Shark Barbie

Our first day of the expedition was over, and we’d had a great start. The weather was perfect for our work. The last of the six Great Whites had been tagged an hour before sundown, and we pulled the remaining barrels out of the water. We stowed the gear and cleaned up, smiles on all our faces after a busy day. Erik was thrilled with the video we had taken, especially of the seventeen-foot, four-inch female. This giant of a fish weighed about 3,500 pounds and was the second-largest Great White ever to be fitted with a satellite tag. Doc Holliday was looking forward to data on such a big shark. Size mattered, and the big girls had different habits and diets than smaller Great Whites had.

I’d gotten quite wet during the day, so I’d taken a quick shower then changed into shorts and a T-shirt. Chef Boyar was making burritos to order, and I was starving. Mine had chunks of steak and chicken, along with rice, red beans, salsa, cheese, and sour cream. Taking the plate and a big glass of milk, I walked over to a place next to Sally. “Did you have fun today,” she asked.

“Are you kidding me? Today was a dream come true,” I replied. “I don’t ever want to leave.”

“I know what you mean,” she said. “This is the fun part compared to spending time crunching numbers and writing papers.” Theresa, Kyle, Chip, and Dale filled the rest of the table. All of them were graduate students and were in the place I wanted to be in eight more years.

I found out what their lives were like, and they quizzed me on my sudden fame and my modeling career. “I never thought I’d be getting paid to wear a wetsuit,” I said as I rolled my eyes. “My Mom was right; I had my fifteen minutes of fame, and I used that to launch my shark-tagging drive. When Bodyglove saw me doing that, they asked me to model for them. I never expected it to be like this; I was hoping to get some free clothes and a diving trip!” The rest of the table laughed at this. “It just kept building, so I’m riding the current as far as it can take me. College isn’t cheap, you know.”

Chip just about spit out his Coke at this. “You’re not fucking kidding, Vicki. Research science doesn’t pay back a hundred and fifty grand in student loans.”

“Exactly. I’m making money while I can, all in pursuit of my dreams.”

One of the camera guys came in and waved to me. “Erik wants you up on the bridge in ten minutes, something about filming some background scenes,” he said.

“Got it. I better get dessert then.” I collected the empty plates from the table and put them in the racks before I grabbed some desserts for the table. It was apple pie with French vanilla ice cream. I handed out the extras before diving in, moaning in pleasure at the taste. This Boyar chick could cook.

“I’ve never heard of a model eating like you,” Dale teased. “They have one shrimp, and they are full.”

I just laughed at that. “I was a swimmer and diver before I was a model, and I’m still that way,” I said. “I’ve always had a big appetite and high metabolism.”

“You did good today, kid. Not bad for a Sharkbaby,” Chip said.

“Sharkbabe is what they call me online now. My nickname growing up was Sharkbait,” I said. I finished the last of the pie and stood up. “I better get going.”

Brian, the grad student who wasn’t as welcoming, stood up as I did. “Better run along, Shark Barbie. I’m sure they need your tits up on the bridge,” he said.

I froze, my head slowly turning to look at him. “Excuse me?”

“Oh, come on, people,” he said as the room quieted. “Let’s not kid ourselves about what is going on with Shark Barbie, the high school graduate and documentary headliner. Is she here because of her vast experience in shark biology?” He let that sit out there as I fumed. “Is she here because she brings vital knowledge on shark behavior?”

“Don’t be an asshole, Brian,” Sally said.

“Don’t be ignorant, Sally. You and I are working this expedition for free as part of our graduate work, and Discovery Channel is only paying us a hundred and fifty dollars a day to be in their show. Shark Barbie is only qualified to show off her boobs in a bikini and get her t-shirt wet, and she’s getting paid fifty grand! Where is the fairness in that?”

Brian had moved between me and the door, and I didn’t like where this was going. “Step aside, Brian.”

“Why? Are you going to cry, little girl? Or maybe you banged the producer to get this job, and he wants another taste?” I didn’t want to get in a fight on my first day onboard. Brian was pushing my buttons, though. “You don’t belong here. You’re in the way, and you’re taking dive time away from people who are doing real research. Just because the producer wants to showcase your body for ratings doesn’t mean we have to go along with it. Perky tits and a firm ass don’t make you an expert,” he sneered.

