Chapter 95 Heading Home With Mixed Feelings

Translated by Twelve_Months_of_May

Gu Mingxi, welcome home!

On Monday, Pang Qian returned to the primary school and found the atmosphere tranquil and relaxed, distinctly different from the weekend.

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The school ground were filled with students. When class was over, big and small kids rushed out to the playground to play wildly. From their clothes, they all looked like they were from ordinary families. When the bell sounded for classes to resume, they all ran back into classroom. Standing at the playground, you could hear the sounds of students in the two story building reading out loud.

Pang Qian outside the window and looked in at Gu Mingxi.

She stood outside the back door to the room so none of the students noticed her. They were holding their books and following along as Gu Mingxi read out loud in English. Gu Mingxi was at the lectern reading, when he lifted his head and saw Pang Qian. He smiled briefly and then continued reading seriously.

Pang Qian held her arms and watched him quietly. She recalled the last time they’d met six years ago in Shanghai. That was probably the most distressing time in Gu Mingxi’s life. Pang Qian occasionally remembered the parting look in his eyes back then.

Time had left a lot of marks on his body. Under the Hainan sun, his skin had gotten darker, but he was also more rugged and healthy now. His hair was trimmed neatly, the back of his neck shaved cleanly. Under the eyebrows that were hidden by his bangs, there was a pair of quiet and reserved eyes.

He had a clean cut face, very manly and handsome, but there was always the trace of a smile on his face. He never minded the strange looks from strangers, and it never stressed him out. He would very naturally ask others to help when he needed it. For example, he’d have the taxi driver take the money from his pocket, or he’d ask one of the other teachers to bring in the recorder for English class.

He was different from his time as a student. Today’s Gu Mingxi didn’t have a single piece of name brand clothing. He wore sandals on his feet all year round, but he was always sure to keep them clean. He bent over and turned the page of the English book on the lectern, his attention focused on the class. Once in awhile, he would lift his foot up high to write on the blackboard.

His posture looked very strange, but the students in his class didn’t seem to think so. As he wrote across the board from left to right, he would have to move his body too. Sometimes he wouldn’t bother putting down his right leg, and he would just hop over on his left leg. And when he hopped, his shirt sleeves would swing in the air. From outside the room, Pang Qian’s heart followed along and jumped.

Ji Xiu’er was carrying her books as she stopped next to Pang Qian. In a quiet voice, she said, “Ms. Pang.”

Pang Qian turned around and saw Ji Xiu’er smiling at her. She said, “Ms. Pang, is Teacher Gu returning to E City soon?”

Pang Qian opened her mouth but didn’t end up saying anything. Instead, she nodded.

Ji Xiu’er looked into the classroom window ad Gu Mingxi and said, “He should go back. You know, I’ve been here for a year, but I’ve never seen Teacher Gu as happy as he was today.”

Pang Qian, “…”

“I was probably ‘My Miss Crab’s first ready,” Ji Xiu’er said. “I would watch as he was drawing. At the time, I asked him if Miss Crab really existed. Teacher Gu smiled and told me he didn’t know. He said that maybe in every boy’s heart, there existed a Miss Crab, and in every girl’s memories, there existed a Mister Ostrich. Sometimes we just don’t know it.”

She forced herself to hold in her tears as she said, “I really envy you, that you were able to find your Mister Ostrich. I’m also happy for Teacher Gu as well, that his time of bitterness can end and he can start his journey of sweetness.”

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The bell rang to signal the end of class. Pang Qian entered the classroom and saw a group of sixth graders surrounding Gu Mingxi, asking him questions. He patiently explained to them and finally realized that Pang Qian was present. Each one of the kids started shouting out, “Teacher Gu! Is this your girlfriend?”

Pang Qian helped Gu Mingxi carry his recorder, books, and lessons. Gu Mingxi turned back to look at her and smiled at the students. “That’s right, this is my girlfriend.”

Several jolly students rushed to shout out, “Hello, Teacher Gu’s wife!”

Pang Qian nearly exploded with laughter.

Pang Qian stayed in Sanya with Gu Mingxi and Dou Dou for New Year’s. Every day, she would sit around at the school. When Gu Mingxi went to class, she would stay in the dorm and watch TV. Occasionally, she would go online and take care of some work.

At lunchtime, Pang Qian followed Gu Mingxi to get an employee’s meal box. The food was very simple but Pang Qian didn’t care. Gu Mingxi always gave the meat in his lunch to her, and Pang Qian didn’t refuse it, shoveling the food into her mouth. A delighted smile appeared on Gu Mingxi’s face.

When the New Year’s break came, Gu Mingxi finally had some free time, so he took Pang Qian and Dou Dou around for two days.

