T R I S T A N
i opened the door and held back a curse.
"Look who's back. Zz..." I started. I obviously didn't know her name. I had no idea why I had even tried to say it.
"Zoey," she finished. "We've been through this already, and honestly, what else could it be if it starts with a Z?"
"I don't know, Zara?"
"That's a store."
"Pretty sure it can also be a girl's name," I said. It was raining outside, but I was yet to let her in. She was wearing an ugly knit sweater, so she would probably be fine. "Also, there's Zelda, Zuri, Zora, Z â"
"Sure," she stopped me, looking inside where it was warm enough that I could just wear a t-shirt. "Can I come in now? Please?"
I smiled and stepped aside. She walked in. Her sweater was too big for her. Her jeans looked fine. I followed her into the living room, where Sam's stupid cartoons were too loud for me to be able to even think. Most days I would prefer not to, but I had a headache today, so Sam would have to turn the sound down as soon as possible.
Zoey stopped so suddenly, I almost walked into her.
"Do you mind?" I asked. I could walk around her, but I just didn't want to. I thought that had to be a good enough reason. She turned around.
"Can I ask you something?"
"No."
"It's important," she said.
"To you."
"To everyone actually."
"Not to me."
"How do you know? I haven't even told you yet."
I grabbed her by the shoulders and moved her out of my way before suggesting we kept it that way. I really did have a headache and I just couldn't deal with her right now. It had started behind my eyes, but it seemed to have spread everywhere.
"Zoey?" Sam called from the living room. In a second, he was running towards her, jumping into her arms when she opened them for him. I thought she would fall on her ass and almost wished she did, but she kept her footing.
"It's good to see you too, Sammy," she said when she put him down, running her fingers through his blonde hair.
I rolled my eyes and watched them disappear upstairs. Guessed whatever Zoey wanted to ask me would have to wait and wished it waited forever and ever. Sam talked all the way up the stairs, through the hallway, and into his bedroom. Apparently, Zoey had kept her word and told Richard about the whole gym class fiasco and Richard had taken it up to the school board. Apparently, they had apologized.
Sam had told me this as soon as he got home today and was probably repeating it all to Zoey right this moment. At the time I hadn't managed to pay attention to the whole thing because Sam had been speaking too fast, and, at that point, my headache had just blown up in my temples, but I gathered there was a happy ending somewhere in there.
I walked over to the couch and collapsed down on the pillows. Sam had left his cartoons on. I turned the tv off and closed my eyes. I thought I had closed them for only a minute but when I opened them again it was dark outside, and Zoey was walking my way.
I reached in the pocket of my jeans for a cigarette.
"Are you allowed to smoke in here?" she asked, looking at me with her surprised, big brown boring eyes.
"Where's Sam?"
"He's in his room doing his homework. I just came down to â"
I cut her off. "I don't remember asking about what you came down for."
She rolled her eyes. I liked it that she did. She was always so happy when I saw her at school. It was only fair I made her miserable when she was here.
"You didn't answer my question," she said.
"I forgot about it already."
"Can you smoke in here?"
I waved the cigarette at her, "Does this look lit up to you?"
And just like that, she smiled, almost an excited smile, and asked, "Is it a metaphor?"
"I don't know what the fuck you're talking about."
"It's like â"
"And I obviously don't want to know."
"Right, of course," she said. "Look, I'm just gonna cut the chase. Do you know where Mr. Colton's car is?"
"I don't even know who Mr. Colton is."
She looked at me like I was stupid, "The school's principal."
"Oh, right," I said. I really wished she hadn't started this conversation. I shrugged. "No, I don't know where his car is. I also don't like it that you're implying that I do."
Zoey took a deep breath, her hand on her waist, her hair barely up. I still couldn't take her seriously. Her eyes were too big, and she had the smallest nose, like an animated princess in a kids movie. What was she gonna do? Call all the forest animals on me?
"You know," she started, "that football game is really important for some people."
I held a finger in the air. "Hold on, I'm searching for a fuck to give."
"I know you have it."
"What? A fuck to give? I swear to you, I don't."
"No, the car."
"You don't know shit."
She crossed her arms over her chest, "Then who's the minivan parked a few blocks away from here?"
"How the fuck am I supposed to know?" I said. Except of course I did. The minivan belonged to the principal. I knew it because I had parked it there after Caitlyn refused to leave it in her neighborhood for fear of it getting stolen by someone other than us.
"I know it was you and Caitlyn," she said.
"Okay, and what are you planning to do with that information?" I asked, reaching for the lighter inside my pocket and getting up to walk outside.
Zoey followed. Too close, I would say, because when I turned my back at the wind to light up the cigarette, she was right there, and the flame almost caught the strand of hair that had fallen in front of her face.
She pushed it away with a curse, stepping back quickly. Too quickly, I would say as well, because I had to reach for her and grab her before she hit the glass door we had left open on the way out.
"Wow, you're such a fucking mess!" I said.
"Just let go of me."