“For a graduate student at a research institution, you have no idea of how things work, do you?” He blocked my way, so I continued. “These tits cradled three children as I saved them from drowning. THESE TITS got me national exposure that I used to unveil a shark tagging project in cooperation with the World Wildlife Federation and the University of Miami. THESE TITS helped raise over five million dollars for shark research through our website and personal appearances. THESE TITS got me into boardrooms and dinner parties where I could meet donors. And yes, THESE TITS are part of the reason I’m here. Discovery isn’t here because they want to help your research. They are here because they are filming a show that will bring them big ratings, and pay for their expenses many times over with advertising revenue. I did one earlier this year, and they liked how it turned out. The producer hired me for a bigger role this time because I bring value to his work. It’s a business, Brian. To have a highly-rated show, they want a show host that people will tune in to see.” He didn’t look convinced, and the rest of the room was watching with their mouths hanging open. “Research doesn’t happen without fundraising. Part of fundraising is having people that donors want to meet! Without that, there IS no expedition! So unless your face and abs can carry the show, and I’m pretty sure they can’t, shut the hell up and do your job.”

“You’re such a blonde; you know NOTHING,” Brian said.

“I know if you don’t step out of my way, you’re going to have trouble moving in the morning. I have work to do.” I didn’t have time to deal with his crap.

Of course, he couldn’t just step aside. Instead, he reached out and squeezed my tits with both hands. “They don’t feel like they are worth fifty grand,” he said with a leer. “Maybe fifty bucks.”

That was it. I closed the gap, bending my knees as I grasped Brian around the waist and lifted his weight off his feet. Pushing my shoulder forward as my arms pulled back, I slammed his body to the deck. His breath rushed out of him as my shoulder drove into his solar plexus, and I brought my knee up hard to crunch his nuts. He couldn’t even take a breath to scream out his pain.

I wasn’t done with him yet.

I took the top position, moving up as he tried to roll out to his right side. I got my left arm behind his head to keep it tight to me and keep him from rolling me with his greater size. I put my right arm around his left arm and across his chest until I could grasp my left arm above the elbow. The hold controlled his arms, one underneath us, the other trapped by my arm, and kept his head pinned to my side. He was still struggling and kicking out, so I finished him by moving my left arm up his back and rolling until my left shoulder was on the deck, letting my body weight apply pressure to his neck. My chokehold compressed the artery on the side of his head that went to his brain. “Tap out,” I told him.

“Fuck you,” he said. I kept the pressure on, and five seconds later, he was limp.

I let him go and stood up, looking around the crew’s mess to the shocked faces. “When he wakes, tell him if he ever touches a woman like that without permission, I’ll break both his arms.” Walking out the door, I slammed it shut and walked up the stairs to the main deck.

I couldn’t face anyone, not just yet. I went to the rails and looked over the water instead, the quarter moon just rising to the east over the rolling swell. Tears came to my eyes as I thought back at what just happened. Today had been SO good until now. I felt like I was part of the team, doing what I loved. Was it all just politeness? Did the others resent me for being here like Brian did? Was I just kidding myself, thinking I was more than a pin-up girl?

I heard the bulkhead door open behind me, light spilling out and then going away again as it closed. It was Sally; I could scent her before her hand rubbed my back as she moved next to the rail. “Are you all right?”

I looked at her, and the tears down my face told the story. “This is all I ever dreamed of doing,” I said.

She pulled me into a hug. “The rest of us don’t feel that way,” she said. “You work hard, you listen, and you don’t complain about anything. You have nothing to worry about, Vicki. You belong out here, and you’re doing the job you got hired for.”

“You’re not jealous of me?”

“I wish I had your body, but I can see you’ve worked hard to get it. I wish I had your drive and energy. I’m twenty-seven, and I haven’t accomplished a fraction of what you’ve done in eighteen years.” She let me go, and we went back to looking over the water. “I love it out here. I wish I didn’t have to deal with people like Brian, but they are still out there. You handled him well.”

I shook my head. “I’ll have to deal with him for thirteen more days, and he hates me now.”

“I don’t think he will be a problem,” she said. “What he did was not just inappropriate harassment, it was sexual assault.”

I shook my head. “I’m not filing a complaint. I took care of it.”

