Book I - ch 22. Lies and Other Such Comforts

* * *

Pegasus set his headphones down as he again heard knocking. He opened the door, expecting to find Robyn. “Don’t tell me I’ll have to drag you.”

Scorpion cocked an eyebrow. “Depends on where you think you’ll be dragging me.”

His smile dimmed. “I thought it was Robyn. Shouldn’t you be upstairs?”

“I went to see Doc Brown. He signed off on me.” She handed him a file. “Cypher said you wanted this printout.”

Pegasus took it without even looking down. “Did you change jobs now?”

“It was on my way,” she said. It was a lie, but Pegasus ignored it. “Doc told me about Bear and how she’s worse. Seems she hasn’t been able to keep anything down. How’re you doing?”

Pegasus didn’t want to lie, but he didn’t want to tell her the truth either. Neither seemed a good enough answer.

He turned his back to her with the excuse of placing the papers on his desk. “So far, so good. Doesn’t look like you’ll be rid of me anytime soon.”

When he turned to face her, he was sure his expression was under control.

Scorpion took a step back as if she were done, but stopped again. “What in heaven’s name were you thinking in the first place? Were you trying to make a point?”

“It had nothing to do with you.” Pegasus sighed. “I was trying to save someone’s life. Which I guess was the point to begin with.”

“You could’ve died.”

Pegasus closed the distance between them, taking her hand. “Belle…”

She shook her head, clearly upset now, and pulled her hand from his grasp.

“Please don’t leave like that,” he asked.

“I have to go.” Her expression hardened. “And don’t you have a special project or something to distract yourself with while Dragon’s away?”

He held back his instinctive caustic reply and even managed a smile. “Be careful.”

Scorpion’s only response was a slight nod as she closed the door behind her.

Regardless of her puzzling animosity towards Sarah, Scorpion was right that Sarah was something of a distraction. As much as he told himself that it was work someone had to do, Sarah herself had been occupying too much of his mind lately.

* * *

Robyn finished checking her gear for the second or third time. She was having trouble focusing, all her thoughts returning to Sarah.

She couldn’t help it. Sarah was all she had left of a family and the thought of never seeing her again was killing her. Knowing her own faults in how things became this way only made it worse.

But it wasn’t her fault, right? It was the fault of circumstances. The circumstances that put her there, the circumstances that directed every course of action they took, every move they made. They were pieces on a board and they had about the same amount of free will.

It was all actions and reactions, and it was whatever they needed to do to survive. Nothing more, nothing less.

Struggling against it wouldn’t change anything, neither would hiding. And yet she choked when she tried telling Sarah about sending her back out.

“Hey Dragon, you going out?” Sphynx asked as he came up behind her.

She started, whirling around with wide eyes.

“What’s up?” he asked, laughing. “You look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

She laughed, finally breathing out. She forgot Sphynx would be there. “I was lost in my own mind.”

“Is it that big of a place to get lost in?”

She eyed the backpack slung over his shoulder. “You leaving?”

He nodded. “Going on loan to Center for a couple of weeks.”

“What? They don’t have enough reckless ops as it is?”

“Apparently not.”

“Good luck.”

“As if luck has anything to do with it.” He patted his backpack. “I still have the knife you gave me, so I should be fine.”

“See you around. Robyn waved him off when she saw Griffon approaching.

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“Dragon, you all set?” Griffon asked.

She nodded, gaze following Sphynx as he walked away.

“Mermaid should be here any second.” He stepped purposefully into her field of view. “What’s the matter with you?”

She schooled her expression as best she could.

“I know Athena and Doctor Brown cleared you, but I need you to tell me that you’re good.”

“I’m good.” She tried not to laugh at how ridiculous that sounded.

“Distracted?”

“No more than usual.”

He opened her bag and started rummaging through it, rechecking everything she’d checked. “And how’s your shoulder doing?”

“It’s fine. Why does everyone keep asking me that?”

“Well, you were whining about it almost constantly for the past couple of months. I figured it might be acting up again with all the training hours you’ve been putting in.”

She made a show of checking the motion of her right shoulder, then her left. “Nah, hasn’t started yet. I think it’s gonna get me when I actually need it for something important. But if there’s any sign of trouble, I’ll get Doctor Green to have a look at it.”

He didn’t say anything to that, maybe deciding it was easier to pretend he believed her.

“What’s on your mind?” he asked when she didn’t say anything else. Then, in a mocking tone, he added, “Tell me your troubles.”

She rolled her eyes. “We’re really doing this here? Now? Did you channel Athena all of a sudden?”

He responded with a shrug that reminded her of Pegasus. “Blame it on Mermaid being late.”

“Fine, I will.”

“And now tell me what’s bothering you.”

“I was thinking about one of the times I left home. Not today, but when things were more or less normal. I never said goodbye. And then…” She sighed. “Now I’m sending Sarah away and I don’t know how to say goodbye.”

“She’ll understand it’s for the best in the end. Don’t worry. You’ll have some time when we get back, before we send her out.”

“You’re right. As always.”

Griffon laughed. “I don’t know about that.”

“I’m gonna miss her.”

