I woke up in my study undisturbed. It was late in the morning now, I definitely overslept. For the first time ever, Ronan didn't come to drag me back in his bedroom for the night. I guess he was pleased enough of me yesterday... Stupid mutt.
Slowly, I stood up, afraid that the monster bursting out of the door any second. But the door stayed closed, calming down my nerves. I looked down, frowning - I was still wearing the same sweater and pants from yesterday. I needed to shower and change.
So I opened the door, trying not to make a sound, and headed for his bedroom. He shouldn't be there at this hour, right?
I was lucky - the room was empty, undisturbed. Quickly, I grabbed some fresh clothes from the wardrobe and headed to the shower to freshen up. When I was done, I rushed down the stairs to the kitchen to help the girls.
Mira was the first one I saw. She was in the middle of sweeping the floor. As soon as she noticed me, she stopped in her tracks, nodding to me, turning her neck towards me a little. Even though I won a fight against her, I wasn't expecting this respect. It was strange to see a girl who tormented me all this time is now baring her neck in submission. But I only nodded back at her, saying hello to the other women. Hanna was nowhere to be seen.
We spent all morning and afternoon preparing the meat - apparently, the males went for a hunt this morning to restock the food resources. When we were done, it was already dusk outside - I hated how quickly the darkness came during winter. I hated winter in general.
It was getting a little cold in the house, so I went outside to grab some wood for the fire, stacking them up in my arms.
''Good evening'' silky voice wrapped around me, close to my ear. ''Fuck, god damn it'' I cursed as logs fell from my hands due to me jumping in fright. I turned around, only to be met with a pair of orange-red eyes, flicking in mischief. Great, I'll have to deal with Ethan now...
He smiled at me, flashing teeth. A feline smile. ''Here, let me help you'' he purred, with slight mockery in his voice, bending to pick the wood.
The darkness seemed to press around him, cling to his skin. Even though it was freezing outside, he only wore a leather jacket on top of his sweater and slim fitting jeans. When we started walking back to the pack house, I inspected him closer. Everything about him radiated almost palpable ease and grace. He intimidated me even more than Ronan did.
Finally, we reached the pack house and went to the fireplace in the big living room. Ethan fed the flames with the wood he brought and cozy orange light started warming my freezing skin. The room was deserted. Strange. Usually this place is full of people at this time of the evening.
''Where is everyone?'' I asked, hating the silence. Ethan slumped in the armchair, stretching his long legs. ''They are celebrating their successful hunt, I think I saw the bunch of idiots going to one of the other houses.'' So I will have a nice quiet evening only for myself as Ronan will definitely be with them. ''Great, thanks for helping with the logs.'' I turned around, intending to spend the rest of the night reading or even practicing the piano, but Ethan was faster. He jumped in front of me, blocking my exit.
''Have a drink with me.''
*****
I was laying on a couch now, one hand holding a glass of bourbon, another draped under my head. Ethan was sitting on the floor, his back leaned to the couch I was laying on. I was already tipsy from a strong drink, but the conversation we were having kept me drinking.
''So, have you killed that kid?'' I slur, sipping some more. Ethan flicks his eyes on me, then close them and lean his head back. ''No... I never did. Ronan has always despised me, so I guess he will always blame for everything bad that's happening in his lands.''
''So...'' I start slowly, ''What happened to that kid?'' Ethan only shrugs his shoulders, not even bothering to answer. Prick.
After a long silence, only ice clattering in our glasses, I ask again, my curiosity finally overtaking me. ''Why do you want this place?'' Ethan turns his head, locking those red orbs on me, giving me his famous feline smile. He sips his drink again before answering.
''My pack is getting bigger, Eira. We need more space. And such a shit pile that Ronan is doesn't deserve to be the owner of such a nice place you have here.'' I snort at his ridiculous reasoning. ''And you do? You basically came here demanding what's not yours, promising to basically slaughter us all!'' Ethan chuckles, taking yet another long sip of his drink. How come he's not completely wasted by now?
''Love, that's how the things work here. We need land - we come and get it. I am kind enough to even consider a compromise.''
I mumble something incoherent under my nose, reaching for a bottle to refill my drink. But Ethan grabs the bottle first and fills my glass for me. I nod my head expressing my gratitude. At this point, I would most likely spill the liquid all over myself.
''And how that's going? The compromise, I mean.'' Ethan sighs. So not very good.
''Ronan is unwilling. But I'll get what I want.''
Another silent minute goes by. But I feel comfortable, not intimidated by this man at all. Even though he will most likely kill us all, I feel serene. I could sit here for hours, drinking my bourbon, talking with this strange man sitting right beside my comfy couch. I have never felt like this with Ronan around. Oh, the irony...
''Why did you offer me all this?'' I wave my glass in front of him, breaking the silence again. Ethan looks straight in my eyes, no smile adorning his face this time. Someone's serious. ''Because you needed a minute to relax, otherwise you looked like you would have drowned.''
