"How long do we have to stand here?" Jade asked in a resting position with her hands behind her back. She felt like a soldier. She had been guarding the door next to Evie for three hours now, as if there was something in this outdoor parking lot to watch over. Her hair had turned into a tangled mess and she hadn't brushed it once since they arrived.
"A while." Evie said.
"So, Evie... You did hear Alex say that this is a creepy, abandoned place to bring a girlfriend, right?" Jade asked.
"Yes."
"So he thinks I am his girlfriend, right?"
"No."
"Well, I'd say yes," Jade said mockingly, "And if that's not proof enough, he had the trust to talk to me in the suite without any clothes on."
"He was surely wearing his boxers," Evie said. Jade grumbled. "I knew it. Alex does that all the time. Half naked in the Solar or the suite? It's an everyday occurrence."
"You think so?" Jade rebutted, "Well I bet you've never seen him naked."
"I have actually," Evie nodded.
"Really? Well he got horny with me and offered me a 'taste' you know?"
"He was sweating?"
"Yes."
"It was his pheromones," Evie replied.
"Really? Well, I bet he's never offered that to you."
"Oh, shut up," Evie grunted.
"Who of them have you seen naked?" Jade asked.
"My life, my business."
"Oh! So you've seen them without clothes! Who else? Frank? He's your ex so obviously. Who else? Other than Frank and Alex?"
"None. Of. Your. Business. And in that case, why do you care?"
"Because I don't want them to be showing too much to other girls," Jade said as if it were obvious.
"Are you going to be like that with every girl who approaches the guys, Jade? Because let me tell you, a large part of their fandom are women."
"Well, your blonde friend seems very interested in Zeth and Paul. I'm just saying that you better tell her that the boys already have a girlfriend," Jade pointed at Kasey guarding the tour bus, sitting on the door steps. Paul was done filming two hours ago, and Kasey had sworn to protect him. It wasn't like there was someone to take care of here in the middle of nowhere anyway. "I like the blonde, but I won't stop protecting what's mine."
"They're not your property, Jade," Evie was already getting angry.
"You know? Frank loves you. So..." Jade stopped mid-sentence when she saw Evie's expression change from anger to fury. "Listen. Frank will never be a good boyfriend for me, you know? He won't stop talking about you and besides, I think he's too traditional for a poly relationship. How about you stay with him and I stay with Zeth... I mean, with the other guys and then we're all happy, huh? What do you say?"
"Return to your position two steps away. We must guard the door."
"Good! I didn't want to talk anyway! Jesus, you are literally being so rude."
Why was Evie putting that abyss between Frank and herself if it was obvious that she loved him?
They were in love, weren't they?
Was she ashamed of his affection towards her?
Did Evie not know that she already loved Frank?
Wasn't this what being in love meant? That feeling of longing you get every time you look into someone else's eyes?
Maybe they just needed some space?
Some time apart to figure things out?
"The boys have already finished and are discussing artistic visions with William." The sound of a familiar voice said from above. Jade turned up to look at BC-13. He had his grapple gun in his hand and was slowly descending from the roof like Spider-Man. He finally placed his feet on the ground outside the double doors.
"When will I get my own grapple gun?" Jade asked.
"I have some in my training room," Evie replied coldly, "But it takes a while to use them without crashing into walls or hitting your shins. And you won't need it. You'll just be the guardian of the Solar, if you're here it's because you asked for it. Don't get used to playing bodyguard."
"You're right, I need to get used to being the girlfriend, not the employee," Jade said, spitting those words out like venom.
"Anyway. I think creative negotiations will end soon." BC-13 said, leaning against the double doors as he retracted the metal cord of his weapon with a graceful wrist move. "We'll be home in no time," and then he snapped his fingers.
"Hey boy, did you just snap your fingers?" Evie asked, and for a second, she looked paranoid. "We must be alert."
"Did Everett tell you anything about me?" Jade bit her lip.
"Not really," BC-13 said, "But he asked Zeth about a bottle of wine he left in the refrigerator of the tour bus and he carried a table and chairs to the... Woah!" The door burst open and BC-13 fell on his back.
"I knew something was going to happen. Something always happens when you snap your fingers," Evie told BC-13.
"Jade! It's good to see you! Time for Just Date!" Everett said, running out of the diner towards the tour bus. Kasey stood up and let him in, looking at Evie and Jade with a confused expression.
