You start thundering down the stairs the second the clock reaches eight thirty, the exact time that Dabi had told you his big meeting would be over.
Well, they had all been at the meeting, leaving you completely alone for two hours for the first time since leaving home and being on the streets. It had been weird, even if you could hear the slight murmuring downstairs from your room.
You had spent the first hour or so drawing, actually finally making use of the sketchbook that Giran had bought you a little while ago. It was mostly because he kept asking you to use it, claiming that the imperfections you may create would be good to look at the better you get, eventually promising that if you ended up messing up this sketchbook, he'd get you a brand new one.
Eventually, the drawing got boring, particularly during the colouring in, which became mundane and repetitive, so you gave up. Instead, you chose to lay on your side on top of your bed and watch the clock, waiting for the end of his meeting, gripping your teddy tightly in your arms.
The further down the stairs you get, the louder the voices coming from the bar sound. It sounded busy today, maybe more than just the usual seven of you.
You're surprised at the volume of noise coming from the bar. Usually Shigaraki would get a little snappy with people if it got a little too noisy, he liked things to be quiet for some reason.
When you finally enter the bar, you realize that it really was busy. There were new people everywhere, mostly male. A few of them were a lot bigger, and a lot more well built than you'd like. The sight makes you anxious nearly instantly, and you duck behind Kurogiri nervously.
"Miss Star." He greets, wringing out a towel. "What's the matter?"
"Where's Dabi?" You ask quietly, looking around, but struggling to find him amongst all the new, tall, people that were currently in the room.
"He's over by the jukebox, dear." Kurogiri informs you. "Would you like some juice? A snack?"
You shake your head, heading off towards the jukebox, knowing that finding Dabi would provide you with some comfort. You always felt a little safer with him nearby.
You manage to make your way through the busy bar without drawing too much attention to yourself, noticing everyone you knew had kind of huddled together.
When you spot Dabi, you stop dead in your tracks, your eyes widening in panic.
Dabi was leaning against the jukebox, something you were quite used to witnessing when he wanted to smoke. But the issue wasn't necessarily him, he looked as unbothered as always, his glacial eyes half-lidded, and his face set in a stoic expression.
The problem was who he was with.
Blonde, short hair, tall and muscular, with a large, red scar running down over one eye. He even had that cocky smirk that you knew so well from before still. He was chatting to Dabi animatedly, laughing even when Dabi didn't.
Before you can back off, away from Dabi, away from Imasuji, back to an area of safety and comfort before you begin panicking and making a scene and breaking the fourth rule, Dabi catches your eye, cracking a smirk and motioning for you to come over.
You shake your head a little bit, taking a small step back, only to freeze in place when Imasuji catches you in his gaze, a confused look crossing over his face before that horrible, smug grin is back on his face.
"What's the matter, Star?" Spinner asks, suddenly behind you.
That was almost worse, knowing that you were about to freak out any minute now and Spinner was the closest one to you.
"Star?" Imasuji asks with a derisive snort. "Aw, you got a whore name, jus' like your mama."
The blood rushes to your ears, and the whole room seems to go silent aside from the sound of your heartbeat in your own head.
Spinner pulls you close to him, in a move that was likely meant to be comforting, but sets off all kinds of alarms in your head, your arms moving before you could really think about it to shove him away.
He grunts a little at the shove, as you do it with a lot more force than you would have intended to if you weren't panicking. But he doesn't try to touch you again, instead putting his hands up in the air in a motion of surrender, offering a quiet apology.
"The fuck did you just say?" You hear Dabi ask lowly, his voice the lowest and most dangerous you'd ever heard it, his eyes piercing through Imasuji as though the saying 'if looks could kill' were real.
"You heard." Imasuji replies with a genuine chuckle of amusement.
The heat begins to rise, something that causes Spinner to gently try to lead you away from the two. You shake off his hand as harshly as you can, wanting to run, but your body is not complying.
"She's a kid. Watch your mouth." Shigaraki suddenly speaks up, his voice loud and clear from the bar.
You'd never heard him speak so loudly before, his voice piercing through everyone else's conversations and turning them all into background noise.
It was unlike him to get involved, and if your blood wasn't frozen in panic, and your brain wasn't fogged over, you'd probably have been thankful for him standing up for you.
The only thing is, his involvement then meant everyone else was suddenly paying attention to what was happening, and you were embarrassed.
Suddenly, you sprint, hearing the condescending laughter you hated so much when you were a little younger start up the second you do.
You hear Dabi call out for you, as well as Spinner, which then turns into Toga, and Jin as you roughly shove past them to go upstairs.
You're not thinking clearly as you slam the door shut, locking it behind you, your hands flying up into your hair, tugging at handfuls of your hair roughly in frustration.
You thought you were safe. You thought you'd never have to see people like him again. Mom had promised you before... You shut that thought down before you can finish it.