They went to Wuzhizhou Island, Tianya Haijiao, and even went to see the Guanyin of the South Sea of Sanya. In the evening, they returned to Gu Mingxi’s house by Sanya Bay for a seafood dinner.

Being able to keep such a hyper kid like Dou Dou under control, Pang Qian felt very happy. This was her first true date with Gu Mingxi. She let herself indulge and stayed right beside Gu Mingxi, sometimes wrapping her arms around his waist for a hug.

The taste of dating was so wonderful. The temperature of Gu Mingxi’s body, his eyes, his smile, and his scent all kept Pang Qian infatuated. The beach at Sanya was a romantic haven, and Pang Qian walked along the shallow waters with Gu Mingxi. When the feeling was right, she would stand on her tip toes and look up at him before enjoying a deep kiss.

Dou Dou covered his eyes as he stood to the side. As he called out, “Teacher Gu, shame, shame! I’m not looking!” he would still spread his fingers and secretly take a glance at the intimate scene before him.

After New Year’s, every company entered their end of year hustle period, and Jialai Investments was no different. Even though she was on vacation, her business phone kept ringing with call after call.

Gu Mingxi often heard her answering the phone. Sometimes it was her team leader, sometimes it was a coworker, and sometimes it was even a client.

When she spoke about work, Gu Mingxi could understand about half of her conversation. Sometimes Pang Qian would speak completely in English as she was communicating with Europe or Hong Kong. Her English was very fluent and her tone was good. Probably because it was riddled with jargon used in the financial sector, but no matter how carefully Gu Mingxi tried to listen, he couldn’t understand.

Gu Mingxi realized that while Pang Qian often giggled about and seemed rathe simple-minded, when she answered a work related call, she changed completely. When she spoke to clients, her voice was gentle, soft, and polite. When she spoke to her subordinates, she was concise, a bit tough and sometimes cold. When she spoke to her team leader, she changed once again.

“Team Leader…” Pang Qian was laying on Gu Mingxi’s bed, grumbling into the phone. “I’m on vacation. It’s been a long time since I’ve seen my boyfriend, so can’t you just help me take care of it for a bit. We agreed on two weeks vacation, and that I’d be back on January 8th… I know it’s really busy at the end of the year… Okay, I’ll try to get back a few days earlier.”

After she hung up the phone, Pang Qian raised her head to look over at Gu Mingxi, who was sitting on the edge of the bed. She apologized, “I’m sorry, it’s busy at work. I’ll probably have to head back early.”

Gu Mingxi shook his head. “It’s okay, work is important. Look, you’ve been here for several days now, but I haven’t been able to spend much time with you. You’re always waiting around at school, so you must be really bored.”

Pang Qian plopped down next to him and hugged him. She said, “It’s not boring. As long as I’m with you, it’s good.”

The day she left, Pang Qian and Gu Mingxi took a walk along the sea together.

There was a bit of beach nearby the primary school that had palm trees. It was the only place there that hadn’t been turned into a resort area.

The sand there wasn’t very fine. Gu Mingxi and Pang Qian walked along the shore, side by side. There was no one else around. The only sounds came from the waves crashing against the rocks and whistling sound of the see breeze.

Away from the steel and concrete cities, life here was very simple and pure. Pang Qian could feel Gu Mingxi’s mood. In the past days, he rarely spoke to her about his hardships in the past few years. What he spoke about most was the happiness he felt after he came to Sanya.

Gu Mingxi would talk about his students, as if each of them were a part of his family. The primary school was a Hope school (Note: See Project Hope), so the school facilities, software, and teachers couldn’t compare to those at public schools. Most of the students that enrolled there were kids from migrant families or families in difficult situations.

Gu Mingxi told Pang Qian that he felt that for some kids, studying was the most fair and suitable path to change their fate. So when it came to teaching, he never slacked off.

“I always thought you were doing post-graduate studies,” Gu Mingxi said. “Pang Pang, why didn’t end up going back to school?”

Pang Qian looked at him. “Work is busy, with one job coming in after another. If I were to tell Team Leader that I was going to resign and go back to school, he’d probably kill me.”

She told Gu Mingxi about her relationship with Zou Liwem. From Shanghai to E City, Zou Liwen had taught Pang Qian a lot of things. And if it weren’t for him, during the financial crisis, the then-rookie Pang Qian would have probably been out of a job.

Pang Qian smiled and said, “Actually, sometimes I think that Team Leader and I are really alike. Working under him, I really have peace of mind. If he weren’t so cold and different from you, I really might have fallen for him.”

Gu Mingxi squinted at her and asked, “What kind of feeling do I give off?”

“It’s…” Pang Qian looked up at him and laughed. “When you were hovering around me every day, I didn’t think that there was anything special about you, and sometimes you even felt annoying. But later on, when you disappeared from my side, I couldn’t find another person who was just like you.”