Granted, I was still grabbing her arm, but she didn't need to be so rude about it. I let go of her. She took another deep breath.
"Listen," she started. Again. Maybe I should have let her walk into the glass door after all.
"No," I said with a shrug, the cigarette already between my lips. I lit it up, this time without almost setting her on fire.
"You're the one who asked what I was planning on doing."
"Well, what can I say, I lost interest."
"Tristan, I know you have it," she said, as a matter of fact. "Why not just give it back before things get any worse? Why do you even need it? Your dad has a bunch of cars in the garage."
I wasn't allowed in the garage, but I didn't tell her that. Instead, I blew out the smoke right in her face. She stepped away from it.
"What if I have a hidden agenda against high school football? What then?"
She rolled her eyes, "You don't."
"You don't know me."
"I don't think you care enough about anything to have hidden agendas."
She was not wrong.
"Right, so what makes you think I care about what you want?" I asked, exhaling another cloud of smoke in her direction.
She didn't move this time, "It's not just what I want. It's â"
She kept talking, but I stopped listening. It was something about her friend, and the school's music club, and Sectionals, and some kid throwing up. I didn't care. I didn't care about any of it, so I just finished my cigarette against the backdrop of her voice.
"So?" she finally asked.
"So what?"
"So are you gonna give it back?" Her eyes were wide open again, her arms still crossed over her chest. It was as cold as it had been when she first got here, but it had stopped raining. She was only wearing a t-shirt. She must have taken off her sweater in Sam's room. We were both shaking.
I shrugged, "No."
"Tristan."
I took a deep breath, "Yes, Zoey?"
"I don't understand. Doesn't what I just said change anything, I â"
I stopped her, "This might come as a surprise to you, but I didn't really pay attention to any of it."
"Right."
"Look, I'm not returning the car until Sunday. I have a concert to go to on the other side of town so unless you're gonna turn a pumpkin into a carriage, there's nothing I can do for you."
"I have a car," she said and regretted it.
I laughed, "Really?"
"Iâ I mean, my mom has a car."
I could feel her to disappear from my sight. I could feel myself wanting her to disappear from my sight. Surely the universe had to deliver.
"You would steal your own mom's car for me?" I asked her. She really was something else. Why not just go to the police? I had just admitted to her that I had the car. She knew where it was.
"Not steal it," she said, "Borrow it."
I thought about it.
"Well, why the fuck not?"
She showed me a smile so big I almost regretted agreeing with it.
"Bring me the keys tomorrow."
There, the smile was gone. Much better.
"Well," she started, scratching the back of her neck. "I would have to go with you."
She wanted to add, just to make you sure you don't give it back in pieces, or don't give it back at all, but she didn't.
I said, "No." Of course.
"It's my mom's car."
"Then I guess I'll just keep the principal's minivan."
She let her head fall back in exasperation, "What about one of your dad's cars? Why can't you just go in one of those?"
Because I'm a danger on the road, and Richard knows it.
"That would be none of your business," I told her instead.
"Right, well, how about I just drive you there, wait in the car while you go in, and then get you back home?"
"Don't take this the wrong way. Or do, I don't care. I don't like you. At all. So the less time we spend together, the better â"
"Just pretend I'm not there," she said.
I could do that. I grabbed my phone. I needed to know what Caitlyn thought about this. She picked up almost instantly.
"Hi," I started. "Do you remember Sam's new babysitter?"
"The stupid one?"
"I'm not stupid," Zoey said next to me. I shot her a look for eavesdropping, and she said, "Sorry."
She actually said sorry.
"Yeah, that one," I told Caitlyn. "So, instead of kissing my brother's ass, she's been busy being a pain in mine. She doesn't shut up about the principal's car and the football game."
"She knows?" She sounded surprised. I had been surprised too but I didn't want to admit it in front of Zoey.
"Unfortunately," I said instead. "So, my question is, should I use Richard's golf clubs, or Linda's kitchen knives?"
Caitlyn laughed so hard it was impossible Zoey hadn't heard it. I looked at her looking at me. Sweat shone on her forehead even though she was shaking under the gusts of wind around us.
"That's not funny," she said under her breath.
"I'm not trying to be funny," I told her, but she ignored me, suddenly very interested on the grass beneath her feet.
"The knives would make a big mess. I say golf clubs," Caitlyn said eventually. She had a point, but the golf clubs were in the garage, and again, I wasn't allowed in there. Richard had even changed the code to the door.
"Now seriously," I said. "She offered to drive us to the concert in her mom's car. What do you think?"
"She's not going to the police?" Caitlyn asked.
"No."
"She really is stupid."
"So stupid."
"Well, will she behave?"
I turned to Zoey, "She's asking if you'll behave."
"Of course," Zoey said, very seriously.
"She will," I told Caitlyn.
"I won't be talking to her, just so you know," she said. I hadn't expected anything else. "But anyway, I don't see why that couldn't work."
"Great," I said, and then looked at Zoey. "We have a deal."
She smiled. She was going to regret this.