Volume 1 - CH 5

Morning. Counting in Akiko-san, all four of our family were sitting around the kitchen table. Since Akiko-san came home late yesterday, or rather this morning, she should still be sleeping at this point in time.

“Summer solstice is around the corner, isn’t it~” She said, with a yawn.

She apparently woke up because of the sunlight being too bright. This being the case, I think it might be a good idea to install shading curtains in their bedroom. Since my old man probably never thought about it, I’ll tell him later.

“I’ll go get some more sleep later,” Akiko-san said, and yet kept standing in the kitchen.

At the same time, since my father didn’t have to leave for work early, he could leisurely read the newspaper on his tablet. Hence, we’d be eating breakfast as the four of us.

“Here, Dad, take care of that.”

“Gotcha.”

I gave him a tablecloth to wipe the table. With a grin, he wiped his own part of the table, as well as Akiko-san’s. After everything was sparkling clean, Akiko-san and Ayase-san started lining up today’s breakfast. Possibly because it was both of them cooking, we had a greater variety today. Lastly, they seemed to be preparing rolled omelette, atop a frying pan made for rolled eggs (brought by Akiko-san, as we didn’t have this before in our house), as they rolled around the long eggs using long chopsticks. It looked like a master’s work, as I didn’t even see eggs inside the finished omelette. Even while sampling the miso soup, Ayase-san stared at Akiko-san’s handicraft.

After we all clapped our hands together, thanking each other for the food, we dug in. Of course, we all reached for Akiko-san’s rolled omelette first. The second I bit into the piece from my chopsticks, the juicy taste of sauce filled my mouth. This is different from the taste I expected…What is it?

“Delicious. But…wait, it’s not…rolled omelette?”

“It’s special Japanese-style.”

Even though Akiko-san was the one who made them, Ayase-san gave me a response.

“Japanese-style rolled omelette?”

“Rolled omelette normally tastes like egg, right? If you want salt, then you just add that, and those who like it sweet can put some sugar in the mix.”

“Sugar?”

“Do you not like sweet food? If so, then I’ll leave it out next time.”

“Ah, no…I’m fine with whatever. It’s just, you can even make sweet rolled omelette, huh.”

“Eh…”

“Hm?”

Even if you look at me like I was some alien, I can’t give you a different answer…

“…You are attending cooking class, right?”

“Y-Yeah. But, we never made rolled omelette. It was always only fried eggs.”

“Hmmm. But yeah, Japanese-style rolled omelette you make by adding soup stock1 inside.”

“Soup stock…So like a noodle soup base?”

“We’re doing it with white soy sauce, mirin2, and sugar most of the time.”

She looked over towards the kitchen, at a specific white bowl. I see, since we only use salt, soy sauce, and sugar here, she, or rather, Akiko-san probably brought this with her.

“That’s why it tastes more like the soup stock rather than egg. Of course, sometimes it’s a bit more salty. If you want it more sweet, you use mirin. You can also use soy sauce, but then the rolled omelettes don’t keep their yellow color.

“You sure know a lot.”

“Saki-chan can make it as well. Maybe you can make some for Yuuta-kun since he liked the taste?”

“I can’t make it that well…”

“I personally like fried eggs.”

“…I see. I’ll make some if I feel like it.”

Basically, this is what was going on behind Ayase-san’s and my conversation. ‘You don’t need to do more work outside the contract. I don’t mind at all’, is what I said, to which Ayase-san responded with ‘Thanks, I’ll make some if I have the time’. As a result of that, both our own desires and opinions got through perfectly. Much better than using some secret coded language, as that offered easier misconceptions.

Not realizing this at all however, my old man just kept praising Akiko-san’s food until the end of time. Calling it ‘most delicious in the entire world’ is taking it a bit too far if you ask me. Are you just trying to flirt? With everybody else around? Can you not? You’re totally ruining my motivation for the day.

I was searching for another topic in order to change the conversation, when I remembered something.

“Oh right, it’s my turn this week for laundry, but can I just take Akiko-san’s and Ayase-san’s clothes for it?”

“Ah, that’s…” Ayase-san started her words, but eventually gulped them down again.

