The atmosphere was miserable for a little while after you got back to the hotel from Girans.
You don't mind, you completely understand. It was weird without Magne around, it felt like there was something huge missing whenever you went downstairs and she wasn't there.
It was sad to be around though.
You didn't like seeing Toga going from her usually chirpy self to her face crumpling up out of nowhere as she would randomly burst into tears.
You didn't like seeing Jin argue with himself when he finally tore himself from his room, even if he was especially cuddly with you on account of his bad mood.
You didn't like seeing Spinner seem dead behind the eyes, his usually pretty and shiny scales dull and almost faded as if he was sick, too.
Atsuhiro was apparently sick in his room as well, and you weren't allowed to be too loud upstairs in case you disturbed him. Not that you ever were anyway, but you didn't want to annoy Shigaraki by saying that.
The only people that seemed unaffected were Kurogiri, Dabi and Shigaraki.
Dabi said he was sad, but you never saw him cry. He only ever really seemed to get a sad glint in his eye and have the corners of his mouth dip slightly whenever you cried about it.
Shigaraki seemed to be in a particularly bad mood, but not necessarily upset.
He was just a lot more quiet than usual, scrolling on his phone, reading or musing and tapping his fingers on whatever was closest.
You hadn't even seen him with his handheld console once.
In fact, you were beginning to think he was sleeping downstairs and not washing. You hadn't seen him change his clothes since coming back from Girans, and his hair seemed to be getting more and more wet looking as time went on.
When Atsuhiro was better, you were amazed when he'd shown you his new arm, flexing the metal appendage proudly.
He wouldn't tell you what had happened to his arm which had led to him needing a replacement, and when you'd asked Dabi, Spinner interrupted and told you that there was an accident with Atsuhiros magic, but wouldn't tell you any more than that. Even Shigaraki seemed to huff in amusement at that.
It was all very mysterious, and you were in awe of it.
Once Atsuhiro was back, everyone seemed to get back to their usual selves a little more and more each day.
In maybe a little over a week, they were back to work, even if Toga and Jin were still struggling with the loss of Magne.
Dabi said you couldn't go back to Giran's when they all disappeared for an hour or so for the first time since Magne had died.
He was still mad at him, even though you'd heard Giran try to stick up for him.
So you had been left with Kurogiri and the others whenever Dabi was working.
Himiko was still a little emotionally unstable, so you tried to leave her alone unless she came to you first. You didn't want to accidentally upset her.
Jin was still trying to avoid everyone as much as possible, and whenever you asked Dabi why, he told you that he blamed himself for Magne.
You thought that was ridiculous though, because it wasn't Jin's fault that the nasty man made Magne sick.
You continued to try to avoid Spinner as much as possible whenever you could, although you did enjoy your English lessons with him.
It wasn't too bad being around him when he was sick, but now he was feeling better and his scales were shiny again and his eyes were sharp, his hair was getting longer and longer, and you found yourself getting more flustered around him again.
Whenever Dabi saw you interact with Spinner he'd sometimes tease you for it, and Jin would ruffle your hair and give you a knowing little smile whenever Spinner complimented your work and made you blush.
Atsuhiro sometimes played card games with you and if he was in a good mood he would show you magic tricks, but never tried to replicate the one that took his arm. But a lot of the time he was out with the others or in his room.
Sometimes everyone would be out, or in their rooms, and that would leave you with just Shigaraki and Kurogiri to keep you company.
Shigaraki sometimes let you play his console, or watch TV in the bar, and sometimes you'd work on math worksheets together, but he didn't really indulge in conversation or play much with you like Jin and Himiko did.
Dabi told you it was because he had important things to do.
You were still just kind of convinced that he just hated you, or wanted Dabi to himself, or was still mad at you for seeing him take his medicine.
That was, until it happened.
You'd had a migraine all day again, which Dabi had helped you through, despite him having one of his bad pain days.
He made sure your hair was tied back so it wouldn't add to the sweaty spells, let you starfish on the bed without complaining and just sucked up the little slither of space he had to himself. He also made sure you drank lots of water and took painkillers when it was okay to.
This time you didn't embarrass yourself and throw up. Lucky, because Himiko was out shopping, and wouldn't have been able to bathe you like she did last time.
It was when he told you he had to go to work there was a problem.
He really did try to make sure everything would be okay while he was gone. He told you it was okay to stay in bed and that someone would come and check on you regularly to make sure you weren't too sick.
