Ruhi:
I was running late for my class with Ekansh. Saniya was hurling behind me to match my speed. I bid a quick farewell to her before she walked inside her mentor's cabin.
I knocked on Ekansh's cabin. When I didn't get a response, I pushed it a little and found it empty.
I decided to wait in his cabin. 10 minutes passed but he didn't come. He didn't text me saying he couldn't take the class today.
I stepped out and instantly bumped into Saniya. I got suspicious of her behaviour. What is she doing near his door? I crossed my arms and raised my brow.
She lowered her head. "I was trying to eavesdrop on what you both speak?"
I laughed, shaking my head. She got too curious to know more about Ekansh and me. "And unfortunately, he isn't in the cabin today."
She huffed, "Even my mentor got some emergency, so she couldn't take the class."
"Oh! Do you have any plan then?"
"No plans, I will head to my room." Then she glanced at me and asked, "How will you go home?"
I bit my lip and muttered, "Ekansh will drive us home."
"uff! Girl. I wish you both to get back together," She expressed genuine concern. "Dormitory buildings are beside the Library. Let me accompany you."
.
.
I waited for Ekansh behind the library. When he didn't show up after 15 minutes, I decided to take a cab back home. I told myself I wouldn't speak to him until he explained where he had been. Once again, he made me feel worthless.
As my hand hadn't recovered fully, I had to use Gurpreet's help to change my clothes. Just then, I learned from that "Ekansh pra had arrived long back, parjai. And he is taking rest in his room."
I sighed. So, he is back to ignoring me. I wet my lips and took out my books. I don't want to give up on him but he only cares about Anthra. What if, I end up hurting myself deeply?
I studied trying to ignore the tears threatening my eyes. This wedding is draining my energy. However, I concentrated on my books until I received a knock on my door by Gurpreet. It was 9 in the night and she came to call me for dinner. Before strolling towards the steps, I glanced at his door. It was close.
I already guessed him to be with Anthra, as he had to miss his last night's date because of me.
While I positioned myself on the chair, Uncle Manish was making a plate, when I inquired about it, he responded, "For Ekansh beta!" I was surprised to know that he was still at home.
I was about to take the first spoon of rice when Uncle Manish returned with the food tray, which hadn't been touched. "What happened?"
"he said, he is not feeling hungry."
"Hmm...parjai," Gurpreet piped in, "I think he is sick. When he came this evening, he was mumbling something and was about to trip from the stairs too."
I pressed my lips and gave a thought: What could have happened?
After I was done with my dinner, I proceeded to his room with the dinner plate.
Surprisingly, his door was unlocked, but it was dark. As I neared the steps to his bed, I found him half nude on the bed. His eyes were wide open and he was staring at the ceiling.
What's wrong with him?
"Ekansh!" I sounded soft. His head tilted towards me.
"Aap yahan?"
"You, here?" he asked, staring at me. Something was different in his voice.
"I brought you dinner," I replied, forwarding the food tray.
He laughed and climbed down the bed. While he approached me he stumbled a couple of times and stood in front of me.
"You care about me. Why?"
"Because I am your wife, Ekansh," I answered. He took the plate and placed it on a nearby desk. Grabbing my hands in his, "Then come and take care of your husband." He made me sit on his bed and then slept by resting his head on my lap. His actions off guarded me, but I didn't push him and left him to rest.
"Ekansh, did you drink?" I asked. He took my hand and placed it on his head.
"Yes. A little... Almost a bottle."
While massaging his hair, I asked, "Why?"
"Because I feel like I don't have my life."
"No, Ekansh, don't say that. In two years, you will finish your super specialisation and will become a neurologist. You will have everything you want. And..." I bite my lip before conveying, "...your girlfriend. To whom you love."
He sat up and leaned towards me. I crinkled my nose because of the sour smell of alcohol coming from his breath.
"That's what Ruhi, no one knew what I wanted. No one is asking, what I want. They are just making the decisions on behalf of me."
I cupped his cheeks, his subtle pricked my palms, "What do you want, Ekansh?"
He leaned forward and rested his forehead against mine. "I. Want... You!" His response did nothing but warm my heart. And before I knew a tear rolled over my cheek.
