~Malia~
"So, how do you think our sessions have helped you thus far, Malia?"
I affixed my blue eyes on my therapist's glasses in front of me and took a deep relaxing breath.
"I think they've helped me tremendously. I've obviously endured a lot of trauma in my life, but I know now that keeping it all bottled inside won't help anything."
Her warm brown eyes crinkled through her smile and she told me that I had reached the end of our sessions, and while I wasn't overly relieved, I was happy to gain my Thursday afternoons back.
I could say that she had helped me, truthfully. I finally understood what it meant to finally be at peace.
She had helped me come to terms with Daniel's death and watching him die right in front of my eyes.
It was one of the hardest things I'd ever had to endure, but I knew that the person who I turned out to be was all due to the sacrifice that Daniel had made for me and for Louis.
I had worked through my abandonment issues, which in turn helped my amazing relationship with Louis.
Everyone kept saying that our wedding was going to be one for the history books, but in all honesty I wasn't even the least bit nervous.
At the age of twenty-five and having finally finished my degree in Psychology, I was ready to marry the love of my life, and it didn't matter to me if the whole world was watching.
The only thing that mattered was him there holding me at the altar as we declared our love in front of the entire congregation.
It was so magical when his grandparents had finally given their blessing, given the fact that I was an American, but my ties to the throne went back farther than almost any other member of the royal family, so my bloodline could not have been ignored.
The wedding was two days away and after my therapy session I went back to the cottage that would be my home for however long we deemed it so.
The quaint beauty of it never ceased to leave me breathless.
"Oh look, it's the bride to be!"
"Mar? Grandma, Lizzie? What are you all doing here?"
"We figured it was time to finally try on your dress for the final fitting!"
I knew they'd try to find a way to see my dress before the wedding. They were very sneaky bridal party members, that was for sure.
"Ugh, fine! But no pictures!"
"Mum's the word!"
I laughed at Lizzie's facial expressions and followed them to the bathroom to try on my gown for the last time before the big day.
Standing there in my long flowing white gown and fending off tears and hugs from my family and only girl best friend I'd ever had, I knew I'd finally found true happiness and peace.
***
~Louis~
I was sweating my entire face off, and although the main reason for that had to be the cause of the itchy and annoyingly tight black tuxedo and overcoat, the part of me that didn't want to admit that I was nervous had to be the root cause of my profuse perspiration.
I couldn't wait to see her in her dress, but standing at the altar was hardly the place to start breaking out into sweating bullets that run down the side of your face as one might get the wrong impression of the reason for said sweating.
I had conjured up a million different ideas and pictures in my head of what she would look like walking down the aisle, but as countless cousins and bridesmaids made their way down the long entry way that let to where I was standing with the minister, I found myself craning my neck to see if I could get a peek at her through the massive oak double doors situated at the back of the cathedral.
Stained glass windows descended from the ceiling as over a thousand guests peppered the pews in front of me. I had always pictured my wedding day as a momentous occasion, but the amount of people that actually ended up turning out floored me immensely.
The traditional wedding dance music began and everyone in attendance stood to watch Malia ascend to the altar and my breath was forced out of my lungs as she did so.
Accompanied by her grandfather, she was dressed in a floor length white gown that accentuated all of her curves but kept the majority of her body to the imagination, and luckily I didn't have to strain too hard to remember just what it looked like... we had been living together for the better part of five years, much to the royal family's chagrin, but the younger generation took to our modern relationship with stride and the only gossip rag that gave us any trouble anymore was 'The Sun' but who really cared what those fake journalists cared anyway?
We were stupidly happy, and I couldn't wait to marry the woman of my dreams.
Her face lit up with the brightest smile I'd ever seen on her when she saw me and I was sure that it matched my own.
She finally reached me after what felt like hours and we joined hands, the spark still there the moment that we touched.
We craned our heads to listen to the minister's words while still trying to keep our eyes trained on each other the entire time which was a bit difficult, and I tried to ignore the many HD cameras floating around the room to catch every angle.
When it came time for the 'I do's' part of the wedding, I prepared myself to begin to speak as we had written our own vows.
"I, Louis Arthur Windsor, Duke of Edinburgh, take you Malia Ellen Spencer, to be my wife in every way possible. I promise to always keep you close in the darkest of times, and to never allow you to push me away, no matter how hard you try, even to your annoyance. I will be your protector, but also your partner, and your equal in marriage. I will love you unconditionally and without ego, I will prioritize your needs and happiness over my own. I promise to always support you in whatever you choose to do, and I promise to be the man that you have always deserved."
