah?"
Now or never Bailey, nut up. "I just wanted you to know I really appreciate you brining me with you I know it must've taken a lot."
He laughs it off softly, "It's just camping B. I didn't want to bunk with Niall again. All he does is fart and block the exit so I have to suffer through the smell."
I can't stop my giggle at that. I can see Niall doing something like that and the disgust in Harry's voice tells me he's smelled some horrible things. Straightening up I reply, "Seriously though, thank you. I know you have some trust issues, I just want you to know I get it. And I want to always be honest with you in the hopes that you're always honest with me."
"Why does this sound like you're about to deliver bad news to me?" he asks warily, sitting up to face me.
I stay lying down knowing if I look at him, even though I can hardly see him, I won't be able to finish. "Because I kind of am but not really. Basically I have a book deal with Pebbles Publishing pending but I think the only reason they want to work with me is because of my relationship with you. They're... pressuring me to write a book with a character influenced by you. It's... this has been eating me up for a while now. I just don't want you to think... I love being around you Harry. I don't want anything to jeopardize that. Does that make sense?"
Although it's not the whole truth it's close. I don't want anything to jeopardize our friendship including any budding feelings I have for him, it's not worth losing him over. And true enough Fresh Start did become a sort of diary about Harry and I and our adventures together but it's turned into a work of nearly all fiction at this point. The moment I realized this was turning into a real friendship I dropped the idea all together, the only reason I kept the book up was my readers. But it was then I made the decision to twist the truth into an unrecognizable entity. The only way you could really find Harry in Fresh Start is if you look for him. I even went back and edited the previous chapters on Spoodle. Henry and Jordan only have the original copy of the story because I was too lazy to copy my amended one from Spoodle. I didn't think they'd be interested in an unfinished work when I have literally a folder full of finished books sitting in their faces. Now in the silence I'm facing I wish I hadn't included it at all let alone taken the meeting. I was just so hungry for my dream to be realized I didn't take the time out to actually think.
"That's all of it?" Harry asks calmly, lying on his back again, "There's nothing else you have to tell me?"
My mind races, trying to think. He sounds like he already knows more than he's willing to tell. "No, I mean obviously I'm sorry, but that's it."
He sighs turning to his side again, this time I follow suit. "It's okay. I know you didn't intentionally try to hurt me and I'm glad you told me. Just tell them to shove it about the book. If they can't see your amazing talent for what it is without a gimmick then that's their loss."
I smile at his sweet words even as they leave a bitter aftertaste. Guilt rests heavy in my stomach, I know I should tell him the whole truth but what's the point? No harm no foul.
"I guess I should be totally honest with you too huh?" he asks staring into my eyes as if he's waiting for permission.
"Please," I breathe, not sure I'm ready for whatever it is he's about to say.
He sighs deeply looking down, "Remember when we were supposed to hang out but you never showed up because you were with Berkley instead? That morning when we talked you called me jealous I denied it but... I lied. I didn't have a right to be but I... I don't know."
I could scream at the amount of bullets I sweated over that statement. We both knew he was jealous, he's a guy and they're territorial at their core. Although the sputtering behind his statement eludes to there being something more behind his jealousy. We're skirting around the issue again, neither of us wanting to grow a pair and just say it.
My eyes lock on to his and it's like our bodies know what to do even if our brains won't allow us to say it. His hand comes up to caress my cheek only to trail down to my chin, his thumb tracing the slight cleft there. I watch his pink tongue dash out to lick his lips and mirror his actions. My eyes close of their own accord as our faces inch close towards one another. I can feel his body heat right in front of me when a loud whisper comes from outside our tent.
"You guys," Niall whispers again, "Are you awake?"
Harry falls back, his head slamming into the pillow making me laugh not only at him but the entire situation. This man makes me crazy. I'm hot then cold, yes, no, then maybe. I don't know which way is up when he's around.
"Yes Niall what is it?" I ask, knowing Harry would leave him outside until he left. I on the other hand am welcoming the distraction.
