"Oh my god! Why are you drinking?"
"Seriously? Wow, that's new information"
"I never thought I would see a day where you worked as a partâtimer"
"You know that handling your father's business meetings does not count right?"
I hear their voices behind me but it gets fainter and fainter as I move away.
Their voices are cut off as I leave the house. The cool air and the night sky greets me once I am out and I am not sure where I'll go or where my feet are taking me. All I know is I am walking and I cannot stop.
I focus on breathing and try my best to not go in there and smack someone.
I have no right to.
Whatever they said, it was their opinion and it wasn't like what they said was wrong. It wasn't my fault or my parent's fault that I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth.
My parents were both hardworking and they tried their best, in their own way, to provide for both me and my brother.
But why was I feeling like shit?
Probably because no matter what I did and who I tried convincing, I would always be an outsider in their group. I was not a Royal and even though I was in the school I was a charity case at best for them.
It was my delusion that I thought I was fitting in with them. Even if it wasn't in the forefront of my mind, there was a sense in my mind that these people, at least some of them were becoming my friends
They were people I could count on at the time of adversity but I guess I was wrong.
"Yuri, wait!" I feel a hand on me and I turn to see Soobin panting.
"What are you doing here?" I ask, confused.
"I followed you out. I am sorry for what they were saying. It was not her place to make such comments" he frowns.
"It's okay. It's not like they were wrong. They don't know what it is like to work multiple part-time jobs so their comments do not affect me" I lie.
I hope I sound as confident as I want to feel.
"I took a sip after you left" he confesses, which confuses me more.
"What do you mean? Why? If this is your way of trying to make me feel better it's not working" I say honestly.
I came out of that house because I wanted to be alone for a while so that I could wrap my head around all my feelings and I was not a complete wreck when I went back in.
If I went back in.
"I told them, I worked in your shop. I even got paid for it. So technically it was a part-time job"
"I appreciate you sticking up for me, in your own manner but it doesn't help, honestly, I feel like a fool" I confess.
"I am sorry. What they said was wrong. You don't deserve that kind of treatment," Soobin says, his voice earnest.
I glance at him, then look up at the sky. The moon is full, casting a silvery glow over everything. The stars are scattered like diamonds across a velvet backdrop, twinkling softly.
I take a deep breath, the cool night air filling my lungs and calming my racing heart.
"Let's go for a walk," Soobin suggests gently.
I look at him apprehensively.
"Maybe we can find somewhere quieter." he suggest and it works because what I want most right now is to stop the bujzing in my head.
We start walking, our footsteps echoing softly on the pavement.
We don't talk to each other and I am thankful for that. I wasn't in the mood for a conversation.
The distant sound of waves crashing against the shore becomes clearer as we approach the beach. The moonlight reflects off the water, creating a shimmering path that seems to stretch into infinity.
"I never wanted to be part of their world," I say quietly, breaking the silence.
We are both facing the sea, not looking at each other and maybe that is why I can speak my mind.
"But I thought... I thought maybe I could find a place there, somehow. You know, maybe I could find friends" I realize how naive I sound just as the words leave my lips.
"It's not your fault," Soobin says firmly.
He turns me to face him but I look away. I don't think I would be able to continue speaking if I looked at him. I wasn't sure if I could continue given how small I feel right now.
We reach the beach and I find a spot to sit down, still not facing Soobin. He follows suit and takes a seat beside me.
The sand is cool and soft under our feet. I stare out at the ocean, the rhythmic sound of the waves soothing my frayed nerves.
The emotions bottled up inside me threaten to burst out of me in the form of tears but I hold them. I wasn't a little child anymore. Crying would not solve anything.
I spare a glance at Soobin and he is looking ahead, his side profile visible to me. His pale skin glows under the moonlight and the ruffles in his hair because of the wind makes him look endearing.
He looks calm. He looks serene.
I want to feel that calm.
"You know, when I was younger, I used to think the sea was endless," Soobin says, a small smile playing on his lips. I quickly look away when he catches me looking at him.
"I'd sit on the beach for hours, imagining all the places the waves had been and all the things they'd seen."
"I used to do the same," I admit, smiling slightly. I remember the trips we would take as a family. How we would sit together and build sandcastles and I would dream of such big things.
"It made me feel like there was more out there, beyond what I could see." I sigh.
"My grandmother would away say 'look at the waves. They have travelled so far and yet do you see them tire? Be like the waves, be tenacious in your life and work on your goal. One day, just like these waves, you'll reach yours" I echo her words out and the memory makes me rueful.
"There is more out there. And you're going to find it and you're going to achieve your goal. You're stronger than you think, Yuri." Soobin says softly.
I turn to look at him, his face illuminated by the moonlight. There's a sincerity in his eyes that makes my chest ache.
Saying these words out loud makes me emotional but somehow makes the tightness in my chest loosen up a bit. Enough that I don't feel like I am being strangled with my own words.
"Thank you, Soobin. For following me, for being here." I appreciate him being here even when I didn't want him initially.
"Always," he replies.
"You're not alone, Yuri. You never were." he reaches out and holds my hand in his.
We sit in silence for a while, just listening to the waves and the whisper of the wind. The night sky seems to stretch endlessly above us, a reminder that the world is vast and full of possibilities.
"Do you want to go back?" Soobin asks after a while.
"No, I think I am going to head to my room. We have an early morning trail tomorrow so it is best I get some sleep" I smile and try to get up when I hear a voice from behind.
"Yuri, I have been searching all over for you" I turn to see Yeonjun walking towards me, his voice hoarse and his face a tell tale sign of pink.
There is someone following him but I don't know who she is.
Both of them stop in their track and I follow their gaze to see them zeroed in on my hand, which is currently held by Soobin.
I quickly yank my hand away from him even though we weren't doing anything wrong. But I don't think Soobin even notices me now.
He has a shell shocked depression on his face as he follows me and stands up. He is paler than usual and there are more emotions in his eyes than the waves in the ocean.
I follow his line of sight to the woman standing near Yeonjun. She is someone different. She looks a little older and much much more elegant than I could ever strive for.
Even with the strong wind, her dyed honey hair is in perfect shape, not a strand out of place and her shorts and shirt are wrinkle free. Her makeup is just enough to highlight how naturally beautiful she really is.
But is is the way she carries herself that oozes elegance.
I look back and forth between them, my mind momentarily diverted from Yeonjun.
"Nuna?" he voices it out as a question. As if he can't believe that she is really standing there in front of him.
"Hi Soobin, it has been a long time. How have you been?" she smiles and I see something break inside Soobin.
A/N: Hello lovely people. I bet you thought I forgot about this book but I did not. I did write 2 chapters and was in the process of writing the third when I just felt like the story was going in circles and I did not know how to finish it. That lead to a dark spiral and I ended up scrapping my drafts and really think where I want the characters to be. It also didn't help that I was trying to multitask and write draft of another story. That really divided my attention but now I am back and I plan of updating the net chapter soon. I will not put a timeline but I have set a goal of completing Royals by the end of this year and we have so much more to cover in the character's that I need to amp up my updates.
Anywho, not going to dump my brain dump here. I missed you guys, tell me what's been going on in your lives. What did I miss? Ans also, what do you think of this chapter? Your comments really motivates me to keep writing.