What the hell he is talking about? I'm completely fine! ''No, you're wrong. I'm good.'' I slur, not managing to form some more complex sentences anymore.
Ethan still stares at me, his face is harsh and stiff. ''Yes, Eira. You look so miserable yet you surprise me with each passing day. You fought off two of them in, like, two minutes. Ronan broke you, but yet you still stand. You managed to escape and hide for two years. I admire you for that.'' Then, his eyes flicker with mischief again. ''You're shit at archery, though.''
''I told you I was out of practice, you piece of shit!'' I scream, slapping a pillow to his head, making my drink spill. I stop, locking my eyes on the glass with regret. ''Great, look. I spilled my bourbon because of you.''
''Darling, say a word and I will give you a whole bottle.''
*****
Finally, after hours of talking, I slumped on Ronan's bed. I considered going to my little study and sleep on the couch, but damn, I was drunk and needed as much comfort as I could get. So Ronan's bed it is.
Somewhere around dawn, I was awoken by a door slamming shut. Ronan. By the way he walked, he was way drunker than I. He collapsed on the bed beside me, soft snoring filling the room soon after. I was still intoxicated, so I lost my consciousness again.
Only around 1 pm., I managed to get up, Ronan still sleeping soundly on my side, and went to the shower to freshen up. When I emerged, the monster was up, quickly closing the distance between us and wrapping me in his arms. He smelled foully and I could still feel the lingering stench of the alcohol on him.
I wiggled, trying to escape his grip, but he only held tighter. ''I missed you yesterday at the party, dove'' he mumbled, pushing his nose to my hair sniffing me while his hand groped my thighs. Bile rose to my throat. I wanted to go to the shower again. ''Ronan, let go, you're hurting me.'' I hissed through gritted teeth. My body was on fire again, but it was not that kind of flames like the day after, when I wanted more of his touch, no. This was that kind of fire that brought my panic attacks up to the surface, that made me sick to my stomach, that made me crouch in fear.
But Ronan, of course, did not let go. So I pushed him with all my might, finally escaping his grip. The monster's eyes went dark, rage consuming his face. He grabbed my arm again and slammed my body to the wall, pushing himself against me. How can one have such sudden mood changes?
''What the fuck is wrong with you, Eira?? I'm your mate, you should beg for my touch!'' He pushed me harder. ''What, does my touch feel bad against your skin? Why the fuck you won't let your alpha touch his property??''
His words made me see red. My palms turned to fists from the way he referred to me. He wants the truth? Fine. I'll give it to him.
With storms and blizzards rising in me, I shoved him hard, making him to stagger back from me. Quietly, with my voice low and controlled, I begin.
''Do you have any idea, my alpha, what is like to hold a dead body for twelve hours? Do you have any idea how it feels to hold your father like that? To witness his death? To feel his blood covering you, staining your arms, body, your face? Have you ever tasted your father's blood, my alpha?''
Ronan looked confused from my sudden speech. This time, it was I that took a step closer to him. With daggers in my eyes, my gaze never leaving his, I continued.
''Do you know, my alpha, what happens to a body in an early spring, when it is still freezing outside, after twelve hours? It gets cold. Stiff. After twelve hours, it feels like you are clinging to a rock. But you still don't let go.''
I took another step towards him, pouring my pain and misery and anguish on him.
''And why, you ask me, I hate your touch? You are not special, alpha. Your touch is no different than anyone else's. You know who found me that night? My brother. He pried me away from my father's cold chest that night, tried to take me in his warm embrace. But do you know what you feel after those twelve hours with your fathers cold corpse?''
Ronan only stared at me with those big icy eyes, not being able to muster a word. So I kept telling him my darkest story.
''You feel like its been not hours, but years. I laid there with him, stone cold to my touch, for years. And when my brother reached for me, lifting me up, he was too warm, too hot, too alive. My skin started burning under his scalding touch. I swear I felt blisters rising on my palms.
In those hours, those damn years, all I could concentrate on was his marble skin, my alpha. His cold, stone skin. And when someone alive touched me again, it felt so wrong to be dragged in the living world again, because I, in those years, started to think I was dead too.''
I closed the gap between us. This time, Ronan's hands didn't wrap around my body like they usually do. Now, I only had to finish my story.
''So the answer to your question is no, my alpha. Your touch is nothing special. But every time your scorching palm touches my skin, I relive those twelve hours, those years again and again. And it reminds me that I am still alive, breathing, and my father is not.''
A/N
I really hope you liked this chapter, because I loved writing it! Ethan is so fun to write about and I really enjoy exploring his personality a bit more! Also, what do you think about Eira's story?
As always, please let me know what you think in the comments as I love interacting with you guys, and if you liked this one, consider giving it a vote!
I love you all,
J.
xoxoxoxoxoxo