“You don’t have to. Theresa and Dale are talking to the Captain and Doctor Holliday right now.” I looked at her in shock. “It was unacceptable behavior, and the team is not going to stand for it. It wasn’t his first time, but this time there were witnesses and proof.”

I suddenly realized what she meant; the Discovery crew had cameras in the crew’s mess recording all the time, so they had the whole thing on video. “This time?”

“Yeah. Theresa and I have dealt with low-level shit from him for years; ‘accidental’ contacts and lewd comments when we are alone. Going after you the way he did will end him. The University has strict policies on this, and he’s going to get what he deserves. Finally.”

“I’ve got to talk to Erik. I don’t want that video to get out.”

She started laughing. “Are you kidding? That scene is going to be ratings GOLD. You stood up to the bully, Vicki. You proved you were more than your tits, and you kicked his ass when he tried to take advantage of you. And I’m going to have a watch party and eat popcorn while I watch him get choked out by Shark Barbie.”

“Sharkbabe is a nickname I don’t like, but I’ve gotten used to it. Shark Barbie makes me sound like a ditzy blonde,” I said.

“More like Shark Barbarella,” she giggled. I looked at her, not understanding the reference. “You’ll have to look it up.” She pulled a tissue out of her pocket and dried my face. “You have a job to do, Vicki. Go up to the bridge, find your producer, and do it. I’ll see you at breakfast, kid.”

“Thank you.” I walked to the outside stairs leading to the bridge, wondering what kind of reception I would get. All conversation stopped as I entered the room, and four sets of eyes were looking at me.

“Vicki, are you all right,” Captain Merrill asked.

“I’m fine,” I said. “Angry, but physically, I’m fine.”

“I’d still like to have Doctor Goodwin check you over when she’s finished treating Brian. Adrenalin can mask injuries, and I need her findings for the report.”

“I’m filing a complaint with the University over the sexual harassment and assault I witnessed,” Theresa said. “If you want to file criminal charges, we’ll be witnesses for you there, too.”

I looked back at the Captain. “What happens to Brian now?”

“He’s confined to quarters while I collect statements. I’ve already called back to Woods Hole; they will send a launch out tomorrow with a replacement crew member. I’ll need your statement as well, tonight, if possible.”

“What about the fight? Am I in trouble for that?” I’d read the policies, and fighting was grounds for removal from the expedition.

“You reacted to a physical assault and ended it. Rather effectively, I hear,” the Captain said. “I’ve not heard anything that would warrant punishment for you, although I still have to complete the investigation.”

Erik looked at me. “We have no issue with your actions. My men were happy you defended yourself before they had to intervene. It’s always better when the victim gives a bully his due.”

I shook my head. “Any chance of keeping this out of the documentary?”

Erik laughed. “Sorry, but no. This footage is better than the sharks today.”

“Wonderful.”

“You’re shaking,” Captain Merill said. “It’s the adrenaline dump wearing off. You should go sit for a while,” he said as he walked me towards the port door. “Go make your statement, either handwritten or emailed. Erik’s team will be back up here when you finish.”

“We’ll take her,” Theresa said.

I let them guide me back to my cabin, and Theresa sat with me as I called my Mom and told her what happened. She was upset the incident occurred but satisfied with how the Captain was handling it. I opened my laptop and typed out an email with my statement; I sent copies to the Captain, Doctor Holliday, Mercedes, and my parents.

The taping tonight was all stuff that might be used in the show to set up the next day’s activities. The film crew ran cameras as we looked at charts and tracking data to pick out the likely locations of other Great White Sharks. I asked a lot of questions, some simple and some more technical. As the host of the show, I represented the viewers, and Doc and the Captain were the experts.

When I finished and went back to the Crew’s Mess, everyone who hadn’t been on the bridge was waiting for me except Brian. I froze, wondering what was going on.

Leonard was the first to speak. “On behalf of the crew, we want you to know we support you and we want you here,” he said.

“The same for us,” Chip said. “What Brian said was mean, and it was wrong. We want you here because the expedition is better with you as part of it.”

“Hell, we love filming you, Vicki,” the lead cameraman said. “You make us look good.”

“Thank you,” I told them all. “I need to sleep, though. It’s going to be a long day tomorrow.” I got hugs and handshakes from everyone as I moved through. I fell into bed exhausted, but sleep didn’t come easily. Brian’s comments stung, and I was going to work twice as hard to show everyone how wrong he was.