i was drowning once
instead of picturing a body of water just see a little girl, sat on a chair. it's a hospital room, but we aren't in one of the rooms of someone being visited. no, this one's gone.
i'm choking, maybe not literally but physically yes, that lump in throat feeling completely taken over.
who decided kids should be there? none of the funerals i'd attended were quite like this.
i sit, frozen. hands cupped in lap. i just stare and cry, nothing more to do. where would you place when everyone's holding each other?
A kind lady comforts me, a nurse.
"you may not feel or see it right now but you are loved, they care"
i'd never thought of it that way. i see now, how sad that scene must've been. a child silently crying, separate from everyone else.
i think my understanding of what she meant is where the shift started. that sad, sad scene never changed, she was wrong.