"Is that usual?!" Kasey shouted.
"Everything about Everett is unusual!" Evie shouted back. "Jade, what did the Big Guy mean by Just Date?"
"They didn't have civic culture in Nepal or what?!" BC-13 shouted as he stood up, "You should not flung open doors just like that! It's not safe!"
"The Big Guy was desperate to get out," Alex said, emerging from inside the diner, arms crossed, "I thought we'd have to lock him in the closet like when my mother did to me and Gamaliel during Christmas dinner when I was seventeen."
"Did your parents really do that?" Jade raised an eyebrow and Alex laughed.
"Oh yeah! They did! They put tape on my mouth and tied my hands and feet! Gamaliel is much quieter than me so he was just told to shut up. My dad actually left through the back door and didn't come back for a month."
"Are you talking about Gamaliel the Elder? Or Gamaliel the Younger?" Evie asked.
"Gamaliel The Younger," Alex clarified.
"There are two Gamaliels in your family?!" Jade asked.
"Gamaliel The Elder is the son of Lycardo and Betatriz," Evie said, "Gamaliel The Younger is the son of Alfanso and Betatriz."
"Mum wasn't very good with names," Alex said, biting his lip, "I'm surprised you understand my family tree, Evie."
"I'm surprised you understand your own family tree, Alex," Jade rolled her eyes.
"Jade!" Everett ran out of the tour bus, with a bottle of wine in his hand and two fancy glasses. "Jade," he stopped in front of her, turned around and looked at her over his shoulder, "Get on my back."
"I beg your bloody pardon?" Jade asked. He was sweating, breathing hard, and his cheeks were red.
"Everett... Are you planning on..." Alex shook his head, "Wow, no! She's going to faint! Estás pendejo o qué? This roof is fragile! You are not in Lyonfort!"
"What's going on here?" Evie asked, very distressed.
"Jade and I are going on Just Date," Everett said, and then got nervous, "Evie, don't look! It's surprise! I don't want you to find out!"
"Well, I've already found out," Evie started to shake, her eyes turning glassy. She clenched her fists, her eyes too, and a lump in her throat threatened to make her cry. "But I suppose you have to do this, don't you Big Guy?"
"It's very necessary," Everett smiled at Evie. How could he smile at her after this?! "Tell Jade to get on my back!"
"What?! Why?!" Jade lost it.
"C-Come on, J-Jade. I-It'll b-be fun," Evie swallowed hard, her voice sounded sad, about to break.
"Jade. Hold on to my neck. Just do it!" Everett said, kneeling in front of her.
"Uhm, maybe?" she hesitated. But Evie grabbed her wrist before she could say anything.
"Do w-what the B-Big G-Guy says," Evie positioned Jade on Everett's strong back. Evie had just broken down inside, shocked that Everett was interested in Jade, devastated to be going through this again. But no, Jade wouldn't watch her fall. So she took a long breath and regained her composure. "A word of advice, Jade. Put your legs around Everett's waist and don't go up screaming."
"Evie, if Jade passes out, at least have alcohol at hand," Alex grumbled, "I'll go see if there's a first aid kit inside. Estoy rodeado de puros pinches locos!"
"Why does Alex say I'm going to faint?" Jade asked, holding on tight to Everett, "This is a bad idea, right? I don't know what it is but this is a bad idea! Alex said it and he always has bad ideas! So it must be a terrible..."
"Whatever," Evie rolled her eyes, "Okay! Fine. Hey Big Guy! Up you go!"
"What are you taking about?" Jade asked as Everett stood up. God! He really was tall! How did he not get dizzy from seeing the world from up here?!
"Hold on tight," Everett said, bent his knees and...
He jumped.
The concrete beneath his feet cracked.
There was a deafening noise, like a tornado all around them.
"Jesus Christ! EVEREEEEETT!" Jade squeezed her eyes shut.
Were they both... Going up at full speed?!
God! Jade felt like her body had left her soul several feet down below!
Everett had taken a huge leap, and both she and him were going up and up through the air like a rocket!
"OH MY GAAAAAAAAAAAAWD!!!!!" Jade screamed. The wind felt like a thousand blades cutting her skin.
Then, Everett stopped accelerating.
