December
Stefan hadn't slept well since he left her over a month ago. He was restless, irritable and angry.
No amount of weight lifting could ease the knots in his neck and shoulders. It was only a empty distraction to ease fuel his anger.
He stared out into the city lost in thought vaguely listening to the classical music in the background all alone in his penthouse. Observing the comings and goings of pedestrians moving about their business and the thousands of cars that've passed by, Stefan wondered if anything would be ever entertaining enough to discourage his restless and lonely mood.
Finding Nathan Diam was becoming a tiresome mission after spending weeks searching for his whereabouts. Even the bounty hunters he hired over a month ago couldn't find the bastard.
The man was more of a phantom than a real life person. It was close to impossible to catch the slithering snake. Whenever Stefan caught a whiff of a lead and followed it, he found left over cluesâpictures of Camelia, unknown serial numbers, and maps. The maps revealed no marked points. They tried to decode the numbers and those too led to nothing. The pictures were scanned for fingerprints and collected in a envelope Stefan kept for himself.
After Liam helped him obtain more information it showed Nathan Diam did in fact have a child, a son, that grew up in England with his mother. As Stefan had guessed, Jason managed to elude the police that day at the mall with help from his own people.  The security camera footage he scanned captured everything.
After a while, Stefan stopped searching for the two of them, leaving the work to the bounty hunters and hired even more operatives to continue tracking them down. Neglecting his businesses for so long already was proving quite difficult. He re-established his position as a powerful businessman and retaking control of his companies.
He was officially Stefan Steel again.
He felt no different like he expected. Nothing changed now that he grasped his destiny, his identity, once again. Perhaps, things would never change for him, nothing would be the same.
However, Stefan missed one aspect of being Kent and it was Camelia. It was a constant ache living inside him, her absence. It was especially present when he was alone. He was used to it but sometimes it felt like the loneliness was eating him up.
After he left, he assured himself he was doing the right thing. He wasn't the man for the jobâhis judgment clouded. He was angry with himself for not acting more professional. She'd been nearly kidnapped twice because of his reckless emotions. The anger just beneath the surface bristled the hairs on his neck every time he thought of the what if's.
He felt ashamed leaving her to think the worst of him. His lack of effort allowed her to conclude the worst. If only he never said he would lie all over again. If only he explained his fears, his internal struggle of losing her too. It didn't come to light until he remembered the nightmareâthe vivid, bloody, nightmare of her in his arms dying.
Forever engraved in his brain.
Images of his dead parents smiling faces swam before him. His grandfather's gentle eyes, the skin wrinkling around the corners. In the final moments, staring at Camelia's red rimmed eyes did he finally wake up remembering how misfortune followed him wherever he went. In those last moments, Stefan trembled with the sudden chill that entered his veins. He hid it from her, that terror that shadowed him, ashamed to face the the knowledge that forced him to leave her.
If he had stayed...God, he didn't want even to think what would have happened to her. He'd rather die than have to live through her death like he did his family members. Everything he did was for her own good.
Stefan always believed he was the cause. He was a curse. Everybody he loves dies.
He looked up at the sky turning darker by the minute. In the end, after leaving her, his actions only hurt and disappointed her beyond repair, and saying all the wrong things and over thinking complicated everything.
Are you really protecting her, or are you trying to spare yourself the pain of loss all over again?
The guilt was slowly killing him alive.
She had given him everythingâeverything he had ever wanted and he left her.
Many times Stefan wanted to go back and beg for her forgiveness. He wanted to stay and get to her see reason but Stefan imagined burying his loved ones. He promised himself he was doing the right thing. Every time he thought to go back to her despite his doubts, his courage always faltered remembering the flash of disgust on her face and her words of hate.
She had looked so small, so vulnerable and defiant before he closed the door behind him.
But God, did he miss her. Her smile, her twinkling eyes...her touch.
Framed pictures of Camelia hung in his home. He had a portrait conducted of her from the countless pictures he had of her. His favorite one was the day he was spying on her as she left the campusâcapturing her smile before she entered the private car. The artist captured the sparkle in her eye and the rosy bloom in her cheeks beautifully.
He ached with want and with a love that consumed him. The memory of her sweet giving body that night in her shower, her innocent face flushed with passion and her deep blue eyes filled with sensual bliss, haunted him as the days dragged by.
With a far away expression, his gaze traveled over his apartment feeling out of place, hollow, empty, tormented..miserable.
