Chapter 20: Chapter Seventeen ➳ Falling For Her

Shaurya

Oh, God. I'm here.

The hospital looks at me hauntingly, reviving the memories from last night. How Anika's father taunted me pretentiously and with no shame. How I felt my insides squeezing with fear. How I got scared and ran away, being the same old person I am— running away from all my stupid problems.

My feet wobble as I get out of my Mercedes, feeling my heart race under my chest. Why am I so nervous to meet her? It's not like I like her or anything.

Shaurya, stop lying to yourself.

I shake my head, hoping that all my toxic thoughts would just fade away. Now is not the time to be thinking about possible romantic feelings for Anika!

Walking to the front door, I push it open and feel a cold rush of air. I shiver under my breath and wrap my arms around me. Damn me for not wearing a sweatshirt.

I go up to the reception desk and feel slightly relieved that Pauline, the receptionist who has serious relationship problems, isn't there. Instead, it's a young man with fiery red hair and boxy glasses, typing furiously into the computer.

Once I introduce myself to him and ask him for the patient that I'm supposed to pick up, he nods his head and dials in a number. He talks to the nurse on the line and ends the call shortly afterwards. "The nurse said Miss—" he looks on a piece of paper— "Desai will be down in two to three minutes."

I nod my head, grinning, feeling my heart rate gradually fasten. "Thank you."

He nods his head back and I go to sit down by the waiting room. Once I settle down, I grab a few magazines on the table beside me and delve into political and celebrity rumors of the daily.

Couple minutes later, I hear someone clear their throat. I look up from my magazine and see—

Oh.

"Hi," Anika breathes out. I feel my lips trembling with shock as I acknowledge Anika's body and attire. Before she looked so alive and full of life— but now she just looks so exhausted, with burns, cuts, and scars appealingly vividly on her face. There's a cut specifically on her lips, a bruise on her forehead, a tiny scar appearing across her neck, and another bruise on her cheekbone. I also notice that she's wearing a navy green sweatshirt and baggy grey sweatpants, as she attempts to cover up her other scars, and her hair is pulled into a loose, low ponytail.

"Hey," I clear my throat, standing up. "Wh-what happened?"

She thinks to herself, but eventually shrugs. "Nothing. Just fell down the stairs."

Just fell down the stairs...

She doesn't know that I know the true reason of her hospitalization.

I take a deep breath. "Oh. Well, I'm sorry to hear that. Hope you feel better."

"Thanks," she weakly smiles. Why is it so awkward between us? It's never been like this between Anika and I.

After a couple moments of awkward silence, she clears her throat and fidgets. "So uh s-should we get going?"

"Yeah!" I straighten myself. "Definitely." I start to walk forward as she follows along.

The sun is perched directly on top of us, beating on top of our foreheads. Weather in California can be really weird sometimes: one week it'd be sunny, beautiful weather, and jolly outside but the week after it'd be melancholy, gloomy, rainy, and cloudy weather that basically makes me want to crawl into a hole and die.

We reach the car and I open the door for her. She mumbles "thanks" and I close the door, rushing to my side of the car.

Once we get inside, she takes a deep breath and leans back, looking at her surroundings. "Nice car."

I chuckle. "Thanks."

She nods her head and starts to look out of the window. I can't help but stare at her shamelessly: even though she looks completely worn out and sulky— I still find her pretty and so wondrous. Her soft spoken eyes. Her full luscious lips. Her smile that makes me melt like a puddle.

Are you sure you don't like her, dumbass?

Sometimes I despise my inner voice.

I snap back to reality and drive onto the road. There seems to be an awkward atmosphere floating above us, something that creates silence between us. And it really bothers me— before, we talked as if there were no borders or anything prohibiting us from genuinely having a good time. Is it because Anika lied to me and didn't tell me why she was actually hospitalized? Is it because of her father? Did she secretly know what her father told me last night? Or worst of all— is she listening to her father and is now going to ignore me and basically think as if I don't exist in her world anymore? Or is it—

"I came yesterday."

Well, shit. Did I just say that out loud?!

"Wh...what?" Anika gulps. She looks at me as if a third head is suddenly growing out of my shoulder. "Y-you did?"

I take a deep breath and console myself. "Yeah. I did."

"Oh," she looks out at the window again and says, "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I didn't want to say anything... at that moment," I finish off. "It honestly didn't feel like the right thing to say at that moment."

"Then why did you?" She narrows her eyes at me. "You had no right to drop that bombshell on me, okay?"

"O-okay," I stutter. Why is she sounding so annoyed right now? My face warms up and I speak up again. "I'm sorry."

"Forget about it," she crosses her arms over her chest. "J-Just forget about it."

"No," I blurt out, gripping the steering wheel even tighter. I need to say what needs to be said. "I can't forget about it, Anika. I mean, you matter. You matter to the world, to your friends, and to me. Your life matters."

She leans closer to me, still looking annoyed. "What are you trying to say here?"

"What am I trying to say is..." I clench my jaw from stopping myself from yelling at her. Of all the girlfriends I've had, I've never yelled or abused them at all. I never had the guts to lash out on someone like that, especially a woman. It's not right for someone to do that, especially myself. "Is that I know the real reason why you were hospitalized, Anika."

"Why..." Anika looks at her feet and closes her eyes, slowly shaking her head. "Why didn't do you tell me?"

