Chapter 108: Powerless

ARIEL

I pull my motorcycle up to a stop in front of the wreckage.

Marius bursts out of the driver’s side, his face bruised and bloodied.

He points frantically to the vehicle. “Need—help—”

I run with him to the passenger side of the vehicle and try the handle.

The roof of the car has caved in, and there’s no telling the damage inside…

But the door won’t budge.

It’s ~Amy~ in there. I should be losing my head—crying and screaming in pain and worry.

But I feel my warrior training kick into gear as my body responds to the crisis at hand without missing a beat.

“Shift your limbs,” I say.

Marius follows my command, and I shift with him. We might not have as much dexterity in this form, but there’s no way we’d have enough strength while fully human.

I keep my hands in human form so that I can grasp the doors, but now I have the strength of my wolf in my arms as I pull alongside Marius.

It does the trick.

Marius and I manage to pry open Amy’s door.

She’s unconscious. And there’s blood—a lot of it.

We try to pull her out. Her arm is caught, and Marius has to punch at the roof with his shifted paw before she’s finally freed from the smoking vehicle.

Carefully, we lift her together and carry her a safe distance away from the car.

The weight of Amy unconscious in my arms brings home the significance of this moment for the first time.

As I was struggling to free her from the crushed car, my adrenaline didn’t allow me a moment to think.

But now that I’m laying her down on the side of the road, it really hits me: I could lose her.

I look into Marius’s bloodied face and realize he’s expecting me to heal his mate.

~I have to try…~

I place my hands on Amy’s chest.

I try to heal her.

I have to heal her.

This can’t be it for Amy.

It can’t be.

Just as when I tried to heal the cut on my thumb, I feel nothing.

There’s no familiar surge of energy flowing through my fingertips. The only thing flowing is Amy’s blood, out of her body.

But I don’t stop here. This is Amy. I don’t care what I have to do to save her, I’ll do it. I’ll make it happen. I can’t imagine living with myself if she dies.

~It’ll be my fault—I gave up my gift.~

I reach out to the Moon Goddess with my mind, praying for mercy.

~“Selene…”~

~“Please restore in me the ability to heal, just this once.”~

~“If you won’t help me, at least spare Amy.”~

~“Please, Selene.”~

But there’s no response. Not a whisper on the breeze. Nothing.

Cars continue to whiz by us on the highway, and I’m reminded that time is passing while Amy’s life is slipping away. I look at Marius.

“I can’t do it,” I say. “I’m sorry.”

“What?” he says. “What do you mean you can’t do it?”

“I mean, I’m trying and failing!”

“Well, try harder, dammit!”

He drops to his knees and begins to pray to the Moon Goddess.

~That won’t work now…~

“Call an ambulance!” I say, trying to snap him back to reality. “Quickly!”

Finally, seeming to take in the sincerity in my voice, he fumbles with his phone but drops it in his franticness.

I reach out to dial for him, but what I see makes me freeze.

Marius manages to dial the number as I stare at both my hands, covered in Amy’s warm blood.

***

Alex and I sit in the waiting room at the hospital.

I’ve been in this room so many times, and the feeling is always the same.

~Uncertainty.~

It’s fast becoming my least favorite feeling. To be on the edge of big news and not know whether Fate will swing her pendulum left or right is maddening.

Marius has just been called in to speak with the doctor privately, and Alex and I are waiting for him to return with news.

~Good? Bad? We don’t know.~

In this room, five minutes feels like five hours.

I’m tapping my fingers uncontrollably, nervous energy taking any opportunity to spill over. Alex places his hand on mine.

I still my fingers, but my heart won’t stop racing.

A door swings open, and Marius makes his way toward us. Beneath his bandaged face, his expression is heavy.

~Are those bruises, or has he been crying?~

He just shakes his head when he reaches us.

My breath catches as I wait for him to find the words.

“The doctor says… They’ve induced a coma. Put her on life support. But the trauma was bad. They don’t expect her to make it.”

When the words are out, Marius collapses onto the chair next to me, and tears spill silently from his bruised eyes.