My hands shaking and heart pounding in my chest, she began with her vows next.
"I, Malia Ellen Spencer, take you Louis Arthur Windsor, to be my husband. I take you as my lover, my supporter, and my partner in everything we do together. We will see each other through our highest highs and our lowest lows, and we won't shy away from the ugly parts of ourselves, because when you love someone, you love them for all the reasons you fell for them, and for all of the reasons that make you want to scream. So I promise to be the wife you want and need, even if I gave you advice you don't want to hear sometimes. I promise to be the woman that you have always deserved."
Her words took my breath away for the millionth time in just a few short minutes, and then we were exchanging rings, a golden band placed on my ring finger, the cold metal solidifying the bond that had been there since the moment I'd laid eyes upon her.
Our kiss was earth shattering and the applause was thunderous.
"We're married..."
I gave her a wink and the blush that rose to her cheeks never got old.
"Yes, Princess. We're married."
She gasped in realization of something.
"What?"
"I just realized...your nickname finally came true."
I wrapped my arms around her as we finally were able to walk down the aisle back through the cathedral as all of the onlookers wished us good luck and fortune.
"Not technically...we still have to wait for your coronation for that one, but I always knew I'd make you my Princess one day."
We ducked out of the way of the photographers for a small moment of silence and got lost in each other's embrace, not bothering to care if I messed up her carefully crafted makeup.
I couldn't wipe the stupid smile off of my face.
"What?"
"Nothing...I just knew the moment I met you that I was so screwed."
"Oh really? And why's that?"
"Because, my dear Lady Spencer-I was at your mercy the moment you stumbled into my seat that very first day."
"Really? I thought you hated me at first."
"Not in the slightest. I was just trying to ignore what my heart was screaming at me. There is not a bone in my body that could hate you."
We kissed once more and finally had to break apart and appeared in the balcony to wave to the thousands upon thousands of onlookers who had come to celebrate the wedding.
Malia was a natural, though I could tell she was a bit flustered with all of the attention.
I pulled her even closer to me and gave her a kiss on the cheek which made the crowd go wild. She gained her confidence and the smile exuding from her made me realize she might have been more fit for royal life than even I was.
I knew in that moment that we would be utterly happy for a very long time, and whatever conflicts arose and obstacles were thrown in our way, we would overcome them because she was my light, and we would rise above it all, so long as we had each other.
The End
*******
Author's Note:
Thank you to all who have gone on this journey with me, I couldn't have done any of this without your support in me as an author!
I can't thank you all again for reading and supporting me!
It has been a pleasure writing 'Royally Flushed' with you all!
I have something up my sleeve however, as I'm giving you all a sneak peak into my brand new book coming Feb. 2020!
Please allow me to introduce my new book, 'Afterglow'!
Synopsis:
An Enemies to Lovers Romance:
When Kate is forced to move back home to the boarding school she despised only to be confronted by the school's infamous bad boy and childhood crush, she is quickly reminded of the reasons she wanted to leave so desperately in the first place- her boyfriend stealing sister being one of those reasons.
Faced with being the center of attention by said teasing bad boy and self proclaimed arch nemesis, Lachlan Brooks, Kate finds herself put in multiple precarious positions with Lachlan and faces questions about their quick changing relationship.
Tortured with past family secrets and the question of her parentage and the danger that accompanies that knowledge, Kate is more elusive than ever, and this blooming romance between her and a boy who used to make her life a living hell isn't helping with her confusion.
Can she push past the reservations she holds against Lachlan and truly let him into her heart, or will they be forever stained by the afterglow of the traumatic past and damage that no one ever thought to repair?
Exclusive first chapter:
frigid
Soggy, half-melted snowflakes drifted down the window of the town car in a lazy, lingering path that matched the pace at which I wished to return to the one place that I'd ever called home.
One long year and still those ice capped skyscrapers that stood like gallant knights in the distance brought with them the promise of heartache and still born memories threatening to break through the spiked walls that I had erected high in my mind the moment I escaped.
I blocked out the screeching horns and squealing brakes from the constant traffic around the small black town car that was chauferring me back to my own personal hell and donned a pair of headphones that blasted my only reprieve back into my ears- music. A blessed distraction and salvation all in one, I survived on a diet of scintillating guitar riffs, haunting vocal runs and chilling lyrics that filled the space in my mind where all of my familial problems should have resided.