His fingers itch to call her, desperately wanting to hear her sweet voice. It would mend his sorrows for a temporary amount of time. Would she answer? He doubted she wanted anything to do with him after his betrayal. Knowing she wouldn't appreciate his presence especially after he behaved, he did the only thing he could to respect her wishes and stayed away.
He deserved her contempt, he hated it but he deserved it.
Stefan sighs heavily and turns away ready to go to bed alone. Nothing could make him happy or alive ever again...except for Camelia by his side. Someone finally found him and loved him the way he dreamed ofâwhen he wasn't looking. If he searched through his life recently he noticed Camelia was the only positive energy surrounding him.
Always had been and always will be.
"I have made a mess of my life." He says in a hallow voice to his emptiness of his penthouse, putting his head in his hands.
Forgive me, Camelia, he thought, his eyelids closing and opening, as he laid in his bed. I made a mistake. I should have forced you to believe in me. I should have believed in myself....
Stefan drags his eyes openâeyes that were glazed with suffering and exhaustion. He gazes at her in wonder as she leans over him and presses a kiss to his forehead.
Is this real?
He said nothing, staring at her, watching every expression passing over her features. She appeared content and happy as she adjusted the covers over him.
She leans down and kissed his cheek. He sighed sweetly at her kiss, long and deep. "I love you, Camelia." He said in a drowsy murmur.
It was only a dream.
2 weeks later, mid-December
Stefan was sitting in his office, rubbing a hand over his exhausted face after back to back meetings. It was difficult to concentrate. Camelia was never far from his thoughts. The image of her face never leaving his mind.
What was she doing? How did she feel? He kept asking himself. Did she forget him?
Little did she know, Liam was his main source of information. Wherever he was, whatever he was doing, he followed her every move from afar. Liam was no help when it concerned her feelings. The updates he needed were vague. His only responses were fine, better, it's hard to tell. Stefan was dying for details, tempted to call him.
Did she ever mention him? He was dying to know.
He was desperate enough to know that he spied on her behind the dark windows of his Jeep, while she was on campus grounds that morning. When she looked in his direction and pierced him with her sharp stare, his heart flipped in his chest.
He wondered if she sensed him.
Stefan lets out a disgusted sigh and pushed the papers in his hands aside, feeling a headache coming on to add to his misery. He got out of his office chair and takes a few strides, stretching a bit from the long hours spent at the desk. For half an hour he stood, staring out passed the glass wall view of the city. The park was a short distance from his building and the blooming flowers welcomed the sun, standing out against all the greenery, catching his attention.
As he continues to brood in silence as a brilliant idea comes to him. What if he were to send her flowers as a reminder he still cared, that he was sorry?
She screamed at him to leave her alone.
She screamed, never wanting to see him again.
The revulsion and disgust on her face....
His thoughts are thwarted by the office phone ringing loudly on his desk. Stefan shrugs off his suit jacket, loosened his tie feeling confined and strides to his desk. Line one was flashing. It was his personal assistant. With a frustrated sigh he presses the intercom.
"What is it Ally?"
"Mr. Steel, I need to confirm some meetings and appointments for tomorrow."
Stefan glanced at his watchâsix in the evening. The end of the work day was coming to a close. It was time for his staff to go home to their lovers, wives, families, children....everybody except him.
"Mr. Steel...?"
"What's on the agenda?"Â He asks, rubbing his temples tiredly.
"You have back to back meetings beginning at nine through noon. At one o'clock you have a luncheon with the founder of the children's charity Steel enterprises donates to every year. You were helping them with negotiations with building the new hospital...." She reminds him. "I called the florist and arranged for the dozens of yellow roses to be placed at the late Mr. Steel's grave before you get there at three in the afternoon."
It was a tradition of his at the beginning and end of every month. Stefan visited his grandfather's grave and always made sure to have his grandfather's favorite colored rose present every time.
"Very good. Any messages?" There had always been a little bit of hope that Camelia would somehow reach out to him if not through his cell phone rather his work. It never happened of course, but Stefan couldn't help but ask.
"Selena Giles left you a message again, sir."
He scoffed out loud and shook his head in irritation.
Ever since he'd been back to work, Selena tried reaching out and Stefan avoided her as much as possible. Thankfully, she worked in another part of the city, in his corporate offices, where he wouldn't see her at a regular basis. But it didn't stop her from reaching him through email or calling. Ally was always the one he delegated to respond to her on his behalf.
Stefan didn't want to encourage her especially after leaving things between them hanging for months. As far as everybody knew he was conducting business over seasâ a valid excuse for a lengthy absence from work while he was protecting Camelia.