I tilted my head, confused. It’s rare for Ayase-san to fumble over her own words like that. Did I say something bad by any chance?

“Well, if you’re okay with it, then I’d like to take care of the laundry all-together, Yuuta-kun.” Akiko-san threw in.

“Eh? I can’t do that.”

After we’ve decided to live together as four, we split up the housework. A lot of things changed there already, but I can’t just give her more responsibility…

“But, doing it for four people must be tough, right?” Akiko-san pressed even further.

With how desperate she seemed, even I started to pick up on something. Now that I think about it, having a man take care of a woman’s clothes to the point of washing them, isn’t that pretty insensitive? But, because I was so busy with trying not to burden her anymore, I completely disregarded that. That was bad. Before I could take back my idea, Ayase-san was forced to explain it to me.

“Leaving even my underwear to Asamura-kun is a bit…well…A-And also, they need some special treatment compared to normal clothes. Do you know which to put in what laundry net?”

“Which in…what?” I added, but gave her an eye contact to apologize for making her say that.

“If you wash the bras just like that, they’ll change in shape, and the hook can get caught in the other clothes, right? That’s why there’s a special washing net for bras. When you have cute pa—inner underwear, the smaller decorations on it can get caught up with other clothes as well…”

Even in the midst of this awkward atmosphere, Ayase-san carefully explained the problem. Thanks to that, I understood how complicated washing a woman’s clothes really was.

“Also, don’t you split clothes which are more strong and weak in color? You do put clothes with three-dimensional objects on them into a different net, right? Otherwise they’d get peeled off.”

“Three-dimensional objects, you mean like drawings or logos stuck to the fabric?”

“Yup, that.”

“Ahh, that’s why they peeled off after every washing round.”

Hearing my words, Ayase-san held her head. She however quickly raised it again, and announced.

“With this level of knowledge, I cannot leave my clothes to you, Asamura-kun, so I will wash them myself.”

“Ah, yeah…Understood.”

Sensing the awkward atmosphere, Akiko-san spoke up with a gentle smile.

“I take care of Taichi-san’s clothes anyway, so why don’t I wash yours together, Yuuta-kun?”

Listening to these words, I imagined the scenery of her going through my laundry basket. Akiko-san will…wash my underwear? …No way in hell.

“…I really understand how awkward you must have felt, Ayase-san.”

“Right?” She let out a sigh.

Yeah, I see how it is. Sorry about that.

When I opened the front door, I was immediately greeted with the roaring hammering of the rain hitting the windows and railing. We’ll be going together, is what Ayase-san said, and left the house with me, leaving me confused as to what happened. So far, she always insisted on leaving first. I mean, since she’s my step-sister, my little sister in this context, walking together to school isn’t anything weird…Or is it? I feel like it’d be weird for siblings to be on their way to and from high school. Or am I just thinking too deeply into it?

“There’s something I wanted to talk about.” Inside the elevator, on our way down, Ayase-san suddenly said that.

I see. That made sense. Of course, I had no idea as to what, but it was very much like Ayase-san to be direct.

“I wanted to apologize.”

“…Apologize?”

For what? I thought about our exchanges this morning. Did she do something worth apologizing for? I should be the one, after how insensitive I was…

But, Ayase-san stayed quiet even after we stepped out of the mansion. We walked along the almost empty street, our umbrellas lining up to protect us from the rain. It was the perfect time for us to talk about something more private, at least until we made it near the school.

The line of buildings was emphasized through the rain falling on it, as the both of us had to be careful of the passing cars, so that they didn’t drench us because of the rain puddles at the side of the street. After stopping once because of that, Ayase-san slowly started walking again, as her face tightened up a bit.

“Anything discriminative, even subconsciously, is something I can’t stand. That’s why, I’m sorry.” She said with a serious expression.

My face shot sideways, and I could tell that she was seeing this as an important conversation. She took a deep breath, and let it out.

“It’s not impossible that you might be wearing lingerie from an expensive brand on you after all.”

It is pretty much impossible though.

“Even though I always try to not fall into typical gender roles…”

“Wait, Ayase-san.”