And Dabi has been so comfortable, so safe so far that it almost began to feel like home here.
And now it was all ruined.
Shigaraki had hired Imasuji, the man that had hurt mom, and you, and did nothing but laugh and gloat about it. You remember the night he had come around with all his friends, beating on momma and thumping you a couple times when you tried to stop him. Eventually, they'd chucked you outside and locked the door, not allowing you to get back in for hours.
Tears are streaming down your face without you even really noticing, noises leaving you that don't quite sound like you.
The sheer sound of your panic is almost enough to drown out the worried rapping at your door, the thumps eventually getting louder and louder, and doing nothing to quell your panic.
"Star? Star!" You hear Dabi yell through the door, the doorknob turning roughly in his desperation. "No locked doors! Let me in!"
You can barely breathe, never mind answer him. Your body's moving without you really feeling like you're inside it. It's like you're looking at yourself as you destroy your room, trying to create a safe place, like a little nest, somewhere you could shut all of this out.
"Star!" You hear him snap. "Lemme in. I'm not angry at you. I'm worried, I can hear you in there, and you're not havin' a good time."
"Go away!" You sob, the words leaving you without much thought going into them. "You're friends with bad people!"
There's a silence from your door as you continue dragging your sheets and pillows around, emptying your wardrobe so you can climb inside it, somewhere small and safe where it can just be you and teddy.
"Star. Let me in." He says firmly, but doesn't wiggle the door again or knock.
He sounds mad.
"No! You're friends with him! I hate you!" You yell, new tears rolling down your face the second the words fall out of your mouth.
Because you didn't hate him, you hate Imasuji. He was just collateral damage.
If Dabi didn't want to get rid of you before, he definitely would now. And you resign yourself to your fate being locked in this room and probably starving to death before going back to the streets again.
You climb into your wardrobe, hyperventilating and clutching your teddy tight to you, as if it was the only thing keeping you alive. You even tuck it's ear into your mouth, sucking on it gently like you used to as a toddler.
You don't calm down for hours, every time you manage to relax a little, you end up setting yourself off into floods of tears again when you remember what Imasuji did, when you think about how mad Dabi's going to be with you, and when you think about how you'd yelled that you hated him when you absolutely didn't.
During the time you're locked in your room, you hear several different people call through the door. Toga, Jin, even Spinner.
But not Dabi again.
Eventually, your eyes grow tired and heavy, and you begin dozing off against your will, your thumb coasting over the fur of your beloved teddy, and ragged breaths still making your body heave occasionally.
It's safe in your wardrobe, padded by your blanket and pillows, only enough room for you. No-one can get in and hurt you here.
*â¢*
You wake with a start, warm tears streaming down your face again.
The nightmare was exactly as expected. Dabi leaving you alone with Imasuji, and never coming back, leaving you alone, scared and being berated by one of the scariest boyfriends your mom had.
You also forget where you had fallen asleep, waking up in pitch black and silence, scared that somehow you'd cried yourself to a point of blindness before you sit up and accidentally nudge your wardrobe door open, letting in some of the moonlight coming through your window.
You remain curled up in your wardrobe for a little while, collecting yourself and remembering everything you had done before falling asleep.
Your face crumples again when you remember how badly you'd messed up.
Upstairs is too quiet, too.
Usually you'd hear Shigaraki's game noises all throughout the night, a sound that had once been a little unsettling, but now was like white noise to you. But there wasn't the sound of shooting, or metal clanging, or anything coming from his room.
You begin scaring yourself, convincing yourself that maybe Imasuji had hurt them, too, for sticking up for you, and you'd been ungrateful.
Maybe he'd even killed them.
A dull thud from downstairs makes you jolt, and that's about it for you, you picking up your teddy and making a run for the door, unlocking it and heading straight for Dabi's room, bursting in.
But he's not there.
You freeze, all the worst case scenarios coming to your mind. Maybe he really had left you, deciding to leave you with Shigaraki and the others. Maybe they'd all left you here alone.
So you decide to be brave, and go where the thump had come from. Sure, it was scary, but it was a sign of life.
You sneak down the stairs, careful not to step too heavily on the ones that creaked just in case it was Imasuji downstairs.
When you peer around the doorway, you're relieved to spot Dabi and Shigaraki at the bar, even if it was quickly followed by a gnawing feeling of anxiety from the fact they were still here, and probably mad at you.
You frown a little as you take in the full scene in front of you.
It's clear what had caused the thump, one of the barstools had fallen to the ground.
Dabi had Shigaraki pressed up against the bar, his messy black hair covering their faces. You wonder if they're fighting, your eyes widening as Shigaraki goes to place a hand at the back of Dabi's neck.
"Dabi?" You call, your fear for his safety outweighing the fear of his anger at you.
Dabi pushes himself away from Shigaraki, his eyes wide as he stares at you, wiping his mouth with the back of his scarred wrist. Shigaraki is flushed, his red eyes moving to glare at you from their corners.