He smelt a little funky, like those weird cigarettes he sometimes smoked when his scars hurt too much, when he kissed your damp forehead goodbye. But you didn't mind, treasuring the feeling of being cared for anyway.
And you were fine for the first hour, dozing on and off, barely registering Shigaraki's presence when he came to check on you the first time.
But by the second hour, you began getting a terrible tummy ache. One you'd never felt before, it felt as though someone was gripping your stomach as tight as they could, and you couldn't help but let out little strained cries of pain as you curled in on yourself.
The second time Shigaraki checks on you, he tentatively comes into the room.
Rather humiliatingly, you're crying, curled up and clutching your stomach.
"What is it?" He asks, frowning as he slowly approaches you.
"My tummy hurts." You whine, bringing your knees closer to your chest when another surge of pain ripples through your torso.
"It does?" He asks, kneeling down next to the bed. "Can I touch you?"
You nod, deciding to worry about the consequences later.
Slowly, he reaches one of his hands out to brush stray strands of your hair out of your face with three fingers, making your view of his frown a lot clearer.
He presses the back of his hand against your forehead when you don't flinch away from his touch. He deliberately curls his fingers into his palm too, from the feel of it.
His wrinkled brow furrows a little more when he feels your temperature, he himself flinches when another jolt of pain rocks through your stomach and yanks his hand away from you to avoid any accidental fatal touches.
"Be careful." He warns, but his voice lacks the usual bite to it.
You groan in pain in response, feeling the weight of his crimson eyes weigh down on you as you scrunch your eyes up and try to overcome the pain.
"How long ago did Dabi last give you medicine?" He asks, folding his arms over the mattress.
"Before he went to work." You sniffle.
Shigaraki cranes his neck momentarily, presumably to look at the clock. "Two hours..."
He ducks his head lower, his eyes raking over you as you tremble slightly in pain.
"Let me see what I can do." He says, getting up slowly.
You whimper a little as his hand lands in your hair uncharacteristically.
Luckily he doesn't seem to take too long doing whatever he went to do, coming back with two capsules in hand.
He takes his place kneeling opposite you again, placing the pills close to you and reaching for the glass of water on the nightstand.
He was being pretty considerate of not touching you currently, looking as though he was ready to catch you if you needed help sitting up at any point.
You manage to get up and pick up the capsules, taking the glass of water with a small 'thank you'.
The pills are big and a little hard to swallow, but you manage it with a big swig of water, handing the glass back to Shigaraki.
You grip your stomach as it pains you again.
Shigaraki reaches for you, pauses, and then continues, rubbing your back a little harsher than would be considered comforting. You don't mind too much, just appreciating the fact that Shigaraki wasn't being mean about it.
"Don't tell Dabi I gave you two of those." He rasps as he continues rubbing your back a little too roughly.
"We don't have secrets." You manage to say through gritted teeth.
Shigaraki scoffs a little, but continues trying to soothe you in his own way.
"Sure, brat." He replies with an ever so slight hint of amusement, standing once more. "Try to get some more sleep."
You're more than eager to follow that advice. If you're asleep, you're not in pain. That seemed like a no-brainer.
You lie back down with Shigaraki keeping a watchful eye on you as you do so.
When you lie back down he carefully drapes the blanket over you. If you weren't in agony, you'd wonder why he was being so nice to you.
"I'll check on you later." He says simply, staring down at you for a second longer.
He doesn't look down at you for long before turning on his heel and leaving the room, leaving the door ajar.
You feel a little uncomfortable with the door being ajar, but you suppose that it may be so he can get to you quicker if you need him to, or hear you better if you call for him.
You're not conscious for too much longer anyway to dwell on it, curled up with your duck plushie.
*â¢*
You're unsure when you wake up exactly, but when you do, you're still uncomfortable, clinging onto Ducky.
The door is still ajar, no sign of Shigaraki hanging around.
You take a rare moment of no tummy cramping to plod to the bathroom, clutching your stomach.
But when you pull your pyjamas down you're horrified to see blood stains on them.
You stare wordless for a moment before pulling them back up, grabbing one of the big sweaters that Giran had given you and throwing it over your head, bolting out of the room soon after.
When you flee the room, you run straight into someone, earning a low winded noise from them.
You look up and stare into a sea of red.
