Mason
She fell asleep across my chest, this strange, beautiful creature that I knew I didnât deserve, that I hadnât even wanted, but would die to keep, to protect.
My gut clenched as my heart sank.
What if?
Thatâs all I had.
What if?
I couldnât.
I wouldnât go through it again.
Losing anyone in my life that meant the world, meant my existence, and in such a short time, everything pointed to her, to her essence, to the make of who she was, and I couldnât separate the fact that I needed to be Alpha, needed to be Wolf King in order to unite us with the fact that I had to do it with her by my side.
My only weakness.
Vulnerability.
My greatest and most valuable risk.
Her lips were red then, like sheâd just chewed her lower lip, thinking of the way Iâd done the same a few minutes before, and I selfishly wondered if she thought of me, of the way I tasted her, of the way I spread her legs wide and licked her core like she was my own personal meal.
Of the way I pierced her skin.
The blood trickling into my mouth.
The way I owned her.
Marked her.
I gripped her hips again as she moaned and knew I would never linger when it came to claiming her, to wanting her, because she was in my blood, my soul. I just had to know she would be safe.
She had to be safe.
Every single old fear Iâd ever harbored floated to the surface in a wave of anxiety that crushed my spirit, my soul.
I kissed her brow and quietly got up and went downstairs to think.
I had to be away from her because with her, all I saw was her.
By the time I made it into the living room I knew my thoughts were not private, that Cassius knew my fear.
He was sitting by the fire looking like he had a lot on his mind, on his soul, the way mine was heavy.
âYouâre up late.â I took a seat.
Without flinching, he said, âI donât sleep much anymore.â His eyes were grave as he looked at me and then back at the fire. âFear is not welcome here.â
I hung my head. âI havenât known true fear until this moment in time.â
âFear will only breed hate,â he said gravely.
âHate?â I paced in front of him. âI donât understand.â
He stood, and his eyes flashed white before he said quickly, âNot now you donât, but you will.â
He disappeared in a flash of light, and I was left in front of the crackling fireplace wondering if everything would ever feel safe again.
If anything would feel normal.
Or if I was cursed to feel the weight of the universe on my shoulders right along with its secrets.
I never understood the sheer horror at knowing the secrets around me, the way the earth moaned and ached for the angels to return home almost as much as they themselves ached.
My chest was in a constant state of pain, and I now knew why.
It was the same aching pain the Watchers felt on a daily basis.
Passed down to me.
It wasnât just physical pain.
I knew what that felt like.
No, this was emotional turmoil that wouldnât go away; it was the deepest separation Iâd ever experienced. It only faded away when I was with Serenity, when I was united with love.
When I feared, it pierced my heart.
I looked into the flames as dawning realization shook me to my core. The Watchers were not tempted to do evil in order to regain the attention of The Creator. No, it was much worse than that.
Theyâd been walking around for millennia with a broken heart.
The thought haunted me as I took a seat, and when Serenity joined me hours later, laying her head against my chest, and peppered kisses down my skin, when I felt peace in her arms, I knew.
The war wasnât over.
It had only just begun.