But I decided not to believe him and dismissed him. "You are drunk, Ekansh. Or else you wouldn't have said it."
Shaking my head, I climbed down his bed and remembered that he left me alone today, without informing me. "Eat and sleep!" But he caught my injured hand's wrist.
"Ahh!" I cried with pain
"I am sorry," he withdrew his hand. "I am a bad husband. I always hurt you, Ruhi." He sounded broken and hurt.
My heart didn't let me step out of the room, so, I took the plate and sat on the bed beside him. I fed him food with a spoon, and he silently ate it, smiling like a loon for every bite. After I was done, I stood up and announced, "Now sleep, I will go."
"No. Sleep with me!" I demanded
"But..."
"Please. Like how we slept last night, the same way."
"Okay!" I took the plate out and called for Gurpreet to take the plate away.
I turned off the bed lamp and settled on the bed beside him. We didn't place any pillows between us but we had enough space to keep us apart from each other.
But slowly and very slowly he started to shift from his position and slept only a few inches away from me. I ignored him and slept still by facing my back at him. Apart from that. I tried to control my heart cause it was on the verge of exploding because of our proximity.
"Can I tell you something?" He whispered in my ear, sending multiple chills along my spine.
I hummed.
"When you were drunk in Ludhiana..." he whispered, against my ear, "you asked me to touch you." My eyes widened. But I shut them immediately feeling stupid for my actions.
Tracing his lips on the ridge of my ear. "Do you remember it?" He probed, kissing my ear lobe. I shivered with the wetness he left on my ear.
"No!" I mumbled.
He chuckled and articulated. "Can I touch you now?... Over there!"
What?
"Ji Nahi." I barked with fright. (No!)
"Teek hai ji!" He said and lay down. (Okay!)
As he lay down on his side and wasn't moving, I thought he had drifted to sleep but I was wrong.
"Aap ne Hume kiss ke liye bhi pucha tha."(You even asked me to kiss you?) He spoke again. "Can I kiss you now?"
Oh god! Drunk Ekansh is so notorious. Why did I agree to sleep with him?
"Ji Nahi!" (No)
"Teek hai ji!" (Okay)
After a few minutes, he spoke again, "Hum nahi lekin ap toh Hume kiss kar sakthi ho na?"
(Why don't you kiss me?)
I closed my eyes and huffed. I should have interpreted his intentions before agreeing to sleep with him.
"Nahi, Ekansh. Sleep!" I demanded.
"Kya aap thoda sa peck bhi nahi kar sakthi." (What about a peck?)
"No!"
"Just lip to lip touch."
"No!"
"Just a lip touch on either of my lips."
"No!"
"Just a lip touch on the right corner of my lips."
"No!"
"Just a lip touch on..."
"Ekansh," I spun and stared at him. His head was slightly higher than mine. "Sleep or else, I will hit your head with that bed lamp."
Taking me off guard, he loomed over me, grabbed my hand and placed my index on his lips. "Only two seconds kiss here," it did sound like a demand but to me, it was like a spell of enchantment. And without wasting another second to think, I agreed.
"Only two seconds. Okay!"
"Good. Now I will sleep, you will come and kiss me. Okay." He informed me and slept beside me by closing his eyes.
"Is it one of your fantasies?" I pried.
"Yes. But only with my wife." It sent a strong bliss in my heart. I am scared of trusting his words but even confused.
However, I gave up and loomed over him. Taking slow and shallow breaths, I closed the distance between our lips. "Only two seconds," I mentioned. He hummed. And I placed my lips on his.
But he cheated on me. As soon as I placed my lips on his, he meandered his arm on my back and whirled us around. And then he deepened the kiss by forcibly claiming access to my mouth through his tongue.
He tasted and even smelled full of alcohol but those things didn't matter to me and I found myself giving up by moving my lips in sync with him.
After what felt like two minutes and more but not two seconds, he pulled away. We were breathless and stared into each other's eyes as if there wasn't a day after that night. But I missed his touch on my lips.
As if he heard my silent wish, he placed his lips once again on my lips and kissed me again with compassion. After he got contentment with our kiss, he left my lips.