She gently embraced him and said, “Gu Mingxi, you spoiled me rotten, you know. Spoiling me for so many years, I started feeling like everything was a matter of course. It wasn’t until afterwards that I realized that no one else would spoil me the same way.”

Gu Mingxi stood on the beach, the tranquil sea beside him. The waves gently kissed the rocks, the wind blew at the hairs by their ears. A cold, crescent moon hung in the sky, the white moonlight casting down onto the water. The light on the waves shimmered like silver scales.

There was a lighthouse in the distance, its red light shining to the sea to guide the sea vessels home. Gu Mingxi looked at the lighthouse, and the wind blew against his empty shirt sleeves. He didn’t say anything, but he gave Pang Qian an answer in his heart.

–Yes, Pang Pang. I also wouldn’t be able to spoil another girl the same way.

Three days after New Year’s, Pang Qian’s vacation time was over. She reluctantly bid farewell to Gu Mingxi and flew back to the busy work in the city.

She told her parents about Gu Mingxi, but she didn’t tell them that he would be coming back to E City for the (Chinese) New Year. Pang Shuisheng was very excited, but Jin Ai’hua was a bit glum.

When she took a walk with Pang Qian, Jin Ai’hua asked her daughter, “What kind of work is Gu Mingxi doing now?”

“Primary school teacher,” Pang Qian replied. “He teaches English, math, and art.”

“Does he have a degree?”

“No,” Pang Qian shook her head.

“He never went back to school?”

Pang Qian continued shaking her head, “No.”

“So he only has a high school diploma?” Jin Ai’hua was both surprised and sorry. “It’s a shame. Gu Mingxi was such a good student.”

Pang Qian was speechless.

Over the weekend, she went shopping with Zheng Qiaoqiao. Pang Qian dragged her to the male clothing section to pick out a down coat. She also bought a bunch of male winter clothing, top to bottom, inside and outside, filling up eight shopping bags.

Zheng Qiaoqiao was stupefied. “Crab, you have a boyfriend?”

Pang Qian’s face was all smiles as she nodded, “Mm!”

“Who is it? The one from the bank before? Yu something or other?”

“Nope, you know him.”

“I know him?” Zheng Qiaoqiao was startled. “It’s not Xie Yi, is it?”

“Have you gone crazy!” Pang Qian shouted out loud. She dragged Zheng Qiaoqiao to the floor below, to a book store. Pang Qian picked up a copy of ‘My Miss Crab’ and handed it to Zheng Qiaoqiao. “You’re so behind on the news. Haven’t you heard about this book? It’s really popular now. Hurry and buy a copy to read when you get home. After you read it, you’ll understand.”

Zheng Qiaoqiao looked at the image of an ostrich and crab on the cover of the book. Surprised, she asked, “You found Gu Mingxi?”

Pang Qian smiled, “That’s right!”

Gu Mingxi’s winter break started early. After the final exams concluded, Dou Dou’s mother came from Guangdong to bring him home for (Chinese) New Year. Gu Mingxi called Pang Qian and told her he’d already bought a plane ticket back to E City. He’d stay at Shark’s place for the time being.

“I haven’t seen Shark in a long time, and I miss him,” Gu Mingxi said. “He said he’d close his shop in Shanghai a bit earlier for the New Year’s and would head back to E City. He said if I headed back a bit earlier, we could have a drink together.”

Pang Qian worried, “I originally wanted to go back to pick you up from Sanya. Will you be okay taking the plane on your own?”

“I’ll be fine.” Gu Mingxi laughed lightly. “Every year, I to back to Z City to visit my mom’s grave, and I go on my own then too. I can take care of myself, Pang Pang. Don’t worry.”

“I’ll go to Z City with you this Qingming (Note: also known as ‘Tomb Sweeping Day’),” Pang Qian said. “I’ll come with you to visit Auntie, okay?”

Gu Mingxi responded, “My mom will definitely be very happy to see you visit.”

The day before he departed, Gu Mingxi sat in his Sanya Bay house packing up. He worked slowly and with much effort, but he wasn’t impatient at all. He just continued to slowly pack his things.

He sat on the floor, using his feet to fold his clothes one by one and put them into plastic bags. Finally, he put the plastic bags neatly into his backpack. Midway through packing, he stood up and headed to the bathroom to grab his toothbrush, a towel, a razor…

He’d moved many times. At the start, it was his mother who packed his things for him. But later on, he was left on his own.

He learned how to pack up his things and call for a moving company to move them for him. As for himself, he only carried a single, large backpack.

In his bag, he put his most important belongings. His passport, ID card, bank card, a photo of him and his mother, a picture of Pang Qian, and some gadgets.