He doesn't look mad, at least. In fact, he looks kind of entertained by the fact you'd just run full pelt into him.
"Sorry!" You apologise immediately. "Is Dabi home yet?"
"No." Shigaraki replies bluntly. "I take it you're feeling better."
Your face crumples immediately.
His expression changes, a frown pulling non-existent eyebrows together.
"What? What is it?" He asks, eyes running all over you as if looking for a physical sign.
He would have found it had you not had the second hand sweater on.
"I think I'm dying." You sob.
"You're not dying." He replies with an eye roll, trying to usher you back into your room.
"I'm bleeding." You announce in your panic, rubbing your eyes in an attempt to brush away tears.
"You are?" He asks, confused, brows furrowing again as he looks you over once more. "Where?"
You grip the hem of the sweater, pulling it lower as you feel the heat rise in your face. You couldn't tell Shigaraki. It was humiliating. Maybe you could get him to call Uncle Giran?
Somehow this simple action gets Shigaraki's brain whirring as he simply says 'oh', as if it were obvious what was wrong.
You look up at him, expecting some kind of further comment, maybe even an explanation. But he just looks away, eyes still slightly narrowed for a moment.
When he looks at you again he asks:
"Your mom never told you about this?"
"About what?" You ask, confused. "You knew my mom?"
He looks at you in irritation for a moment before visibly trying to soften his expression. It doesn't really work though, because you'd already seen the original look of annoyance.
"I didn't know her." He says in clear strained kindness. "The question was: she never told you about periods?"
"Periods?" You parrot, wincing and curling your arm around your stomach.
He sighs, ushering you back into your room again.
You obey him out of politeness but you really wanted to find someone more soothing to be around right now.
He gently pushes you into the room with his hand between your shoulders, one finger carefully raised.
"Lie back down." He orders. "With one of these."
He gestures vaguely at Ducky and your teddy.
You follow his instructions, covering yourself with a blanket as well as the sweater just in case he sees. You shyly pull Ducky closer to you.
"Hold it real tight here." He instructs, pointing at his lower stomach.
You squeeze it tight, feeling less embarrassed of the instinct to do exactly that anyway now you'd been told to do it.
"Good." He nods curtly. "I'll get you a hot water bottle and call Toga back."
He turns to leave, scratching the messy mop of hair on his head.
"Can Dabi come back too?" You ask quietly.
He pauses and then nods his head, leaving the room.
His advice of pressing the plushie close to your stomach helped a little whenever you had a sudden wave of pain, but it still wasn't enough to dull it completely.
You were still unconvinced that you weren't dying, after all, what hurts this much if it didn't lead to death?
But Shigaraki was blunt, a truth-teller to a fault. You could probably safely assume that whatever he said was the truth.
When he comes back, he thrusts a hot water bottle at you.
You take it a little coyly, unsure what to do with it.
Shigaraki seems to pick up on this, sighing and moving your duck plushie out of the way, helping you lead it to your stomach.
"Keep it there." He says gruffly. "It helps."
He kneels down again, grabbing the TV remote and turning it on some random cartoon at a low volume, and then crossing his arms on the opposite side of the mattress to you once more.
"You're staying?" You ask, surprised.
He shrugs. "Toga isn't here yet."
"Dabi's coming back?" You ask.
"Yeah." He grunts, his eyes on the TV and not you.
You say a small 'okay', cuddling the hot water bottle a little closer once you realise it did actually help more so than applying pressure.
It was unlike Shigaraki to willingly spend time with you alone outside of doing math, but you were thankful for the company right now.
"I'm not dying?" You ask, your voice small.
"You're not dying." He confirms, sincerely this time.
Red eyes peer at you through long strands of pale blue hair that peek out from his hoodie. His eyes don't look as sharp as usual, his red irises a little warmer than usual.
He looked oddly pretty like he had when you had first seen him without the weird hand he usually wore around the others.
He definitely felt more approachable like this.
"Shigaraki?" You ask. "What's a period? Why didn't mom tell me?"
He looks uncomfortable for a second, but it's short-lived, replacing itself with his usual look of indifference.
"Your mom didn't tell you a lot of stuff." He says blandly. "Periods are when you bleed once a month. It's normal for people with uteruses."
"Once a month?!" You squeak in surprise and disappointment.
