I key in the passcode to Graysonâs penthouse and freeze when the door opens before I finish going through his countless security measures.
Aria leans against the doorway, a worried look in her eyes. âItâs three in the morning,â she says. âHow are you here?â
Grayson appears behind her and places a hand on her shoulder. âCome in, buddy,â he says, no questions asked. I follow him in and pause in the hallway. The last time I was here, I was with Amara. I push away every thought of her, barely able to bear the pain.
Aria tips her head toward the living room, and I follow her, my steps heavy, reluctant. I have to tell her, but I know that the second I do that, everything between Amara and me is truly over.
Grayson holds up a whiskey glass, and I take it gratefully, emptying it in one go. It doesnât even remotely numb the pain, but thatâs only because I havenât had enough yet. Iâd give anything to drown out the memories tonight. Not just of Amara, but of my parents. Of Aria refusing to speak for years, the countless times I had to sit beside her as night terrors haunted her. How do I tell my sister that I fell for the daughter of our parentsâ murderer? How do I explain that I brought her into their home? Where do I even begin to ask for forgiveness?
Grayson sits down next to Aria, his face expressionless, and I shake my head. He used to always be by my side, but tonight Iâm grateful Aria has him. Sheâll need him to endure what Iâm about to tell her.
âAria,â I say, my voice wavering. âAmara is Peter Simmonsâ daughter.â
She looks at me, and I canât quite describe her expression. She looks resigned, wary. Aria nods, her movements slow. âI know, Noah.â
I stare at her, not quite comprehending her words. âYou⦠know?â
She nods. âI knew who she was the second I first heard her name. Amara⦠it isnât a very common name.â
I look at my sister wide-eyed, my mind whirling. âYou knew, and you welcomed her with open arms?â
Aria nods, her expression guarded. âShe is not her father.â
I rise to my feet, my anger overflowing. âWhat the fuck, Aria? What the fuck do you mean sheâs not her father? I fucking know that, but sheâs still that manâs daughter. How could you welcome her into your home? How could you not have told me? How could you let meâ¦â
Aria crosses her arms, her eyes flashing with anger. âLet you what? Fall in love? Be happy for once?â
âHappy?â I repeat. âHow could you watch me fall in love with her without a single warning? How could you, when you knew she and I were on borrowed time?â
Aria stands up, her expression one Iâve never seen on her before. She looks angry, but thereâs also understanding and compassion in her eyes. She lacks the sadness Iâve come to expect to find in her eyes.
âI could, and I did, because she is not him. Amara doesnât deserve to be punished for crimes she didnât commit. Can you honestly look me in the eye and tell me she isnât the best thing that ever happened to you? That she didnât make you happy in a way you didnât think you could ever be?â
I fall silent, unable to refute her words. âAria⦠her family⦠God, I canât even begin to describe what theyâve done. They covered up Mom and Dadâs murder. There isnât a trace of news available anywhere. It happened a few years ago. All of a sudden, there were no articles about the burglary anymore. They tried to cover it up.â
Aria shakes her head. âNo, Noah. They didnât. I did.â
Grayson nods and places his hand on Ariaâs shoulder in silent support. He knew. My best friend knew as much as my sister did, and neither of them told me.
âWhy? Why the fuck would you do that?â
Aria sighs and looks away. âI didnât want that to be the last piece of news about them. Mom and Dad have done so much, theyâve contributed to so many charities, and they were so well-loved. I wanted the good they did to be what people would find when they look up our parents. I was tired of the past haunting us, of everyone knowing what weâd gone through. When you and I changed our last names, I also removed every trace of that horrible day. I wanted a fresh start, and I wanted to preserve the memories of Mom and Dad that mattered most. The articles still exist, they just arenât indexed by search engines.â
I still remember how ruthless the kids were at the first few schools Aria and I attended. A simple search for our names told people much more than we were willing to disclose, and I remember how hard it was, how painful it was to constantly be reminded of the way we lost our parents. It felt like it was impossible to escape the sorrow, the pitying looks. I canât blame Aria for what she did, but I canât help but feel betrayed.
