Narrator's pov
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Honesty, it can either cause more harm than good or it can build a relationship stronger than it was
Either way, we take a risk with it. Some say, lies lead to more problems while others say lies keeps a person happy and spares their heart
But why must we fear the truth. Feelings are hurt more and more everyday as those lies continue to build up. Then we regret not being honest that first time so we can earn that trust back and build a stronger foundation of our bond
But either way, Ember wasn't going back down that road of lying. She wanted Gabrielle to see her for the real person she is rather than just a flirty girl that was trying to get into her pants
What image was she really trying to portray? A sex addict or someone that was patient and ready to take steps with her?
"What do you mean by that?" Gabrielle questioned
"You want me to be honest with you, right? You want to know what I'm really about?"
"Yes"
"Then sit back and listen to the story of my life"
"I knew there was more to it" Gabrielle chuckled, sinking herself deeper into her seat
"I'm listening" she whispered, holding a smile on her lips
Ember chuckled softly as she mirrored the girl's position, sinking herself into her booth and crossing her arms across her chest
That girl was surely going to make her lose her mind someday
"Remember when I told you that my parents are surgeons?"
"Yes"
"Well they're surgeons at the Atkins Hospital" Ember mumbled
"Isn't that like the top five hospitals in this country?"
"Yes"
"What does that have to do with you?" Gabrielle asked
"Well you see. My name.."
"Uh huh?"
"Is Ember Atkins" Ember finally squeaked out
It took a second for the blonde to understand, her brows furrowed as she tilted her head to the side, shaking it slightly as to give indication for her to continue
But then it had finally hit her
"Holy. Fucking. Shit" She said between breaths
"My parents own that hospital and yes I'm only now studying business but I've been studying since I was able to walk. I've always been in charge of their finances and as time grew, I was placed in charge of the hospital finances, along with many lawyers ofcourse. But I'm the head of everything there is to be worked out about that hospital. We're all board members, but I tend to do my own things sometimes" Ember said furrowing her brows, tightening her arms across her chest
Gabrielle knew in just that second that she needed to drop all of her questions and shock, it was clear that Ember was struggling with something in that story
"Why's that?" the girl asked
"Because, it was too much pressure. Do you know what it's like to be groomed at such a long age to take over an entire hospital, something that everyone depends on? Don't even get me started on the dissapointment they felt when I flaked out and chose business instead of science" Ember scoffed
"Why did you choose business?"
"It's... Far much easier than putting someone's life in my hands"
"The doctor life wasn't made for you"
"Basically, yes. I don't want to be a doctor, hell I don't know what I want. But I didn't have that option, I always had to do what they said and that landed me a role on the board of fucking directors of a hospital I need to run in a few years when they decide they want to retire" Ember hissed, her teeth grinding against each other as she turned her head to look away
Something about having Gabrielle's eyes on her during her heated moment was going to burn holes into her body. But only if she had kept eye contact, she would have probably seen that the blonde held the most sympathetic eyes towards her
"So I lashed out. I was tired of always being pulled out of school to work on budgets, I was tired of never having any time for my damn self. All of that anger... It built up inside me to the point where it demanded to be released"
"And how did you release it?" Gabrielle questioned
"There was... A few people in my school that liked to bend rules. I was tired of rules so I eventually started hanging out with them, for guidance. They were... Intense at first but I eventually started to fit it. But I had to do what they said to join their clan or whatever the fuck that meant"
"That doesn't sound good... What did you do?"
"It started small with a few parties here and there... But then it started turning to pills.... Then alcohol mixed with the pills. Women started dancing with me, things always led to another and... "
"Oh" Gabrielle mumbled
"They'd leave their numbers but I'd never call them back, I'd just move on to the next. Feel what I wanted in the moment. I thought sex was sex. Never took feelings into consideration because frankly, I couldn't feel anything. And God knows that's all I desperately wanted. I wanted to feel nothing. I wanted to feel empty. I didn't care who I hurt, they didn't care they I was hurt, why should I?" Ember muttered, sinking her teeth into her bottom lip
"Do you.. Still feel.. Or think like that?"
"Oh God no. I've left that part of me behind, turned a new leaf the day I woke up on a hill with no clothes, no phone and no money. Something always happens to you in order for you to get your shit together. I was 16 then and I'm 20 now and every day I'm still trying" Ember whispered
The golden eyed girl stayed silent just as Ember, but something was going on on her mind that Ember didn't expect. She didn't need to take anything in, frankly she didn't care. But to know the truth was very much appreciated, atleast now she knew she wasn't just a prey to be hunted after
But it wasn't like she was going to allow anything happen either
So she leaned over, the soft tips of her fingers touching the back of Ember's hands as she pulled them away from her chest and placed them flat on the table
Ember furrowed her brows, confused and taken back by what was happening but allowed it either way
She was tense, there was only one person that knew of that story and that was Fallon. Her past had been buried so far in her mind that it was completely forgotten
But she would never stop feeling the guilt inside for the mistakes she's made.
Her body was tense, her muscles contracted as she grinded her teeth against each other, thinking of her past always brought back feelings that she tried to stray so far away from. The fire started to burn inside, slowly climbing her like a ladder, touching every nerve on its way up. So many nights, rolling her eyes at the girls that stood in front of her in tears, desperately pleading for an explanation of why they were tossed around and played with for no reason. She'd simply shrug and watch them crumble while she grabbed the next woman that stood nearby and started her loop again
Ember shutted her eyes tightly, feeling that fire starting to reach her throat. But when she least expected it, a warm and comforting hand was placed in her own. They were perfect, baby soft and smooth, like silk. Ember tensed momentarily before she relaxed her posture
"I don't know if anyone's said this but I will. I'm so proud of you Ember Atkins" Gabrielle said, catching the girl off-guard
Ember furrowed her brows and tilted her head to the side
"It takes someone strong to realize they're in deep. That they've made a mistake. It takes someone strong to realize they want to change, for the better and you did that. Now here you are, sitting here in one of the warmest place and I'm sure your heart is just as warm. I admire you for that, and thank you.. For sharing that with me. I know it must have been hard to think about. To dig up the past just to explain to me your intentions, thank you for that. So once again, I'd just like to say I'm proud of you for everything you've done and where you're heading to. I'm sure you'll do just amazing" Gabrielle chuckled
Here we bring ourselves back to that conversation of crush. It catches us when we least expect it. It takes one second for us to realize it and God when we do, we wish we could pretend it didn't exist
Ember's eyes couldn't find the will to leave Gabrielle's golden honey orbs, her small giggle made her heart swell in her chest and the warm feeling of the girl's hands in hers sent shock waves through her body, leaving tingles on her skin
There was something in the way she laughed that reminded Ember of her better self. There is something pure in the way she struggled to do what was right, it was an honesty
She had the kind of creative brain that brought such magic and interest to life, one that enjoyed the sparking of ideas.
So, there she sat across the table from a girl she had no idea if she was her friend
But she knew she was starting to have a crush on her, a straight girl. One that could last as such gentle admiration does
To summarize it, she was in deep shit