Chapter 28: chapter 28

GOWRII am strolling the playground of the school aimlessly. My mind is busy thinking thoughts about, well, you know who. I don't understand why he keeps occupying my mind.Wait, why is this smell familiar. Even before I hear his voice or see him, his perfume smell reaches my nose. It gags me a little. “Hey Gowri,” calls Jay.“Hey,” I tell.“So, you have not yet answered my question,” he tells.I sigh.I am sorry Jay, I am already married. I wanted to tell but yes, of course, I will not because my brain still wants to prove to Shiva that I can keep a promise.“Jay-” I start but my phone ringtone interrupts us.I look at the display. Savitri aunty. I excuse myself and move a few steps away from Jay.“Hello Gowri,” Savitri aunty speaks in a cheerful and delighted tone.“Hello ma,” I greet her. “How are you and Nithya?”“We good,” she replies. “How are you and Shiva?”“Fine!” “Gowri, I don’t have time to elaborate. We have planned your wedding reception for the second Saturday of this month i.e. you still have two weeks for it. You and Shiva have no objections right?”“No, I don’t have any,” I reply.“Alright, dear. Then I will call you soon. I have a lot to prepare. Just inform Shiva about it,” she tells and hangs up. I stare at my home screen as she hangs off. I want to laugh at the irony of the situation.Shiva doesn’t want anyone to know about his marriage with me but his mother wants to tell it to the whole world. Shaking my head, I turn around to find Jay staring at his phone. He looks up when he hears my footsteps.“Gowri, tell me quickly before anyone else interrupts us,” he tells smiling. “Jay, my answer is still a no and will always be a no,” I tell.“Why?” he asks taking a step towards me. I take a step backwards. He is surprised by my action but doesn't comment on anything.“I don’t have any feelings like that. You are a good friend,” I tell. “Then I still have hope to make you fall in love with me,” he tells and walks away. You don’t have. I want to shout those words but I am staring at the sky because I am having another bigger problem than Jay. It is Shiva. How will I face him?🍀🍀🍀🍀I am waiting before my best friend’s apartment for the past half an hour but she is nowhere to be seen. I try calling her but all my calls go unanswered. Maybe I should go home and face the consequences of my act. But I am scared out of my wits. I know that Shiva regarded the fishbowl lovingly as the last memoir of his first love and I simply broke it. Worse of all, I called out on him and accused him of being clingy and all. Seriously, I don’t know what possessed me when I said those things but I was angry at him for hurting after someone who left him for good. Added to that was my monthly mood swing.I am about to leave my friend’s place figuring that she is on a date with her boyfriend when a two-wheeler stops before her apartment. Sara gets down from it. Dinesh is the driver. She bids him bye but he pulls her hand and asks her to kiss him. She rolls her eyes at him and tells him that they are on the road. Despite myself, I couldn’t contain my smile. Sara is a great fan of romance. Dinesh shrugs and removes his helmet pulling her a little closer. I turn away not wanting to witness my friend’s whatever it is. But the apartment’s watchman isn’t impressed by it.“Keep those things in your bedroom,” I hear him say and laughter bubbles out of me.I hear a groan and I turn to look at my friend who is red in face walking towards the apartment blushing furiously. I call her name. She looks around and surprise flickers through her face when she sees me.“Only now the bride has got time to visit her friend?” she teases.“Sorry, I have a lot to tell you and I am caught up in a problem,” I tell.🍀🍀🍀🍀“So, you are inviting me to your reception?” she asks.“Yes and no. I am not sure whether we will have a reception. It all depends on Shiva.”“Gowri, what is the problem?” she asks. I hesitate whether to tell her the truth. I am angry with Shiva. I don’t want to obey him yet I don’t dare to break my promise. Even to my best friend I have to lie or rather tell only the half-truth.“Well, we both had a huge quarrel last Saturday and I was very angry with him. In my anger, I threw the first thing that I got hold of. Due to my bad fortune, the first thing that I got hold of was Shiva’s most valuable thing,” I tell trying to be vague as much as I can.“Don’t tell me you broke it,” tells Sara with an expression of terror.I only give her a wistful smile. “Unfortunately yes, it fell and broke into thousand pieces.”“That is terrible. How did Shiva react? Was he angry with you?”“He was. But my anger got in the way and I shouted at him though I was the one who broke it. I just couldn’t stop myself. I feel bad about it now. I am not sure how to  face him.”“You didn’t face him in the  bedroom ?” Sara asks obliviously. We sleep in separate rooms, I think but when I hear Sara gasp, I realize that I told it out aloud.“What? Why do you both sleep in separate rooms?” she asks narrowing her eyes at me.I panic and think of a hundred explanations to tell and finally settle on the partial truth, “According to our horoscopes we aren’t supposed to sleep together for some time.”“Bullshit,” she tells. “Do you believe that?”I shrug, “You know, my mother does.” I was never grateful for my mother’s craze for astrology. “So, you have been hiding from him for the past two days?”I nod, my mind returning to Shiva. I am scared to death to face him. I feel like running away somewhere away from all this. Sara gently places a hand on my shoulder.“Gowri is there more to the problem than you are letting out?” she asks in a soft voice. “You seem so worked out about him. I have never seen you like this. You always face every problem but why are suddenly so afraid to face your husband?”Knowing me for these many years, my friend had sensed that I am in a terrible mess and I very badly wanted to tell her what is happening between me and Shiva but I just couldn’t.“No,” I lie.“I think the best thing is to let Shiva know that you didn’t intentionally break it. You should face him. It may be hard but only if you do the hard things in the relationship, you can get ahead in it.”I give her a nod. She is right. I have to face him.  I hug my best friend grateful that she doesn't press for more information.“So, now tell me what is happening in your life?” I ask her pulling away from the hug.“The usual things only; job, parents and Dinesh.”“I think the last one is the most interesting thing in your life from the scene I witnessed at the entrance,” I tell smiling. She flushes red.“You saw what happened?”“No, I am decent. I turned away the moment he pulled you close to him.” “Nothing happened as you imagine. It was about to but the watchman spoiled it, ” she tells in a disappointed tone.I only smile at her. She rolls her eyes at me and tells, “Gowri, you will know when that happens with Shiva.”That will never happen. 🍀🍀🍀🍀