“Asamura-kun, I can see how you’re taking care of your body. Even yesterday, you put your drenched clothes into the washing machine right away. I haven’t seen you put in lip gloss or foundation, but you seem like the type who’d be very conscious about that.”

“Calm down, Ayase-san.” I walked in front of her.

In order to stop her rampaging thoughts, I needed to halt her movement, so that she could focus only on me. Through that, Ayase-san stopped, and looked up at me from beneath the umbrella.

“…Okay, I’ve calmed down.”

“Ah, sure.”

“Even if you prefer female clothing doesn’t mean you’re wearing it in reality after all.”

No good, she’s not calm at all.

“Just take a deep breath, and think about it. You saw the washing room of my home, right?”

“Hmmm…” Ayase-san dove into her thoughts. “Um…right, well, I saw shaving cream and razor. I didn’t find any cosmetics for women…I think.”

“Right?”

“But, your eyebrows have such a great shape.”

“Huh?”

“You must be taking care of them in some way. I didn’t see a comb, but you might be visiting a beauty salon instead—”

“A barber, yes.”

Do you really think a boy like me could just waltz into a beauty salon? Even if we’re living in the town of the young – Shibuya – that doesn’t mean that everybody is obsessed with cosmetics and brands. I save my money for books instead.

“Eh? Then, are your eyebrows natural?”

“That’s it, yep.”

Ayase-san stared at me.

“I can’t believe it…I’m so jealous…”

“I-Is it really that big of a detail?”

“…How vexing…” With these words, Ayase-san started walking again.

I stayed silent, and walked after her.

“Listen.” I spoke up.

“What?”

“About what you just talked about. You know, gender roles and that stuff.”

“Yeah.”

“Gender roles are that, right Acting out a role depending on the gender.”

Putting it simply, it’s that men act like men, and women act like women. That’s what gender roles refer to. What action is ‘like’ this or that gender is sadly decided by shared hallucinations and imaginations called the public, and we as small individuals cannot influence that logic.

“Correct. But, there’s no set limit that there can be only two genders, don’t you agree?”

“Well, yeah.”

Of course I would know about that. As long as you read books, you learn about all sorts of things, even if you want to or not. And, it often ends up in the news lately. I think with facebook, you can show up to 58 custom genders now. Became a recent topic after all.

On top of that, you can’t just simply label as man or woman just going with DNA. Apparently, Ayase-san was thinking the same thing as me.

“The differentiation of humanity happens with the use of chromosomes, right…”

“The X chromosome and the Y chromosome.”

“Yup. There’s X and Y chromosomes, and by mixing them together, you get a sex. XX means it’s a girl, and XY means it’s a boy. It’s a single chromosome out of the 46 we humans possess, with it’s X and Y variation. How many percent of the genome over all is that?” Ayase-san said, regrettably.

“Well, it’s clear that it’s not that big of a difference.”

“Because of that small difference, we’re being pressed into a role.”

In the midst of the pouring rain, only her voice reached my ears.

“It’s the same with self-identification. There are people whose gender given to them through genes is different from their real one, and this has slowly been more in the public’s eye.”

I knew of the logic Ayase-san was speaking of. But, I was born as a boy, and in my mind, I’m a boy as well, so it’s a bit hard for me to fully understand.

“Same goes for love. Men love, women love, both love, and both don’t. Romantic feelings aren’t normal, not foreseen by nature…You can both agree and disagree with that. It all comes back to the clothes we’re decorating ourselves with. According to genes, you’re a girl, you see yourself as a girl, and you like men, but when it comes to the clothes of the opposite sex…basically male clothes, it’s not rare for women to like them. At the same time, it’s not weird if a man were interested in wearing women’s lingerie.”

“Well, yeah.”

“And yet, in that one moment, I completely disregarded that possibility.” Ayase-san said with a regrettable tone.

Is this what I think it is? The macro point of view might be correct, but you can see differences when diving deeper into micro territory? Just because half of humanity is like this means that this person must be like that as well—is greatly flawed thinking after all.

Even in the event that I was a man wearing female underwear on a daily basis, nothing would have been different, like we’d be sisters washing our underwear. If I had to guess, Ayase-san probably isn’t bothered by the idea of having her underwear washed by her mother. However, that one moment today, when she thought of me washing her underwear, her biologically-induced sense of shame got the better of her.