I leap from my seat without thinking and rush through the swinging doors.

I find Amy’s room almost immediately and approach her bed.

She looks a little beat-up, but not on the edge of death. She still looks like herself—just asleep.

Tears stream down my face as I place my hands on her chest one more time.

I try again, and again there’s no response.

“Please, Goddess,” I say out loud. “What do I have to do?”

My voice rises as I continue attempting to bring Amy back. “I’ll do anything. I’m begging you… Just tell me!”

Alex enters the room behind me and wraps his arms around me.

I begin sobbing as he attempts to gently coax me away from Amy’s bed.

I know I’ve failed. I’ve never felt so weak in my life. I don’t know what to do, and my mind begins spiraling out of control as Alex pulls me away from Amy.

“Enough, Ariel,” he says. “You’ve done all you can for now.”

“What h-h-have I done?” I say through my tears. “What have I done besides giving up my gift… My friend…”

“Shhh, come on,” he says. “Let me take you home.”

I allow Alex to guide me out into the hallway. I hiccup, trying to stop sobbing before we reach the waiting room.

I imagine Marius is still there, and I don’t want him to see me this way.

~It’s hard enough for him already…~

That’s twice that I’ve failed to heal his mate now.

I have to find a way to protect Amy—and all my loved ones—without my healing gift.

I know I can’t trust the Moon Goddess. And I know I can’t trust Fate.

But maybe I don’t have to trust them… Maybe they’ll still spare my family and friends. Maybe they’ll spare Amy.

~Maybe it’s enough just to give them what they want…~

Since Selene won’t answer my prayers, I’m forced to turn back to Fate.

She began targeting my family and friends because I refused to bend to her will.

Fate isn’t like her sister. She doesn’t need to be loved and trusted like a friend. All she seems to want is power.

~What if I gave in to Fate?~

Alex squeezes my hand as he leads me out of the hospital, and I remember what it means to give in to Fate.

She wants me to mate with Xavier.

I turn to Marius, who’s walking on my other side.

“Don’t give up,” I say. “I don’t know how, but…I’ll find a way to restore my connection to the Moon Goddess. I’ll save Amy before…before—”

Marius stops me short, grabbing my arm as I speak.

Alex and I turn to him.

Marius has stopped walking as if suddenly frozen in place. He has a wild expression on his face.

He’s a man who’s almost lost his mate, and at first I wonder if he’s going through some type of shock.

I look at Alex, who seems just as bewildered as I am.

I turn back to Marius as he tries to speak: “It’s just—Ariel—why didn’t I think of it before—I think—maybe…”

He reminds me of a young child with an idea so big he just has to get it all out at once.

The jumble of words means nothing to me, but he has managed to communicate his excitement and, dare I say it, ~hope~?

“Buddy,” Alex says, putting a hand on Marius’s shoulder. “We want to understand you, but you have to slow down.”

Marius seems to understand this. He takes several deep breaths and then speaks slower this time, though his voice is still shaking.

“Your healing powers aren’t working because you’ve been disconnected from the Moon Goddess, yes?”

“Yes. I was actually the one who—”

“Don’t worry about it,” he says, seemingly impatient to continue. “You just need to repair your connection, and then you can heal Amy.”

I’m disappointed. I thought he might have been onto something, but now I think he might be losing his grip.

“Yeah, but I’ve been trying—” I say.

“If a severed connection to the Goddess is the problem,” Marius says. “I think I know ~exactly~ where we can go to repair that.”

My heart leaps into my throat.

“Where do I need to go?” I say. “Just tell me.”

I’ll do anything it takes to save Amy. I just need direction. I’m at the end of my rope, and at this point, I’ll grasp at anything.

“The Scripture Pack,” Marius says. “To our holiest place. There’s a temple there where many have claimed to find commune with the divine, no matter how grave their sins…”

~I’ve completely renounced the Goddess…~

~Even if I'm willing to give Selene a second chance...~

My heart thumps so hard my head hums, and my throat constricts around the question:

~Will she give me one?~