A faint metallic sound remained in my ears, but it took me a few seconds to realize this was the sound of the door closing. I slowly opened my eyes and checked the clock next to my pillow⦠8:54 am. Almost nine, huh? Well, itâs Sunday, so I can just take my⦠Wait, I canât take my time! Iâve got a shift starting at 10 am. I completely overslept! The instant that realization hit, I threw the blanket off me, which caused cold air to hit my body, sending a shiver down my back. I wanted to reach for the AC remote, but even those few seconds I desperately needed.
âHuuup!â I gathered energy from my outburst and took off my clothes.
Normally, Iâd wait for my room to warm up a bit before changing, but if I do that today, Iâll end up running late for sure. If everything goes according to my calculations, I should get there 15 minutes before my shift starts. Assuming I run all the way, of course. In my head, I drew my course of action to make it in time, matching the time reflected on my digital clock in the corner of my eyes, moving my arms and hands in unison. I didnât even have time to think of a proper outfit for the day, and I just went with a matching set of clothes to save myself time.
I stuffed my accessories into my sports bagâbecause I could still put them on at workâand ran to the bathroom. I brushed my teeth at the speed of light and checked my hair. Yep, no bed hair in sight. But seriously, this just makes me want to have a large mirror in my room! Anyway, I washed my face and checked the scent of my skin. If I donât like it, I usually add some deodorant alongside my perfume, but I donât have time right now. Iâm looking fresh, too. Probably because I slept so soundly⦠Too soundly, you could say. I think Yomiuri-san said she needed moisturizer when she began attending university.
I went back to my room to check if I had my phone, wallet, and everything else I needed and put on my coat. To guarantee higher speed, I stuffed my scarf and gloves into my bag and dashed out of my room.
âSaki-chan.â
A voice called out to me so I turned around. My stepdad jingled his car keys around his fingers and stood up from the sofa.
âIâll drive you there.â
I wanted to decline with the reason that my blunder of oversleeping shouldnât trouble other people, but I swallowed those words.
âUm⦠Thanks, thatâd be a huge help.â
âNo problem,â he gave me a happy smile, which made my chest hurt.
While rushing to the flatâs parking lot with him, I started thinking to myself. Itâs not like my blood-related father is the only person who could ever be my father, but looking at the categories inside my head, Asamura Taichi had only been âMomâs husbandâ until a short while ago. And it was the same for Asamura Yuuta. We were simply living together, nothing more. However, when we went to visit the Asamura Family over New Yearâs, both stepdad and Asamura-kun worked their hardest so that Mom and I could fit in with our relatives. They acted as pillars for that.
And because that happened, I wanted to do the same for both of them in case they went through something similar. Basically, I wanted us to be a family. Heâs a stranger no longer. Taichi-san is my stepdad. And while thinking about this, I slid into his car.
âDid you put on your seatbelt?
Oh, yeah. He asked the same thing during New Yearâs. I panicked and tried to put it on but it got stuck.
âI-I did.â
âGood, then letâs roll. I can just drop you off in front of the bookstore, right?â
âYes.â
The car accelerated, and I was pressed into the seat. When walking this way, itâd usually take me more than ten minutes, but thanks to this, weâll be there in no more than five. This should be easy.
âThanks again.â
âIâm going to pick up Akiko-san after this, so I might as well.â
âAh, is Mom out shopping?â
âYeah. Thatâs why I figured I could use this as a chance to show off how good of a father I am.â
Heâs going out of his way to say that so that I donât need to feel bad about this. Heâs such a kind person. Mom really managed to land a good catch with him.
âEven so⦠Thank you, this is a huge help.â
Heâs someone that Mom can rely on. And if I had to guess, the same goes for him. That doesnât mean youâre completely in your familyâs care, and more that they trust each other. I think Asamura-kun said something about this before⦠about properly relying on others. Until now, Iâve always actively tried to avoid doing so⦠but itâs been half a year since then.
We were quickly moving away from the flat we live in. Thatâs where Mom and I moved to. And the advice came from his senior at work, all for me. It all began with Yomiuri-san.
âItâs fine, weâll make it in time.â
âAh⦠Yes.â I gently rubbed my cheeks.
Iâm about to start my shift, which is a job that involves me having to deal with customer requests. I canât look stiff in front of them. And if I had to guess, I was looking tense right about now.
âI was just⦠remembering some bad memories.â
Stepdad looked at me and tilted his head. Iâm sorry for giving such a weird response.
âWell⦠you seem very passionate about your studies. Youâre staying up late every day, right?â
He wanted to clear the awkwardness in the air and had changed the topic, I guess.
âUm, well⦠I was getting a bit engrossed with English conversations.â
âConversations? Are you struggling with them?â
âNot exactlyâ¦â I gave him a bitter smile. âI wouldnât call myself proficient, but I think Iâm doing all right. Itâs just⦠weâre heading to Singapore next week, soâ¦â
âAh, your field trip is right around the corner, isnât it?â
I nodded.