"Ruhi!" He called softly, I opened my eyes and stared into his eyes. His eyes revealed satisfaction in them. He leaned forward and rested his face on the curve of my neck. "Good night, Ruhi jaan!" He whispered, eventually pecking at that spot. I exhaled a sigh. When I didn't perceive a movement in his body, I tried to shift him. But he was too heavy to even budge.
I gave up and let him sleep the way he wished.
When I woke up this morning, I didn't find him above me but near my belly. He slept by hugging my stomach tight.
Patha nahi yeh kitne din ki Kushi hai...lekin bhut pyari hai.
I have no idea how long this happiness is going to stay in my life... But I find it so beautiful.
"Ekansh!' I tried to wake him up and his response revealed that he was already awake.
"Kahiye Jaan."Â Jaan! Is he still drunk to call me that?
"Move, I need to get ready."
"No!" He hugged my belly and now slept above my belly. And guess what, my belly was turning cold as if we were in a refrigerator. If we stay in this position for another minute, I am sure that I will die because of this feeling. So, I did what I thought was acceptable.
"Ekansh, we will get late." I grabbed him by his ears and thrust him. His head fell on the mattress.
"Ouch! I am hurt." He opened his eyes and began to rub his head.
Uff! His overacting.
But I took advantage of the situation and immediately climbed down from the bed and ran to the door.
"Your head hit the mattress not with the rock. So, stop overacting and go freshen up."
"Ruhi, aap bhut bhut buri ho." He said before climbing down the bed.
Something has gotten into him that he changed suddenly with me. But why didn't he contact me if he couldn't take my class or drive me home, the other night?
Maybe he had some emergency that he couldn't even text me.
Yes, that could be the expected probability. I shouldn't assume him to be with Anthra always. And after last night's moments, my decision to not leave him has strengthened.
After I got dressed, I took my bag and moved to the dining table. While going through the newspaper I slipped my chai. I even have the habit of sharing the news with my dadu.
He saw my texts and called me. "Dadu!" I said with ecstasy. Dadu is the bank of my happiness. His voice is like recharging to my soul.
"Ladoo Rani. Kaisi hai aap abhi?"
"I am excellent, Dadu." And when I saw Ekansh, I added, "Ekansh is taking care of me so well."
He smiled at me and sat opposite me. Gurpreet served us breakfast. I spoke with him while I consumed my breakfast.
After breakfast, Ekansh drove us to the campus. He stopped the car behind the library. As we had time, we sat for a few minutes in the car.
"Where were you, last evening?"
"I... Was with her."
I lowered my gaze. "Oh!" I exclaimed. More than hurt, I felt enraged with him. What he did with me last night felt like he was just taking advantage of me. I grabbed my bag from the back seat and enunciated, "Today, I will take a cab, okay?" I stepped out and made my way towards the front.
He was with her. I am not less than stupid.
"Ruhi!" He came behind me.
I whirled and inquired, "Boliye?"
"Can we go out for dinner?"
"Why?"
He smiled, "to eat, obviously." I stared at him and shook my head.
"I have to study. I can't. I am sorry." However, he will be busy with her so why he is doing this formality?
Smiling still, "Exactly, at 8 in the night. I will knock on your door."
I crossed my arms below my chest and uttered, "I don't trust you. Cause you will end up spending your time with others."
He laughed, grabbing me by my arm, he pulled me towards him, "Are you jealous, Ruhi Razdan."Â That name itself determines that I belong to him.
"Of course. Not. I don't give a shit about anyone." I spoke with attitude.
leaning against my ear, he whispered, "Aap pe do cheeze bhut jasthi hai...pehle toh aapke nakh pe ka gussa. Aur dusra safed rang..." he smirked and I glared at him, "humne aapko dekh liya tha us rath, Jaan."
"Two things suit best on you. One, the angry look on your face and second white colour... I saw you that night, Love!"
"Kis rath?" (Which night?) My brows moved in with confusion.
"Recall once when you wore the white thing in this week?" He inquired but left my hand and took a few steps back.
As soon as it hit me that I wore a white lace bra, the other night, my eyes widened in shock.
*****
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