“Are you having second thoughts about sending her outside by herself?”

“No, it’s the right thing to do.” Robyn realized her expression was grim and tried to force a smile. “I mean, it wouldn’t be fair to keep her locked up in here. She deserves a life.”

“You could always keep an eye on her like I do with my mother.”

“Hey, guys. Ready to roll?” Mermaid interrupted as she joined them.

“Waiting for you, Madeleine,” Griffon said.

Mermaid winced as if the name had physically hurt her. “Must you call me that?”

Robyn zipped her bag back up since Griffon was done with it. “It’s a pretty name.”

“The others are waiting for us,” Griffon said as he started leading them out.

“Rock and roll,” Mermaid said with a wink. “And so long, world.”

The world offered no reply.

* * *

Sarah rolled her pillow up into a ball and was trying to tie the ends of the pillowcase when a knock sounded. She turned expectantly, forgetting all about her current attempt at a distraction by turning the pillow into a volleyball.

Did Robyn not leave yet?

“Sarah?” Pegasus called as the door opened.

“Oh, it’s you.” She should’ve known better.

“Can’t say I’m used to that reaction.”

“I thought it was Robyn.”

“A lot of that going on today.”

Her clenched fists pulled at the pillowcase, and the knot she’d tied earlier came undone. The more the fear tried to come back to the surface, the harder she squeezed. She lifted the pillow to throw it, but her ribs complained.

Glaring at the pillow as if it were the thing’s fault, she put it down.

“Robyn said you’d check in on me.”

“I wanted to go ahead and get started on your story…” Pegasus trailed off. “She didn’t explain to you what we’d be talking about?”

“No. She was vague and acting like the time when she overfed the fish and it died. I’m assuming this time there are no fish involved.”

“If I run, I can probably catch her and strangle her.” But he didn’t seem in any condition to be running anywhere.

Sarah could sympathize. “That’s Robyn for you. She’ll weasel her way out of anything that makes her uncomfortable.”

Pegasus nodded as if he understood.

“Is there any news on the suspicions that I’m a clone front?”

Pegasus didn’t say anything, gaze far away.

Was he deciding how much he could share with her?

“Why are you here?” Sarah asked, changing subjects.

He shrugged. “Just checking to make sure you’re not learning how to use an old paperclip and chewing gun to make a bomb or something.”

She laughed. “Seriously.”

He nodded towards the abandoned tray of food she’d left on the table. “Haven’t you been eating?”

“Didn’t feel like it.”

“You really should eat.”

Sarah crossed her arms. He really wasn’t the best person to be enforcing healthy habits onto anyone. “And shouldn’t you be home resting? You don’t look any better.”

“I’m not feeling any better.” He plopped down onto a chair. “I am home, and this is as much rest as I can handle.”

“You really live here?”

“Yeah.”

She walked over and pulled the food tray closer to her, examining its contents. “What do you do here when you’re not doing stuff?”

“There’s usually something to do. If by a miracle there isn’t… Well, I usually find something.”

“Like babysitting prisoners?”

“Comes with the job.”

“I don’t know how you stand it. I’m half bored out of my mind and half out of my mind.” She looked at the mirror again, thankful she couldn’t see her own reflection. “I’m restless and tired of only being outside in my dreams, and that’s not even a good thing.”

He looked confused. “Your dreams?”

“Can they be nightmares if nothing bad happens?”

“Shouldn’t nightmares be bad things?” His voice reached her as if from a distance, but he hadn’t moved.

She shook her head mechanically. “Maybe they’re nightmares even if they’re good because they’re not real. Like dreaming of home when there is no home left.”

“I guess you could think of it that way.” He looked at his watch. “Sorry, I have to go check something. I’ll be right back. Try to eat.”

Sarah was so distracted that she barely noticed he was leaving until the door was already closing. She rushed towards it, trying to keep it from shutting. She wanted to call out, but she choked on the words before she could bring herself to call him Pegasus.

“Hey! Wait!”

She was a second too late, and the door closed despite her protests. She almost got hit with it in the face when it swung open again.

“What is it?” Pegasus asked.

She stopped and frowned at him. “Every time I’m about to say your name, I picture a fairytale-style winged horse. I don’t think I can do it. Could I please call you something else?”

“No.” He was completely serious for almost two seconds before he laughed. “Is that what you wanted to talk about?”

“No.”

“What was it then?”

“Can you tell me where Robyn’s going?” she asked before she lost her nerve. “She tried not to make a big deal out of it, but I figure everything you guys do here is dangerous. Or am I wrong?”

“I don’t want to worry you any more than you are, but I also don’t want to brush aside your concerns. More often than not, what we do here is dangerous.” He came back inside the room and closed the door. “But this is what Robyn chose to do. Partly because she’s trying to protect you, she can’t tell you the specifics. But what she’s doing right now is important. It is necessary, and in the end, it will save lives.”

Sarah nodded. She understood that. And she was trying not to seem unreasonable in her worries. If Robyn had chosen to be a cop or a firefighter, would she have objected? Or would she simply have pointed out that someone who lacked the necessary hand-eye coordination for volleyball shouldn’t be using guns and left it at that?