After my beloved sister took from me the only boy I ever loved, I gouged myself on a litany of slow and painful ballads that could evoke tears from a hardened criminal. When my parents split and I decided to go and live with my father in California, thousands of miles away from the only home I'd ever known, I had tormented my eardrums with raging punk rock that had me drumming my fingers to the beat long after the songs had ceased playing.
And when my father had caught me in a bit of a precarious and compromising situation with a certain boy in California, the angst ridden and hatred fueled songs that skidded by on my playlist one after another got me through the stuffy plane atmosphere, but it was the damned hour long traffic jam car ride that had me massaging my ear lobes and wishing that my mind could blot out the reverberating sounds that kept penetrating my safe little bubble of down beats and low bass notes that usually did their job.
But not today. No, today was the exception, the day that I would stroll back through those large marbled doors into the foyer and smell the Chanel perfume wafting off of my mother's fake chest in droves as if she were trying to hide the facade of happiness with it, somehow trying to make everything seem perfect and beautiful when our lives were anything but.
It was easier to face my father after I'd stumbled across their well kept family secret, as he was always too busy doting on my new stepmother Ellen and her growing belly to notice anything suspicious about me and my behavior, but my mother was far more observant. Before I chose to live with my father she would breathe down my neck at any chance she got.
We were a split apart family, with one daughter so burned she decided to live across the country rather than face the toxicity, and the other so jaded she just so happened to steal the other's first real boyfriend. I sighed as I realized the problems I was bringing home with me far outshone and eclipsed the ones I had left home with.
The song switched over and a sigh of relief fell from my parted lips, my mind imagining the cloud of fog that I would have produced had the window been opened to allow the chilly new winter air inside.
January was the beginning of the second semester, and junior year was about to come to a quick ending, but of course I couldn't have finished it out in California. No, I was too much of a troublesome bother, what with my father about to be inviting a new life into the world with his new barely adult wife. If I wasn't so wrapped up in the other events that had happened in California, the ones my parents had no idea I'd found out about, then getting kicked out might have just hurt my feelings...
The driver slammed on the brakes and my head hit the back of the plush seat causing one of the earbuds to fall out and dangle helplessly against my chest.
I was stuck between two worlds- one a fantasy that I could escape to and wallow in, while the other was harsh, painful and all too real, but one that I would nevertheless have to enter sooner rather than later.
"Come on, it's a green light asshole!"
Back to my fantasy world, it was.
I scrolled aimlessly through the pictures I had taken with my friends in California and remembered our tearful goodbyes. I had a honey sweet boyfriend back there, Ian, but long distance was far too heavy for a pair of seventeen year olds, especially with the load of baggage we each carried into the relationship even before we added a few thousand miles between us.
The breakup was sweet and amicable, if a bit inconsequential and surface level, as was most of the relationship itself. It was more of an intense friendship if anything.
The town car lurched forward slowly as the lull of slow traffic kept the rubber tires turning, the fumes from the obscenely loud garbage truck ahead permeating the carefully curated air inside while the roar of its engine obstructed my next song in my head.
I leaned my head against the cool glass, my dark brown locks squishing against the iced window and locked my vision on the pair of light brown almond shaped eyes that stared back at me through the half transparent reflection of the window. My sister had once commented that she wished she had the same kind of eyes until she'd overheard my ex boyfriend tell her he preferred blue eyes, and then she was permanently on the side of cerulean. I rolled my eyes at the memory.
It wasn't long before the soft roar of the engine and light rocking of the stop and go traffic lulled me into a restless sleep and before I knew it I opened my eyes and the skyscrapers of New York City were long gone, instead replaced by towering pines dusted with plush white snow and imposing mountains in the distance, their beauty offset by the haunting garish building that the town car was dangerously creeping closer and closer to.
My home.
It hadn't changed in the year and some odd months that I'd vacated the premises, still gray brick and marble columns filled with the soul sucking money that my family had acquired through the generations. My mother hadn't worked a day in her life, but my father took over the business the second he turned twenty-one, something he never forgot to remind me and my sister of constantly and incessantly.
Accounting wasn't the most exciting job in the world, but when it came to owning the country's largest firm in the financial realm, my father took home the cake in making it sound even more boring than one could have ever imagined.
My mother kept the house and her bank account padded with the divorce settlement a larger sum than a monarch would have needed to run a small country, so pulling up to the small mansion that only housed two people normally seemed excessive. It was excessive when it was a full family of four in attendance, but the gross waste of space and resources of my childhood home finally hit me stepping out onto the slick, glossy pavement iced over with a thin sheen of frozen rain.
