Chapter 3

Lexi

September 29th, 2016 | 12:00 pm

Lexi was barely paying attention to what the new principal was saying. Her eyes were on Austin and the random girl he was sitting next to. Lexi tried not to think about it right now but her heart got the best of her and it remained in her thoughts.

"A philosophy class will be required for graduation."

The second the words left Principal Wheeler's mouth, protests broke out among the bleachers.

Lexi herself didn't care. Why would it matter that much anyway? It was just one more class on the mountain of problems the seniors had to deal with. Taking a philosophy class was minor compared to the other things going on in her life.

The woman went on and on about mental health breaks, new parking procedures, college counseling, she had some big ideas for a school with an eighty percent graduation rate. It wasn't that the town was poor, one part of the town was extremely wealthy. Last year Lexi had been to a few parties on that side of town and was surprised to see how big the houses were. The problem was the other side of town filled with kids who dropped out or found no interest in school. It was clear to Lexi, these new policies were being made to get the poor side of town to stay in school. Lexi wondered if they knew the only reason most kids showed up was for a free meal.

After the assembly ended, Lexi went to lunch and ended up eating outside after she realized she had nowhere to sit anymore. It was then when Lexi realized she didn't have any friends anymore. What had those boys said earlier about her? Something about Austin sleeping with random girls all summer. Lexi hadn't believed it at first, but after today she did. It was clear Austin had moved on and left her. Lexi decided to call Macy. She answered on the first ring.

"Hello, Macy speaking," she said when the call went through.

"Hey, Macy," she said. "It's Lexi."

"Lexi? Is everything okay?"

"Would I be calling if things were great?" she asked sarcastically.

"What's wrong?" Macy asked.

"You were right," Lexi mumbled. "He moved on."

"I'm sorry, Lexi," she said sympathetically.

"He's been with different girls all summer and I'm back and he hasn't even spoken to me once."

"Lexi," Macy said, sighing. "We talked about this."

"Yeah, I know," Lexi said roughly. "But it always sounded like we were talking about a worst-case scenario, not what would actually happen."

"I know, Lexie," she said soothingly.

"So what am I supposed to do?"

"Come to the rec center today," she encouraged.

"For a group therapy meeting?" Lexi asked.

"It won't be as bad as you think," she said kindly.

"Fine," Lexi agreed.

"Things will get better, Lexi."

"I hope so," Lexi said quietly.

She hung up and went to her locker before her next class. When she had made her schedule for this year last spring, she had made sure she and Austin were in all of the same classes, but now seeing him in practically every class was a painful and tragic reminder of all that had happened. Just before getting to class, Lexie had pretty much had enough of all the stares and whispers as she walked by, so she decided to ditch. Lexie was grabbing her stuff from her locker when she noticed some of her old friends staring at her. She turned and caught them. They all looked away but one of them held her gaze and eventually came over when the rest of them left.

"Hey Lexie," she said kindly.

"Hi Maeve," Lexie said back.

She liked Maeve, she was a little dark and messed up, but she had always been nice to Lexie.

"I just thought you should know, we are not icing you out because of Austin, it's just that Austin and Rick just have the connections you know?"

"For the good drugs, yeah I get it," Lexie said dryly.

"You know friends take sides," she said, trying to explain.

"Yeah, and you took his side, whatever."

"Lexie, we can still-"

"Don't say we can still be friends when Austin isn't around," Lexie said interrupting her.

Maeve tried to hide her embarrassment but her pale skin made her red cheeks quite obvious. Before she could say anything else, Lexie turned and walked away. She had almost made it out of the school when another couple of girls came up to her. The two of them had been standing with a group of people who were now watching as the girls began talking to Lexi.

"So it is true then?" One of the girls asked her. "You and Austin are through?"

"Rachel," the other girl said. "You can't just ask that."

"No whatever, Rachel is it?" Lexie said as a wave of anger rolled over her. "Yeah Austin and I are through, yeah I lost all my friends, and yeah I spent the summer in rehab. So what? How does it affect your life? Do my unfortunate circumstances impact you in any way? I don't think so, so just leave me alone."

Lexie had raised her voice a little too much as Rachel was clearly intimidated by her now. She was cowering behind her friend. Lexie turned and was about to walk away when the other girl spoke up again.

"Whatever psycho," she mumbled under her breath.

"What did you say?" Lexie said, turning back around.

Lexie had stormed back over but someone got to Rachel and her friend before she could.

"Come on Rach," a boy said. "Forget it, let's just go."

Lexi was ready to yell some more but noticed Principal Wheeler making her way towards them, Lexi quickly turned and just kept walking. Eventually, she found herself at the rec center and before she could change her mind she went inside. She was surprised to see the center empty. Lexi walked to Macy's office and found her sitting there.

She too looked surprised to see her. "When I said you should come to one of the meetings, I meant the meetings after school. You ditched, didn't you?

Lexi rolled her eyes. "I needed a mental health break." Lexi sighed as she took a seat across Macy. "I told you, he wants nothing to do with me."

"I know this is hard, but this might be a good thing," she said carefully.

Lexi scoffed. "Yeah, this was exactly what you wanted to happen."

"If you want to make me the villain for wanting a bad influence out of your life then so be it, but we both know the truth."

Lexi looked away. "This wasn't how it was supposed to go."

"I know," Macy said quietly. "You thought you would come back and your knight in shining armor would fix everything."

"Yeah," Lexi mumbled.

"The truth is Lexi, more often than not, we don't get a knight in shining armor to solve all of our problems. We have to pick ourselves up and be our own hero."

"But it's so much harder."

"Believe me, I know," Macy said quietly. "How are things at home?" she asked, changing the subject.

Lexi sighed. "My father is alive so I guess that something."

"Have you two talked?"

"No, but he stared at me for a few seconds," Lexi said softly. "I suppose that's progress."

Macy frowned. "I don't feel comfortable with your situation at home."

"Well, it's a good thing you don't live there."

"Lexi, I worry about you."

"We're fine, it's better than being sent away and you know it."

Macy sighed. "Do you have people?"

"Uh, you maybe, I guess?" Lexi said confusedly.

Macy smiled. "I meant friends, people your age you can rely on."

Lexi shook her head. "As one of them so kindly pointed out today, they all took Austin's side."

Just check in regularly, okay?"

Lexi nodded and soon after she went back home. Macy had said what Lexi was terrified to admit. No one was going to sweep in and fix her, she would have to do it all on her own.