He was in no mood to speak to her nor see her. Avoiding her and the rest of mankind was his mission nowadays.
"Is that all?"
"Yes, sir. Did you need anything else before I go home, sir?"
"No, that will be all. Thank you."
Stefan settles back in his chair, staring at his office door solemnly. The idea of sending flowers going down the drain.
She's better off without him.
****
"Oh, Stefan." She breathed, her nose against his cheek, sitting next to him on his large empty bed.
Stefan draws her down to kiss him, pulling her atop him, hungry for her comfort, caressing her dark thick, soft hair. It created a veil over their heads, she giggles and squeals wherever he touched her. Stefan captures her laughter with his mouth, hotly over hers, wrapping his arms around her. She ran her hands over his bare chest and shoulders and arms as if she too couldn't believe he was real.
"Camelia." He groaned, closing his eyes. "I need you."
"Then come to me." She whispers, sliding off him.
Stefan, wakes up with a sudden jolt. He lifts his body slightly off the bed and roams his gaze all over his dark room. The full white moon the only source of light. He falls back against his pillows and gazes up at the bedroom ceiling tormented by his dream of Camelia. He could have sworn he could smell her fragrance clinging to him.
To his pillow.
On his skin.
He rubs a hand over his face and checks the time on his nightstand, feeling as though a truck ran over him. 4:00 am.  Reaching towards the table he snatches the velvet box he purchased next to the red drying rose he pulled from Camelia's birthday bouquet and placed the little box over his chest.
On his heart.
January
Stefan stood in place, his chest heaving. He raked his hand through his hair, noticing it shook slightly with fury. Shaken, and disappointed in himself, he walked over to the liquor cabinet and poured himself a small glass of whiskey. He tossed it back and felt it burn a fiery path down his throat and settle like burning acid in his stomach.
She was to be married. Married.
Picturing Camelia in another man's arms made him feel sick to his stomach. That sweet smile, her laughter was to belong to another. Imagining another man's hands on her body, making sweet love to her.
Did she allow him to touch her as he did?
He closed his eyes and hung his head, loathing himself.
She was supposed to be his wife.
The ring he purchased a month ago. The engagement ring he bought for her. Hidden in his pocket wherever he went. Waiting eagerly to grace Camelia's beautiful finger one day. It now lay on his desk open in the box it lay comfortably cushioned in velvet. It sparkled happily, winking back in his face.
He didn't know why he bought it to begin with but he did. Perhaps, it was to give him hope she would one day be his. Perhaps, it was a way for him to draw on the courage to see her again and ask her to be his wife.
"No!" He roared, slamming his fist down on the desk. Stefan closed his eyes, his temples pounding.
Rage locked in his throat, throwing his drink across the room and watching the glass shatter into a million pieces. With a sudden, strangled growl of pain, he struck out, sweeping all the contents off his desk. The computer, phone and other valuables along with the ring went crashing to the floor.
She'd forgotten him....
The next day
Stefan barely acknowledged his employees who called out greeting to him. All these people who depended on him for a job when he couldn't even protect Camelia adequately. He could barely think. He was too furious.
"Ally, get Liam on the line." Stefan snaps as he walks passed his bewildered secretary to his office that morning, in a rush of determination.
"Yes, sir. Right away, sir." She replies to his back, her eyebrows shooting up in surprise. Ally's back straightens, startled by the door slamming shut behind her angry and irritable boss.
Stefan lays his briefcase on the table, reaches for his pocket and takes out the ring and sets it on his desk. When his fury calmed into a slow-burning anger, it left him with despair.
He had failed.
With a depressed sigh, Stefan began reading over some reports when his office phone buzzes five minutes later.
"Liam is on line one."
"Good. Put him through...and Ally," his stomach growled reminding him he had forgotten to eat again. Considering what he learned, the thought of any food was slightly unappetizing, but he needed to focus, "I want a double espresso and something to eat."
"Yes, Mr. Steel."
Stefan picks up the phone. "Liam? I need a detailed background check."
Some time later, Stefan holds the file in his hands and opened the contents and started scanning the information he requested.
Name: Kivanç Taitliung.
Date of birth: October 27, 1983 (age 33)
Height: 1.87 m (6ft 2in)
Born: Istanbul, Turkey
Social security No: Temporary work visa
Mobile No: (XXX)XXX-XXXX
Bank: Bank Mellat, JPMorgan Chase Bank, Bank of America
Employment: Taitlung Prouduction Inc. Producer, Actor, model.
