"Nidhi ko mandap par baitha de,"
[Make nidhi sit down in the mandap.]
My mother's eyes were filled with tears. I also had disappointment in my eyes. I had wished for a husband but he was not what I wished for.
"Ji"
[Yes/ okay/ha]
"Var vadhu ka gathbandhan kar dijiye"
[Basically asking for gathbandhan. ]
Pandit ji started his mantras. I was disappointed. But his eyes had more than disappointment, like a mocking tease. As if saying ' you wished for this, and you got it'.
"Vadhu ka kanyadan karne ke liye Mata pita aa jayein"
[ to do the kanyadan of the bride, parents pleased come. ]
Rituals were progressing fast .
The pheras were taken me pushing his wheelchair.
"Vadhu ke maang me sindoor aur gale me mangalsutra Dale thakur sahab"
[Fill vermilion in the hair line and tie the mangalsutra in the bride's neck.]
Again the same creepy and mocking smile.
" vivaah sampan hua, aap ab ek vyavahik dampatti hue, apka grihstha Jeevan sukhmay ho!"
[ the marriage is complete , now you are a married couple, may your married life be happy and prosperous. ]
I was married to the disabled thakur, who is paralysed below his waist and bound to a wheelchair. My all the sexual fantasies were dunked in the forgotten chest of ruin for 'forever'.