A permanent frown fell upon my face as I took in the dark evergreen pines edging the property, the landscaping impeccable despite the season being the dead of winter when everything was supposed to be, well, dead.
The needles of the pines dusted in fresh powder sparkled in the falling sunlight and I had to shield my eyes just as the double doors of the pseudo mansion opened and down came my mother and sister, her boyfriend of one and a half years in tow for the welcoming party. Oh, joy.
I hadn't laid eyes on Holden Masterson in one long year, but it wasn't long enough for me to forget the way his golden brown hair shone in the sunlight or how his muscular figure crafted by his years on the lacrosse team did certain things to my mind that should have been illegal. His casual designer outfit was hidden by a large black overcoat and his eyes were covered with a pair of glasses that only added to his appeal.
An entire year, though, and somehow that massive betrayal hadn't disappeared, no matter how many miles had separated us.
I averted my attention from the nauseatingly happy couple and flitted my gaze to my mother's natural blonde hair flipping to the side in agitation as she realized that I wasn't making a move to greet them at the steps and that she would actually have to step on the driveway.
Even ten feet away and I could smell my mother's disapproval of my outfit and hairstyle from where I stood. I'd dressed casually with my legging clad legs plopped into a pair of black fur ankle boots, the large black pea coat the same one she'd bought for me for Christmas the year before. It had been shipped, as we couldn't do in person holidays. We got a FaceTime call, and that was it, that was Christmas from my mom.
My driver hauled one of my bags upon his shoulder and began walking towards the house which cued me in on the fact that I hadn't moved since spotting my family. Great.
One reluctant step after the other took me away from the blessed sanctuary of the enclosed car that was my only escape, my feet stomping reminding me of a death march. Perhaps I could have made a break for it and stolen the car and drove it all the way back to the airport, but I was only seventeen and all of my bank cards would be frozen in a second if I ever tried to run away.
Plus, I didn't have anywhere to run to. My dad didn't want me, so back to mommy dearest it was, even if I didn't want either of them anymore. It didn't matter what I wanted.
"Katrina Lane Randolph, you get over here and give your mother a hug!"
Her voice came out high pitched and somewhat happy, so I obliged, intentionally keeping my eyes away from Holden and Sloane, my 'sister'. I really could put air quotes around her name, because we weren't really blood related considering I was adopted.
Apparently, my parents didn't think they could have a baby after they were first married so they went through the adoption process with me but the moment the papers were signed and I was officially a Randolph, Sloane was conceived. I was the dark haired, dark eyed, dark skinned adoptive daughter of the famous finance moguls and Sloane was the perfect blonde haired blue eyed daughter they had originally wanted in the first place.
It wasn't like I was treated like Cinderella, quite the opposite really. In trying to make up for the fact that I wasn't blood, my parents treated me to almost everything I could have ever wanted growing up, leading to hordes of jealousy problems with Sloane. They didn't realize the monster they were creating whilst doing it so I couldn't blame them much, but it was like once they split up, all bets were off.
It was like we had to choose sides, and I chose dad's. I chose wrong, apparently. I should have chosen neither and moved in with my best friend Vera instead.
My mother's hug was stiff and cold, and I was wrong about the Chanel perfume. This time it was Dior. Her golden locks loaded down with copious amounts of hair spray tickled my face and I was desperate to escape her embrace.
Holden somehow caught my eye as I pulled out of the hug and damn if those blue eyes didn't still try to make me feel something other than anger, but I steeled my resolve and planned to get his image out of my head, no matter what.
I'd hunker down and study all semester, focus on reading and music. Anything to keep myself from remembering that I was still desperately searching answers to why he did what he did, despite the fact that he was wrapped up in my little sister's arms.
Speaking of my mother's carbon copy, even right down to the exact same type of hairspray to hold their blonde manes down in the frigid winds.
"Sloane."
She blessed me with an oh so warm side hug, only briefly letting go of Holden in order to do so. She hadn't changed one bit. We were a cold family, hardly any emotions shown between us, so it wasn't unusual to go such long periods without seeing one another.
I gazed out at the cold grey air and huffed out a puff of breath that satisfactorily curled in a plume of fog and drifted up towards the equally bleak sky, evaporating into nothing and escaping the current reality I was trapped inside of.
