CH 104

–Damn it.

I saw it. I saw it. I didn’t want to see it, but I saw it.

(Shiho… should at least close the curtains properly.)

It’s usually closed properly. Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t see her face, but only today … it was open just a little bit.

Through the thinly opened gap, I could slightly see Shiho’s room.

There was this guy there who I hated. And he was patting … Shiho’s head.

(Why you ……! You don’t have anything, you’re inferior to me …… why are you the one chosen by Shiho? Nakayama!)

I can’t see Nakayama’s face. But I could see Shiho’s happy face.

She never made a face like that at me. I didn’t know she could smile like that.

(Why am I not there ……? Why is Nakayama there? I don’t know …… am I that much of a lesser human being???)

No. I can’t stop being annoyed. I can’t stop being frustrated. But I can’t take my eyes off Shiho’s room.

What are you two talking about? Hey, Nakayama……, what are you saying to Shiho to trick her?

I’m curious. I don’t want to care, but I can’t help but care.

That’s why I can’t help but look at it. Because of that, I… I witnessed the moment when Shiho pushed Nakayama down.

“……”

I was speechless.

I couldn’t say anything and almost collapsed unexpectedly.

(My childhood friend is mine, and yet ……)

Even though we live so close to each other, so close that we can go back and forth to … our rooms whenever we want to!

We were born in the same hospital, grew up in the same kindergarten, attended the same preschool, studied in the same elementary school, went to the same middle school, and entered the same high school!

(Why wasn’t it me? …)

I still haven’t healed from the wounds of my first love.

I’ve been chasing Shiho for a long time.

I want to be recognized by her.

I want to repay Nakayama for taking Shiho away from me.

Otherwise…, I was not going to be able to recover myself.

Shall I just collapse? As a loser who was robbed of a childhood friend, will I never be able to fall in love again in the future? …… I didn’t think it would drag on this long even though I was only dumped by one girl…

It’s regrettable. Just so frustrating.

But I didn’t know what to do, so I …… was about to give up on everything right then and there ……. that moment.

“Hey, Ryoma♪! Dinnertime pizza and a coke! Even if I can’t cook, I can do anything if I have enough money!”

Mary came to my room.

I remember she said something like, ‘Wait in your room while I prepare dinner for you tonight.’ I had forgotten all about that because I was looking at Shiho’s room…

“Ryoma? What’s wrong? You look so gloomy!”

“…It’s nothing.”

“Really? Then, it’s nothing!”

Mary laughed.

She tapped me on the shoulder with a bright smile on her face, just as she always does.

“Ryoma? I’m on your side no matter what, okay? I will be there for you when you have a hard time. I’ll be there for you until you get better. So …… don’t be too hard on yourself, okay?”

…Maybe Mary is aware of my change of heart.

Yet, she is there for me without saying a word. Without doing anything unnecessary, she just stood by me.

Thanks to her, I somehow managed not to fall apart.

I no longer have a childhood friend, but instead I have Mary. A girl who is just as pretty as Shiho, can do everything better than Shiho, and comes from a better family, but she cares about me so much.

I am happy to know that, perhaps even more than Nakayama.

“I’m so grateful to Mary. Mary has really lifted my spirits.”

I’m not very sensitive about love.

But I know how Mary feels about …… me.

I understand that she likes me somehow.

Then that’s all right.

If not Shiho, then if Mary is next to me, that’s fine.

If that’s the case,… it’s time for me to make up my mind.

(Okay…, I’ll confess my feelings after the school festival.)

I’m going to make Mary my girlfriend.

Then I will finally … be able to stop feeling inferior to Nakayama.

I couldn’t wait for that day to come.