Quickly Niall unzips our tent and climbs in, the intensity of the moment Harry and I shared floats out of the opening of the tent into the night. "I was lonely over there all alone. Can I stay in here tonight?"
The puppy dog look on his moonlit face makes me giggle. "Fine Niall you can stay but if you let even one rip you're bear food. Got it?"
He nods closing the tent behind him, "Got it."
I look over to Harry who looks less than amused especially when Niall slides in between us, nuzzling his way into the space where our pillows meet.
Harry looks at me one last time before settling into his spot and offering a good night to Niall and I.
I lay straight back and fold my arms over my stomach, hugging myself. Niall is lying beside me with his ass pointed in my direction. I silently pray he doesn't let one rip before closing my eyes to try and get some rest.
I wake up suddenly as hot as all hell. Unsure of the time, how long I've been asleep, or anything aside from the fact that with Niall in the tent the space is remarkably smaller. It makes no sense how so skinny can take up this much room or sleep so wildly. Somehow instead of him being a human barrier between Harry and I we've changed positions in the night so that I'm squished in the middle.
I sit up straight looking from side to side. Niall is on my right curled in some extended form of the fetal position while Harry is to my left with his right arm clinging to his stomach, looking uncomfortable as he sleeps. He's scrunched as if he's trying to take up as little room as possible.
The noises from outside aren't helping me sleep any. Louis and Nura have finally quieted down from their incessant giggling and shushing each other. I can only imagine what was going on in there and truthfully I probably need to scrub my brain.
The only thing aside from a distinct lack of personal space that's keeping me awake now is the sound of all of the bugs outside. It makes my skin crawl to know that they're just patiently waiting outside of the tent to pounce like the rabid beasts they are.
"Here," Harry whispers, his voice so deep it rumbles.
I look away from the unseen horrors outside to see him holding his right arm up, inviting me to lay my head on his chest.
I can't tell if this is a step towards the next level or not. I know I'm more suited for loving someone from a distance. I've never truly experienced love, outside of my family, up close. Even when it was supposed to be with Charlie it was still too far from my grasp to know how to operate in it. I'm not necessarily saying it's love with Harry but if I had to imagine what it felt like or what it looked like, it'd be this and that truth in itself scares me more than anything.
He smiles at me, his dimples on display and it's like staring at the sun. The closer I get to him the more he could burn me and taking this step is like strapping on wings of feathers and unreliable wax.
Hello Icarus, I am you and you are me.
I lie down into his embrace allowing our breathing to sync and his arm to wrap around me securely. I'm definitely going down fast.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
What's up my good people!!!!
I hope yall liked the chapter!! I started on it early so it'd be on time for yall since I was late last update! I had a REALLY fun time writing this chapter. I was downright itching to start on it so I hope yall enjoyed!
This chapter's Question... Is about yall this time :)
What's your favorite color?
This chapter's goal...
I wanted to hopefully show that Bailey and Harry have fallen for each other and everyone can see it but them. That was kind of the gist of the chapter so I hope I didn't make it too obvious.
Also, I decided to give all of the boys new girlfriends since they all want to be single and shiz -_- When I planned this book out they were all happily taken and now SHAMBLES lol So that's where the new girls come from. I used a name randomizer for the names and I didn't really have any ladies in mind for them so you can imagine who you'd like (I tried not to be too descriptive about them physically for that reason).
This chapter's song...
Outlaws by Alessia Cara. I love her song 'Here' (my ACTUAL theme song honestly) so I wanted to use something else from her and this song was perfect. I was tied between this and 'I'm Yours' but Outlwas just seemed to fit the mood of the trip a bit more.
As for new follower S/O's...
This time we have: winnieb46, Carefree2222, Forever_Bae14, Kwithi, whittnicole, and MzzzPorterrr!!!!
Thanks so much for following and I hope I don't disappoint!
Invite your friends to read and follow and leave me some feedback in the comments!! I love hearing from yall!!!!
Until Next Time,
WBN