Normally I’d forget about it with an ‘No problem’, but Ayase-san seems to be bothered about it. She’s always fighting after all. Facing these gender roles the public is constantly pushing onto others, she wants to carefully think everything through one by one. To me, who just let everything happen normally, acting indifferent, that looked awfully dazzling.

“Well, if you’re going to say that, then I should apologize myself. I felt embarrassed when I thought of Akiko-san washing my underwear.”

“It’s not a problem of how other people feel. I can’t forgive myself. That’s why I wanted to apologize.”

“Hmmm…” I thought about it for a second.

I can agree with her thoughts, but this diligent thinking is probably only making her suffer in the process. Is there a more comfortable way of thinking that doesn’t deny her ideas, I wonder.

I could see the school gate in the distance. That would mean that the number of students around us would rise in number, and we couldn’t continue talking like this.

“…It’s like a reflex, right.”

“Reflex?”

Sometimes I can’t follow what Ayase-san is thinking at all. Then again, that’s pretty fun in itself.

“Like, when you act before you think. That one”

“Ahh, that. When you hit your knee, your leg moves, something like that?”

“Exactly.”

There are times when people act before their brains can keep up. When something flies towards you, you reflexively close your eyes. When you touch something hot, your hand pulls back before you tell it to.

“Humans have evolved to let their brain handle the thinking. So, why do we have this mechanism inside of us, is what I often ask myself.” I looked at Ayase-san.

“That’s…If they used the time to think during that emergency, they have less time to actually act, right?”

“Yep. When your life is in danger, your body reacts faster than your brain can keep up. I do agree that we as living beings need this mechanism.”

“What was it…Ah, right.” The wise Ayase-san reached a conclusion before I could even fully explain it.

However, I still decided to follow through.

“Basically, it’s like a macro or a short-cut key in an app.” I said, and Ayase-san giggled.

“What an interesting example.”

“It’s easy to understand, so I like to use it. But, sometimes there are cases where even the macro can’t do anything. If you’re not aware of that fundamental logic, you can’t add a new one.”

“Right.”

“‘I just accidentally did that’—has an aspect to it that can’t be helped, I think. I’m sure that there’s something to gain even from a reflexive action.”

“But, prejudice gives birth to discrimination, right?”

“Then just fix your view? You reflected on your own actions. This being the case, I don’t think you need to worry about it any more than that. I feel like you’ll be able to become a person who can learn from these reflexive actions, and improve.” I said with a light tone, and a smile.

Only now did I realize that Ayase-san wasn’t walking next to me anymore. I turned around, to see her feet frozen to the ground three steps behind me.

“Ayase-san?”

Since she had her face cast downwards, I grew a bit worried, and called out to her.

“Asamura-kun, you…” Her voice was about to vanish in the pouring rain. “—You understand me too well.”

So…she said? She raised her head, and practically ran past me, not even giving me a glance as she did. She walked through the gate, inside the school, and quickly vanished out of my sight.

“What’s wrong, Asamura?” Until Maru tapped me on the shoulder, I stood still, just gazing at the direction she walked into.

The shoulder he tapped me on was oddly cold, drenched even. Even so, my mind was only filled with Ayase-san’s back that I had seen right before she disappeared.

Even as the final chime rang, the rain hadn’t stopped. Today is Wednesday, a day where I have to work. Hence, I would have to return home once, and then make my way to the bookstore in front of the train station. Doing that in the rain makes it multiple times more annoying. Maybe I should have brought the uniform to school, and head there directly.

I gazed outside the window, admiring the pouring rain. Of course, I don’t necessarily dislike the June rain like this. All the scents during the rain make it feel like summer after all. It’s just, on rainy days, I’d rather not have too much baggage with me. That being the case, the uniform from work I always take home with me, as it’s our policy that you wash it yourself when it’s dirty, I left it at home.

I could see the shoe lockers ahead of me. As I made my way there, my gaze subconsciously moved left and right. When I realized my own actions, I shook my head. No no no, there’s no way she’d be standing here again. She had an umbrella with her today.