âWhy didnât you tell me? I donât understand.â
She shakes her head. âNoah, weâd finally gotten onto our feet. I just didnât want to explain why I felt the need to do what I did. I didnât want to bring it up.â
I swallow hard, my mind instantly replaying me trying to get Aria to talk. She had it much harder than I did.
âAri, still⦠the Astors, they approached me knowing who I was.â
She nods. âThey did, but they didnât do it to harm you, Noah. Do you remember the partial scholarship you received when you thought youâd have to drop out of school? I traced that back to Harold Astor. As you and I grew older, I started keeping tabs on Peter Simmons and his family. It took me years to realize it, because Harold was clever, and he only ever gifted us amounts that didnât raise suspicion, but eventually I saw the pattern. That man⦠heâs been looking out for us for years. I admit, he was likely motivated by guilt, but he didnât have to do any of it at all.â
âLook out for us,â I repeat, incredulous. âYouâre kidding me, right? The man fired me and made it impossible for me to find another job. His family tore ours apart, and now heâs ruining my career, Aria.â
She nods and looks away. âHeâs desperate, thatâs for sure. I was surprised when he offered you a job, because heâs always kept his distance. I guess he truly saw potential in you, and watching from the sidelines was no longer enough. The man has monitored us and our performance for years. I guess he wanted to help but never expected you to fall for Amara. I wonât pretend to know what heâs thinking, but I suspect he was trying to break you two apart before either of you realized how the past connects you.â
I glance at Gray, diverting my anger to him. âAre you hearing this? How the fuck is she so calm? Did you know all of this?â
He nods. âI knew, and I support Ariaâs decisions. She did what she had to do to protect your happiness, and I think sheâs right. I donât think Harold Astor is harmful, despite him firing you. Heâs desperate, just like Aria says, but heâs not a bad man. Ari has been keeping tabs on that family for years. If there was something to worry about, sheâd have intervened.â
I stare at the two of them in disbelief. âHow the fuck is all of this okay with you? They ruined our family and then fucking invaded our privacy, acting like weâre fucking charity cases.â
Aria crosses her arms and sighs. âWe were, Noah. Half the time we could barely afford to put food on the table.â
âBecause of them!â I yell, wishing I could get through to her.
Aria just shakes her head. âNo. Because of Peter Simmons. Stop blaming an entire family for the actions of just one man.â She inhales deeply and looks away. âNoah, you know as well as I do that the weapon that killed our parents was Dadâs. Iâve gone through the case hundreds of times. He didnât expect Mom and Dad to be home. There was a struggle, and Dad mustâve pulled his gun. Peter Simmons didnât even steal anything expensive. All he took was food and some of my clothes. He was trying to provide for his family.â
She runs a hand through her hair and shakes her head. âIâm not trying to make any excuses, Noah⦠but you have to acknowledge that he paid for his crimes. He served his sentence.â
âAre you fucking with me right now?â I ask her, in disbelief. âHe murdered our parents, Aria. I donât give a fuck how it happened or why. Mom and Dad arenât with us today because of him.â
âI get that youâre angry, Noah. I get it. But that same anger will hurt you more than it will anyone else. Let it consume you if you want, but I wonât stand here and support your self-destruction.â
She walks past me, slamming her bedroom door closed, her calm demeanor slipping for just a second. Gray winces at the sounds and looks at me through narrowed eyes, like Iâm the one at fault here.
âSheâs fucking crazy,â I tell him.
He pours me another glass and nods. âYeah, she is. But she isnât wrong. Aria kept tabs on him from the second he was released and it took her months to make peace with the situation. She might act like sheâs fine now, but it took her months to get where she is now. Itâll take you some time, too. I do think Aria is right, though. Amara is not her father.â
âWhat the fuck am I supposed to do, man? I canât love Amara. I canât be with her. Not her.â
Gray nods and lifts his glass to his lips. âWould your mother have loved her? Forget about Amaraâs father for just a second and tell me⦠would she have loved Amara?â
I empty my glass and reach for the bottle. âIf only it were that simple, Gray. Mom will never even get to know Amara, because of her father. I wonât ever be able to look at her again without being reminded of who she is, of what her father took from us.â
Gray nods. âSo youâll rob yourself of a happy future, the way her father robbed your parents of theirs?â
I stare at him, wishing I had an answer for him.