âAnd⦠Itâs also for my entrance exams. However, the reason I want to focus on it right now is that Iâd like to be able to speak it as well as possible when Iâm over there. Iâve been practicing my listening skills for some time now, itâs justâ¦â
Stepdad listened to the end and nodded.
âActual talking skills arenât something you can just acquire by studying day in and out, after all.â
âYes, thatâs true.â
âBut⦠isnât that good enough? Youâre not just studying for your entrance exams, after all. The vocabulary and language are used to communicate, so the motive of wanting to converse with the locals is admirable if you ask me.â
Iâm not used to being praised upfront like this, so it made me feel rather bashful.
âI would have preferred to improve a bit more, though.â
âI mean, the field trip isnât as big of a deadline as the entrance exams will be, so itâs fine if you use this as a test run.â
âThatâs true.â
âJust donât overdo it. Akiko-san will worry too much if you donât get proper sleep.â He told me with a worried tone, so I nodded along resolutely.
And at the same time, the car stopped. We had reached the building with the bookstore.
âHave a good shift.â
âThank you⦠Oh, yeah. I put chocolate in the fridge. Itâs addressed to you, so you should be able to tell which one it is.â
Seeing Stepdadâs happy smile when I closed the door once again gave me the resolution to treasure this family of mine.
Work passed surprisingly quickly, and it was time for me to head home. I went to the office and informed the manager that I was leaving, and he praised me with âGood work. You did a great job today.â Itâs probably because I worked extra hard since I almost arrived late. But since I didnât expect these words, I was a bit surprised.
I replayed his words in my head while changing in the changing room, making me realize that Iâd been getting a lot of praise today, especially from my elders. And to think that it was all for areas that I wasnât even consciously working towards. That reminds me, someone during my shift was handing out obligatory chocolate, and yet I didnât have any interest in that stuff and never saw it as necessary. But thinking back on it, the manager never saw me as just Asamura-kunâs little sister, and had called me âAyase.â
I regretted not giving him some chocolate as a token of my gratitude. And at the same time, I was baffled to find myself thinking about this stuff. Iâve always assumed I would never be concerned about my gratitude and feelings towards other people, and yetâI was about to leave the changing room, but right when I was gonna open the door, Yomiuri-san walked in.
âOh! You actually were here already. We almost missed each other by a second.â
âGood mor⦠No, good evening, Yomiuri-senpai.â
âMy apologies, dear Phelps-chan.â
âHuh?â
âI wonât force you to head out for mission impossible, so can we just go back to our regular âGood eveningâ?â
I had no clue what all that was about, but since she clapped her hands together in prayer, I had trouble declining.
âAh, sure. Good evening.â
âAre you on your way home right now?â
She stepped past me to enter the changing room, only to beckon me inside once again. She had a large department store bag hanging down her shoulder, and she took out two small bags.
âHere, Iâm sharing the goods. Iâve got some candy. Got any preferences?â
âHow are they different?â
âThese ones are sweet. And these are spicy.â
â¦Spicy candy?
âTheyâre red pepper candy. I got them from a friend who came back from a trip.â
Ahh. Thatâs why she said âSharing the goodsâ earlier. Still, I understand the idea behind salty candy (which is actually sweet), but red pepper candy is just⦠spicy, no?
âDonât sweat the small stuff. Itâs an interesting bunch, so go get âem! One time I got durian candy, you know?â
The one with the pungent smell?
âExactly. And it wasnât even that fruity sweetness youâd expect. It was more like the scent was packed inside the candy itself. Just eating one made my tongue go numb from the bitterness!â
ââ¦Iâll take the red pepper candy, thanks.â
Iâll let someone else take the sweet candy. And Iâm a bit interested in the idea of spicy candy, myself.
âHere you go. All right, thatâs all done. Now I wonât be on the receiving end of your jealousy for giving your older brother chocolate.â
âI wouldnât act that way.â
Who would get jealous over that? Also⦠I see. Sheâs gonna give Asamura-kun some chocolate later? I guess that makes sense, since theyâre colleagues. Yup, nothing wrong with that.
âAnyway⦠Iâll be heading out, then.â
âOh, one more thing! Youâre away on your field trip next week, right? Iâm so jelly! Have lots of fun for me, too, okay?â
âThank you very much. Iâll do that.â
I stepped out of the room, only to then realize something. Did I⦠ever mention that we had a field trip next week? While walking through the front store, I snuck a glance at Asamura-kun. I imagine she must have heard it from him. And heâs gonna be on a shift with her right after thisâ¦
Today is February 14th, which means I got to see lots of couples walking around Shibuya and its vicinity. They must be all out on Valentineâs dates, Iâd imagine. Well, Maaya would probably say something like âIf you wanna go on dates, do that on Saturday!â but I guess thatâs not necessarily the case. I see lots of couples, in fact. Upon arriving home, Stepdad and Mom were eating dinner together. I hadnât seen that in a while.