“She probably went home already.” I said, and opened up the large umbrella in my hands.

The large black circle filled the area in front of me, blocking off everything. I put it on my shoulder, and stepped outside. Of course, there’s the part of it raining ever since early morning, but I also wanted to bring another umbrella with me than yesterday, so that people who happened to see her with that umbrella wouldn’t get the wrong idea. Maybe I don’t need to be that worried after all, we’re siblings in the end.

That being said, not even a week has passed since. Although, I do feel like I’m starting to understand Ayase-san a lot more. But, her words from this morning are still stuck in my head. With the rain pouring on the umbrella, I couldn’t focus on my thoughts at all.

Shortly after, I made it back to the flat, and entered my home. Once inside, the obnoxious sounds of the rain swiftly vanished. I put down the umbrella to dry, and sighed. Although my body cooled down quite a bit, I didn’t have time to take a bath. I had to make my way to work after all. Hence I headed to my room, passing Ayase-san’s room in the process.

I didn’t mean to peek inside, but since the door was opened ever so slightly, I could check out the situation inside. Room-drying colored underwear and clothes were defenselessly scattered on the bed. I guess that makes sense during the rain. I’d normally throw everything together and let it dry, but depending on the clothes, they can be damaged through that, so there’s people who dry them like this.

That being said, to think I’d actually come to see such scenery in my own home. I can’t keep looking at this, right. Since the laundry is drying, it’s apparent that Ayase-san has come home, and it’d be hell if she saw me like this.

“Asamura-kun? You’re home, huh.”

“Eeek!”

A voice spoke up behind me, making me straighten my back in shock. I turned around.

“What’s wrong?”

“N-Nothing at all.”

“Really, alright then.” Ayase-san gave me a dubious stare.

“I-I got my part-time work so I’ll be going now.” I lightly waved my hand, and headed to my own room.

I still felt Ayase-san’s sharp gaze glued to my back, but I didn’t have the guts to turn around. I felt like an underwear thief for some reason, even though I just happened to spot it in the corner of my eye, and she herself said that underwear after the laundry trip is like a handkerchief, so I don’t need to feel any guilt with that…right?

I stuffed the uniform of my part-time work into my bag, stormed out of the house, and during the entire time I headed to my part-time work, not even the sounds of the rain drowned out my heart’s pumping.

I planned to immerse myself in my work. I wanted to remove all my memories from the previous incident. Especially that blue fabric I saw. I put on my uniform, added the name plate, and started working. Today, I was busy with organizing the inventory. We received some new novels that were released the other day, and they need to be put on the shelves, exchanged with those that didn’t sell.

Tomorrow’s Friday, and we get a great delivery of books, so we need to have everything prepared for the new deliveries as well. Basically, I need to keep the shelves open more than usual. Although we get rough predictions of how much a book will sell from the publisher, there’s no way to accurately pin-point the behaviour of the customers themselves. As a result of that, you almost never fully sell out the books that come in. Next time either. There’s always books who stay as left-overs.

Ah, just like this one…When I was checking the light novel corner, I picked up a single volume. I was interested in that ever since it came into stock. I don’t think it aimed to become a harem-type romcom, but there’s a solid 48 girls on the cover, so I guess it turned out as one in the end. I think you got lost in your search for originality, dear author.

Even if the publisher and author assume that it will become a hit, there’s still a chance that it won’t sell at all. Many customers tend to be very conservative. I put that novel into a different pile, and continued with the sorting.

“You’re storing them for yourself again~” When I turned around, Yomiuri-senpai stood there. “They’ll just buy them back then, so as long as we can make some earnings, it should be fine—is probably what they thought as they stored them.”

As a chain bookstore, it’s been a trend like that, and yet I still don’t think they’d buy such niche books. I mean, I like them so it’s fine.

“Maybe it’s just that there’s people who buy these new releases every single month~”

“I wonder if someone like that exists.”

Yomiuri-senpai looked at me with a grin. Eh, are you talking about me?

“Hehe. More importantly, Junior-kun, aren’t you quite passionate about your work?”

“Can you not make it sound like I normally slack off the entire time? I’m working like always.”

“Really?”

“Am I acting weird or something?”

