Chapter 5: chapter 5

AMELIA’S POVMy first thought was not to lose control and leave my kids defenseless. So, I tried to suppress my rising attack and controlled it as I trained myself to do all these years. After my mind was not racing and swirling, I loosened the death grip I had on my kids and made myself look around me to see if Gia was there.It isn’t like I didn’t believe her teacher but if by chance she decided not to go with that stranger, I would have kneed over crying, but no, I looked around and saw all the kids going home with their parents but no sight of my brown-haired beauty. I bit back a sob and raked my mind if indeed someone from my family got Mia. But apart from my uncle who was currently out of state, everyone worked at that time. So, it couldn’t be anyone. I immediately took my phone out of my jacket and tapped it but when I tried it again, it didn’t on. I first thought that in my hastiness I was not doing something right but when I tried it for the fifth time, I knew that my phone died. Shit. I looked back at the teacher and saw her on the verge of tears. I knew there was a clear order in the school to not let the kids go home with other than their parents or assigned guardian. And to know the teacher inadvertently making a mistake which could probably cost her, her whole career and some lawsuits made me pity her but at that moment I was angry at the whole world for making me late and not being right at the time to pick Gia up.I was about to comfort the teacher when my mind flashed back to the stranger from the morning. Gerald. James’s dad. I swiftly searched James’s familiar face in the group of kids standing there but when I didn’t see him there, my mind went back to many ugly thoughts.I wanted my kid back.I just couldn’t ask the teacher if James’s dad collected Gianna. But, what if someone from our family picked up Gia. My mind scrambled to pick up the safe thought and I ran back to the car with both the kids in my arms without even saying a word to that poor teacher. I couldn’t think about anything other than my kid. What she was going through. Fuck. Don’t think about it. Riya started crying as I jostled her in my arms to open the car door. “I am sorry, baby.” I croaked out and rocked her in arms as I deposited a fussy Theo on the passenger seat, before plugging my phone in my car cable. I waited for a few excruciating seconds before switching it on. “Mommy, where Gia?” Theo asked sucking on his thumb and looking up at me with his grey eyes which looked so much like his dad’s, which were glassy. He was going to cry too.“I.. I am not sure, baby.” I was on the verge of breaking down right then and there. Theo looked how much in distress I was and he was prone to react. My sweet empathetic boy. His eyes watered and tears streamed down his face but unlike his baby sister he did not make any sound. I fucking hated myself for stressing him up. “It's okay, my love. We are going to find her, okay? Come here.”I hugged him close and wiped his tears with my cardigan and freed my other breast for him. Riya was already half asleep while drinking and I didn’t even care that we were in a car in an open space. I don’t care if people still shame mothers for feeding their babies. Theo calmed down and latched on to my nipple and with his free hand, he grabbed my loose hair. I rubbed both of their heads and gave myself a breathing exercise to calm down my anxiety. Everything is going to be fine.  I said it like a mantra and grabbed my phone with its cable still inserted. It was charged enough for me to operate. I knew Theo would hold me without my help so with my free hand I unlocked my phone and saw messages from some of my clients and Zach. I had no idea what to do now that I had my phone. I felt fucking lost. I opened Zach's messages first and felt myself gasp. ZACH: Hey, I was relieved from the office a little early so, I will pick Gia up. - 1:20 p.m.ZACH: Where are you? I am home. Sorry, I was a little late. Just got the kids their happy meal from the McDonald’s Gia insisted.  – 2:23 p.m.ZACH: Did you go out with the kids or something? We could have gone out together. – 2.25 p.m.My heart scrambled to accommodate this new news. But I couldn’t calm down my nerves until I see Gia with my own eyes. I dialed Zach’s number and waited until he picked up. I didn’t have to wait long because he picked up on the second ring. “Babe?” He asked when I failed to speak.“Is Gia with you?” That was my only question.“Yes. She is eating her chicken right now. Where are you?”“I will be home in a few,” I said in a clipped voice and hung up.Taking a deep breath, I tried to quash the anger rushing up my veins but through the whole process of strapping up both Theo and Riya in the car seat and the whole drive back home, my anger just grew and grew into resentment and wrath. I wanted to beat something. Possibly Zach. I tried to negotiate with myself about how misplaced my fury was. It wasn’t Zach’s fault that I forgot to charge my phone and didn’t see his text message before. He did even text me early because I usually go out to pick Gia up a little late. So, Zach is not at fault at all. And at some subconscious level, I knew that. But that didn’t make me less irritated towards him.He was acting sketchy for a few weeks and he didn’t even ask me how I was doing once he was home because he would be busy with some work calls. Honestly, this was brewing for some weeks and I let my unnamed emotion grow. When I parked in front of the house beside Zach’s car, I looked at the neighboring house and saw if Darlene was home and I saw her light blue Cadillac idling before her patio. I darted out of the car and ran next door, ringing the calling bell I waited for her to open the door. Darlene was kind of a pseudo sister for me even though she was nothing like my sister. Case in point. She came outside with a face mask applied to her face and her short black preppy hair was sticking out in all directions. She was wearing dark purple loose jeans and a white t-shirt which was loose enough that the black bralette she was wearing inside was visible. She looked like she was straight out of the 90s. “Hey, bitch.”I internally cringed because obviously she is not the best choice for my occasional kids' watch duty but I know for a fact that she was very attentive and non-swearing towards the kids. Because I always watch her face soften when I talk about the kids or leave them with her for a short amount of time. She was kicked out of her parent’s house for getting pregnant at 17 but as she was basically homeless, she had to give up her baby for adoption. I often pity her when I see her wistful gaze on the kids. But even though she was inappropriate at times, she was the best with the kids. “Hey, Darly, just a quick favor.”