"Same answer as why I didn't tell you before I came to meet you."

She scoffs. "Is it really that big of a deal? I mean, I was just angry with what was going on. My father basically dragged me up the stairs, Shaurya. He abused me. Hit me. It wasn't pleasant," she spits out. He did... what?

"Why w-would he do that?" I mutter.

"I don't know, why don't you ask him?" She replies.

"Speaking of that, there's something else that I need to tell you."

"What is it this time?" Anika rolls her eyes. "My father talked to you and threatened you if you ever talked to me ever again?"

"Well... um, yeah."

She takes a deep breath. "Why? Why would he do that?" She mutters to herself.

I stare at the moving road as my feet presses against the accelerator. "Look, Anika. I don't know why exactly you're getting pissed at me. Isn't it enough that I told you the truth?"

"Who said I was pissed at you?" she narrows her eyes towards me, leaning towards me. "Everything's not about you, Shaurya."

"What is that supposed to mean?" I murmur.

"What I mean is," she huffs, "Is that you always think everything is fine, when it's truly not. And that's only because you have everything a person could ever wish for. Good looks, money, smartness..." Anika trails off, looking at me as if I'm a stranger. "It's not fair."

"I..." I gulp. "I don't know what to say. I mean, it's not like I rub it in your face, I'd never do that," I admit.

"I get that," she immediately replies. "But yeah, it's whatever. What did my father talk to you about?" she blurts out.

"Like I told you," I sigh, "He says that he will do terrible things to me if I ever talked to you again."

"On what level, though?" she questions.

"On a level that personally terrifies me, Anika," I look at her, furrowing my brows. "He lifted me off of the ground by his fist and held me by my collar," my voice trembles, as I look back on the road. "Even my own father doesn't threaten me like that."

"I'm... I'm sorry," she apologizes. "I had no idea."

"Yeah, it's fine," I brush it off. I then realize we have reached Anika's neighborhood. "Where from here?"

"Keep on going straight, make a left on the first left and make a right immediately after that."

"Gotcha."

I eventually reach Anika's house, the same place where I was last night. The same place where I saw her get hauled out of her house on a stretcher. The same place where I felt my world falling apart.

"Let me guess. You saw me getting hauled onto the stretcher?"

I raise my eyebrows at her as I park in front of her house. "Maybe..."

She looks at me and lightly chuckles.  "Damn." Her eyes fill with life, her bright teeth flashing at me. Why does she have to be so beautiful? I'm trying to stay mad at her here!

"Yeah," I wince. She starts to get out of the car and I immediately get out as well as I go to help her get out. I open the door for her and grab her by her hand. I feel her fingers wrapping tightly against my forearm, grabbing me for support. It fills me up, makes my body electrocute with life. "Here, I gotchu," I whisper to her.

She looks at me the entire time and closes the door behind her. "Thanks," she mutters, shyly placing a stray strand of hair behind her ear.

"Don't mention it," I grin.

She sighs and whispers, "I'm sorry for my behavior in the car. I guess I'm just not... really used to having someone care for me this much, so I reacted towards it in a harsh way." Her soft eyes look at me apologetically. "I'm so sorry, Shaurya." I see that her eyes are getting watery as her lips start to tremble.

"Oh, God, no. Please don't cry," I whisper. A tear falls from her eye as I envelope my arms around her. Her head lands on the square of my chest as I lean my head on top of hers. She smells fresh, like she just took a shower. She's perfect in her own way.

Of all the people that I've ever met, I feel the happiest with... her. I know it's only been a week or two or maybe even three since I have known her, but damn... I feel myself falling for her. Hard. More than Lexie, or more than any of my other ex girlfriends. She's all that's been on my mind lately, and part of me wants to just screw it and ask her out and ask her to be mine... but I know that I can't. Not yet anyways, because she just went through something treacherous and fearful, and I wouldn't ever want to shove myself into her 'list of problems' like that so selfishly.

Anika's arms wrap around me even tighter as I hear her sob, feeling her tears soak onto my shirt, but I don't care. I will always be there for her, no matter how hard she tries to push me away. She needs me, and I need her. And that is all.

It seems like only a few seconds, but after a couple minutes later she releases from me, quickly wiping her tears away. "Wow," she chuckles to herself. "I've never cried on someone like that before."

I laugh. "Well, you're welcome." She jokingly punches my chest and sighs. Anika looks up at me and purses her lips. "And you know what, Shaurya?"

"What?" I feel a smile growing on my lips.

She walks towards me and places her hand on my bicep. "I'll come to your party today."

*

A/N:

EEEEEEEK.

^Yes, that was basically how I felt while writing the end of this chapter.

Oh, Jesus...

^how I felt while writing the very awkward moment between Shaurya and Anika in the car.

And I know what you're thinking: What is Ruhi doing, publishing on a THURSDAY? Like, the HELL? And let me just tell you... today is the first day of thanksgiving break, so I just thought to myself that maybe I should BLESS you guys with another chapter. (you're welcome for the double update :))

So yes, I will be updating Sunday as well!!!

Also, how do you guys think Shaurya's beach party is going to go? Will it go bad? Good? Terrible? Wonderful? Dreadfully? Magnificently?

I could name more adjectives, but we'd be here forever lol.

Stay tuned for the next chapter ;)

-Ru <3