“I just happened to see a young man focus his everything on the work, so I wondered if something might have happened, I guess?”

“You sound like some far-away onlooker.”

“That sounds nice. I want to become like a stranger. That would mean I could forget about all the troubles in this world, sigh.”

When you sigh like that, I can’t help but feel more curious, you know that.

“What about you, Senpai? Did something happen?”

“Interested?”

“If there’s something that could get me interested, maybe.”

“Great response~ That’s what I like about you~”

“Again, can you not say things that invite misunderstandings?”

It’s really not fair to smile at me while you say that.

“I’m fine right now. Just knowing that you care is enough salvation~”

“Is that how it works?”

“That’s how it works. That’s also why.”

“Yes?”

“Take care of your cute little sister.”

“Ueh!?”

“If you made her angry, buy her something sweet on the way home.”

“I-I didn’t make her angry though.”

Not yet at least.

“Then, what did you do?”

“Nothing at all.”

“Nutting at all? That’s pretty extreme.”

“Listen here, we had the same dirty joke before, let’s not waste more pages on that…”

“Ahaha. Well, you can’t ignore her feelings, so if you don’t take care of it now, it might explode later.”

“Ugh…”

Since I couldn’t say anything else, I just quickly walked away to focus on my work again, seen off by Yomiuri-senpai’s grin.

“That person is just…Phew…” I faced the shelves again, as I muttered.

Even during such simple work like I’m doing now, you need to properly deal with any customer requests should there be any. As long as you wear the uniform of the bookstore here, customers will always come ask you for assistance. Most of them ask for the location of a book, which sounds simple enough, but they tend to do so without even looking into it themselves first. They don’t give you publisher, nor author, keep the genre vague, and yet ask you to pull it out of your sleeve.

Even if you tell me something like — It’s a series where a lot of murders happen, I can’t tell With that little information, I can’t find the right thing no matter how earnest I might be willing to help. Rather than not being able to find it specifically, I find too many. Don’t you have any more…hints?

A cat resolves the case.

A cat does?

I went to ask Yomiuri-senpai for help, and she immediately guided the customer to the right book.

“This one’s pretty popular. It’s weird for you to not know about it.”

“Is that so?”

Mystery is actually outside my type of genre.

“I would have been lost if they said it was a dog though.”

“Is there something like that?”

“Of course, something like this.”

Wow, hats off to you, mystery author.

You get the gist. Taking care of pre-orders for new releases, extras of the magazine missing, or just children being lost inside the store, there’s a lot to do as an employee. Doing my work like that, my shift already ended. I changed my clothes, gave my farewell to Senpai, and left the store behind me.

The rain had finally stopped, and thanks to the clear sky, I could see the moon between the valley of the buildings. Depending on the season, the way you see the moon is different. During the summer, when the sun stands tall, the full moon is staying low, and in the winter it’s the opposite. Since we’re in the summer solstice, the full moon doesn’t stand that tall, making it look like it got squished between the buildings.

There was still some heat left in the air, but the cool breeze felt great. As I was walking along the street, the phone in my back pocket vibrated. When I took it out, I saw that I received a new LINE message. I didn’t even have to swipe to tell that it was from Ayase-san. It was her first message towards me.

‘You saw it, right.’

I thought my heart stopped for a second. That was the worst possible one sentence to receive. I could tell what she was talking about even without any more context. I booted up the app, and confirmed the rest of the message. To sum it up, it would be as follows.

She was wondering what I could have done in front of her room, and eventually came to the assumption that I might have been looking at the underwear inside her room. She does think of the underwear as a handkerchief after it went through laundry, but since I was the target of that embarrassment this time, she wants to confirm the meaning of me seeing it—It seems.

Before the approaching interrogation and possible torture, I sent her a short message explaining myself, and hurried home. Seeing only her shoes at the entrance, I sighed in relief at the fact that our parents haven’t come home yet. When I raised my head again, I saw Ayase-san looking down at me.

“I’m back, Ayase-san.”

“Welcome back, Asamura-kun.”

Even though we were saying the same thing, the intonation was absolutely different from before.

“Don’t just freeze up at the entrance.”

