A/N: Inspired by the song above! Have another angst chapter because I can hahahaaha~ Enjoy!
TW: toxic relationship, abuse, quite angsty.
Key: (N/N) = nickname
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"Tell us what is your plan, Primus damn you!" Arcee roared, slamming her blades onto your faceplate. Fresh Energon dripped and you spat out some from your dermas but you still didn't give in. Smirking, you hazily looked up at the two-wheeler with a cool look.
"Nice try...even a cybercat could deal more damage than you." I said, grinning. Arcee groaned loudly, ready to land another hit to my aching body when Bulkhead pulled her away, trying to calm her down.
"Hey, easy there! We need her alive!" he said, though I could feel the Wrecker eyeing me.
"It's a good day to die~" I said, leaning in. My two servos were held up in the air by stasis cuffs, rendering me powerless against these afts.
"Careful for what you wish for, Con." Wheeljack replied, optics glinting with murder.
After all, who wouldn't?
You were the top lieutenant of the Decepticon. During Megatron's absence, you were next in command besides Starscream. Though, you power and strength far outmatched the wretched seeker. (Y/N) (L/N) was once a mediocre flyer with a job at the Iacon Hall of Records, spending her days computing data and other mundane stuff.
Until you joined the Decepticons.
They gave you freedom to use your fight abilities to the max, not to mention your natural ability of fighting. You could go hand-in-hand combat with Megatron and get a stalemate, that was how good you were and he saw that.
...I mean, he would obviously take notice sooner or later, given that you were very temperamental and often go to the Pits to battle. That was how your fellow data archivists tossed you out of the place, having a distaste for their crew with a liking to battle.
Oh well, their loss.
Obviously, you weren't EXACTLY a mindless criminal. You had some lines to be drawn, and that was hurting innocent beings. You had wandered through the streets of Cybertron, seeking shelter after you were stripped and casted out of your caste, leaving you with nothing but yourself. You knew how hard it was to fend for one's own and saw how the unfortunate perished in the harsh conditions and vowed to only kill your targets.
Nothing more, nothing less.
Case in point, you would always steer clear from the Bot's charges, or humans; the main organics dwelling this planet. You knew they were with the Autobots, but you ALSO knew that they were small and... innocent.
At least, in your judgement.
You got yourself into a few troubles due to this opinion of yours with Megatron, but you held your ground firm. And thus, leaded you to this point. You were scouting for Energon after having an awful row with your supposedly sparkmate, the silver gladiator had all but spat harsh words and raised his servos on you...again, when the Autobots ambushed you and took you back as a hostage.
Great.
Flashback
"I won't hurt the kids! Why won't you get that through your thick skull, Megatron?" I yelled, waving my servos in the air. The warlord growled, slamming his servos on the computer before stalking towards me. With a flash, he tugged onto my audial fins hard, pulling me close to his face as hurting words started to pour out of his dermas.
"YOU ARE MINE TO COMMAND! IF YOU DO NOT WISH TO DO AS I SAY, THEN YOU'RE OF NO USE TO ME!" He seethed, backhanding me to the wall. I didn't fight back, keeping my tears back as I stood back up, only to be kicked back down again.
"I question your true powers and motives, (Y/N). Are you with me or not?!" he asked, stepping hard onto my back.
"I-I am...but I can't-" my words were held back into my glossa as I heard the familiar sound of his sword unsheathing.
"Last chance; yes or no?" he demanded, tipping his sword at my neck.
"N-NO!" I yelled, flipping over with my last strength and pushed him away. Backing up to the wall, I activated my swords, holding them out.
"THEN YOU ARE A TRAITOR TO MY CAUSE!"
"I AM NOT!"
"THEN DO AS I SAY!"
"AM I NOT YOUR EQUAL, MEGATRON!? WHY CAN'T YOU LOVE ME AS YOUR SPARKMATE!?" I fought back, tears dripping from my face. The silver mech that I've once loved gave me a sneer, optics glowing bright red. Finally, he dropped the truth.
"Never once have I ever thought of you in such manner. You are nothing more but my lieutenant."
Choking back a sob, I dashed forward, slamming him down. The momentum brought him to the ground and I flipped over, running past him and made my way off the ship. Soundwave tried to stop me by firing at me, which ended up burning the tip of my left shoulderplates but I couldn't stop now.
With a jump, I was off the ship and out on my own, just like how Starscream once was.
I found a cave and stopped by, transforming back into my biped form. Realising I've yet to refuel, I sighed and trekked the place, hoping to find some shards. Luckily, I still had an Energon scanner in my subspace to help aid my search.
In quest for finding my life fuel, I've yet to take notice of five figures behind me. By the time I realised something was amiss, it was too late. I was already on the ground, unconscious.
---
"Optics on us, slagging glitch!" Smokescreen said, pounding his fist together and snapped me back to reality. I sighed, letting my body dangle mid-air. I was undeniably famished and tired, so this façade of mine was starting to wear off.
"Oh? Finally letting your guards down? I guess that means you're ready to talk." The rookie continued to probe at me.
"You're so noisy, can you please shut up?" I snapped.
"Get fragged."
"Funny, I was going to say that to you first." I replied. Ultra Magnus came in, cerulean optics firm and stoic as he held up an Energon prod at my face.