There was silence, an out-of-body sensation, like standing on a cloud.
Jade dared to look down... She shouldn't have.
They were easily about thirty feet off the ground!
A pigeon flew by, relaxed and unhurried, next to Jade.
"God I'm going to die," Jade swallowed hard.
This wasn't even the worst part. This was only the beginning of the worst part!
They were about to fall from the sky!
Then came the sensation of floating in the air, it was a second, less than that and then...
"JEEEEESUS CHRAAAAAHIST!" Jade screamed as she descended at full speed. Her stomach had been torn out of her body and thrown in a blender. It was over. She wouldn't survive. What happened after death? Would the afterlife look exactly like this?
She clung with her arms and legs to Everett, gritting her teeth as she descended fast, too fast!
"GOD! PLEASE LET ME LIVE!" Jade cried.
Now the fall was faster, her skin was burning, her heart was going to jump out of her chest, and her stomach... Fuck! That one stayed up there with the pigeon!
Then there was a loud impact, a deafening sound too, like a wrecking ball.
Everett grunted... And everything stopped.
She continued clenching her teeth, eyes, and anything else she could clench when there was silence.
"Jade, open your eyes." Everett whispered.
Through some dust, she saw the cracked floor beneath them, then looked up, coughing a little. There was a nice table with an Italian style tablecloth and two chairs here on the roof.
"Is this the roof of the restaurant? What is this?" Jade asked as Everett knelt down and she climbed off his back a little dizzy. She was pale and shaky.
"Just Date," Everett answered.
Jade sat down when he pulled a chair for her. He opened the bottle with a corkscrew that he had in his pocket, poured a glass and handed it to her.
"Drink this. It's romantic," he handed her the wine.
"I didn't know you could jump like that," she took a light sip of her drink with a shaky hand.
"We Yeti move through mountains jumping, like mountain goats," he said, and once seated, he raised his glass to toast, "Here's to perfect Just Date for most special girl in world!"
She giggled.
"How about... To love?" She raised her own glass to meet his. "Nice place to have a date. I can see grass, and grass, and grass from up here. And very, very far away I can see the many skyscrapers of Phantown."
"I'm glad you like view. I wanted to wait but, I'm in hurry to have perfect date ready, and I came up with this," Everett said, "I think date looking down from above is romantic, but I don't know many nice places in Hallow Woods that have this view. Any ideas?"
"How about a romantic date at the Donjon's battlements? That would be romantic, don't you think?" She winked. "And a little poetry would make any girl fall in love with you, not like the squashed spider, but rather that other thing you said after that."
"You seemed upset today after my failed attempt to be romantic. I hope nothing happens to upset you now," He held her hand and placed it on top of his. "I saw video on YouTube that said holding hands like this is romantic. Should I do it on Real Date?"
"Oh God, Everett, it's super cute."
"Good. I will do that then." He sighed. That was relieving!
"And you have no idea how amazing it was to fly through the air!"
"Really?" he tilted his head slightly.
"Yes! It was scary at first but, I'd like to try it again some other day," Jade smiled, "I see Evie knew what you were going to do."
"I sometimes pick her up after she gets very tired from training Former Hunters in Horse Yard. I take her to her room often." Everett chuckled, "First time she thought I was going to carry her and walk. When I took first leap, I remember she got as shouty as you. Now it's common, and she even screams like she's on roller coaster, throwing hands up," and he did it, making her laugh.
"Someday we'll do that. It would save us a lot of time," Jade laughed, and Everett smiled like never before.
"I'd like that very much," Everett leaned towards her and moved her hair aside. "How was first day as bodyguard? Did everything go okay?"
"Boring. I thought there would be more action," Jade rolled her eyes. "I'd like to be in a real fight someday!"
"I would like to teach you Zagarrtan martial arts. It's complex form of sword ballet, like death dance," Everett said, "Would you like that?"
"Yeah," Jade sighed dreamily, "I think I'd love that."
Her voice was breathless, and Everett liked that too much. It brought back nice memories.
"Good. You must be excited to be bodyguard tonight at Hallow Inn event."
"Wait, what?"
"Evie didn't tell you? You're going to help us capture Angry Blonde's client tonight," Everett said, "And you'll have bodyguard uniform too, but that'll be for when you're Solar Guardian."
"I didn't get that memo."