“Ah, yeah…”

I did tell her an excuse, but I wonder if she’ll even believe me…

“Go back to the room first.”

“Eh? Which room?”

“Are you still interested in my room?”

“I will be on stand-by in my own room, thank you very much.”

At a time like this, it’d be best to not argue back, surely. I went to my room, put down my back, and sat down on the floor, waiting for Ayase-san.

“Why are you sitting on the floor like that?”

“Well, I just felt like doing it.”

I couldn’t tell her that I was in preparation to prostrate myself. I don’t know if she’d forgive me then.

“Here.”

I raised my head, only to see a steaming cup in front of me.

“Eh?”

“Hot chocolate. I’ll take it if you don’t want it though.”

“N-No, I’ll…take it…” I said, and accepted the cup.

I do prefer coffee, but I’m happy about something warm now—Wait, is this what I think it is? I looked up at Ayase-san’s face, and as expected, her eyes were fuming with anger.

“So…about what you texted me.”

“Ah, yeah.”

“The door happened to be half open, and your eyes got pulled towards what’s inside. Then, when I called out to you, you ran away, huh.”

“That’s about it.”

“Because it could look like you were about to go inside to steal something?”

“Well…I…guess…”

“Even though they’re your little sister’s?”

“That is true, but…” My words got stuck in my throat.

If this was about my real little sister or mother, then it’d be embarrassing, but that would be about it. However in this case…it couldn’t be helped. This is only the 5th day since we’ve become siblings—The second that excuse came up inside my head, her expression relaxed a bit.

“Sorry, that just now was a bit unfair.”

“Eh.”

“By law, we are siblings, but that doesn’t mean you can’t suddenly act like a real older brother the second the law comes into play—At least not in your head.”

“…Yeah, I get where you’re coming from.”

The two of us are living under the same roof, and at the very least act like siblings, as a family. It is expected from us that we do that, and we cannot betray these expectations, nor do we have any plans of doing so. Because that would trouble my old man and Akiko-san. That being said, we can’t act like siblings who’ve lived together for all of their 16 years. A human’s thought process isn’t some code that can be edited, or a program that can be rewritten.

It’s a fact that we’ve been total strangers a week ago. Now, Ayase-san is saying that it’s necessary for me to become aware of that. She always tries to be fair after all.

“But, now we’re even. Let’s just forget about this, alright?”

“Even?”

“I think that being entranced by my underwear was another type of reflexive action. This morning, I reflexively said those words. That’s why, I’d say we’re even. I think you’re the type of person who can learn from these reflexive actions as well, just as you can believe that I can.”

“I’m happy to hear that.”

“By the way.”

Hm?

“You’re basically saying that my underwear was alluring enough to completely charm you, right.”

“I never said that, no.”

“Then, it’s not alluring at all…is it. Huh.”

“…Are you teasing me by any chance?”

“Now, who knows. But, I can’t exactly leave this restless atmosphere going, right?”

“I…guess.”

“You…definitely hold a certain desire towards possessing some of my underwear, right?”

“Urk…Well, honestly speaking, it’d be a lie if I said I didn’t have any carnal desires like that…But, I’m not going to do anything just because of that, okay?

“Hmm…So you actually have desires.”

“It’d be pretty troublesome if I didn’t. But, having them, and acting according to them is different.” I said with as serious of an expression as I could.

“Pfft. That’s right, I’m sorry for teasing you. Let’s just leave it at that for now.”

“Thank you very much…”

I gave her my honest thanks, and figured out just what she was trying to say. You can’t undo an emotion you once had. Even if that was just a misunderstanding. Her anger at me having seen her underwear doesn’t vanish. Instead of throwing this emotion at me, she instead explained as to why she was angry, and remained calm. What amazing anger control that is. Adjusting, huh…I’m still far from reaching her level.

“But, I’m glad.”

“Hm?”

“I didn’t want you to think that the design was weird. I might have needed to throw it away then.”

“…I feel like I’m starting to understand what kind of personality you have, Ayase-san.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, a bit.”

Listening to my words, Ayase-san showed a faint smile.

1 Made from fish and kelp, very traditionally Japanese

2 Type of sweet rice wine