This revelation completely distracts you from the less than favorable comment he made about your mom. You knew she wasn't the best mom, but you didn't want other people to talk badly about her. Especially people like Shigaraki that didn't know her.
"...What's a uteruses?" You follow it up with.
He glances at you as if to check if you're being serious.
You were.
His eyes roll away again, resting on the TV once more.
"Toga will explain it all to you." He replies, his tone final.
You nod, going quiet as you take the not-so-subtle hint that he no longer wanted to discuss it with you.
Thankfully, Himiko skips through the door about ten minutes later with a plastic bag full of stuff from the looks of it.
Shigaraki stands up to leave as she kneels beside you, immediately draping herself over you and kissing your cheek.
"Thank you, Shigaraki." You call a little uncertainly.
He pauses, turning his head slightly.
"You're welcome, brat." He replies, but his voice isn't nearly as harsh as it usually sounds.
"Goodnight."
"... Goodnight, little Star." He replies, leaving the room and leaving you with Toga.
*â¢*
After being lovingly shoved into the shower once more by Himiko, being changed into fresh pyjamas, having a horrendously embarrassing explanation of how to use pads and tampons from her and being tucked back into bed with your hot water bottle and plushies, Himiko had slid into bed next to you, curling her body around yours like some kind of cat.
She even nuzzled the top of your head with her cheek like a cat would too.
You were relaxed now, the hot water bottle helping alongside the painkillers, and you hadn't realised you'd fallen asleep, not even shifting a little when Himiko had moved away from you, tucking all the chocolate she'd bought you into the nightstand closest to you quietly.
She'd even kissed your forehead before leaving the room which you had barely registered.
You only wake up when Dabi comes back, the warmth of his hand moving your hair out of your face enough to stir you from your sleep.
"Dabi." You murmur sleepily, turning and reaching for him.
"Starshine." He greets as quietly as his voice allows. "How's your belly?"
You grumble incoherent displeasure as you curl up into his side, his body warm enough to replace the loss of the hot water bottle.
His hand goes to your head, ruffling your hair.
"Sucks. I know." He replies. "Saw Toga got you a buncha chocolate though. An' I may have gotten you a little somethin' too..."
You struggle to open your eyes at this, looking up at him through sleep blurred vision curiously.
He runs a thumb over your cheek before turning slightly, reaching for something on the nightstand and plopping it on your head. It feels kind of like a mini bean bag.
Whatever it is, it's warm, and it smells nice, almost floral.
You reach for it, feeling something soft under your fingertips. You take it off your head, ignoring Dabi's smirk, to inspect it.
"Another ducky..." You reply in awe.
A warm one, that smelt nice.
You'd never had so many plushies in your life, never mind so many soft new ones.
You clutch it to your chest, thanking Dabi twice in quick succession. He chuckles, rubbing your head again.
"It's a little heatable beanie baby." He explains. "It smells like lavender, 'cause that's meant to relax ya, or some sh- or somethin'."
"Thank you." You mumble into the soft toy again.
"Hopefully it should help a little wi' your cramps." Dabi says. "Don't expect gifts every time though, don't wantcha to get too spoiled."
"I won't!" You vow, pressing your face into his side again. "Love you."
"Yeah, yeah, love ya too, Starshine." Dabi replies, petting your hair.
"Toga says I'll feel bad for a week." You inform him.
"Yeah." He replies sympathetically.
"That sucks." You gripe.
"Sure does."
You're quiet again, fingers rubbing your new plushies wings.
You can feel his breathing begin to slow as time goes on, the rhythm of his fingers running through your hair becoming inconsistent.
"Shigaraki was nice." You say quietly.
"You were brave tellin' him." Dabi praises, his voice rough with sleep. "Prouda you."
Your heart lifts a little, and you move closer to him.
He seems more receptive to touch than he had been earlier on in the day, not making a single peep as you cuddle up beside him.
You're cosy, and warm, and not in pain for the first time today, so your eyes begin to droop shut too.
You're just about to drop off yourself, fully convinced Dabi was out cold when he speaks up, his voice almost an indecipherable murmur.
"When you're all grown up, ya gonna leave me?" He asks.
He sounds sad.
You shake your head weakly, gripping his shirt with one hand as if he was going to slip from under your fingers if you didn't.
"Never ever." You promise. "You're my pawpaw."
You mumble another 'love you' as your consciousness fades, feeling only the scrape of staples and the press of lips against the top of your head in return.