Matteo's Pov
5 years later
A lot of things has happened throughout these past five years after she
left me.
Lorentz left Quinn too on the same night. He move to the humans side
and start his own life there without looking back.
Both people we love left us, all because of our selfish act and
unforgiveable mistakes we did in the past.1
Today is the first time I attended a meeting usually Jay and Jona does
on my behalf but an accident happens a year ago which left Quinn
crippled and Jona died.
It was indeed my punishment from the moon goddess. I guess karma
will always follow our way and its how I almost have nothing now.
Its true that I almost lost everything except for my own pack. They
came to understand me and try to support me by standing by my side
without questioning my choices and the absence of a luna.
That is right I never had another luna or anyone I chose to be a luna for
me after Addasah. I was all alone in this world without the love of my
life.
The Alphas from other packs started to come in the conference room.
Eric and Dante wave in my way before sitting on their seat beside their
luna.
They have been good friends to me through out this years. When they
came to know the whole truth they never judge me for it or even cast
away my pack and I from the world of prestigious Alphas and Pack.
They were really understanding and have told me their own
experiences saying that they were not better than me either.
I look up at the room's door and saw Aaron nod in my way once he
enter the room
He came and sat beside me patting me on the back "it's good to have
you back Matteo," he said with a smile.
Yeah and you don't get to forget my cousin and Jay who have help me
through the pain apart from others.
Everyone was here except for one Alpha who says to run in a bit late. I
have heard of this new Alpha and his luna but never I have met him as
this is my first time in a meeting since five years.
I chat with Aaron and other Alphas from other pack. Glad nobody
brought up the death of Jona or having no luna. Suddenly the doors
open and that's when I saw her.
My Mate, my love, my woman, the one I lost 5 years back then. There
was no more bond binding us to one another as our separation kills
those sparks but unbelievably the feelings I have for her was infinity.
My heart, my body, my soul are still tied to her.
Her sapphire eyes lighten the room. The same eyes I use to dream of
every night, the ones I look in to when we made passionate love all
night years ago.
Her black hair now highlights with red hair neatly done in an updo bun
with curly hair loosen down her face.
The hair I wish to touch one more time before I die.
Her face filled with radiant, no longer have any dark shades under those
beautiful eyes.
Every inch of her body and soul I always imprint them in my head and
heart.
One of the announce that meeting is now starting as everyone is here
now, including the luna of the Pack we have been waiting for.
My heart clench hearing that the luna of the last pack is here instead of
the Alpha. My eyes moves from her to two young pups behind her.2
My breath hitch and I felt Aaron's hand patting my shoulder in which I
turn and told him that I'm okay. Yet this is too much for me to see and
witness.
Watching her from across the room was unbearable with two grown up
pups pulling on her skirt calling her "mama."
âHow lucky is the one whom they call their father,â I thought to myself
as I keep staring at her.4
I wish they were mine and she is still mine unfortunately they aren't
anymore. I bet she now belongs to someone else and how lucky is that
person to have her as their mate and luna.3
She usher the two young pups out to their baby sister before taking a
seat and smile around the room. Her eyes glance around until they are
finally on mine.
We look into each others eyes almost forever. It feels like the world has
frozen and there was no one in this room but just the two of us.
My mouth stretch into a smile while at the same time I am trying to be
brave and that's when she gave me the brightest smile that I always
remember.
It was that same smile she gave me when I first officially ask her out as
my girlfriend. She is happy and that all matters to me now.
Seeing her engage freely and smiling from here to there in the room
flutters my heart.
Of course my heart always belongs to her alone even though
everything still hurts. Yet all that matters is that she is happier than ever.
She has moved on and found someone that loves her sincerely,
deserves her better and is good enough for her.
I won't ever compare myself to the one she has chosen and I have no
right to feel jealous or mad. I have standby my words to her and I won't
be any more obstacles in her life.
She deserves that smile and her own happy family after all the pain I
made her go through.
The guilt that has been eating up soul is no longer there in me.
Everything weigh was gone but was replaced with sorrow and regret.
I still remember what she told me years back that I would never know
how she felt of everything then; me choosing her, me loving her, me
having a kid with her.
She may be wrong then because what she felt back then is what I felt
every moments of this life.
Losing her was enough for me to know what it feels like to be unloved,
to be hurt, to be broken, to be upset, to be angry and to regret every
choice I ever made.
This love I have is already a losing game, where I am already lost in this
game of love and mates.