Education: Istanbul Kultur University
Political Afflictions: None Found
Religious Affiliations: None Found
Sexual Orientation: None Found
In depth Background notes:
â¢Both parents were still alive. He had a younger sister who married in 2010.
â¢Kivanç hosted some pageants and shows. Directed several films. Starred in one of the shows he's produced. He's modeled winning Best Model of the World in 2002. Istanbul news verified several girlfriends he had in the pastânone of which were serious.
â¢He's a proud owner of several racing cars. Previous tickets for speeding were apart of the file. â¢Never was arrested.
â¢No criminal charges.
â¢Traveled to California several times throughout the year on a temporary visa. Visited New York, Florida, and Chicago in the past years.
After several more minutes of going over the hefty contents, the background check produced nothing.
Nothing.
Stefan hoped to find something incriminating against the man who was to marry the love of his life. Sooner or later, he knew he was going to have to go crawling back to her and he wanted meaningful evidence why he was the better pick when that time came. He flipped the file shut and let it fall on his desk with a light thud, running a hand through his thick hair.
Suddenly unable to sit still, he stood with arms folded over his chest, lifting a fist to his mouth, brooding and motionless at the window. His heart was full of foreboding. The flow of rage gusted through him while contemplating how he let Camelia fall into the arms of another.
He failed. Again.
Damn.
With sudden urgency he paced, the rage inside him coming back in full force. His gaze locks on the large framed mirror against the wall and he stares at his blood shot eyes. The man staring back burned with fury.
Without a second thought he punches his reflection. He breathes heavily noticing the blood smeared in the middle of the damaged mirror, his face a disoriented mess reflecting in the broken glass. Stefan lifts his arm, his eyebrows drawn together in a frown watching the blood trickle from his cracked and bleeding knuckles.
Pain radiated from his fingers and arm.
He looks up at the broken mirror. "I have to see her again."
March
Sighing as he scanned the many people in the lobby, keeping his eyes and ears open for the barest whisper of any sort of threat.
What an idiot you are, he told himself lifting the scotch from the table to his lips and swallowing the rest. He had done his best to continue without her and respect her wishesâher decision.
Stefan sat back slowly in his chair and skimmed his jawline with his knuckles staring at the small slim vase placed on the center of the table holding a single red rose. He plucks it, mindless of the drops of water making a small puddle on the table and lifts it to his nose and closes his eyes inhaling the beautiful essence. It reminded him of her.
His lady in red.
His Camelia.
The one woman that has something others will never have, his heart.
The hairs on his nape bristled. Tensed with anticipation, he lowers the rose to the table beside his drink and scans the lobby.
Stefan watched the front entrance as the ladies enter and quickly lifts the newspaper he was supposed to be hiding behind, his eyes peeking from above.
It seemed the whole lobby went silent, watching the group of fancy women intently. He paused, staring at her from a distance, his heart leaping in his chest. It was none other than the girl who consumed his thoughts day and night. He leaned forward and began to smile for the first time in months.
Stefan watched her hungrily, lowering the paper, his elbows resting on the table. One glance, and he wanted her just as urgently as he had the first time he saw her. It had been months since he'd felt any sense of hope. It had been too long since he'd felt any sort of serenity and peace. His disparaging feelings never subsided and now that he got her in his sight, it only heightened and intensified his hunger for her as if somebody electrocuted him.
He stared not being able to help himself, amazed by her transformation.
So beautiful. So incredibly beautiful.
Her slender frame was in disguise. She looked like a ginger cat wearing a long red haired wig, fur coat, high heels and a small dress that hugged her figure perfectly. When Stefan's gaze flickered back up to her face he witnessed how uncomfortable she looked behind the shades veiling her eyes. Her eyebrows were furrowed and she kept glancing around her uneasily.
She was nervous.
Her ridiculous looking friend led the way, his wig bouncing with every step he took. Stefan grinds his teeth and shook his head irritably while Sammy practically dragged Camelia behind him when she looked ready to bolt.
At the moment, he felt prepared to slay dragons for her. Especially that little dragon of a man she calls a friend. But she was pouting and not at all angry from what he witnessed. Sammy gestured dramatically and all Camelia did was stare at him in what appeared to be stunned silence.
Stefan wonders what he was saying to her.