âThanks for the chocolate. It was delicious,â Stepdad said and thanked me as he spotted me entering.
That comment earned him an exasperated sigh from Mom, probably because he ate all of her chocolate cake, too. Maybe I should have given him something else with fewer calories. And while eating the white stew from this afternoon that Mom heated up for me, my thoughts once again drifted towards Asamura-kun and Yomiuri-san, wondering what they were doing right now. And then I realized that I⦠didnât like the fact that the two of them were together right now. Was I always this greedy and selfish of a person?
This emotion continued to stay somewhere deep within my heart, even after I moved to my room to study, so I couldnât focus at all. I shook my head left and right. I canât keep going like this.
âI should study somewhere else,â I said out loud, grabbing my study items and leaving my room.
After moving to the living room, I restarted. I put my earphones in, trying to clear my head from any unnecessary thoughts, and instead focused on English. I placed a few English texts in front of me while listening to a recording of them at the same time. I wanted to try to understand what I heard without relying on the transcript. In other words, I wasnât going with a direct translation but instead attempted to understand the English I heard with my own English. After all, people who speak English donât take the extra step of translation inside their heads.
However, saying is easy; doing is hard⦠Wait, no. That was too Japanese again. Letâs seeâ¦Â Easier said than done, was it? I have to rephrase what I hear in English⦠But I donât feel like Iâm doing that at all. English conversations are so complicatedâ¦
âI mean, the field trip isnât as big of a deadline as the entrance exams will be, so itâs fine if you use this as a test run.â
I remembered what Stepdad said, replaying his words in my mind. Language and words are there to be used for communication. To understand the thoughts and feelings of someone else, as well as to express those things to someone else. Itâll become an important part of my future, not just for exams. Just doing what I can isnât good enough. And finally, I started to think more and more in English, as the Japanese vocabulary disappeared from my mind. And yet, my heart was in such disarray that I didnât even notice that the door to the living room had opened.
I raised my head and uttered the first thing that came to mind. The fact that it turned out to be Japanese is probably an indication that your mother tongue will always be stronger than any secondary language acquired.
âWelcome back.â
Standing in front of me was Asamura-kun with a sports bag hanging down his shoulder. He must have just gotten home from work. I took out my earphones and stood up. While doing so, I glanced at the time on my phone⦠Oh, itâs pretty early. If I had to guess, Asamura-kun probably came home right after his shift ended.
âWould you like to eat dinner?â
He nodded in response, so I began preparing everything. Thankfully, Stepdad didnât eat much of the white stew, so there was plenty left for Asamura-kun. He went to his room, only to turn around and return to the kitchen. Without a word, he opened the fridge and was about to place something from his bag inside it. I happened to catch a glance of it and called out to him.
âThatâ¦â My gaze was glued to his hands.
Needless to say, he was holding chocolate. It must be from Yomiuri-san. She made it obvious that she would give him some. Meanwhile, Asamura-kun wasnât too flustered. He just stated what I expected, showing me the chocolate he received. However, the package looked oddly familiar.
âAh.â
It was a popular brand of chocolate where even one small piece was expensive enough to buy a whole sweet bread slice. As a high school student, itâs not something I could afford to buy just to hand over as obligatory chocolate. Without really meaning to, I asked âThis is obligatory chocolate, right?â only to immediately feel embarrassed at myself. Itâs not just that I wanted to make sure, but even more so that I was doubtful if I could even forgive any other answer than that. I had no idea I could be this narrow-minded. And to finish it off, Yomiuri-sanâs face popped up in the back of my head.
âWith this, I wonât be on the receiving end of your jealousy for giving your older brother chocolate.â
This is just as she predicted it. I opted to cut our conversation there and focus on preparing his food for him. Other than the main white stew, we had seaweed, as well as other boiled vegetables from the fridge. Itâs pretty late, so anything lighter thatâs easier on his stomach should be better here. Stepdad didnât eat much because he had Momâs cake and my chocolate, so thereâs even some dessert left over for him. And⦠thereâs the red box inside the fridge. The chocolate. After I put all the food on the table and Asamura-kun thanked me, I ran my mouth again.
âJust give me a moment, thereâs one more thing.â
He tilted his head in confusion as I placed a red bottle in front of him.
âThe dessertâs gonna be sweet, so I figured a bit of spice would mix in better,â I added as a miserable excuse. âYou can just use it as you see fit. Anyway, Iâll go back to studying,â I said, almost sounding like I wanted to escape, and returned to my room with all my studying items.
Sitting down at my desk, I held my head in despair.
âGod⦠Iâm so pathetic.â
In front of me was the small wrapped candy Yomiuri-san had given me. I took it out of the plastic and stuffed it into my mouth.
âMgh, spicy!â
Really⦠just what am I doing?