Ruhi:
"Wow, this saree is so beautiful," Saniya exclaimed as she ran her hands over the light blue silk fabric.
This was the first time the five of us had gone out to dinner together since I joined the college. It was Saniya's birthday, and Rayan had planned a surprise for her, but he asked us to keep it a secret. For a moment, we all wondered: he might have feelings for her. I even noticed them talking and spending time alone in the library. Just this morning, I found out that Saniya is Rayan's cousin and they are neighbors. Since it's common in their culture to marry within the family, my suspicions were somewhat justified.
Additionally, he gave her a beautiful pendant that one would typically expect from a boyfriend or husband. I chose to gift her a saree because she had expressed a desire to own one after seeing a picture of my rose gold saree, which I wore to Harshit Pra and Mahi Bhabhi's place.
Meanwhile, I told them about my Karwa Chauth experience and Ekansh's surprise fasting.
"He is so romantic," when my eyes landed on Rayan, I saw him roll his eyes.
"Seems like he is in love with you," Manoj shared.
"But what about Dr Anthra, did he break with her?" This came from Rayan. And it drained the color from my face.
"Hey. You don't have to mess up her happiness," Saniya scolded him.
"I do care about her. But I don't want her to get fooled by completely trusting him."
I fell into a deep silence and so did others. But today is Saniya's birthday. So, I ignored everything and concentrated only on her. After dinner, Rayan drove Saniya to her dormitory building. I doubted her stay in the dorms when her parents lived in the same city.
Ekansh had night duty that night, so, I drove my car to uni that night. I bought takeaway for Gurpreet and Manish Uncle too. But my insecurity regarding Ekansh took birth the first time, since our wedding. It's been three days since we returned to Delhi and started to share the room. We even bought a big wardrobe so that we could afford both of our dresses.
It was 9 in the night when I got distressed with random thoughts haunting my brain. Thoughts like Ekansh spending the night with Anthra. I stared at the bed lamp as tears started to flow out of my eyes.
No. He can't cheat on me.
But he hadn't made our wedding official.
What if, Rayan's words are true? Maybe he is keeping a relationship with the two of us.
Then I thought of them cuddling on the bed and laughing at me: how easily He made my fool.
I felt pain in my lower abdomen. I squeezed my belly as I cried loudly. My mom's face of sobbing for my father appeared in front of me. My life is not different from hers.
Maybe Ekansh and Anthra are having sex at this very moment.
I screamed out of the pain. I wanted to climb down but the pain didn't let me.
It was 11 when I received a call from Ekansh. I didn't answer it.
What if he called to declare that we are over?
No. I am not gonna attend it. I can't imagine my life without him.
After a few minutes, I heard the voice of footsteps approaching the bed. "Ruhi!" I heard a familiar voice. "Did you sleep?" I didn't say a word.
"Ok. I bought ice creamâ" out of the blue, a sob escaped from my mouth, which cut him off. "-Ruhi!" He voiced now worried. "Ruhi." He sat beside me. "Why are you crying? Did anything happen?" he asked cherishing my back. "Ruhi?"
Ekansh:
"Leave me alone!" she yelled. Her voice was hoarse.
After a few seconds, I inquired, "Did I do something?'
"I want to be alone." I want to respect her privacy but watching her emotionally break down, I didn't feel like leaving.
I took the pillow and a comforter from the wardrobe and silently walked to the balcony.
Once she felt that I was away from her, she cried loudly. It was hurting me to see her in that condition of which I have no clue.
I couldn't control it anymore and approached her. She was shocked to see me. And then she screamed, "I told you to leave me alone."
Ruhi never behaved in this way with me. Neither did she show any anger toward me. Then why today?
"Just tell me, what did I do?"
She shook her head, "Waheguru ji has gifted me the life I was scared of." Tears flew out of her eyes. "You will leave me one day, like my parents." Her words revealed her insecurities and even her fear. "It's scaring me that I will go through the same life as my mom's."
I pulled her in a hug. Did she have any nightmares?