"I will give you three chances, Decepticon. Answer our questions and we will deal with you in a lighter manner." He said, holding onto the long device.
"And in those three chances you'll be giving to me, the answer will always be the same; no sir." I sighed, bracing for the impact. To be fair, I did address him in his given title.
So, could you like, be gentler in those weapons? It hurts like scrap.
"Very well then." He said, activating the Energon prod. I shut my optics tight, gritting my dentas as I waited for the harsh stinging sensations to override my circuits and completely frying them off.
In the process of doing so, please make sure it kills me, damn you.
"STOP!" a familiar sound brought me out of my dark thoughts and I looked up wearily to see a tall figure standing by the doorway, optics wide.
"By the Allspark! What have you done!?" Optimus gasped, speed-walking to the interrogation room with an angry aura. Ultra Magnus stood straight, saluting his leader.
"Sir, we are interrogating the Con while you were busy." The commander answered truthfully. Arcee looked down, rubbing her arms in shame. Smokescreen tilted his helm to a side, unable to meet Optimus's gaze. Bulkhead and Wheeljack stood by the corners, dermas shut tight.
"...Leave us." Optimus said with an edge in his voice. The commanding tone of his was enough to make all the Bots to evacuate the area, leaving you alone with the ex-archivist.
"Long time no see, Pax. I see you're getting healthier."
"(Y/N) ..." he breathed out, kneeling down to get a closer look on your injured face. The Prime had a visible scowl and clicked his glossa in frustration.
"Don't be angry, Pax. I'm on the enemy side, remember?" I joked, hoping to ease the tension. Sadly, the beatings finally caught up to me and I coughed out even more Energon, much to Optimus's displeasure.
"You're losing Energon, (Y/N). I cannot allow you to die, not like this."
"Why not? It'll make it easier for your team; one less Con to deal with." I said, inching close and did my very best to lean on the bot's face.
"Oh (N/N), what happened...?" he murmured, gently cupping my cheeks. I hissed at his touch as pain shot up at the gash given by Arcee herself.
"Heh, haven't heard that name in a while." I smirked. Optimus steeled his gaze on me, demanding an answer.
"He hurt you again, didn't he?"
"Actually, that was from Arcee. Megs don't go for the face." I slipped, accidentally agreeing to his words. I winced, backing away. "H-How did you know about Megs...?" I added.
"Oh Primus, I was right all along..." Optimus gasped again; blue optics widen with hurt. "Arcee...did this?" he gulped in disbelief.
"Yeah, that's gonna leave a mark. Gotta thank Arcee later on for the wonderful gift." I laughed it off, playing an innocent look but the Prime didn't buy it.
"What happened? Why did you choose to stray from us...from me, old friend?" he muttered softly. I let out a bitter laugh, tearing away the mask I've been holding from the very beginning as I cried out.
"Olf friend?! Was I ever a friend to you, Orion!?" I snapped, writhing at my cuffs.
"You always were."
"Lies! You weren't there when I needed you!" I hissed, showing my fangs.
"I'm sorry..." he dipped his helm in shame.
"You and the rest of the archivist were all of the high and mighty class! Me? Oh no, I was just a lower-class clerk wanting to fit in but NO! Your people THREW ME AWAY just because I had a passion for battling! I could've used those credits I've earned in The Hall of Records to join the army if it wasn't for YOU SCRAPS!" I roared, pulling hard on my restrains. Optimus was silent, helm still pointed to the ground.
"Answer me, Orion!? Was I ever a friend to you!?" I yelled, sobbing loudly.
"...No." he said. My optics widened at his reply, spark aching with disappointment yet again.
"I knew-"
"-You were more than a friend to me." and he crashed his lips against mine. I stayed still, not knowing how to react. Alas, I gave in and melted into the kiss, letting my emotions to take over.
Pulling away, Optimus deactivated the cuffs and pulled me close to his chassis.
"I've always loved you (N/N) ... I'm sorry for not standing up with you when I had the chance...when I saw how Megatron made the first move, I backed away...until I saw how he treated you."
"W-What-"
"Don't deny it (Y/N), I saw during our countless battles how you would involuntarily shudder when I swung my blade over you helm, or how you would cower and ducked when I raised my servos. You may fool the team with your quick acting, but you can never deceive me." he said, looking down at my weakened frame.
"Hah, and here I thought that my acting skills were getting better." I snorted sarcastically. Optimus held me close to his chassis, placing a soft kiss on my forehelm as he spoke.
"I've never wanted it to turn out this way, I swear."
"I know, it's not your fault Pax. All I ever wanted was someone to love me..." I sighed again, patting his face.
"I've always admired you from afar, little one..." he trailed off, optics dimming with retrospective. I chuckled, placing a soft kiss on his helm.
"Even when I'm a mess?" I asked, raising an optic ridge at him.
"Indeed." He sighed.
Leaning in close, I decided that maybe it's time to change for the better, and it seems like Optimus thought of the same as he held that familiar smile he reserved only for me and spoke up.
"Would you...join me, (N/N)? I don't want to lose you again." His voice cracked as he hugged me tight. Gingerly, I took his black servos and cupped them to my face, sighing into his broad chest.
"Perhaps I would...Orion."