“Sure.” She said picking at her mask.“Can you watch the kids for a few hours?” I asked and glanced back at my house to see if Zach was already outside but he was not. Probably getting a handful from Gia.“No problem.” She said grinning and followed me to the car. “I will take care of these both go bring the other lizard.” She said when she peered inside the car and cheered Theo on as she got him out of the seat. I went inside and saw Zach crouching down near the kitchen bar stool and cleaning a spilled soda on the floor. Probably the reason he didn’t come out when he heard the car is because Mimi thinks whatever food on the floor is hers and laps up everything. He turned his head towards me when I came in and started getting up from the floor. I ignored him and went towards Gia who was eating her chicken nuggets. I hugged her to my chest and kissed her head trying hard not to cry. Fuck. I have never felt so relieved.“Mommy! See, daddy bought us a happy meal.” Gia said excitedly. I soaked up her happiness and convinced myself that she was alright. After a few seconds with her, I packed up the remaining happy meal boxes and the juices in a bag.“Gia, will you eat your remaining meal and play in Darly’s house with your brother and sister for a bit? You can come back and do your homework afterward.” She nodded her head excitedly and grabbed the carton and darted outside. “Why?” Zach asked with a confused frown when I went to grab the packed back. I simply glared at him and went outside. Darlene was waiting outside with the kids and Riya in her arm. She had a big smile on her face as she told them some story about how she set fire to the oven in her kitchen and that she would show them to the kids. I sighed but it was because of fondness. The kids loved her and I needed the time away from the little ears because it was going to get nasty.“Have fun.” She said with a slight inflection in her voice and looked back over my shoulder and licked her lips suggestively. “Go.” I scolded. All the flirting. She always flirts with my husband even though he was stoic most of the time when he talked to her. I guess she was trying to get under my skin somehow but what she didn’t know was that I trusted Zach not to cheat on me and the thought never even crossed my mind. She once told that jealously would make us good in bed what she doesn’t know was that we always were good in bed.I waved at my kids as they excitedly ran through the quiet neighborhood to reach the next house. After I was sure they were inside, I swirled around and saw Zach leaning against the porch pillar with a towel in his hand and looking at me with narrowed eyes.I thought my anger would have been extinguished by now but I was so very wrong.  All my insecurities, doubts, anger, and fear came rushing back and it found a pretty good match with Zach.I stormed into the house and went straight into the kitchen trying to completely disregard Zach because for all intent and purpose he was not destined to be on the other side of my wrath. But he chose to when he grabbed my hand and all hell went loose. “What is happening, Amy?” He asked his hand tightening against my forearm. I laughed without humor. “You are fucking happening, asshole.”His eyes widened a little. “What?” He whispered. I immediately felt bad to have him using as a verbal punching bag but then I felt angry that I was even feeling bad and succumb to his feelings this fast. You are hurt too, Amelia. I reminded myself and snatched my hand from his. “I don’t understand. What is happening?” He asked as he followed me to the kitchen and dropped the towel near the sink and washed his hands. From behind him, I enjoyed watching how his back muscles rippled as he washed his hand. Fuck. You. Are. Mad. At. Him.He turned towards me as he dried his hands in a paper towel while leaning behind the counter. “Enlighten me, Amy. What is happening? Why are you mad at me?” He said and threw the used paper towel on the counter. “Because you fucking scared me, you fucking asshole!” I yelled and started beating his chest with my fist. He grunted and tried to grab my hands; I gave in to exhaustion but not before beating definite bruises in his torso. “Amelia! Stop!” I breathed hard and did what he said, too dazed to remember that I should not do everything that he commands me to. I looked down at his chest catching my breath, and realized how his light blue button-down looked stretched against his chest with obvious tension in his body. His black tie was almost hanging off his neck and some of his chest hair was springing out from the gap and with at most reluctance, I dragged my eyes from his tempting chest to the storming grey eyes looking at me with confusion and frustration.I wanted to beat him again and my hand tensed in his. I wanted to use him as my punching bag until this unsettling feeling in my nerves settled. “Stop. Breathe for a second and tell me what happened.” Zach said his voice calm like every time like I didn’t just beat him for no reason at all. “I fucking despise you,” I whispered. There was some truth to it. I despised that he was making me feel small with nothing but taking more time to do his work. I despised that after all this time I didn’t feel good in my own skin and had to rely on Zach to tell me that I was beautiful even after three kids and loose skin on my stomach. I despised him that I loved him so much that I couldn’t even be mad at him.His eyes hardened and he looked at me before he lifted me up like I weigh nothing and pushed me against the wall. Hard.  I gasped. My toes barely reached the floor and I was nearly at eye level with him. My whole body tingled and I felt my lips dry just thinking about what he would do to me. I know the look he was giving me. It was a mix of frustration and the want to eat me alive.“Asshole.” I hissed. I don’t know why I was aggravating him but I wanted a reaction from him.Liar, my brain supplied thoughtfully.His eyes turned into slits and in a split second, he attacked my mouth. Finally, I thought and sighed into that rough kiss.- VV 💫🖤Don’t forget to comment and to give your ratings and do follow me! 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