A movement in his periphery vision catches his attention and Stefan shifts slightly. Behind the group of ladies, Liam signals him with a nod. In return he tips the edge of his hat, scanning his surroundings just before his eyes latched back on Camelia now patiently waiting for Sammy to finish checking them in for her bachelorette party.
The wedding was in a week.
If he was ever granted three things for as long as he lived, he would only want to see her, to touch her and to kiss her everyday. Nothing else mattered. Not his health, not his wealthânothing but her. Seeing her face, Stefan felt alive feeling the hope blossoming inside him again for the fist time in months.
Moments passed, and Stefan didn't move, barely breathing. He had been so wrapped up in the raging misfortune and torturing himself. He shocked himself by realizing he should have been grateful for what he had.
Camelia.
He had been given a gift, the gift of her unconditional love. Camelia was alive. She was more miracle than he deserved and even if there was a curse, their love was strong enough to break through it.
He needed her. He missed her. He craved her. With a desperation that bordered on insanity. The urgency running through his body was so powerful he wanted to rip his skin off.
"I'm not strong enough to watch her be loved by someone else."Â He murmurs, his stare boring into her back.
He couldn't shake the way she makes him feel even when she is not near him. She was the door to his futureâa future he was desperately seeking, a future he was holding himself back from due to his insecurities.
He was determined to overcome his weaknesses. Her smile alone had the power to chase his fears.
Stefan was fed up with waiting. He was sick of playing the man who stood on the side like a gentleman allowing her to choose the course of her life. He was disgusted by the curse he believed plagued him.
He stared at the red rose on the table, realizing too late, that her asking him to leave that fateful night had been her effort to reach out to himâasking him to stay. She had held out the olive branch and he set fire to it. The thought moved quietly through his brain.
He couldn't lose her again.
I need a plan to win her back. He thought. I have to get her back.
But what if she doesn't want you back?  She agreed to marry another manâscheduled to marry him in a week and in love with him no less. His conscious interjects trying to sway him. His eyes were seeing the reality and his brain was stating obvious facts.
No one is going to love her as much as I do, not even her so called fiancé. She's my first thought when I wake up and the last before I sleep...and everything in between. She has no idea the amount of happiness she brought into my life and it's my damn fault for not telling her.
To hell with being honorable. To hell with respecting her choice.
Even if he had to force her to love him all over again, he was going to do it.  She must forgive him. He couldn't stand to live without her any longer. He wasted too much time already.
"She won't have a choice." He mutters to himself, his fists hitting the table with a heavy thud.
He was getting her back whether she wants him or not.
When she's back in my arms, my one promise to her is to treat her like the queen she is and make her forget the months of torture when we were apart.
All he needed to do was plan it perfectly.
Time was of the essence.
"I'm taking back what's mine."
____________________________________________________________
It was a rather disappointing turn out.
From the approximately 2,000-3,000 average readers (per chapter), the ones that went back to vote could be counted on my fingers, literallyâand you can trust me on that. I'm very precise on checking and counting all notifications.
This is not including the new readers that started this story in the last week and have voted periodically until they reached the last chapter which were about 30 or so.
However, The last chapter did receive more votes than my others. More felt and decided it deserved a vote only because I added a bribe.
For those of you, which looks like 85%, don't know how or what voting is, allow me to clarify.
Voting shows the writer, storyteller, author (whatever you want to call them). That you liked it, loved it, enjoyed it, or thought the update was fairly good. It's a little expression of a 'thank you' and appreciation for taking the time and sharing their work.
It's the little star that's usually at the bottom of your screen. All you have to do is click or tap and the star will turn orange.
That means you voted.
I take time out of my schedule, my personal life, that's extremely busy by the way, to write and give you a piece of my vivid imagination.
And if you didn't know, it's hard as hell.
It doesn't come easy to me like it may come to others here on Wattpad. My brain is fried after writing a almost 5,000 word update. That's how long the chapters have been lately. And it's double the amount compared to other writers.
But....
I have regulars that constantly vote and comment and you guys are awesome. Your generosity reflects your personality. You don't even know the smile you place on my face. You don't realize the push it gives me to give you more. Your positivity is inspiring and reflects greatly on me. You make me want to write and update faster.
Seriously.
So, thank you from my whole heart for making feel appreciated.
No hard feelings to the silent readers. I'm not upset only very, very surprised.  I just expected the same loyalty back when I shouldn't have.
Regular updates will continue every week until this is finished. Expect even more drama than past chapters and more twists and turns you'd never expect.
I hope Stefan's point of view was worth the wait.
Thanks again,
Shaz