He didn’t want to risk having these items mailed because he’d once lost a box of things in the mail. Gu Mingxi felt terrible thinking that he might lose the things that belonged to him and Li Han, so every time he moved, he would keep certain things on his body.

After he finished packing, Gu Mingxi didn’t sleep until late. He got off his bed and went to turn the light on in the living room.

He stood in the middle of the room and looked around. His house was decorated very simply because at the time, he didn’t really have any money. He remembered when he first arrived in Sanya. It was a winter day and he’d flown in from the cold Northern regions. When he got off the plane, with the sun shining down on his head, Gu Mingxi felt a bit dizzy.

Shark waited for him at the terminal. When he saw him, he quickly helped him take off his coat. “The winters here are 30 degrees (86 F), be careful about heat stroke!”

As the taxi drove down the streets of Sanya, Gu Mingxi looked around curiously. The sky here was cloudy or foggy, and there wasn’t a biting wind. Instead, there was a warm sun and clear blue skies decorated with white clouds. As the car drove along the coast, they passed coconut trees, the drooping branches of large banyan trees, and bougainvilleas in full bloom. The Southern feel was very charming.

Shark was the one who first found the building on the Sanya Bay with a great sea view. He brought Gu Mingxi there to check out houses, and when Gu Mingxi stepped out onto the balcony, he was completely mesmerized by the view of the sea.

Shark pat his shoulders and lit a smoke. He said, “Not bad, right? I knew you’d like it. They have smaller apartments too, so think about it.”

Gu Mingxi really liked one of the smaller places. At the time, the house was all grey and roughly done, but the sea was still visible from the balcony. He walked around the house several times, thinking to himself that this is where he would settle down.

In the past few years, Gu Mingxi was like an ant moving house. He gradually brought things home, and then in the end, he brought back a little boy.

After Dou Dou came along, the house got a lot noisier and messier. But Gu Mingxi felt that this made it feel more like a home.

Gu Mingxi wouldn’t deny that he’d genuinely considered settling down in Sanya. Even if it was thousands of miles away from his hometown, even if he had no relatives in this place, he’d thought before that he could be a happy island dweller here.

The past only existed in his dreams. The ideals and ambitions he once had, the people he wanted to work hard for, none of them were by his side anymore.

Gu Mingxi sometimes felt as if he were in a trance. Without realizing it, step by step, he’d ended up in this place.

When he walked on the school grounds, the students would run over to him and happily call out, “Teacher Gu!”

In his sixth grade class, there were two students, a boy and a girl. The boy was originally from Guangxi and his parents were working in Sanya. The girl was a Sanya native. The two of them had grown up together, lived close to each other, and went to and from school together. They were especially good friends.

But before final exams, the girl had appeared in Gu Mingxi’s office. She cried as she said that the boy would be returning back to Guangxi after graduation.

Look, right beside us, there were always stories of parting. Gu Mingxi could only comfort her by saying that when she went to junior high, she would meet lots of new friends. When that time came, it wouldn’t be so hard.

“You can write letters or call each other or chat on QQ,” Gu Mingxi said. “If there’s a chance, you can even meet up again.”

“What if we can’t meet again?! (crying sounds)” the girl cried in despair. “Teacher Gu, I don’t want new friends! I don’t want to separate from Qiu Zixuan!”

Gu Mingxi looked at this girl quietly and didn’t try to console her again. No matter what anyone had to say, their words would pale here. No one else would understand the bitterness and pain of (some one else’s) goodbye.

She finally dried her tears and left the office. Gu Mingxi sat at his desk, staring ahead blankly. Awhile later, he lifted his head and looked out the window.

Outside the window, the sky was blue. Knowing that he would be leaving here, he couldn’t help feeling a deep sense of sadness and a bit apprehensive of the future.

The next morning, Gu Mingxi woke up early and carried his backpack into Sanya Phoenix Airport.

A volunteer at the airport helped him with his security check. When he boarded the plane, the Sanya sky was clear and the sun was shining, with an air temperature of 25 C. Three hours later, the plane landed at the E City airport. Gu Mingxi got off the plane and went to board the airport bus. He wasn’t wearing much and the wind blew against his face. He was a bit unaccustomed to it now and he stopped in his steps.

He walked out of the terminal with the crowd and Gu Mingxi found a familiar figure.

A coat prepared for him was hanging on Pang Qian’s arm as she waved vigorously towards him. “Gu Mingxi! Over here!”

Gu Mingxi walked over to her, his swaying, empty shirt sleeves catching the eyes of others. But then they saw a young woman rush toward him and throw herself at him, before embracing him tightly.

She stood on her toes and gave him a sweet kiss, and then quickly pulled off his backpack to help him put a coat on. Then she looked up at him, her face full of joy, and said, “Gu Mingxi, welcome home!”