I was truly grateful for the world that I was born into, and I had loved my family once upon a time, but it was suffocating having to be surrounded by a sister who hated my guts, an ex that I wasn't over because of the way our relationship had so abruptly ended (via a drunken text that he had cheated on me with said sister), and a mother who was less emotionally available than a Pop Tart.
Don't forget the secret...the weight of an enormous secret that suffocated me just by giving it space in my brain to exist.
"Can we go now, I need to talk about Lacrosse practice with Taylor and Evan and I want to hang out before Lachlan's party tonight."
My body visibly tensed at the sound of Holden's voice, but mainly because of the names that he'd uttered.
I hadn't seen or spoken with my fellow classmates aside from my best friend Vera for the entire year that I was gone, and I almost put the last name that had dropped from Holden's lips out of my mind the entire time I was away, but there was a gnawing nuisance that allowed that name to keep popping up in my memories.
Lachlan Brooks, the only other guy that I'd given a second thought to in my entire time at Bayfield Academy, mainly because his family owned the entire damn campus, but also because of his annoying desire to point out the fact that I was adopted to anyone who had ears, and his incessant teasing about my boy troubles was the cherry on top of the bitter cake that summed up my feelings about the boy. The teasing didn't start until after Holden cheated one me, so at least I couldn't say he'd bullied me all my life, but six months before I left for California was more than enough ignorance to last a lifetime.
"Oh, a party! Can Katrina tag along?"
I ground my teeth together. My mother knew I preferred being called Kate over Katrina, but she always ignored that.
"I'm good mom, I actually want to unpack what I'm keeping here for the weekends and get ready to move in to school since I'm sleeping there Sunday night."
I wanted to add because I wouldn't want to be caught dead at Lachlan Brooks' party seeing as how I hated his guts but I couldn't say that. My mother worshipped the Brooks' and if she knew how far my resentment ran for that entire family then she probably would have had me disowned.
"Are you sure? I'm having a friend over, I wouldn't want to disturb you."
Meaning she was going to have a man over. Great.
"I'll lock myself in my room, it'll be fine," I commented, my voice bored and monotone, my mood quickly turning sour as my blood boiled. She had no idea that anything was even remotely wrong, or maybe she did and she chose to ignore it, typical of our family.
She didn't know that I'd actually be inviting Vera over and we'd be spending the night in the pool house, specifically the hot tub on the screened in porch, I'd already texted her and told her the plan. A bottle of vodka and a swim was exactly what I needed to start the shittiest semester of my life off right.
My mother seemed like she was about to push the issue, but seeing the uncomfortable looks on Sloane and Holden's faces, I decided it was best for everyone if I ended this little reunion.
"Well it was lovely to see everyone again but I'm exhausted from the plane ride, and being kicked out for being an 'out of control teenager' sure can wipe a person out. Excuse me," I said, a smirk across my face aimed at my mother.
My mother wasn't so used to my bluntness, and she sure as hell didn't know the real reason behind it, but before she could allow my words to shock her in front of a guest she schooled her mostly plastic face and straightened her fur coat, eyes half panicked to watch Holden's reaction.
Sloane rolled her eyes while Holden seemed surprised at my outburst. I used to be so good at being the quiet, reserved and obedient little girl that did everything asked of her because I was supposed to be so grateful that a wonderful family like the Randolph's had taken me in but I was more than done with acting like I was a part of this family, especially after I'd stumbled across the truth in California.
That sweet little obedient Katrina was no more, and I was happy to show my mother the new and improved Kate that refused to put up with anymore family secrets, there were far too many skeletons in the closet already.
My mother forced a laugh out of her over lined lips and made a comment about how funny I had become in California. There she goes again, sweeping things under the rug and pretending they didn't exist, just like she did with everything.
It was like emotions didn't exist in my family, and whilst it was something I had grown accustomed to, it still bothered me because I knew it wasn't how other families operated. I'd witnessed Vera's family act completely different than mine on so many occasions that it made me painfully aware of just how truly screwed up mine was.
I shot Holden one last secret glare and found that he was already staring at me but quickly covered it up with a cough and stretched his arm around Sloane's shoulders, causing my own to sag in defeat and pure exhaustion.
And so they walked away after saying goodbye and I was left with my mother and town car driver.
Was it too late to rethink the car stealing option?
Well, there it is! Â I hope you enjoyed this small sneak peak and make sure to follow me to get notifications of when this book goes live in February of 2021!
Thank you all so much,
Kristen :)