Mad that you'd stopped him from hurting Dabi.
"Star!" Dabi exclaims in relief, ditching Shigaraki to come and crouch in front of you, his eyes running all over your face.
He looks a little sad, reaching out to cup your cheek. You lean into the touch, beyond thankful that he wasn't mad at you.
"I don't really hate you..." You murmur, trying to ignore the intensity of which Shigaraki is glaring at you as he straightens himself back out.
"I know, kid. I know. C'mon, let's get you back to bed." Dabi urges, standing up and motioning for you to go up the stairs.
You bob your head, more than happy to get away from Shigaraki. You're a little surprised that Dabi doesn't book it after you as well, instead choosing to stay downstairs a little longer, the rumble of his voice traveling through the stairwell indistinctly for a moment before he follows after you.
"How about you sleep in here wi' me tonight, hm?" Dabi says, the second you go to open your door, his head tilted towards his door.
"Really?" You ask distrustfully.
"You had a scary evenin', right?" Dabi asks patiently. "No sleepin' alone. Remember?"
You blink, before your face crumples up and you begin crying again, the floodgates apparently well and truly having been opened today.
Within no time at all, Dabi seems to have picked you up in his arms, carrying you as you grip onto your teddy, into his room and setting you gently onto his bed and promptly removing his jacket.
He climbs in next to you, pulling you tight to his chest, seemingly uncaring that your face is wet from tears and snot.
"You're alright, Star." He says softly, rubbing your back. "I got you. We all got you."
"You're not mad at me?" You sob, gripping the arm of your teddy in one hand and his white shirt in your other hand.
"No, Star, I ain't mad." He sighs, moving his hand to pet your hair. "I really don't want you lockin' yourself in your room like that again though, 'kay?"
"Okay!" You agree instantly between sobs. "You're not gonna leave me?"
"Told ya kid, here for ya till my dyin' breath. You don't gotta worry all the time." He replies.
You cry a little more, the relief from his words manifesting into more tears.
"I don't hate you! I really don't hate you!" You exclaim, nuzzling impossibly closer to him.
"I know." He responds with such ease that there's really no denying that it must be true.
It doesn't make you feel any less guilty, though.
He continues to hold you quietly as you attempt to calm yourself down, his mere presence helping a great deal to allow you to even out your breath again, and slowly stop the tears from falling as he pets your hair with a firm hand.
"You gonna tell me what went on back there?" He asks softly after a while, moving from petting your hair to playing with random strands.
You take a shaky breath. "Imasuji was mommys boyfriend for a while..."
Dabi hums, showing that he's listening, still fiddling with your hair mindlessly.
"...He wasn't very nice." You say quietly, not really wanting to go too much more into it.
Dabi nods a little, looking down at you softly.
"Why were you and Shigaraki fighting?" You ask, trying to change the subject. You didn't want to think about Imasuji anymore.
Dabi blinks, his eyes wide for a second before he chuckles. "We weren't fightin', kid."
"But-"
"Wanna know a secret?" Dabi interrupts in a half-whisper, smirking down at you.
"What?" You whisper back, looking up at him curiously.
"Shigaraki didn't like Imasuji one bit." Dabi informs you, and your mouth drops a little. "An' he decided for his next job, he's gonna make it real hard for him."
"Really?" You whisper.
"Really." He replies. "You shoulda seen it kid, he was all like 'you can't talk to Star like that! She's a valued party member', y'know... like a nerd."
You're surprised, to put it lightly, moving away from Dabi's chest a little to try and see the whole of his face a little clearer. He looks proud, smug even. He must be telling the truth.
"He likes me?" You ask in shock.
"In his own special way, kid." Dabi chuckles dryly. "Helps that he really hates bullies, too. And dumb names like 'Muscular'."
"Muscular?" You repeat, slightly confused.
"That's what Imasuji introduced himself as." Dabi replies, amusement clear in his voice. "Really loves the sound o' his own voice, too. Doesn't shut up. Y'know how much Shigaraki hates that."
You nod, thinking about this for a moment.
"Muscular is a really dumb name." You agree, finally.
Dabi gives a single nod, chuckling again, returning to stroking your hair.
You lay in his arms, finally calm, no longer worried about Imasuji, Dabi being mad at you, or Shigaraki hating you for the moment.
It doesn't take long for the anxiety to gnaw at you again as Dabi's hand slows down it's petting of your hair, and his breathing becomes more rhythmic.
"Dabi?" You ask quietly.
"Hm?"
"I'm sorry for yelling at you." You whisper. "And being bad and breaking rule four."
Dabi hushes you, kissing your forehead sleepily. His bottom lip feels a little funny compared to the top one, kind of ridged, which tickles slightly.
You don't remember him doing that before, and to your surprise, you don't hate it.