Chapter 48: Chapter 48

Chapter 48

RAVEL

(PRESENT TIME)

The more each day passes by, the more I have more reasons to dislike June’s presence. How she found out that I was having dinner at that restaurant I do not know; one minute I was cating alone, and the next minute she was seated across the table. For a moment, I considered having Raymond walk her out, but I wasn’t sure if that ba stard was watching. I do not know who the f ucker is, which is why I have to be extremely careful.

I didn’t see it as a daunting task to have dinner with her, but when Hazel suddenly walked up to us, I regretted not sending her back to the hotel or walking away when she imposed on my

dinner plans.

Unable to do anything meaningful, I decided to take a break from replying to the last-minute mail.

Stepping out of the balcony, I pulled out a pack of cigarettes, grabbed a stick, and lighted the end.

When was the last time I felt this lonely? Probably the last time I slept in Hazel’s arms. Nothing seemed appealing to me, not even the crazy night view, the hot liquid gliding down my throat, or the smoke from the cigarette. Pulling out my phone from my pocket, I clicked on the favorite list on my contact and stared at Hazel’s number, contemplating whether I should call her or not.

My hesitancy resulted from the fear that she wouldn’t want to speak with me after what she experienced at the restaurant tonight. Letting go of every assumption, I dialed her number and placed the phone on my ear, listening to it ring. To my surprise, she answered.

“Mr. Southwark.” She rasped.

Despite the fact that her voice leaves me breathless, I dislike the fact that she refers to me by my last name. Multiple times I have told her to call me by my first name. I’ll give anything to hear her call me Rav, but I’d rather not push my luck. “Please call me Ravel.” I pleaded softly.

She sighed softly. “what do you want? Why are you calling me this late?”

Sh it! I didn’t think of the fact that she might be asleep. “I’m sorry if I disrupted your sleep,” I swear, it was never my intention. I do want to hear her voice desperately, but not at the expense of her comfort.

“I wasn’t asleep.” She assured me. “I was actually talking to Da” She paused abruptly, locking in the rest of her words. “I was busy with unfinished work.”

I bet my a ss that wasn’t what she wanted to say. She was actually busy speaking with David. Is he there with her? Does he share her bed or does she share his?

“Ravel” she breathed out. “are you still there?”

Exhaling smoke, I stared at the cigarette trying to figure out when I started smoking. “yeah,” I breathed out “I’m still here.” How can I fall asleep knowing that she prefers the company of another man?

“Are you going to say something?” she asked tiredly. “At least tell me the reason you called.”

She’s right, F uck that ba stard boyfriend of hers. I am the one she is talking to right now, I shouldn’t be bothered about him. “I called to apologize about tonight.”

She fell silent for a moment. “apologize for what?” the softness in her voice made me wonder if I misread the look in her eyes when she addressed June. “you didn’t do anything wrong Ravel, you were only having dinner with your date.”

“June isn’t my date.” I corrected. “she wasn’t in that restaurant on my invite, more like she crashed my dinner.” And I hate myself for not walking her out or walking myself out. “I truly apologize for her presence.”

She sniffed, followed by shuffling feet and the sound of a door closing. “You do not owe me any explanation, Ravel, even though she wasn’t at the restaurant as your date, she is in Seattle as your date, and it is only normal for her to want to have

dinner with you.”

“Hazel,” I drawled out softly. “I want you to know that June’s presence in Seattle is beyond my control.”

I’ve never been more honest in my life. “If it were up to me, she wouldn’t be here.”

“I think that’s too much information.” She mumbled, trying so hard not to snap at me. “is that the reason you called, I’ll like to go back to what I was doing.”

My jaw clenched. She wants to go back to David. “I am obviously more important than what you were doing or you wouldn’t have picked up the call.” And that is a fact.

“Don’t flatter yourself, Ravel,” she warned with an edge in her voice. “If I were to have my way, I will end this call”

Sh it. That was f ucking mean. Chuckling despite the pain, I tried to feel grateful over the fact that I got to hear her voice. “were you able to have dinner? I noticed you left on time.” Probably because she didn’t feel comfortable being in the same space with me.

“What makes you think I didn’t?”

The fact that you are getting defensive proves you didn’t and it’s all because of me. “I’m sorry.” I apologized yet again, unable to utter any other word.

“And why in heaven’s name are you apologizing again?”

“because that is all I’m capable of saying.” And it pains me to the core. It pains me that I’m not there to cook for her or coax her to have something to eat. “I’m going insane Hazel.’

She remained mute.

“I’m slowly losing my mind and I let it happen because I feel I deserve it.” I was never a smoker, yet here I am on my second stick for the night.

“Ravel?” she whispered. “are you okay? Is something going on?”

A lot is going on and I can’t even share it with you. “I miss you, Hazel.” Chuckling, I rubbed my forehead with the heel of my hand. “I miss you so much that I consider giving it all up.”

“Ravel? What are you talking about?” the concern in her voice gave me a glimmer of hope. “are you alone?” she inquired. “where is Raymond? Is he there with you?”

She is going to be mad if she finds out I’m smoking. I quashed the cigarette into the ashtray. “I don’t share the room with Raymond or anyone if that’s what you are asking.”

“The exhibition,” she asked, “is it stressing you out? Is something going wrong?”

Apart from the fact that you are showing up with that f ucker? “Everything is going on fine.”

“If everything is really fine, why are you sounding like you do right now?”

I just told her that I missed her and she decided to just ignore that fact. “Nothing is wrong.” Maybe that is what she hopes to hear, maybe if I keep saying it repeatedly then everything is going to be indeed fine.

“Ravel,” she called out softly, “I know things might not be smooth with us right now, but you can always talk to me.”

I do not deserve her. “You don’t have to worry, everything.”

“Rav,” she whispered. I bit my lips not to let the tears threatening to drop succeed. I haven’t heard that name in over two years. “what is going on with you.”

The first tears rolled down and I quickly wiped it off, sniffing to keep the others locked in. “Ravel, are you crying?”

I chuckled. “I haven’t heard that pet name in over two years and it kind of got to me.”

She cursed under her breath. “forward me the address of your hotel, I’m coming over.”