She resisted my hug but I didn't let her go. She has no idea, how sick I felt to see her crying.
"Meri jaan, bas karo ab!" I hushed her but her sobs continued. "I am here, for you!"Nonetheless, I assured her.
After a long moment, she mumbled, "Can you take me to the bathroom?"
I pulled away and lifted her in bridal style. My eyes fell on the stains of blood on the light pink bedsheet. She is bleeding.
I let her stand on the floor then I walked to the door. "I will stand out. Call me, if you need anything or when you are done?"
She nodded her head. But her eyes were sore and red.
Thankfully, I decided to come under the pretext of giving her ice cream, or else, I wouldn't have visited her breakdown. Does she have this often?
Meanwhile, I removed the sheaths and replaced them with fresh ones. They were purple with a floral print. I sneered as I ran my hands on the fabric. Just in three days, she changed my room completely into a garden.
I heard the muffles of running tap water from the bathroom. Apprehending her to finish her business, I approached the door and stood out.
She pulled open the door and without paying any attention to me, she started to walk back to bed. I followed her steps. She climbed up and lay down on her side. "You can sleep, on your side," She mumbled with closed eyes. I brought the pillow and comforter from the balcony and lay down on the bed.
Her back was facing me and my eyes were boring holes in her back. I wanted to pull her to my chest and sleep.
After a decade of silence, "You said you brought ice cream for me..." came her Magical voice. I felt like finally my life was blessed with a rain of happiness.
"Do you want to have it now?"
"Yes." She whispered, still her back facing me.
I jumped down the bed and ran to the kitchen. I grabbed the two ice cream cups with two spoons and moved back to the room.
Now I found her to sit by resting her back against the headboard. I handed her her cup along with a spoon. I sat beside her and had my ice cream.
"You went to the same palace?" She inquired tasting her ice cream while a small smile formed on her lips.
"Yes."
"How was your night duty?" She inquired now showing her interest in the conversation.
"It was fine. There was a PG too, so I thought of visiting you. If there is any emergency I will go back to the hospital."
"This is not fair. Poor PG's."
"It's ok, Ruhi. I had night shifts twice a week. And no senior doc showed mercy on me," I informed, "Which clinical posting you will have after GM?"
"Saniya has the schedule, she hadn't shared it yet... But she said either obstetrics or GS."
Obstetrics reminded me of Anthra. In these three days, I was finding ways to break with her. Harshit said that he would help me with that.
"And what about your thesis..." She inquired, raising her brow.
"I still have a year to finish but I am trying to do it soon," I answered her.
"That's great. You can seek my help."
I smiled at her attitude, "Ok. I will. By the way, if you want you can stay at home, I have a day off too, tomorrow."
She shook her head, "what will I do?"
"You got periods, and I assume you are suffering from muscle cramps too?" I inquired. She nodded her head. "You can take a rest. Then we will go shopping."
"Shopping?"
"Yes, after two days, it's our Superintendent's 25th wedding anniversary. We got an invitation," I addressed her.
A small smile played on her cute lips, "we?"
"Yes. It's time, I make our wedding official in front of everyone." I announced. I thought she would smile but she stopped eating and stared at her half-empty cup.
"What if they all call me by names? What if they laugh at you? What if they find me not as beautiful asâ"
"Ruhi!" I cut her off. I dunno what's going on in her mind along with insecurities. But I don't want her to compare herself with Anthra or any other female. No one has the qualities to even stand beside her well, comparing is a huge thing.
I put my ice cream cup aside and so did hers. Then taking hold of her hands, I said, "You don't need to worry about anything. Aap ke samne toh Pari bhi phiki pad jayegi toh yeh duniya ke ladkiyon ka toh koi mol hi nahi hai."(Even the Angel will pale in front of you, so the girls of this world have no value at all.)
Nodding her head, she cutely mumbled, "Our icecreams are melting." I chuckled and leaned forward to peck her nose tip. After we resumed eating our ice cream, she asked me to give her a painkiller. I handed her one.
"Are you gonna leave?" She asked when I covered her with the comforter.