"Oh. Ah. Okay. Well, I heard on another YouTube video that it's romantic to talk about first time you met girl so... Jade, I still remember first time I heard your voice," Everett blushed, "I remember every word, and..."
"I don't think you can remember every word," Jade laughed, sipping some wine.
"I do." he nodded and cleared his throat, getting lost in infinity, "You woke up in suite and said 'Oh shit... How did I get here?' and I replied 'Alex brought you here' so you yelled 'My God! Everett Frostakov? Oh god! I'm a fan!' and I said 'I know' because of shirt you were wearing. Then I said 'Your survival instincts suck. You should take knife and stab me to escape.' and you asked 'Escape? I don't even have a knife and... No! I'm not going to stab... Oh my god! You're Everett Frostakov! Oh holy Jesus! I'm going to pass out again!' but I said 'You shouldn't faint if someone kidnaps you' and I growled. You said 'And you... Kidnapped me? Well, it's a very comfortable kidnapping' and I said..."
"Fine! I get it," Jade raised her eyebrows, "That's impressive."
"I can repeat your entire interview if you want," Everett said with a firm nod.
"Did you watch it many times?" Jade bit her lip and he shook his head.
"Not even once. But I remember everything," Everett then got lost in infinity. "You were dressed in white Monster Mash T-shirt and purple skirt, and your knees were grey with dust. And your clothes smelled faintly like popcorn."
"That's true. I knelt down at a construction site to look for Mozart, and Melody and I made popcorn before watching the live stream of the concert but... Wow! Zeth was right. You have an impressive memory!" Jade blinked a lot.
"I'll memorize everything about this Just Date for when it's time for Real Date," Everett said, "Thanks for your help, Jade. You're great friend."
"You just called me a friend after taking me on a date," Jade frowned.
"Well, yes," Everett sounded confused, "Because we're friends, aren't we?"
"I thought we weren't," Jade crossed her arms.
"Oh. I'm sorry. I didn't know I wasn't your friend and... Forgive me for asking you this favour?"
"A date is not a favour, Everett," Jade frowned, "You don't take someone on a date unless it's for a future relationship."
"You're right, that's why I asked you for help in having perfect date," Everett really didn't understand anything, "I think we could talk about this on way home. For now, let's focus on..."
"Hey, Frostakov," it was Zeth's voice. Jade and the Big Guy turned to see the leader of the band, dusty and with some pebbles stuck in his hair. He was fuming, "Got. A. Minute?"
"Zeth! What happened to you?!" Jade gasped.
"I'm on Just Date, come back later," Everett growled.
"No. You're in debt," Zeth removed a pebble from his hair, "You're lucky you only cracked the roof! Imagine if..."
And then there was a terrible crash.
BROOOOM!
A part of the roof collapsed, the exact spot where Everett had landed. A large circular part fell with a loud bang, Draco screamed downstairs, and a hole appeared a few feet away from Jade and Everett.
"Fuck!" Draco shouted down the stairs, "Fuck! Help! I'm getting... Crushed by a... Rock!"
"I told you not to stand under the cracks! Por qué eres tan pinche necio, carajo?!" Alex's voice came from the hole, "Everett! Come down here and help us free Draco from the rubble!"
"Oops," Everett blushed. He turned to see Zeth, laughing in Nervous Yeti, but Zeth crossed his arms and grunted. Jade just took a sip of the wine and suddenly the grass looked very interesting. "At least Draco has healing powers?"
"I hope your wallet does too," Zeth frowned. "Anyway... Jade, when we get to Lyonfort, tell Evie and BC-13 that their new bodyguard uniforms and Taser Guns are..."
"I'll go back with you guys on the tour bus, I need to talk to Everett about a couple of things regarding this date," Jade nodded, "But I'll tell them."
"Good. And you'll be helping us capture Kasey's client," Zeth said, "I hope it won't be too much trouble. You'll have a uniform too."
"Oh! Sure! It'll be fun! My uniform doesn't have heels, right?"
"No, not yours. Your feet are normal, right?" Zeth asked as Everett stood up and approached the hole, glancing over with a finger on his chin. "Now what?!"
"Hole isn't that big, maybe no one will notice." Everett said but Zeth growled.
"A fucking car fits in that hole, Frostakov! And... Argh! I better call my lawyer already," and then Zeth took out his phone.