"No. Unless I get an emergency call." I said and lay down beside her.
We slept in the same way, as we used to when she was a toddler. Her head rested on my arm and my other hand cherished her hair until she fell into a sleep.
"About party?"Â She started and I hummed, "Does it have a theme?"
"Cocktail. I heard my colleagues discussing that females wear evening gowns in these types of parties."
She giggled. "Were you eavesdropping?"
I laughed, nodding my head. "I didn't know much and I announced to everyone that I would bring my wife, so, I asked them what should females wear at this party and all. In response, they said evening gown. But I heard them saying deep necks, long slit gowns and all."
"Aap na, Ekansh. Bhut pyare ho."(You are so adorable, Ekansh!")
"Apse 99% kaam hi." (But 99% less than you) She closed her eyes, while I continued cherishing her hair. I pecked on her forehead.
"I will go to college but pick me up, early tomorrow. We will go to shop," she informed in her lazy voice.
She wasn't sleeping and I waited for a long moment cherishing her hair. When I found her to enjoy my massage I thought of asking the reason behind her sobbing. "Ruhi. Why did you cry?"
She opened her eyes but lowered her lids and constantly stared at my chest. "I feel scared, sometimes. Especially when I get my period. This menstrual pain makes me weak."
"What scares you?" She shook her head as tears started to flow out of her eyes.
"Everything." Her voice now sounded hoarse. "Especially of my life. I don't want to be alone, Ekansh. But I know, I will end up alone."
I cupped her cheeks, solacing her, "You will not be left alone, Ruhi." She pecked softly at the sole of my palm.
"That day. On the second day of our wedding, I read your text messages..." She paused, I wiped her tears.
"What messages?" I probed.
She closed her eyes for a moment before replying, "Anthra inviting you for... Se...sex. You might have married to her but your Suhag Raat will be with me."
She finished and my eyes widened.
"Ruhi!"
"I am sorry, I didn't do that intentionally. Your mobile screen lit up andâ" I pulled her in a hug. Her head pressed against my chest.
"I am sorry too, Ruhi. I am sorry for everything. For my ignorance. For my shitty behavior with you. For me giving importance to another woman. And even to hurt you. But we didn't do anything. I am... Virgin."
Her sobs stopped so I pulled away and stared at her eyes. Nodding my head, "it's true, Ruhi. I didn't get that shameless to go and sleep with another woman after our wedding." I wiped her remaining tears. "I agree, I regretted marrying you. But that was only till the night of our wedding. Because slowly, Meri Jaan... my heart, my brain was thinking only about you. Maybe I spent time with her but you were the only one in my thoughts. The day you left for Ludhiana without informing me, I realized how badly you have affected me and that I can't stay without you. I tried to stay away from you but I hadn't realized, how I was killing myself."
In response, she only spoke one thing, "I am a virgin too. You will be my first" I laughed at her.
"Meri Jaan, apki sharmili adhayein kafi hai yeh bathane ki apke pehle hum hai.."(My love, I can say that easily by the way you blush!)
"Aur Akhri bhi." (And my last too,) She whispered cutely against my lips. "Apki jagah koi nahi le sakte humare Dil mei."(No one can replace you in my heart.) She declared.
I closed my eyes and touched my forehead with hers. "Aur aapne pathar ki diwar se apna Ghar bana liya hai humare Dil mei." (And you made a house with marble walls in my heart.)She laughed which soothed my heart. Eventually, I made her laugh.
****
EHEM, EHEM!!
Before that night arrived, I wanted them to clear out misunderstandings...so this chapter was needed.
p.s. : And I can't leave my book side characters just like that... I am referring to Saniya and Rayan. Though Rayan flirts with Ruhi, he shows a few signs of love towards Saniya, which I described a couple of times in the past chapter. There is a lot to write about them but I kept it short. And they belong to the Muslim religion, if anyone doubted it.
Preview:
"Anthra, when you threw the mang tikka I bought you, I realized that I did the right thing to marry her!" Finally, I announced in front of her and walked away.